natty

People are masses of emotion

We Are All Trying Here is my favorite K-drama in a few years. It’s from the same writer as My Mister and My Liberation Notes. Park Hae-young may be my favorite writer. As an introvert, I always relate to the characters she writes. It feels like looking at my own reflection. They are always so deeply expressive but take you on a story that makes you feel.

This drama is really what the title is saying: we are all trying. We may find someone annoying, angry, rude, jealous, or any other emotion you can think of, but really they are battling their own thoughts every day and are trying their best.

Hwang Dong-man is the type of character you just want to have soju with and talk for hours about emotions that bring sadness, but also joy and dreams. I wanted to hug this character throughout the entire drama. I think it was in the first few episodes, but there was a scene where Dong-man talked about how surprised and happy he was that Eun-ah spoke to him at the train tracks. He said that he talks too much because sometimes all he hears is his own voice, and it makes him feel less lonely.

I felt connected to him because I also sometimes feel misunderstood. I tell stories and put on a mask to fit in. No one wants to be the melancholy melody in the room. He has some of the best sayings and quotes in this drama. One of my favorites is:

“I’m going to pull up the shiny truth from the very depths of my worthlessness. Look forward to my shiny story.”

What I like most about Dong-man is that he never gives up on being a screenwriter. Even in his 40s, he continues pursuing his dream and eventually succeeds. I feel that in this generation, if you fail or quit at something by 30, people often write you off. This story was really inspiring. It was even more inspiring that he stayed positive while dealing with the trauma of finding his brother attempting to take his own life twice.

I can’t decide who my favorite character was because I was also so attached to Byeon Eun-ah. She embodies so many of my emotions. There was a sadness to her that I felt completely synchronized with while watching every scene she was in.

She was desperately lonely. She only had her step grandmother and no one who truly listened to her or understood her. Everyone made assumptions because she didn’t talk much. They saw her as self-centered and rude, but really she was just trying to survive her trauma. When she was a little girl, her mother left her and her father passed away not long afterward. The feeling that no one was coming home to her, combined with that abandonment, left her with severe emotional wounds.

She would get nosebleeds whenever she felt attacked, afraid, or angry. Those moments felt like cries for help. Throughout the story, Eun-ah and Dong-man try to understand their emotions. They receive watches from a doctor that monitor their emotional states, helping them work through their trauma and uncover the roots of their pain.

They needed each other. They saved each other.

One thing I really enjoyed was that you could clearly feel the love they had for each other, but there were no kiss scenes. Somehow that made the relationship feel even more intimate.

Park Gyeong-se and Ko Hye-jin were two other characters I really enjoyed. At the beginning, I thought they were being too harsh on Dong-man, but eventually I realized they were struggling with their own problems.

Gyeong-se is constantly competing with Dong-man and feels worthless because he believes his dramas and creativity will never match Dong-man’s. They had a great friendship when they were younger because they were on equal in success. His first successful film was actually inspired by a dream Dong-man once shared, which left Gyeong-se feeling like it wasn’t truly his own story. But in reality, we need other people because they often inspire our ideas and creativity.

Hye-jin is Gyeong-se’s wife. I found their story very touching. She quit her job as a reporter because she wanted to be involved in the film industry. She read one of Gyeong-se’s scripts and fell in love with both the story and the man who wrote it. Together they rose through the industry as Hye-jin kept believing and supporting Gyeong-se.

As the drama progresses, however, their relationship begins to fall apart. Hye-jin fell in love with Gyeong-se’s creativity and imagination, but he falls into a creative slump. Later, he starts enjoying writing again while working with his female assistant writer. Hye-jin notices that spark returning and believes he may be developing feelings for the assistant in the same way he once developed feelings for her. She ultimately asks for a divorce, telling him that if writing makes him feel alive again, he should do whatever it takes to succeed.

Hwang Jin-man—how I cried for this man.

From what I understood, his daughter went missing. He used to be a poet, but now he spends his days drinking, attempting to take his own life, and working as a welder. Every word that comes out of his mouth hits you deeply.

His brother, Eun-ah, and Jang Mi-ran eventually help find his daughter through a social media post. It felt like he could finally release the trauma that had trapped him for so many years. His daughter was his whole heart.


Jang Mi-ran was another character I really enjoyed. She is the stepdaughter of Eun-ah’s mother. I loved seeing how two daughters could have completely different relationships with the same woman.

I also appreciated how both respected each other’s feelings toward their mother. Eun-ah chose to keep her distance while still working through years of abandonment issues, while Mi-ran viewed her stepmother as her hero and wanted to care for her no matter what.

I loved the relationship between Mi-ran and Eun-ah. They understood each other and truly listened. Sometimes just spending a night sharing a drink and listening to someone’s pain can make them feel less alone. Both women were lonely for different reasons, but they found comfort and light in each other.

There were many great characters in this drama, but the ones above were my favorites.

At the end, everyone watches Dong-man’s drama and breaks down in tears because they genuinely feel the story. The series concludes with everyone drinking together, dancing, laughing, and reconnecting. Friends happy for each other.

When we’re failing, it’s easy to become jealous of what other people have. But those same people may also be barely surviving themselves. We look at everything like a door and not a window.

Each character carried their own trauma and loneliness, but somehow this drama made me feel less burdened by both of those things.


Remember, we are all trying here. Check on the people you love, but also listen to those who hear nothing but their own echoes. Sometimes being heard can make all the difference.

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