I genuinely need people to explain to me how Shang Zhitao is the “red flag” in this situation, because I feel like we are watching two completely different dramas. 😭 And before anyone says it — NO, I am not comparing the drama to the novel. I have read the novel, I am very much a novel reader, and I deliberately judge the drama as its own adaptation. If anything, Luan Nian was even worse in the novel, so let’s leave the novel out of this discussion.
First of all, let’s establish what their relationship actually IS. They started with a one-night stand, and HE was the one who pursued her afterwards and wanted the friends-with-benefits arrangement. Then, through the time jumps/montages, we are explicitly told that by her second year at the company, they are actually boyfriend and girlfriend. It is literally in the dialogue. I genuinely don't understand why people keep talking about them as if they are still just casually sleeping together. THEY ARE IN A RELATIONSHIP.
And Shang Zhitao wanting to keep it secret makes perfect sense to me.
This girl is a fresh 22-year-old graduate who has come from her hometown to Beijing to build a career. She is a complete newcomer in the workplace, and her boyfriend is literally her BOSS. Her BOSS. Of course she doesn't want everyone knowing.
Because let's be realistic about what happens if that relationship becomes public.
First, every achievement she makes will immediately be questioned. People will say, “Of course she got this opportunity, she's sleeping with the boss.” All of her actual work and effort will be reduced to Luan Nian helping her or giving her an unfair advantage.
Second, they work in advertising/media, where everyone knows everyone and information travels FAST. If the relationship eventually ends badly, who do you think has more to lose professionally? Luan Nian is already established, talented, respected and valuable to the company and the industry. Shang Zhitao is a young newcomer who is still learning the ropes. If their relationship becomes workplace gossip, SHE is the one who risks being labelled as “the girl who slept with her boss.” How exactly is she supposed to build a career after that?
So no, there is absolutely nothing wrong with her wanting to protect her career.
And I think this is where a lot of people lose me when they criticize her. Apparently the female lead is supposed to automatically fall in love with the male lead, prioritize him over everything, follow his decisions, and never disagree with him. The second she has her own opinion or chooses her career over him, suddenly she's a “red flag.”
Why?
She is a person. She has ambitions. She has a career. She is allowed to make decisions that don't revolve around Luan Nian.
And then we get to the situation where she made a mistake at work.
Yes, Luan Nian was right to reprimand her as her BOSS. I am not arguing against that. He has a responsibility to maintain professional standards, and he shouldn't give her special treatment just because she's his girlfriend.
BUT HE IS ALSO HER BOYFRIEND.
That is the part people keep conveniently ignoring.
Shang Zhitao literally has conflicting feelings about the situation herself. She knows he shouldn't give her special treatment. She doesn't WANT him to compromise his professional standards for her. She understands that he is her boss and that she needs to take responsibility for her mistake.
But at the same time, she is hurt that the person who is supposed to be her boyfriend showed absolutely no emotional support when she was already upset.
Those two feelings can exist at the same time!!!
She can understand why he punished her professionally AND still wish that her boyfriend would comfort her privately.
Why are people acting like being her boss cancels out being her boyfriend?
And then Episodes 12–13 bring up the whole Alex poaching situation, and again, people are calling Shang Zhitao a red flag because she considered an offer from someone else.
SHE WAS CONSIDERING IT.
She hadn't made a decision.
If someone offered you a potentially better career opportunity, are you seriously telling me you wouldn't even THINK about it? Especially when you're a young person trying to establish yourself?
Of course she was tempted. I would be tempted too.
And ultimately, SHE CHOSE TO STAY.
By the end of Episode 13, she has not abandoned Luan Nian or betrayed him for her career. She considered an opportunity and then made her decision. That's called being an adult and thinking about your future.
Meanwhile, let's talk about Luan Nian.
I actually LIKE Luan Nian as a character. I think he loves Shang Zhitao. I think his feelings for her are genuine. I don't think he's secretly some monster who doesn't care about her.
But loving someone does not automatically make your behaviour healthy.
From the very beginning, this man has repeatedly belittled her in different ways. He literally told her that she didn't belong in the company and should start looking for another job. And even after their relationship develops, that attitude doesn't magically disappear.
As her boss, he can criticize her work. He can reprimand her. He can tell her where she went wrong. He can push her to improve.
But as her boyfriend, where is the emotional affirmation?
Where is the “I'm proud of you”?
Where is the “you did well”?
Where is the comfort?
Where is the reassurance?
He doesn't have to treat her differently at work, but he DOES need to know how to treat his girlfriend like his girlfriend outside of work.
You cannot expect someone to completely switch off their emotions just because their boyfriend happens to also be their boss.
And no, I don't think Luan Nian is a “green flag.” But I also think the whole green-flag/red-flag terminology has become way too simplistic. Fictional characters are not relationship warning labels. People can have good qualities AND deeply problematic behaviours.
Luan Nian is talented, intelligent, protective and clearly deeply in love with her.
He is ALSO sarcastic, emotionally repressed, controlling at times, dismissive, and constantly puts her down.
Both things can be true.
And honestly, some of the things he says to her are just straight-up insulting. Calling her “cheap and obedient” is not some cute expression of love or jealousy. You cannot talk to an employee like that, and you certainly shouldn't talk to your girlfriend like that.
And this is exactly why I don't understand the “Shang Zhitao is the red flag, Luan Nian did nothing wrong” discourse.
You don't have to hate Luan Nian to understand Shang Zhitao.
You don't have to excuse everything Shang Zhitao does either.
But PLEASE stop treating every disagreement where the woman doesn't immediately obey the male lead as proof that she is toxic.
She is a 22-year-old woman trying to build a life and career while being secretly involved with her much more established boss. She has feelings, insecurities, ambitions, doubts and conflicting emotions.
Of course she's going to make imperfect decisions.
That's what makes her HUMAN.
And honestly, I think that's the entire point of their relationship so far. They love each other, but they are not equals yet — professionally, emotionally, or in the way they communicate. Shang Zhitao is still learning how to stand on her own, while Luan Nian is still learning that loving someone doesn't mean controlling them, belittling them, or expecting them to fit into your life exactly the way you want.
So yes, I will criticize Shang Zhitao when she deserves criticism.
But calling her a “red flag” simply because she has her own career ambitions, doesn't want her relationship exposed at work, gets hurt when her boyfriend doesn't comfort her, or dares to consider another career opportunity?
They ending is so confusing like is SE or OE like the dialogue from boze and qingyu implies he survived but they cut to the dream sequence like what???
I love how ren sudu brought a tranquilizer with her because she knew how madly he is in love with her enough to do anything she was prepared in advance to stop him.
A lot of people are sympathizing with 5th Prince chang Qing, you need to understand it was in the novel as well in the show as well the Crown Prince still confirmed it but his wife did not want to marry him but she has no choice but obviously has so she had to marry him he loved her okay but she did not owe him to love him back to do not want that marriage she was not happy in marriage and that marriage actually led to her whole family executed.
I seriously hate this grandfather. The female lead is standing right in front of him, completely devastated after everything that happened with Lu Lixiao, and all he can talk about is how much they "invested" in him. The way he speaks doesn't even sound like he's talking about his grandson—it sounds like he's talking about a business investment.
The irony is insane because it's his family that ruined Lu Lixiao's life in the first place. They refused to let his mother leave that marriage, and she ended up taking her own life. Since then, Lu Lixiao has just been existing, never truly happy until Zhou Wan came into his life. Whatever her intentions were at first is a separate issue, but she was the first person who made him genuinely happy again.
And don't even get me started on how they treat him now. Yes, the grandfather did visit him in the hospital, but that's it. Lu Lixiao was literally stabbed. In a normal family, someone would stay by his side and take care of him. I can excuse the grandfather because of his age, but where was everyone else? His aunt? The rest of the family? Instead, it was the housekeeper and Zhou Wan who were there for him.
That's when it really hit me—this isn't a family, it's a business empire. Everything is a transaction. Everything is about obligations, investments, and business deals. No wonder Lu Lixiao grew up feeling so alone. The father isn't even worth my attention, but this grandfather? I can't stand him.
so lu xixiao's mother is a mistress who cheated with his father and broke his family which is jiang yan and his…
What always bothered me is that Jiang Yan directs most of his anger at Lu Xixiao and his mother, calling them outsiders, when neither of them created the situation. Lu Xixiao's mother entered an arranged marriage and was never the one hiding a second relationship.
If anyone deserves the blame, it's the father. He chose family wealth and status over the woman he claimed to love, married someone else, and then continued the relationship instead of ending it. He hurt both women and both children.
Jiang Yan's mother also chose to stay once she knew he was married, so she isn't completely innocent either. But Lu Xixiao and his mother were not the villains of the story. The real source of the problem was the father, yet he's the one people in the story seem least willing to hold accountable.
So I liked the novel a lot but I would have to say I prefer the drama this time. They really added a lot to the plot without making completey disconnected from the novel. Btw I really don't like exact copy of novel sooo
I just read the whole script and novel in 2 days quite a few similarities in scene but a big change in the middle just before the separation. I love spoilers so when I get hold of the script I had to read it.. I loved it. I kind of cried
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First of all, let’s establish what their relationship actually IS. They started with a one-night stand, and HE was the one who pursued her afterwards and wanted the friends-with-benefits arrangement. Then, through the time jumps/montages, we are explicitly told that by her second year at the company, they are actually boyfriend and girlfriend. It is literally in the dialogue. I genuinely don't understand why people keep talking about them as if they are still just casually sleeping together. THEY ARE IN A RELATIONSHIP.
And Shang Zhitao wanting to keep it secret makes perfect sense to me.
This girl is a fresh 22-year-old graduate who has come from her hometown to Beijing to build a career. She is a complete newcomer in the workplace, and her boyfriend is literally her BOSS. Her BOSS. Of course she doesn't want everyone knowing.
Because let's be realistic about what happens if that relationship becomes public.
First, every achievement she makes will immediately be questioned. People will say, “Of course she got this opportunity, she's sleeping with the boss.” All of her actual work and effort will be reduced to Luan Nian helping her or giving her an unfair advantage.
Second, they work in advertising/media, where everyone knows everyone and information travels FAST. If the relationship eventually ends badly, who do you think has more to lose professionally? Luan Nian is already established, talented, respected and valuable to the company and the industry. Shang Zhitao is a young newcomer who is still learning the ropes. If their relationship becomes workplace gossip, SHE is the one who risks being labelled as “the girl who slept with her boss.” How exactly is she supposed to build a career after that?
So no, there is absolutely nothing wrong with her wanting to protect her career.
And I think this is where a lot of people lose me when they criticize her. Apparently the female lead is supposed to automatically fall in love with the male lead, prioritize him over everything, follow his decisions, and never disagree with him. The second she has her own opinion or chooses her career over him, suddenly she's a “red flag.”
Why?
She is a person. She has ambitions. She has a career. She is allowed to make decisions that don't revolve around Luan Nian.
And then we get to the situation where she made a mistake at work.
Yes, Luan Nian was right to reprimand her as her BOSS. I am not arguing against that. He has a responsibility to maintain professional standards, and he shouldn't give her special treatment just because she's his girlfriend.
BUT HE IS ALSO HER BOYFRIEND.
That is the part people keep conveniently ignoring.
Shang Zhitao literally has conflicting feelings about the situation herself. She knows he shouldn't give her special treatment. She doesn't WANT him to compromise his professional standards for her. She understands that he is her boss and that she needs to take responsibility for her mistake.
But at the same time, she is hurt that the person who is supposed to be her boyfriend showed absolutely no emotional support when she was already upset.
Those two feelings can exist at the same time!!!
She can understand why he punished her professionally AND still wish that her boyfriend would comfort her privately.
Why are people acting like being her boss cancels out being her boyfriend?
And then Episodes 12–13 bring up the whole Alex poaching situation, and again, people are calling Shang Zhitao a red flag because she considered an offer from someone else.
SHE WAS CONSIDERING IT.
She hadn't made a decision.
If someone offered you a potentially better career opportunity, are you seriously telling me you wouldn't even THINK about it? Especially when you're a young person trying to establish yourself?
Of course she was tempted. I would be tempted too.
And ultimately, SHE CHOSE TO STAY.
By the end of Episode 13, she has not abandoned Luan Nian or betrayed him for her career. She considered an opportunity and then made her decision. That's called being an adult and thinking about your future.
Meanwhile, let's talk about Luan Nian.
I actually LIKE Luan Nian as a character. I think he loves Shang Zhitao. I think his feelings for her are genuine. I don't think he's secretly some monster who doesn't care about her.
But loving someone does not automatically make your behaviour healthy.
From the very beginning, this man has repeatedly belittled her in different ways. He literally told her that she didn't belong in the company and should start looking for another job. And even after their relationship develops, that attitude doesn't magically disappear.
As her boss, he can criticize her work. He can reprimand her. He can tell her where she went wrong. He can push her to improve.
But as her boyfriend, where is the emotional affirmation?
Where is the “I'm proud of you”?
Where is the “you did well”?
Where is the comfort?
Where is the reassurance?
He doesn't have to treat her differently at work, but he DOES need to know how to treat his girlfriend like his girlfriend outside of work.
You cannot expect someone to completely switch off their emotions just because their boyfriend happens to also be their boss.
And no, I don't think Luan Nian is a “green flag.” But I also think the whole green-flag/red-flag terminology has become way too simplistic. Fictional characters are not relationship warning labels. People can have good qualities AND deeply problematic behaviours.
Luan Nian is talented, intelligent, protective and clearly deeply in love with her.
He is ALSO sarcastic, emotionally repressed, controlling at times, dismissive, and constantly puts her down.
Both things can be true.
And honestly, some of the things he says to her are just straight-up insulting. Calling her “cheap and obedient” is not some cute expression of love or jealousy. You cannot talk to an employee like that, and you certainly shouldn't talk to your girlfriend like that.
And this is exactly why I don't understand the “Shang Zhitao is the red flag, Luan Nian did nothing wrong” discourse.
You don't have to hate Luan Nian to understand Shang Zhitao.
You don't have to excuse everything Shang Zhitao does either.
But PLEASE stop treating every disagreement where the woman doesn't immediately obey the male lead as proof that she is toxic.
She is a 22-year-old woman trying to build a life and career while being secretly involved with her much more established boss. She has feelings, insecurities, ambitions, doubts and conflicting emotions.
Of course she's going to make imperfect decisions.
That's what makes her HUMAN.
And honestly, I think that's the entire point of their relationship so far. They love each other, but they are not equals yet — professionally, emotionally, or in the way they communicate. Shang Zhitao is still learning how to stand on her own, while Luan Nian is still learning that loving someone doesn't mean controlling them, belittling them, or expecting them to fit into your life exactly the way you want.
So yes, I will criticize Shang Zhitao when she deserves criticism.
But calling her a “red flag” simply because she has her own career ambitions, doesn't want her relationship exposed at work, gets hurt when her boyfriend doesn't comfort her, or dares to consider another career opportunity?
Be serious. 😭
The irony is insane because it's his family that ruined Lu Lixiao's life in the first place. They refused to let his mother leave that marriage, and she ended up taking her own life. Since then, Lu Lixiao has just been existing, never truly happy until Zhou Wan came into his life. Whatever her intentions were at first is a separate issue, but she was the first person who made him genuinely happy again.
And don't even get me started on how they treat him now. Yes, the grandfather did visit him in the hospital, but that's it. Lu Lixiao was literally stabbed. In a normal family, someone would stay by his side and take care of him. I can excuse the grandfather because of his age, but where was everyone else? His aunt? The rest of the family? Instead, it was the housekeeper and Zhou Wan who were there for him.
That's when it really hit me—this isn't a family, it's a business empire. Everything is a transaction. Everything is about obligations, investments, and business deals. No wonder Lu Lixiao grew up feeling so alone. The father isn't even worth my attention, but this grandfather? I can't stand him.
If anyone deserves the blame, it's the father. He chose family wealth and status over the woman he claimed to love, married someone else, and then continued the relationship instead of ending it. He hurt both women and both children.
Jiang Yan's mother also chose to stay once she knew he was married, so she isn't completely innocent either. But Lu Xixiao and his mother were not the villains of the story. The real source of the problem was the father, yet he's the one people in the story seem least willing to hold accountable.