Xiang Liu and Xiao Yao’s Story and Romance

 blabla100:

@kokuto

"But he isn't trading XY to Jing.  Jing specifically said, he wouldn't do that"

Jing said that, not XL. I don't remember their exact words, I will have to check to see if I find that scene  on YouTube to rewach it, but to me that whole discussion was full of subtleties and cover ups. 

It's here:

https://youtu.be/3tD-eieHXXg?si=nI0OkzxVh1qpCN_f&t=395

Yes, I said Jing said that.  But XL didn't offer to trade XY or give her up.  Jing thought XL was saying the opposite, that he was threatening to take XY away from him.

It's definitely a scene of nuances and gamesmanship and insinuations.

 Kokuto:

This is really lovely.  The last two lines ...  wow.

Now I'm wondering if Tong Hua had something to do with the posters?  I'll have to see if I can find the original weibo post.

@Windiaaa041293

Did the book cover (version 2013) include this Yearning poem or other lovesickness poem?

@Kokuto, you may check the folder made by @Windiaaa

 Kokuto:

This is really lovely.  The last two lines ...  wow.

Now I'm wondering if Tong Hua had something to do with the posters?  I'll have to see if I can find the original weibo post.

The poster's message is similar to the way TH named chapter tittles for the book LYF

 Kokuto:

It's here:

https://youtu.be/3tD-eieHXXg?si=nI0OkzxVh1qpCN_f&t=395

Yes, I said Jing said that.  But XL didn't offer to trade XY or give her up.  Jing thought XL was saying the opposite, that he was threatening to take XY away from him.

It's definitely a scene of nuances and gamesmanship and insinuations.

Oh thank you for the link! 

Again, it is a clear cut IMO. XL is offering XY to Jing în return for Jing's help. Either if by that he means giving her up or smoothing the way for Jing to have her, it doesn't really matter, since both options serve the same purpose. Jing plays the righfulness card on the surface, but he does agree to help XL, because after all he is a patethic human being, who knows that he can both keep his face while XL still agreeing to keep his part of the deal. That is my interpretation of that scene and I honestly fail to see any other. It is obvious from XL's hesitation when giving that paper to Jing too, the type of deal they made. 

@AH.

On the other hand, there are a lot of factors that lead me to sympathize with TSZ and XY's decision. I don't view it in such black and white terms. 

If there is an area that calls for black and white, right and wrong view, then it's the area of child abandonment and neglect. You and I have diametrically opposite views on this matter.  When you decide to take on the role of a parent, be it through biologically fathering/mothering a child or adopting, you have signed yourself up for a lifetime of loving, caring, protecting and guiding this young person into adulthood. Are there circumstances where a person can't do that, yes - but there is nothing in Jing and XY's circumstances at the end of the story that could reasonably justify their abandonment of a young child? Nothing but pure irresponsibility and selfishness.

 AH :

By the time TSJ was revived, the Tushan clan was stable and, according to Hu Zhen, TSZ was "good, very good". Instead of doing anything to disturb that situation (e.g., like trying to reclaim the position of Tushan clan leader for himself until TSZ was grown and ready to take over), TSJ decided to only leave TSZ a message.

He's such a coward that he doesn't even say hi to his child when he comes back from the dead before leaving this poor kid with this huge responsibility (that is his own) so that he can run off and play happy family with his new wife. Nice, real nice.

A stable situation of 7 years doesn't guarantee that it will remain stable. In a family like the Tushan clan, there are always factions, politics and power struggles at play. Jing, more than anyone should know how difficult it is to be the head of such a family - to deal with multiple elders imposing their wills onto you. Jing was a grown man of what 600-700 years? who was marked at birth to be the heir with hundreds of years worth of training and he struggled mightily to assert himself under his grandmother's and clan's rules, and yet, he's going to subject a child of barely 100 to this pressure cooker? Jing had left this child in a lion's den - if a power struggle breaks out, he will be used as a pawn in this power game. How is any of this justifiable? Don't tell me that Jing doesn't know this, we keep on being told of his vaunted intelligence.

 AH :

but I'm not sure that I would say that TSJ's decision demonstrated poor decision-making skills or complete heartlessness, and I'm not sure I'd say that it was a decision that he shouldn't have made.

I have no problem saying this: Jing demonstrated poor decision-making skills and judgment. And he was irresponsible and heartless in leaving his child in such a situation. Jing should not have done this. PERIOD.

 AH :

I'm sure it wasn't easy for TSJ to not see TSZ and to not continue in his role as TSZ's father-figure, and I'm sure TSZ would have preferred to have his uncle / father-figure back in his life. But TSZ had already spent 7 years living in a world where everyone thought that TSJ was dead. That was his new normal. The clan elders were handling the clan's affairs and TSZ had CX, Hu Zhen, Jing Ye and Hu Mao looking out for him. His situation wasn't ideal, but it seemed tolerable.

You give Jing more credit than I would. And yes, I'm sure poor TSZ would much prefer to have his father figure in his life instead of the family retainers. What kind of responsible parents would wake up after a 7-year coma and go, "Well a life without me is your new normal now, so see ya kid, I'm off with my new wife. Good luck to ya?" Wouldn't a normal, responsible, non-jackass of a father be trying to reunite with his child, and take back the burden and responsibility that his poor child had to bear in the 7 years without him? Again, these things are Jing's responsibilities, foisting them off onto his CHILD so he can be free is abhorrent. And Jing foisting off his parental responsibility onto the family's retainers is also abhorrent. Lastly, tolerable is a bloody low bar. What kind of parent would be OK with leaving their child in a tolerable position when they can make it more ideal? That's right, the kind of who's more interested in their happiness with their new spouse. Jackass!

 AH :

But on the other hand, TSJ being softhearted towards a family member in a way that hurt XY / failed to prioritize her seems like a complete repeat of all the earlier circumstances when he was softhearted towards TSH, his grandmother and FFYY in a way that hurt XY. And in that sense it would be the opposite of character growth.

Being a responsible parent is not being soft-hearted, it is you, carrying out your responsibilities as a parental figure. If Jing had accepted TSZ as his child and received the praise of being a good/kind/benevolent person for for this act, then he'd better carry out his responsibility and treat this child as his. If TSZ was biologically his, would Jing be making the same choice? And if he would, how would/should we view him??? If Jing's decision to abandon TSZ is seen as acceptable because TSZ isn't biologically his, then that says a lot about his character!

 AH :

But at the same time, I sympathize with TSJ and XY and everything they had gone through by that point. So many assassination attempts, brushes with death, and betrayals. I get why they chose to leave it all behind, even when that meant not returning TSJ to his role as TSZ's father figure.

Having sympathy and understanding the difficulty that Jing and XY are in does not mean that I will endorse or excuse their god-awful behaviour. Life throws crap at us all the time; how we respond to the crap shows our character. Jing and XY's response tells me that they are irresponsible and selfish. My sympathy is with the child who has limited decision-making ability, and who relies on the adults in his life to protect and care for him. Unfortunately for TSZ, his father figure is a love-addled asshat. 

 AH :

I'm a bit on the fence about having XY help TSJ raise TSZ. I do like the idea of XY getting to contribute to a child being spared from the feelings of abandonment that she experienced as a child. And I imagine XY would have been mentally prepared to play that kind of role for TSZ before her scheduled wedding to TSJ in chapter 42. But I hesitate a bit because I wouldn't want an ending that felt like it was trapping XY.

If XY doesn't want to be a stepmother then she shouldn't be with a man who has a child. And the fact that XY doesn't look askance at Jing for abandoning his child so that he can cater to her, when for a good chunk of the story she was extremely resentful towards her mother for "abandoning" her then she is incredibly self-absorbed with incredibly questionable values. And Ah Heng's situation was a lot more justifiable and understandable than Jing and XY's.

In summary, there are zip, zero, and zilch excuses or reasons that can justify Jing and XY's act of abandonment. So these two sick people and their sick relationship can take a long walk off a short pier. 

@HeadIntheClouds

Just reading your post makes my blood boil, Jing is such an a$$hole. XY is pretty messed up too, she should have known better for sure. 

 Kokuto:

Now I'm wondering if Tong Hua had something to do with the posters?  I'll have to see if I can find the original weibo post.

 windiaaa041293:

Vol 1 如初见 As When We First Met (Lost You Forever)

Back cover
长相思，长相思。若问相思甚了期，除非相见时。长相思，长相思。欲把相思说似谁，浅情人不知。……


Everlasting yearning, everlasting yearning. If asked when the yearning will end, it will be at the time we meet. Everlasting yearning, everlasting yearning. Whom do you wish your yearning to be given to, The one whose love is weak will not know....

TH said CX is the main lead of LYF. Did TH say that the title "eternal yearning" implies CX's yearning for XY? 

Now we see the the yearning line from the book cover is applied for XY's poster. Moreover, XY's theme song is also "eternal yearning" which was sung by Yang Zi in many public occasion. 

Thus, the book title "Eternal yearning"  is not only CX's lovesicknes but also XY's. Did XY have an eternal yearning for her husband Jing. Sorry, not!

Anyway, I forgot to ask if those posters are authentic and official by Tencent or drama production?