It's Okay to Not Be Okay (2020)

A walk through life...

This is the first time I was watching an on-air kdrama, so perhaps I won't be able to recall details, but what I do remember is how I felt while watching it. Yes, it was an emotional roller coaster, re-experiencing life you may say!



I got frustrated by some's actions, while the same people made me so proud later on.
I cried tears of pain along with some characters, while later shedding tears of joy for them too.
I got disappointed at some at times, while ending up rooting for them eventually.
I laughed with them and at them, pitied them and regretted on their behalf too...

Meaning that this drama portrayed raw, vulnerable and flawed characters at their 'worst' who are in a journey towards their 'best' selves throughout the drama, while 'healing' the audience along with them in the process. Having said that, watching these episodes, it did't feel like someone was asking you to not cry, nor did it feel like they were crying with you, but simply being there next to you while you cried, patiently waiting. In fact, each episode felt like a therapy almost, with its life lessons, moral of the stories and the general atmosphere that it's being created.

This is when I have to mention the OSTs! They were so much more than just some random background music, that it felt like they are part of the story themselves, and belonged along those wonderful cinematography. Their soothing and peaceful characteristic further intensified simple emotions, while simply conveying complicated once.

Here comes the ACTING! The more I say the less it will be, truly! Though everyone was commendable, still allow me to focus on Moon Gang Tae aka Kim Soo Hyun specifically. What a performance! The way he embraced each and every detail of his character so meticulously, that his very gradual character development couldn't be any more convincing. The arc of those changes was so clear that you can recognise what stage the drama is in just by looking how sincere his smile is!

There's just so much meaning to each frame, so many stories and inspiration that can be gathered,
if not, you can just enjoy a beautiful story of a 'wounded' trio, chasing their happiness. Also as we walk through their life, we seem to re-familiarise with aspects of our own!


Ps. the 'fairy tales' narrated in the drama, are real gems!!!

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A Good Drama…But Unfortunately Just Not My Cup of Tea ><

I was eager to watch this with thrill and excitement especially since it was dealing with psychological aspects and mental health!! Finally seeing Kim Soo Hyun back in action, I was overjoyed only to be underwhelmed by the end >< I really loved the first 6 episodes and was intrigued with how the story would unfold. But as the episodes went on…I felt less and less invested in this show and ending up getting bored. Honestly I wish I knew before hand how slow paced this drama was…slow burning shows are definitely not for me…you have to go into this with a lot of patience and focus especially if you are not one who likes these type of dramas!! A lot scenes felt way too excessive for my liking, and just dragged throughout the episodes where I was tempted to just watch it in fast forward mode. I personally dont think the episodes even needed to be this long and couldve made it more concise…

I think Ye Ji did a fantastic job in playing an antisocial personality disorder, however idk if I could find her character personally likable?? Not sure if she was suppose to be likable from the start or if we were suppose to empathize with her and grow to like her as she started to show character development. She was definitely amusing and I enjoyed her in the first few episodes…however the fact that she had manipulative and possessive traits really rubbed me the wrong way…like the stuff that came out of her mouth towards Gang Tae with no hesitation & how he just shrugged or laughed at it half of the time…im perplexed…those are not things that you should take lightly or in a joking matter?? And her having no problem just screaming what could be deemed as inappropriate in public situations is really unsettling…But I am glad that we got to see her grow by the end of the series; having emotions and caring for others besides herself and putting their needs before her own.

Their “love story” still has me not fully convinced because I cant figure out how or why it started?? It just seemed pretty rushed without any motives of why they fell for each other as kids and somehow that infatuation stayed with them all these years…Its easy to understand why their love grew for each other when their paths crossed again because they were each others safe haven, someone to understand them and give them support. They undoubtedly have amazing chemistry but I had just hoped for a more tangible idea and reasoning behind their attraction??

Gang Tae’s irrational behaviors half the time whenever it dealt with Moon Young became frustrating….especially when he stayed to protect her…while checking up with Sang Tae via phone calls….like what?? all three should've been together in order to make sure they are all safe especially when a dangerous person is out for them…The whole situation was a mess, the communication was nonexistent when there should've been more awareness and caution towards that situation. And I wish there was more detail about Moon Young's mother…I felt like theres still missing pieces to it that Im still pretty curious about but was never touched upon…

All and all, setting aside some of the cons for me, I do want to applaud some pros that I saw throughout the show that I really loved and appreciated!! The OST and overall aesthetics of the show were really beautiful and one of my favorite aspects to the drama, it really embodied the mood of the drama. The way the director/writer integrated the fairy tale story illustrations with thought provoking messages to further emphasize these serious topics but also keep it somewhat lighthearted I think created a nice balance. And like many others have said…but just to re-emphasize…Oh Jung Se’s portrayal of Sang Tae was ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT!! To really understand and delve into his character and its accuracy was so natural and believable, he ended up being one of my favorite characters by the end of the show and really became the sole reason that kept me interested throughout these episodes! His maturity and growth as an individual and his mindset during the last half of the show was sooo heartwarming and beautiful. Im so proud of him and to see his journey of overcoming his trauma; he literally deserves the world and all the happiness. I also loved the Head Doctor of Ok Psychiatric Hospital, he was soo funny and just a great person!! He really cared about his patients and treated them like a family! Honestly everyone did a great job in their portrayals especially the actors/actresses that suffered through trauma or other mental illnesses and to see them tackle their traumas/issues. You can really empathize with each and every one of them and understand where they are coming from. And the ending was very sweet and beautiful, I LOVED IT!! The dialogue at the end wrapped up the story very nicely! Overall the story was good but its not something that gave me a lasting impression…

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Overhyped. Overrated

I don’t understand all the ravings it got from people here. I found the plot twists, character behavior and acting terrible and yes ridiculous. The “I love you” yelling at each other is ridiculously executed, no feelings, an ill attempt to sound romantic and comical and just contrived like watching a high school drama play. The male lead is supposedly the highest paid actor - oh wow! What a joke. For him to earn so much for such shallow, robotic acting? The female lead portrayal of an anti social is exaggerated, unrealistic and Overdone. This is an over hyped and overrated kdrama and probably rated bec the leads are celebrities. Don’t waste you time.

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Could not stop whining!

I watched this drama as soon as it was out ... and what a disappointment.
I understand, due to its uniqueness, why lot of people liked it, though. And its approach on mental illness that is a trendy subject nowadays. But the story is lacking a lot, using FL's ASPD (Anti-Social Personality Disorder) and Moon Sang-tae (Gang-Tae’s older brother), Autism Spectrum Disorder as main sources for the plot. I absolutely loved Oh Jung-Se in his role, what a fabulous actor. He succeeded to portrait his character with Autism brilliantly. On the contrary, i did not like Seo Yae-Ji in her role. I found that the ASPD was not well conveyed, and her character ended up being a spoiled brat rather who acts recklessly and do not care about anyone but her, rather than a complex character with sociopath tendencies who would have had therapy and gone under medication for her personality disorder.
Finally, ML's character is this understanding and patient young man who raised his brother, feeling guilty about their past .... who ends up loving the FL as a freedom from the trap that his life is. Yet, it looks like more a Stockholm syndrome.

We understand that the FL and ML are safety pins for each other ... but are they, really ? The morale of the story is that 2 people who love each other can save each other ..... and in this specific story i did not like this fairy tale ending while the main plot was about realistic mental illness. Love can't treat ASPD ... and i felt that if you have to imagine the rest of their lives together ... it will be 2 lives completely ruined. Or was it the morale of the story ? That love can be this stupid sometimes, that people will ruin each other in name of Love ?
But again, i loved Sang Tae character and ending. While people with autism have a hard time to distinguish nuances, yet he succeeded to understand what his brother was lacking and wanted. As a big brother, he only wants to protect his young brother. His character is full of charms and emotions.

Now the fairy tale components and the outfits of Yae-Ji are both beautiful, but it was not enough to make me fall for the Main characters or the story overall. At the end, this drama just did not deliver for me !

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A beautiful but fast-paced exploration of trauma and the struggle towards everyday joy . . .

*My thoughts on the portrayals of trauma/abuse and 'red-flags' in a postnote at the end of this review*

The plot builds in layers. There is something for everyone:
1) murder mystery with serial killer/sociopathic type elements
2) romantic suspense, ‘ill-fated’ love, childhood love, lots of protectiveness and rescuing from both genders
3) gothic fairytale/stylistic elements each ‘chapter’ or ‘episode’ features a fairytale moral or theme
4) Patient of the week storylines

A minor complaint is that there were some 'excess' storylines with little impact/point, but I did not feel for one minute that there was any true wasted time.

What keeps you on the edge of your seat, is the excellent fast, pacing. This is not a ‘quiet’ drama with lots of pauses, and long lingering glances. For those who find character development and inner self progression boring, the second half of the drama may feel less exciting – but for me it was actually the opposite. I got more excited/addicted as the episodes went on.

Many of the actors appear regularly in other popular dramas, but I was able to 'buy in' to their roles instantly from the three main leads to the patients in the hospital. I will also add the main couple had amazing romantic chemistry, naturalistic acting and physical ease with each other. I think this drama had some of the best romantic scenes I’ve seen.

The music sets a great tone, though half point off for the opening credits being a bit bland. I've already re-watched certain scenes numerous times.

I grade on other criteria as well:

Complex Themes - 10
Finally! A drama that acknowledges nightmarish side of human nature and that the road to a good life does not necessarily lie with reconciliation but recognising you deserve and are capable of joy. Expressing emotions, especially vulnerable ones from traumatic life experiences, is the key to finding joy and meaning to live in a world that can be cruel.

Character Growth - 10
While all three main leads are very different on the outside, they all start the drama lost on the inside. Watching the journey, and struggle for something different was meaningful. These are not at all the same characters at the beginning as the end.

Complex roles for women and relationships - 8
Ko Moon-Young is a beautifully complex character: brash and loud and vulnerable all at once, and I liked the very complex feelings she had for her mother. Beyond that complicated relationship, however, the women do not have much overlapping plots or interactions, The rest of the women are caricatures from the loving, always cooking mother figure, to the quiet/shy but jealous friend.

Production design/cinematography - 10
The show deserves a 10 just for the creative way it portrays mental states and trauma. But on top of that, the cinematography is beautiful and the sets have high production values. You can hit pause at almost any point and each frame looks like a painting. Ko Moon-Young has a wonderful makeup/clothing/style concept as well which is just an added bonus.

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Some thoughts on trauma and abuse portrayed in the show:

One big warning label with this show is that it normalises a lot of 'red flags' for romantic relationships. The truth is that if you were starting to date someone who displays the behaviours of any of the three main leads (aggressive anger, not taking no for an answer, inability to express emotion, inability to cope with day to day reality etc.) it would be best to just walk away. In real life, most people do not come to the realizations the 3 main leads do so late in life. It's what makes a good drama, but it's important to not live your own life by this.

In terms of realism, this drama uses a more stage play/stylized format to get to a deeper truth than many more 'gritty' realistic tv and movies. While the pace is not ‘realistic’, the pacing allows for many traumatic stories and many ways to overcome trauma in a way that sitting working through trauma quietly for hours of screen-time just can’t capture.

Many fictional portrayals of trauma and abuse function as exploitative, trauma porn - just endless hours of suffering and grief and no way out. Often those who inflict trauma/abuse are portrayed as either sociopathic serial killers or abusers who are actually good at heart and that you should forgive/reconcile.

This show does an excellent job of showing a huge spectrum of abuse and trauma situations from unintentional inflicted trauma to deliberate, vindictive harm. It does an excellent job of explaining that many of the worst traits in humans stem from the refusal to feel 'warmth' or simple, everyday joys. It shows how life experiences can lead a person to believe that they are undeserving of joy, incapable of feeling joy, or perhaps worst of all that you are too superior, too special to care about such silly things as joy.

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Everything goes downhill after the haircut

It's a good show but it has some serious flaws. The production, style, OST and acting were on point.

The good:
- How they connected the dark fairytales with the ongoing events was original and gave the show a darkish fairytale atmosphere.
- The FL was indeed toxic but that's what I liked, Shows with anti-heros lead are my favorite and there's never enough of them, specially the FL, it's always the ML.
- Sang tae was really well written and acted.
- The comedy aspect was well written and made me laugh most of the time.
- The last episode was heart warming and didn't made me feel like I wasted my time.

The bad:
- The ML was too wooden, I don't know how KSH being the star that he is accepted a role meant for a newbie. I say it b/c I didn't know who he was when I watched and I barely noticed him beside his crying scenes nothing really stood out for me.
- The main plot twist and the resolution of the mystery was a hard miss, all over the place and didn't make sense. It's ok for a show to miss some plot here and there but this was the main mystery that was building from the start, they should've at least come up with something logical and try to explain the jarring potholes if nothing else.
- They dropped the gloomy fairytalish atmosphere in the second half for some reason and it became a classic melodrama-romance with comedy here and there.

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Oh Jung-se is so dang good.

It’s Okay to Not be Okay, wasn’t really my kind of story, and that’s okay. Most of the reason I kept watching was to follow the super long reddit threads. The show didn’t do anything wrong (actually I’d argue it did very few things wrong); it just never got me. Maybe binge watching would have made me more invested, or maybe it would’ve made things 40 times worse. It’s not something that I could relate to, although I’m sure it will speak to a lot of people.

By far the most striking aspect of the show initially was the cinematography. The directing style was vivid, and the sets were beautiful. The tone is this consistent, creepy-ish, melancholy but hopeful vibe. It’s characterized by a quiet elegance that really works if you’re in the mood for it. The OST is really great and it fits well with everything else.

The slow plot movement is my real issue. The mysterious aspect of this show didn’t work for me, and I’ve learned that I need more plot-driven stories. I was never excited to watch the next episode. Every episode could have been the last one, and I wouldn’t have minded. The ending is ultimately satisfying, but it still leaves some questions unanswered.

However, what this show lacks in plot movement, it makes up for in adorable characters that I loved watching. The whole supporting cast is hilarious, and although it isn’t exactly a comedy, it makes you laugh at the right moments. And it makes you cry too. The main leads never got my heart, but I still feel like I’ve gone on a journey with these characters.

The Main Cast:

Kim Soo-hyun was the reason everybody started watching, and the man is really talented, I’ll admit. He somehow always has me on his side, even when I couldn’t relate to him. The chemistry between him and Seo Ye-ji was really great too. I don’t have a lot to say about Seo Ye-ji, but I think she was well cast for this part.

For me, Oh Jung-se was the star of this show and the reason to keep watching. I had a huge soft spot for his character, and I thought he did an amazing job bringing Moon Sang-tae to life. You could see him really becoming Sang-tae in everything from his face to the way he held himself. I’m a new fan. I’ll watch anything he does now.

Supporting Cast/Characters:

I really loved Jae-soo (Kang Gi-doong). I loved his character, and I thought the performance was great. I wish he got more of a spotlight in this story, but he stole the scenes he was in.

I always love Kim Mi-kyung, and I liked her here too. She’s the best mom.

Lee Sang-in (Kim Joo-heon) and Yoo Seung-jae (Park Jin-joo) made a great pair. Their scenes together and apart were always hilarious. I’ve got my eye on Park Jin-joo now, and I hope she gets more prominent roles in the future.

The OK Hospital people were also a nice big family. Some standouts were Kim Chang-wan as the hospital director and patients Kan Pil-wong (Kim Ki-cheon) and Joo Jung-tae (Jung Jae-kwang).

Oh also the child actors were good. Yeah I don’t have anything bad to say here really. Great cast all around.

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2020's best Korean drama & masterpiece bar none.

What can I say about this masterpiece that hasn't been said by many already? I'll do my best but I don't think I can fully give this drama the justice it deserves with my tiny review lol but I'll try, so here goes.

Everything about the drama was perfect, the acting, the story line, the setting, the characters, and especially the life lessons it taught us and the emotions it made us feel. I feel like we learned so much thru the 3 main characters:

Kangtae- It's okay to hide emotions when it's necessary to protect & look after someone who is loved. But never to the point that your own identity is lost & you don't know who you are anymore. Where being a robot, becomes your daily routine especially when there's feelings of obligation and guilt in your need to look after someone. It's better to be true to yourself, be honest with your feelings and those you love and never, never lose yourself because the most important thing is loving yourself and being happy.

Munyeong- It's okay to be a little psycho because it's your way of dealing with a traumatizing experience & protecting yourself. But, never let the pain of the past eat you up to the point of becoming too secluded or evil. It's always better to. turn the pain in to something productive to keep that light inside of you going abd be true to yourself. Be helping others find themselves, you can find yourself too + happiness.

Sangtae-It's okay to be different and want everyone's attention . But even if your different never give up on becoming stronger, better and learn how to look after yourself. It's never okay to demand way too much of someone because that can eat away at someone else's happiness. Strive to learn how to do things by yourself if it can be done to make yourself happy and those around you too. + family is not just blood but people who are loved by you. Ps. I think his growth was one of the best of the series, him letting his little brother go at the end????? *tears.

I felt so much thru the characters everything they experienced I did too.

All of the cast shone, I love how Seo Ye-Ji was able to turn her emotions of and on on a whim. She was so good as MY that I sometimes forgot I was watching a fictional character rather than an actual person. This was Kim Soo-Hyun's strongest role yet IMO. His crying scenes broke my heart so many times. And Oh Jung Se stole the show with his incredible acting, I forgot that he isn't actually autistic in real life. That's how good he was. He definitely deserves all the awards for this role.

The story could be quite dark at times esp with the murder of the Moon brother's mother and Munyeoung's emotional/physical abuse by her parents. BUT it also had this warmth to it, watching these characters stand up again and achieve their own much needed emotional growth and happiness was breathtaking. They all saved each other and helped one another heal. If it hadn't been for MunYeong the Moon Brother's wouldn't have healed from their past feelings of hatred, guilt, anger and obligation. If it hadn't been for the Moon Brothers MY wouldn't have known that she was worth being in a family and being happy. Because of each other past pain was forgotten and healing began.

Aside from the love story I think the other biggest, strongest point in the series was the love and bond between Sangtae and Kangtae. it was as equally important and we saw all their ups and downs. How they became healthy in the end to become stronger in the end and learn to live life separately in the end. The writers did an excellent job in telling these stories never missing a beat and making us feel everything.

The chemistry between the 3 main actors was amazing, I'd love to see them working together again. If it happens and it's soon then even better. The supporting cast was also amazing. I loved all the supporting characters they all had their merits and were equally important to the story and the main characters personal growth.

The soundtrack was amazing! Every song was picked perfectly and fir the tone of the scenes were it was used very well. I don't think there's a song I disliked in the OST.

Overall 10/10 I'd give this higher if I could because it deserves it. Will I be rewatching this??? You bet! One of my top favorite dramas for sure!

Phew this was long lmao. I guess I had a lot to say. But yeah, if you haven't seen this yet do yourself a favor and do. It's worth it.

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Desired

I don't know from where should I start. I'm glad that 김수현 오빠 has taken role for this drama.
Story : Wow, such a meaningful story. Psychological disorder, Butterfly trauma, butterfly hug, dead soul of 고명의 아빠가.. The mistery, the thrill.
Acting/Cast: ohh I had known that 사이코지만 괜찮아 will be such a 대박. First: 티비엔 드라마. Secondly: cast!! 김수현, 서예지 언니, 오정세 아저씨.. Such a great actors who can deliver to us emotions, chills and smile&laugh. Chemistry between FL and ML just- I full of desire, Safety pin?? After 8화 방송 finally he has been freed. Seeing Gang Tae smiling fills my heart with happiness.
Music : 100000/10 The OST correctly reflects this kdrama. I bet after 사이코지만 괜찮아 ends the songs will send us to the story, emotions. 헤이즈, 갬김, AKMU and other artists thank you very much.
Rewatch value: I think 16 episodes is enough to close the action,because from episode to episode the plot is developing very well. Moreover one episode has more than 60 minutes. So far 8화 방송 has had the longest duration-1h 15min.46 seconds.
Overall, everyone this is the kdrama that we all have been waiting for. The drama that has been desired by many of us. Powerful romance, charming eyes, desire, psychological aspects, some funny scenes, and well performed characters! ♥♥

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Was promising, but ultimately fell flat and held onto surface level issues

As someone with a brother on the ASD spectrum and who works in healthcare, I had a lot of hope going in. I was recommended the drama by a friend who also has a brother with ASD, otherwise I wasn't too intrigued by the drama's trailer or plot.

The drama, while it isn't the most pretentious thing I've ever seen, fails to deliver a plot which viewers will find engaging. I appreciate its more toned down approach to look into healing and bring awareness to mental illnesses and disabilities like ASD, but I think it fails in all other departments. I also think the relationship feels extremely contrived and is too sudden for me to take it seriously, especially because it leans on toxic: why must these two end up together when they have so many issues they need to work on? Sure, there is understanding between the two, but I wish there was a more organic growth shown.

Given how long these episodes were, I thought we would see a richer look into the psyche of individual characters, but instead we got surface level pretentious-ness and some mediocre comedy. There was so much potential for these characters given the production and cast, but it all fell flat which is a shame. I did like Oh Jung Se's portrayal of ASD though, so I will have to give him that. I failed to find any other characters as endearing, except perhaps the female lead, although at times she felt like a contrarian for the sake of being a contrarian, and not really rooted in the feelings of a real person.

Also, the pacing of this drama is very off. Some episodes feel like pure filler, and the mystery in the drama is poorly placed. I even forgot there was a mystery, because it would take so many episodes to come back to it.

I thought the first few episodes were great but it went downhill from there. It's unfortunate but I cannot continue to waste more hours of my life on this disappointment, so I'll have to drop it at episode 11. It just isn't worth it for me.

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This is so bad I want to give it a 0 but I can't so I'm giving it a 1

This is without a doubt the worst drama I have ever watched.
Dear lord I cannot believe people enjoyed this! Do they think that good-looking people should just get away with the absolute worst behaviour!

Pros
- some great costumes
- The FLs house is an amazing set
- Music is good
- Allegory's a interesting

Cons
- The portrayal of every mental health issue in this is terrible at best and damaging at worst
- why would I want to watch a narcissist get everything she wants while acting terribly to everyone around her. (I know the excuse is a tough childhood, but seriously does that excuse everything! - to quote Jake Perolta "Cool motive, still murder") Her actions are often inexcusable.
- The male lead is a covert narcissist too. He is obviously not well mentally either, the chip on his shoulder should have crushed him to death already.
- The leads knew each other as kids trope is weak
- the plot is dumb, a villian getting surgery to look like someone else is a lame Bond film plot.

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