Dramas With Unhealthy Relationships

Misty

Cheese in The Trap works too

 NiSkywalker:

why is it unhealthy relationship?  it is one of most  real chemistry drama, supportive to each other and loyal till the end... drama misleads in the beginning like ML is bad and psycho but he is good guy; yes he hides his past even from her, but it's understandable why and I would say one of healthy relationships, not like many "perfect couples" in dramas full of unhealthy moments which are romantized like they are signs of love...

What I mean is, for me, we can't describe their relationship as a healthy one... He did things and hid a lot from her, even in the beginning he confessed he didn't like her and just married her for his cover etc... Maybe our definition of what is an unhealthy relationship differs, however in my opinion a healthy relationship is for instance the romance between Xing Ke Lei and Mi Ka in YAMH or maybe the one in SWDBS etc... We can't deny he's kind of toxic for her (at least in the first and middle part of the drama): he doesn't bring her positivity, I will even say that he just brings her troubles and insecurity, his feelings about her aren't that clear, he's making her doubt about herself... 

I mean I loooove this drama, and I find their romance realistic and truly moving! The plot is insane and all this situation is understandable and delivered as it should be! Yet, their love story is really unhealthy in my opinion: This might change at the end of the show since they supposed that they remain together and try again! Then, here because they are honest with each other and they try to overcome their issues then it could change 

As I said, it's just my opinion of what I think that could be described as an unhealthy relationship since I don't consider it unhealthy just because it's bad or the main leads aren't good to each other (cheating, overprotective characters, rape, slap/kiss, manipulative characters...). For me, "just" a toxic relationship is unhealthy but it could still be a really beautiful love story that revolves around confidence, hope, and love! 

 NiSkywalker:

I'll just say FOR MY TASTE more unhealthy and unrealistic is even that common moment in dramas

Well, i guess we all have our own opinions haha

I totally got what you mean, you're very clear and I kind of agree with you. He didn't do things to hurt her on purpose and his past conducts him to make his choices. I can't agree with you more than I already do on that point. 

It's really hard for me to make you understand my point of view since we don't agree on certain aspects. I'm sorry to say that but, always in my opinion, I can't see their story (in the first to the middle part of the drama) as a healthy love story.  As you watched the drama, you can see how much the FL was hurt by some of the revelations, when she learned why he married her, when he told his sister he never loved her (I know it's because he thinks he isn't able to love someone because of his past etc...). Yet, the FL was truly hurt by that. She also doubted him due to all his lies he constantly said until she learns the truth by HERSELF! He never admits or communicates with her about all this situation before. So, he in fact lied to her and hide his true identity. But it's also true that it was to escape from his past, so understable and forgivable... 

Well, that's why I consider it an unhealthy relationship. I can't get where it could be good and positive for them (always in the first to the middle part of the drama)? He wasn't wrong in what he did, it's not my sayings but he was still toxic for her... (for me at least). What I mean is he wasn't toxic as a man or person! It was their relationship as a love story that was toxic at that time. I know maybe we can't agree on each other perspectives but I still find it really interesting to see your point of view. So thank u very much to share your thoughts about it while being polite and friendly, I really appreciate :)

Moreover, I don't compare FOE with some "usual rom-com" that try to represent the perfect love story even if they are totally unhealthy! For me, FOE in his own way portrays a beautiful story where a man tries to escape his past and fight his demons while his woman has to face the situation without knowing who her own husband is and what he could have done back then! Their "blurred" feelings, their secrets, the lies... are, for me, what makes their relationship unhealthy. An unhealthy relationship doesn't automatically tell that a drama is bad! I found it even more realistic, how many love stories are toxic in real life? I really like how FOE carried that part of the drama and guided us towards a new type of relationship by the end of the drama. I thought that it was pretty obvious, well we all interpret differently what we see, that's the beauty of art (cinema in that case).

As I said, I totally understand and agree with you when you say they are natural, warm towards each other at some points in the drama. However, I don't consider their chemistry or some of the moments you mentioned (mostly by the final part of the drama) as the generality of their love story... I would say that in some parts of the drama, they were in a toxic or at least in a complicated relationship that brings anxiety, suspicions, heavy tension between them that made them unhealthy for each other. It's a piece of their story, for me :)

Where I might be wrong and I 100% agree with you is that FOE is much less toxic/unhealthy than the other dramas' relationships in the list I've submitted. FOE doesn't really fit the criteria of this description's post but I still recommended it in that post since I consider that a form of unhealthiness exists in their story :)