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Part 3 : A Book to Harm
Quotes:
"Xiao Yao snuck into Cao Yao Court and sat beside the Grand Emperor, peering at what he was doing. He smiled at her and kept on working."
*This quote sets the scene for Xiao Yao's interaction with her father, the Grand Emperor. It highlights their close relationship and Xiao Yao's curiosity about her father's activities.
"The Grand Emperor asked 'Have you learned the “Sheng Nong Book of Herbs” left by your mother?' Xiao Yao pointed to her head 'The Royal Mother said that was a bad thing so forced me to memorize it and then destroyed the manual.'"
*This dialogue reveals Xiao Yao's upbringing and her mother's influence on her education. It also hints at a mysterious aspect of her mother's past, adding depth to her character.
(pics above explaining the same to CX in ep.18)
"Xiao Yao walked over and flipped open a book, but it wasn’t a medical book like her dad suggested, but a book on how to harm others. Ah Nian’s push today reminded Xiao Yao that she can’t let her guard down!"
*This quote illustrates Xiao Yao's cunning and resourcefulness. Despite her father's suggestion to study medical texts, she chooses to explore darker subjects related to poisons and harm, showing her readiness to defend herself in the dangerous palace environment.
"Father and daughter, one sat on the throne working, the other rested on a pillow reading medical texts. This went on until late into the night when the Grand Emperor escorted Xiao Yao back to her residence before returning to his."
*This imagery emphasizes the bond between Xiao Yao and her father, depicting them both engaged in their respective pursuits. It also highlights the familial duty and care the Grand Emperor shows towards Xiao Yao, escorting her back to her residence at night.
Symbols:
Books and Knowledge:
Books symbolize knowledge and power in this passage. Xiao Yao's interaction with different types of books reflects her diverse interests and the breadth of her knowledge. While her father encourages her to study medical texts, Xiao Yao's choice to explore a book on harming others demonstrates her awareness of the darker aspects of palace life and her readiness to protect herself.
Poisons:
Poisons symbolize Xiao Yao's resourcefulness and survival instincts. Her research and experimentation with poisons serve as a means of self-defense and empowerment in the dangerous palace environment. Textual Analysis:
The passage skillfully portrays Xiao Yao's complex relationship with her father, the Grand Emperor, and her navigation of palace life. Through dialogue and imagery, it reveals the dynamics of their interactions and Xiao Yao's independent spirit.
Xiao Yao's defiance of societal norms and her readiness to explore darker subjects highlight her resilience and adaptability. Despite her privileged upbringing, she is not naive to the dangers of palace intrigue and actively seeks ways to protect herself.
The juxtaposition of Xiao Yao's academic pursuits with her interest in poisons adds depth to her character - It also hints at the darker undercurrents of palace life and the moral ambiguity of survival in such a cutthroat environment that Ah Nian is setting for her.
Xiao Yao's exploration of darker subjects related to poisons and harm serves multiple purposes within the narrative, including her readiness to defend herself in the dangerous palace environment.
****Let's delve deeper into the symbolic significance of her interest in poisons and how it relates to her relationships with Ah Nian and Xiang Liu:
Defense Mechanism and Protection:Toxicity to counter and deal with Toxicity
Xiao Yao's interest in poisons can be interpreted as a defense mechanism in the treacherous palace environment. By familiarizing herself with poisons and their effects, she is better equipped to protect herself from potential threats, including individuals like Ah Nian who may pose a danger to her.
Exploration of a Darker Side:
Additionally, Xiao Yao's fascination with poisons reflect her exploration of a darker aspect of herself. The act of studying poisons and their uses represents a departure from traditional moral boundaries and suggests a willingness to engage with darker, more sinister elements. This exploration of the darker side of her nature adds complexity to her character and underscores the moral ambiguity of survival in the palace.
Relationship with Ah Nian:
Xiao Yao's association of harm and darkness with Ah Nian highlights the threat she perceives from her sister. Ah Nian's aggression and hostility towards Xiao Yao serve as a catalyst for her interest in self-defense mechanisms such as poisons. By understanding and potentially utilizing poisons, Xiao Yao seeks to protect herself from the harm that Ah Nian represents.
Connection to Xiang Liu:
The mention of Xiang Liu in the context of harm and darkness adds another layer of complexity to Xiao Yao's exploration of poisons. Xiang Liu, with his formidable abilities and enigmatic nature, embodies a darker and sinister aspect of the world. Xiao Yao's sadness over not being able to share her latest poison with him stem from her will to get recognition of his affinity for such elements.
In summary,
Xiao Yao's interest in poisons serves as both a means of self-defense and a symbolic exploration of darker themes within the narrative. It reflects her readiness to confront the dangers of palace life while also delving into the complexities of her relationships with characters like Ah Nian and Xiang Liu. Through this exploration, Xiao Yao's character is further developed, showcasing her resilience, resourcefulness, and willingness to navigate the moral gray areas of her world. Toxic to counter toxic.
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Part4:
Mirror
Interaction with the Grand Emperor:
Xiao Yao's conversation with the Grand Emperor about the mirror provides insight into her emotional state and her relationship with her father. The Grand Emperor's observation of Xiao Yao's candid honesty highlights their close bond and his understanding of her character. Furthermore, the Grand Emperor's acknowledgment of Xiao Yao's perceived cold-heartedness and rationality compared to her passionate mother sheds light on Xiao Yao's internal conflict and her struggle to reconcile her emotions with her outward demeanor.
This interaction adds depth to the analysis by revealing the dynamics of Xiao Yao's relationship with her father and how it influences her coping mechanisms. It showcases the mutual understanding and acceptance between them.
Coping Mechanism from Captivity:
The mirror is a symbolic continuation of coping mechanisms developed during Xiao Yao's past captivity. Just as humor and defiance were used to endure captivity with the Nine-tailed fox and the snake, Xiao Yao now employs similar strategies through the irreverent depictions in the mirror to transform traumatic symbols from her past.
Narrative of Triumph:
The irreverent depictions in the mirror, serve as a narrative of triumph over past traumas. By mocking and defying the figure that once tormented her, Xiao Yao reclaims a sense of power and control over her own narrative, turning her past experiences into sources of strength rather than sources of fear.
Distraction from Challenges:
While the irreverent depictions offer a form of amusement and defiance, they also serve as a distraction from the deeper emotional challenges Xiao Yao faces, such as missing her mother and grappling with loneliness. The mirror provides a temporary reprieve from these complexities, allowing Xiao Yao to channel her feelings into playfulness rather than confronting their full weight. Instead of facing her internal conflict directly, she retreat for fun into the mirror's reflections.
As we see, in this context Emperor's acknowledgment of Xiao Yao's perceived cold-heartedness and rationality compared to her passionate mother sheds light on Xiao Yao's internal conflict and her struggle to reconcile her emotions with her outward demeanor.//In this scene his perception of Xiao Yao reflect metaphorically in the mirror.
Part5:
Intronisation of the Elder Princess
Detailed Literary Analysis with Quotes, Symbols, and Textual Analysis:______________
In this passage, the climactic ceremony at the summit altar serves as a pivotal moment for Xiao Yao, marked by complex emotions and interpersonal dynamics.
Symbolism of the Summit Altar:
The summit altar constructed from white jade symbolizes purity and solemnity, reflecting the significance of the occasion.
The 99 steps leading to the top represent a journey or ascent, both physically and symbolically, underscoring Xiao Yao's transition and her return to prominence.
The peach blossoms embroidered on Xiao Yao's robe evoke themes of renewal and beauty amidst adversity, adding a layer of symbolism to her appearance.
Interpersonal Dynamics:
Ah Nian's anticipation of disaster and Zhuan Xu's calm expectancy highlight the tension surrounding Xiao Yao's return and its implications for the royal family.
Jing's anticipation and nervousness reveal his conflicted feelings towards Xiao Yao, showcasing the complexity of their relationship.
The Grand Emperor's observations and interactions with Xiao Yao further deepen the familial dynamics, revealing his concern for both Xiao Yao and Ah Nian.
Xiao Yao's Internal Struggle:
Xiao Yao's aloof demeanor and inner turmoil are evident in her outward appearance and internal monologue, reflecting her reluctance and discomfort with the ceremony.
Despite her outward composure, Xiao Yao's inner thoughts reveal her struggle to maintain a facade of propriety and detachment, underscoring her internal conflict.
The Grand Emperor's Concern:
The Grand Emperor's conversation with Xiao Yao elucidates his understanding of the familial dynamics and his concern for the relationship between Xiao Yao and Ah Nian.
His admission of regret and genuine sadness underscores the weight of his responsibilities and the complexities of familial relationships within the royal household.
Symbolism of the Cloud Carriage:
The cloud carriage represents a transition or passage, symbolizing Xiao Yao's return to the palace and the conclusion of the ceremony.
Xiao Yao's exhaustion and the Grand Emperor's concern during their conversation in the cloud carriage reflect the emotional toll of the ceremony and the underlying familial tensions.
Symbolism of the Summit Altar:
"The entire summit altar was constructed from white jade and consisted of 99 steps to the top, starting out wide and narrowing as it got to the top. Both sides of the steps were ringed with Gao Xing ceremonial guards who looked very imposing."
This description of the summit altar constructed from white jade symbolizes purity and solemnity, emphasizing the significance of the ceremony.
Interpersonal Dynamics:
"Ah Nian was smiling as she waited for disaster to happen."
Ah Nian's anticipation of disaster reveals the tension surrounding Xiao Yao's return and hints at potential conflicts within the royal family.
"Zhuan Xu was calm yet expectant – this moment wasn’t just Xiao Yao’s coming back, it also marked his imminent return."
Zhuan Xu's calm yet expectant demeanor reflects his egoistic thought on his empowerment, seeing Xiao Yao's return as a prelude to his own rise to power.
Jing's Emotions:
"Jing was filled with anticipation. He wanted countless times to see Xiao Yao’s true form and now he was finally going to see her. But even more nervous was standing with other guests watching from afar, making him feel he was so distant from her."
Jing's anticipation and nervousness demonstrate his longing for closeness with Xiao Yao, despite feeling emotionally distant from her amidst the crowd of spectators. It marks his loneliness while in the crowd, and the metaphoric distance he have to overcome.
The Grand Emperor's Concern:
"The Grand Emperor sighed loudly 'This life, I’ve used everything I have to exchange for everything I want. I have regrets but will still do it again. The only thing I worry about is the two of you sisters. If you can love and accept each other sincerely and look out for each other, then I will have nothing else to worry about.'"
The Grand Emperor's admission of regret and genuine sadness reveals his concern for the relationship between Xiao Yao and Ah Nian, highlighting the weight of his responsibilities and the complexities of familial relationships within the royal household.
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Through these quotes and their respective analysis, we gain deeper insight into the symbolism, interpersonal dynamics, and emotional nuances present in this passage.
contrasting perspectives of Jing and Zhuan Xu regarding Xiao Yao's ascension to the role of Elder Princess:
Jing's Perspective:
"Jing was filled with anticipation. He wanted countless times to see Xiao Yao’s true form and now he was finally going to see her."
Jing's anticipation reflects his genuine excitement and eagerness to witness Xiao Yao's transformation into the Elder Princess. This suggests that he sees this moment as a significant and positive milestone, indicating his admiration, longing and respect for Xiao Yao's character and abilities.
Zhuan Xu's Perspective:
"Zhuan Xu was calm yet expectant – this moment wasn’t just Xiao Yao’s coming back, it also marked his imminent return."
Zhuan Xu's calm yet expectant demeanor suggests a more calculated and self-centered perspective. He views Xiao Yao's ascension as a step towards his own empowerment, indicating that he may perceive her new role primarily through the lens of its implications for his own political ambitions.
In summary, while Jing views Xiao Yao's ascension with anticipation and genuine enthusiasm, Zhuan Xu approaches the situation with a more detached and strategic mindset, focusing on its broader implications for his own goals. These differing perspectives underscore the complexity of their relationships with Xiao Yao and their individual motivations within the story.
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Part 6:
Jing's demand for appointement with XY to Zhuan Xu.
(notice ep19, wording is "May I...", while in the koala's version it's "I want to see Xiao Yao", as in chinese version, to wich i'll stick) :
玱玹悄悄向璟道谢,璟突然说:“我想见小夭。”
Jing's demand for appointement with XY to Zhuan Xu.
This passage provides insights into the dynamics between Zhuan Xu, Jing, and their peers, as well as the anticipation surrounding Xiao Yao's character:
Peer Pressure and Expectations:
- "Xing Yue and Yi Yang grabbed Zhuan Xu and wheedled 'Call your cousin out. We want to meet her.'"
- This quote highlights the peer pressure Zhuan Xu faces from his friends, who are eager to meet Xiao Yao. It reflects the curiosity and anticipation surrounding her, suggesting that she is a figure of interest and speculation among their social circle.
Zhuan Xu's Reluctance:
- "He sighed 'She has a very strange personality. I doubt she’ll be willing to come out.'"
- Zhuan Xu's reluctance to introduce Xiao Yao underscores the complexities of her character and their relationship. It hints that Zhuan Xu feel protective of her and is aware of her reservations about social interaction-By describing her personality as "strange," Zhuan Xu implies that Xiao Yao's actions or preferences may not always align with societal norms or expectations. This characterization suggests that Xiao Yao is independent-minded, unpredictable, and rather unconventional in her behavior.
- While he have some understanding of her character based on their relationship, he can't be certain of how she will respond in every situation. Therefore, his doubt about Xiao Yao's willingness to participate in social interactions is based on his understanding of her tendencies and preferences.
Jing's Determination:
- "Jing said 'I want to see Xiao Yao.'"
- Jing's desire to meet Xiao Yao demonstrates his earnestness and determination. It suggests a personal connection or curiosity about her, separate from the expectations of their peers.
- It's a straightforward statement.
- His directness indicates that he's not swayed by external influences but rather follows his own motivations and desires in seeking a meeting with Xiao Yao. This statement underscores Jing's individual agency and highlights the importance of his personal connection to Xiao Yao.
Zhuan Xu's Reaction:
- "The expression in Zhuan Xu’s eyes changed and he was silent for a moment before smiling 'I can only pass word for you. She decides whether or not to see you.'"
- Zhuan Xu's reaction to Jing's request indicates a shift in his demeanor, suggesting that he may have conflicting emotions or concerns about Jing's intentions. His offer to relay the message to Xiao Yao underscores his role as an intermediary between them.
Jing's Departure:
- "Jing bowed 'If you please' and then turned and disappeared from the banquet."
- Jing's departure reflects his determination to see Xiao Yao and his willingness to take action to make it happen. It suggests a sense of urgency or importance attached to their potential meeting.
Jing's Motivations:
Jing's desire to meet Xiao Yao stems from a genuine curiosity and interest in her. He expresses a personal longing to see her, separate from the expectations or pressures of their social circle.
This suggests that Jing have developed a unique connection with Xiao Yao.
Assertiveness: Jing's determination to see Xiao Yao reflects his assertive nature and willingness to take action. Despite the potential challenges or obstacles, he is resolute in his pursuit of meeting her, demonstrating his commitment and determination.
Desire for Connection: Jing's decision to seek out Xiao Yao indicates a desire for connection and closeness. He hope to establish a meaningful relationship with her, driven by a genuine interest in getting to know her better.
Overall, Zhuan Xu's motivations revolve around a sense of responsibility and protectiveness towards Xiao Yao mixed with conflicting emotion, as he also need Jing for his own path to powership.
Meanwhile Jing's motivations stem from curiosity to see her again, assertiveness, and the genuine desire for connection . Their individual motivations drive their actions and interactions, shaping the dynamics within the narrative and potentially leading to significant developments in their relationships with Xiao Yao and each other.
CX still smiling...
As he have TSJ in his back, the smile is complitly erased from his face.
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Part 7:
Extract:
Zhuan Xu had a servant deliver the news that “Shi Qi is waiting for you outside the dragon bone prison”. Xiao Yao felt happiness mixed with nervousness, it was a feeling she couldn’t fully understand.
She finished her meal, washed up, and then casually ordered the maids “I want to change to go meet a guest. Pick me a pretty outfit.”
It was the first time the maids heard the Princess ask to dress up nicely and they all perked up in excitement and pulled out all sorts of pretty outfits for the Princess to choose from.
The maids conferred and decided on three to pick from. Xiao Yao wanted one that didn’t have a cinched waist and was told she would look like she was pregnant under the moonlight.
Another maid said “Princess, we can’t wear these outfits even if we wanted because our waist isn’t small enough, legs aren’t long enough, top isn’t pretty enough. You look so pretty in it, why don’t you wear it?”
Xiao Yao asked “I really look nice in it?”
All of the maids nodded in unison and Xiao Yao thought about how this was her first time meeting Jing as a girl and decided to go with pretty over comfortable.
Xiao Yao picked a white and green robe and the maids did her hair with a bell hair pin so it whistled as she walked. She took a few steps and felt tired but the maids were gasping in joy and clapping “Princess, go see the person now. We promise he will never ever be able to forget you.”
Xiao Yao’s face was burning “What are you guys talking about? I’m just going to see a regular friend.”
All of the maids controlled their smiles – yup, just a friend, a regular friend who was so regular that the Princess would spend all that time dressing herself up.
Xiao Yao took the cloud carriage down the mountain and got off to walk the rest of the way. It was a full moon out and Xiao Yao slowly walked until she could hear the sound of the waves crashing against the cliff.
She saw a man standing on the rocks, he was facing the ocean and quietly waiting. It was unclear how long he waited, it was unclear how much longer he’ll continue to wait.
The person waiting for her was Ye Shi Qi.
Xiao Yao felt all her frustration slowly disappear until all that was left was joy and nervousness.
Xiao Yao walked quietly towards him.
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Going to appointement
As mentioned previously, this whole scene in the drama version in ep.19 is represented through CX point of view. Marking his turmoil with music added.
Xiao Yao - Pampering herself for her appointement with Tushan Jing
Anticipation and Nervousness:
Xiao Yao experiences a mix of happiness and nervousness as she prepares to meet Ye Shi Qi. This blend of emotions signifies the significance of the encounter and hints at Xiao Yao's emotional investment in their relationship. The text portrays her feelings as something she "couldn’t fully understand," adding depth to her internal turmoil.
Symbolism of Dressing Up:
Xiao Yao's decision to dress up nicely for the occasion symbolizes her desire to make a good impression and hints at her growing feelings for Ye Shi Qi. The maids' excitement and insistence that she looks beautiful in the outfit highlight the significance of her appearance in shaping her confidence and self-image.
Contrast between Inner and Outer Perception:
There's a contrast between Xiao Yao's internal feelings of nervousness and the outward perception of her as confident and beautiful. While Xiao Yao feel uncertain internally, externally, she presents herself as poised and elegant. This dissonance between inner emotions and outward appearance adds complexity to her character and underscores the intricacies of human emotions.
The Encounter:
The description of Xiao Yao's approach to Ye Shi Qi builds suspense and anticipation, highlighting the importance of this meeting for both characters. The imagery of Xiao Yao walking towards him against the backdrop of the moonlit night and crashing waves evokes a sense of drama and heightened emotion, setting the stage for a significant interaction between the two characters.
Overall, this passage delves into Xiao Yao's emotional landscape as she prepares to meet Ye Shi Qi, portraying her internal conflict and anticipation with vivid imagery and symbolism. It sets the stage for a pivotal moment in their relationship
the significance of this moment lies in its novelty – it marks the first time Xiao Yao has expressed a desire to dress up nicely, signaling a shift in her demeanor and her perception of herself.
This departure from her usual habits suggests a newfound sense of self-awareness or a change in priorities.
For the maids, who are familiar with Xiao Yao's usual preferences and routines, this unexpected request prompts excitement and eagerness to assist her. The fact that they all "perked up in excitement" underscores the rarity of Xiao Yao's request and emphasizes its importance in the context of her life.
This moment symbolizes a potential turning point in Xiao Yao's personal growth or emotional journey. It may indicate a desire to present herself differently, to explore new facets of her identity, or to prepare for a significant encounter with Ye Shi Qi.
Xiao Yao's question "I really look nice in it?" further emphasizes the significance of this moment. It reflects her uncertainty and even a sense of vulnerability as she ventures into unfamiliar territory.
By seeking validation from her maids about her appearance, Xiao Yao demonstrates a degree of self-consciousness and a desire for reassurance. This question reveals her insecurities and highlights her need for external affirmation, especially in matters relating to her appearance.
Additionally, Xiao Yao's inquiry suggests a departure from her usual demeanor of self-assurance and independence. It portrays her in a more vulnerable light, showcasing a side of her character that is not often seen - as her acting womanly for a man to meet in a place crowded with her maids.
Xiao Yao's face burning further underscores her internal turmoil and emotional intensity in this moment. The physical sensation of heat on her face symbolizes her heightened emotions and nervousness as she prepares to meet Ye Shi Qi.
The phrase "face was burning" suggests a blush or flush, indicating a rush of blood to her cheeks, which is a common physiological response to embarrassment, excitement, or anxiety. In this context, it conveys Xiao Yao's embarrassment at the attention she is receiving from her maids and their teasing remarks about her appearance.
Moreover, her burning face also signify a sense of self-consciousness about her decision to dress up and the implications it may have for her meeting with Ye Shi Qi.
It reflects her awareness of the significance of this encounter and the anticipation she feels about the outcome.
In original chinese text:
在这里等她的是叶十七。
小夭心里的那些恼怒渐渐地消失了,只余了喜悦和紧张。
小夭越发放轻了脚步,悄悄地走近他。
Translation:
The anger in Xiaoyao's heart gradually disappeared, leaving only joy and nervousness.
Xiaoyao walked softer and lighter, approaching him quietly.
Koala: Xiao Yao felt all her frustration slowly disappear until all that was left was joy and nervousness.
Xiao Yao walked quietly towards him.
=> In the first version: "The anger in Xiaoyao's heart gradually disappeared, leaving only joy and nervousness," the focus is on the emotional transition within Xiaoyao. It highlights the gradual shift from negative emotions (anger) to positive ones (joy and nervousness). The emphasis is on Xiaoyao's internal state and how it evolves over time.
In the second version: "Xiao Yao felt all her frustration slowly disappear until all that was left was joy and nervousness. Xiao Yao walked quietly towards him," the language used suggests a more immediate and complete transformation of emotions. The word "frustration" is used instead of "anger," indicating a broader emotional state encompassing more than just anger. Additionally, the phrase "felt all her frustration slowly disappear" implies a more sudden change compared to the gradual disappearance of anger in the first version. The action of walking quietly towards him follows directly after this emotional transformation, indicating a sense of resolution and purpose in Xiaoyao's demeanor.
In the second version, the phrase "Xiao Yao felt all her frustration slowly disappear until all that was left was joy and nervousness" implies a significant emotional release for Xiao Yao. The word "frustration" suggests a broader range of negative emotions beyond just anger, including feelings of impatience. As these negative emotions dissipate, they are replaced by feelings of joy and nervousness, which can be seen as more positive and anticipatory.
This emotional transformation indicates a sense of resolution in Xiao Yao's demeanor. The removal of frustration suggests that she has found a way to reconcile any internal conflicts or uncertainties she had before meeting Ye Shi Qi. The presence of joy and nervousness reflects her anticipation and excitement at seeing him, suggesting that she has resolved any doubts or hesitations about meeting him. This sense of resolution gives Xiao Yao a clearer sense of purpose as she approaches Ye Shi Qi, indicating that she is more confident and focused in her actions. Overall, this emotional journey illustrates Xiao Yao's growth and readiness to face whatever lies ahead in her encounter with Ye Shi Qi.
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Part 8 :
Ah Nian- The one who felt it would be best if a beast came and hurt her.
Chinese original version full extract of this Ah Nian-XL part:
http://m.xsbiquge.la/book/36337/19812272/2.html
Translation in engl. below and full analyisis in next post.
兽一般发出轰鸣声,往常她早就害怕了,可今夜她不觉得害怕,甚至觉得最好真有一只怪兽出来,反正父王和哥哥有了小夭,他们都不再关心她。她觉得最好她被怪兽咬成重伤,奄奄一息时,父王和哥哥才找到她。他们痛苦自责内疚,可是已经晚了!阿念从幻想父王和哥哥在发现要失去她的痛苦中得到了些许报复的快感。
又一波浪潮涌来,一个白衣白发、戴着银色面具的男子坐在浪潮上,微笑地看着阿念,柔声说:“很痛苦吗?你的父亲和哥哥都抛弃了你。”
阿念认出了他,是那个和小六一起绑架过她的九命相柳。也许因为上次所有的坏事都是小六做的,相柳给阿念的印象并不坏,阿念很紧张,却并不害怕。
阿念问:“你怎么在这里?”
相柳笑,“你说呢?整个大荒都在谈论高辛大王姬,我自然也有点好奇,所以来凑个热闹。”
又是小夭,又是小夭!阿念重重哼了一声。
相柳微笑着说:“如果没有她,你仍是高辛独一无二的王姬,是父王唯一的女儿,哥哥唯一的妹妹,可是她莫名其妙地跑了出来,夺走了你的一切,难道你不想报复她吗?”
阿念紧咬着唇,不吭声。她知道她不该和相柳做交易,哥哥曾恼怒地骂过他是魔头,可是……这天下没有做不成的交易,只有还不够分量的诱惑。
阿念挣扎着说:“我是恨她,可我没想让她死,我只是想一切都恢复到以前。”
相柳柔声说:“我承认我有可能想杀轩辕的王子,但绝不会杀高辛的王姬,我们神农义军绝不想得罪高辛王。”
阿念知道,所以她并不怕他。
相柳凝视着阿念的眼睛,温柔地提议:“你觉得好好折磨她一番,却不取她的性命,怎么样?”
阿念慢慢地点了下头。
相柳笑,“你真是个善良的女孩子,你的父王和哥哥应该更偏爱你才对。”
阿念觉得这么长时间以来,终于听到了一句顺心的话,她问:“怎么才能给她一个狠狠的教训?”
相柳说:“只要你能把她引出来,不要被人察觉,剩下的事情交给我。”
阿念问:“你为什么要帮我?你想要我帮你做什么?”
相柳微笑着说:“你是高辛王姬,什么都不缺,难得有一件我能为你效劳的事,我当然很乐意。你也知道我们神农义军的处境,如果日后有可能,希望王姬能帮我一次。”
阿念笑问:“你都不要我发誓,你不怕我反悔吗?”
相柳笑看着她,温柔又郑重地说:“我相信你。”
阿念甜甜地笑起来,“好!你帮我狠狠教训她一番,我日后帮你一次。”
相柳把一枚贝壳递给阿念,“把她引到海上,捏碎这个,我就会赶到。”
相柳把一枚贝壳递给阿念,“把她引到海上,捏碎这个,我就会赶到。”
阿念收好了贝壳,策玄鸟返回。
小夭一边喜悦地眺望着礁岩上的人影,一边忐忑地走着。突然,一枚小石子砸到她背上,小夭回身,看到阿念远远地站着,冲她挥了挥手,好像要她过去。小夭朝着阿念走过去,阿念却一转身,消失在了树丛中。
小夭蹙眉,回头望了一眼海边,循着阿念消失的方向追了上去。
阿念的身影在树林中时隐时现,她自小在五神山长大,远比小夭更熟悉五神山,她的灵力又比小夭高很多,只要她想,甩掉小夭很容易。小夭已经看出来阿念在故意逗引她,不过,她倒要看看阿念究竟想干什么。
她们从树林里的小道穿过,来到了山的另一面,阿念站在海边的悬崖上冲小夭挥手。
小夭慢慢地走过去,“你想干什么?”
阿念从头到脚地仔细打量了小夭一番,表情十分复杂。小夭也在打量阿念,猜不透阿念想做什么,就算阿念把她从悬崖上推下去,也摔不死她。
阿念捏碎了贝壳,突然向小夭冲了过来,小夭叹气,“你不是真想把我推下去吧?”她想闪避逃开,阿念用冰剑封锁住小夭的退路,站在了小夭背后。
阿念诡秘地说:“你猜对了!”
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Anian sat with her knees crossed, watching the waves coming from all directions and breaking around her, roaring like a monster. Normally, she would have been scared, but tonight she He didn't feel scared, and even thought it would be better if a monster came out. Anyway, his father and brother had Xiaoyao, and they no longer cared about her. She thought it would be best if she was bitten by a monster and seriously injured, and her father and brother found her when she was dying. They blame themselves and feel guilty, but it's too late! A-Nian got some pleasure from imagining her father and brother's pain of losing her.
Another wave came, and a man with white clothes and white hair and a silver mask sat on the wave.
He looked at Anian with a smile and said softly: "Is it painful? Your father and brother have abandoned you."
Ah Nian recognized him as the Nine-Life Xiang Liu who kidnapped her together with Xiao Liu. Perhaps because Xiaoliu was responsible for all the bad things last time, Xiang Liu didn't have a bad impression on Ah Nian. Ah Nian was nervous, but not afraid.
A Nian asked: "Why are you here?"
Xiang Liu smiled, "What do you think? The whole wilderness is talking about Princess Gaoxin. Naturally, I am a little curious, so I came to join in the fun."
It’s Xiaoyao again, it’s Xiaoyao again! A Nian snorted heavily.
Xiang Liu smiled and said: "Without her, you would still be Gaoxin's unique Wang Ji, your father's only daughter, and your brother's only sister. But she ran out inexplicably and took away everything from you. Don't you want to To take revenge on her?"
A Nian bit her lip tightly and remained silent. She knew she shouldn't make a deal with Xiang Liu. Her brother had angrily called him a devil, but... there was no deal that couldn't be made in this world, only temptations that weren't strong enough.
Ah Nian struggled and said: "I hate her, but I don't want her to die. I just want everything to return to before."
Xiang Liu said softly: "I admit that I may want to kill the prince of Xuanyuan, but I will never kill the Wang Ji of Gaoxin. We Shennong Rebels never want to offend King Gaoxin."
A Nian knew that, so she was not afraid of him.
Xiang Liu stared into A Nian's eyes and suggested gently: "What do you think about torturing her but not taking her life?"
A Nian nodded slowly.
Xiang Liu smiled, "You are really a kind girl. Your father and brother should prefer you."
A-Nian felt that she had finally heard something satisfying after such a long time, so she asked, "How can I teach her a harsh lesson?"
Xiang Liu said: "As long as you can lure her out without being noticed, leave the rest to me."
A Nian asked: "Why do you want to help me? What do you want me to help you with?"
Xiang Liu smiled and said: "You are Wang Ji of Gaoxin. You have nothing. It is rare that I can do something for you. Of course I am very happy. You also know the situation of our Shennong Rebel Army. If possible in the future, I hope Wang Ji Can you help me once."
A Nianxiao asked: "You don't even want me to swear, aren't you afraid that I will regret it?"
Xiang Liu looked at her with a smile and said softly and solemnly: "I believe you."
A Nian smiled sweetly, "Okay! Help me teach her a lesson, and I'll help you again in the future."
Xiang Liu handed a shell to A Nian, "Lead her to the sea, crush this, and I will arrive."
A Nian put away the shells and Ce Xuanniao returned.
Xiaoyao looked at the figures on the rocks with joy while walking nervously. Suddenly, a pebble hit her back. Xiaoyao turned around and saw Anian standing far away. He waved to her as if asking her to come over. Xiaoyao walked towards Anian, but Anian turned around and disappeared into the trees.
Xiaoyao frowned, looked back at the seaside, and chased after Anian in the direction where he disappeared.
A Nian's figure disappears and appears in the woods. She has grown up in Wushen Mountain since she was a child. She is far more familiar with Wushen Mountain than Xiao Yao. Her spiritual power is much higher than Xiao Yao. As long as she wants to, it will be easy to get rid of Xiao Yao. easy. Xiaoyao could already tell that A-Nian was deliberately teasing her, but she wanted to see what A-Nian wanted to do.
They passed through the path in the woods and came to the other side of the mountain. Anian stood on the cliff by the sea and waved to Xiaoyao.
Xiaoyao walked over slowly, "What do you want to do?"
A-Nian looked at Xiaoyao carefully from head to toe, with a very complicated expression. Xiaoyao was also sizing up A-Nian and couldn't figure out what A-Nian wanted to do. Even if A-Nian pushed her off the cliff, he wouldn't be able to kill her.
Ah Nian crushed the shell and suddenly rushed towards Xiao Yao. Xiao Yao sighed, "You really want to push me down, do you?" She wanted to dodge and escape, but Ah Nian blocked Xiao Yao's escape route with an ice sword and stood there. Behind Xiaoyao.
Anian said cryptically: "You guessed it right!"
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Symbolika1:Part 8 :
Ah Nian- The one who felt it would be best if a beast came and hurt her.
The one who felt it would be best if a beast came and hurt her.
This passage delves into Ah Nian's complex emotions and her encounter with Xiang Liu, revealing her inner turmoil and his manipulation.
Ah Nian's Vulnerability:
The opening of the passage exposes Ah Nian's vulnerability and sense of abandonment by her family. She harbors thoughts of self-harm, feeling that her father and brother no longer care about her. This vulnerability makes her susceptible to manipulation by external forces, as she seeks comfort and validation from elsewhere.
Xiang Liu's Manipulation:
Xiang Liu's arrival exacerbates Ah Nian's feelings of resentment towards Xiao Yao. He capitalizes on her vulnerability by planting seeds of revenge in her mind. He subtly encourages her to seek retribution against Xiao Yao for supposedly usurping her place in the family hierarchy. Xiang Liu's manipulation is evident in his words, where he subtly stokes Ah Nian's resentment while offering himself as a means of enacting revenge.
Ah Nian's Internal Struggle:
Ah Nian's internal conflict is palpable as she grapples with her hatred towards Xiao Yao and her reluctance to resort to extreme measures. Despite her animosity towards Xiao Yao, she hesitates to wish harm upon her. This internal struggle reflects Ah Nian's underlying moral compass and the complexity of her character. She ultimately desires a return to the past, where familial harmony prevailed, rather than seeking vengeance.
Xiang Liu's Influence:
Xiang Liu's influence over Ah Nian is evident in her eventual agreement to cooperate with him. Despite her initial reservations, she succumbs to his persuasion, agreeing to lure Xiao Yao into a trap. This underscores Xiang Liu's skill in manipulation and his ability to exploit the vulnerabilities of others for his own gain.
Symbolism of the Clam Shell:
The clam shell serves as a symbolic object representing Ah Nian's complicity in Xiang Liu's scheme. By accepting the shell and agreeing to use it to lure Xiao Yao, Ah Nian becomes complicit in Xiang Liu's plans. The act of smashing the shell signifies Ah Nian's descent into darkness and her willingness to betray her family ties for the sake of revenge.
In first conclusion, this passage delves into the themes of vulnerability, manipulation, and revenge, exploring the intricate dynamics between Ah Nian and Xiang Liu. It showcases Ah Nian's inner turmoil and moral conflict, while highlighting Xiang Liu's cunning and ability to exploit others for his own purposes.
Extracts:
One instance of this manipulation is when Xiang Liu mentions, "But she randomly showed up and took everything from you." By framing Xiao Yao as the one responsible for Ah Nian's perceived loss, he deepens Ah Nian's resentment and plants the idea of seeking retribution.
Additionally, Xiang Liu subtly offers himself as a solution to Ah Nian's desire for revenge, stating, "All you need to do is lure her out and not be detected. I’ll handle the rest." This offer positions him as a powerful ally who can help Ah Nian achieve her goal, further enticing her to act on her feelings of animosity.
Furthermore, Xiang Liu's manipulation is evident in his assurance to Ah Nian that he would never harm Gao Xing's Princess, stating, "I confess I might kill Xuan Yuan’s Prince, but I will never kill Gao Xing’s Princess." This reassurance serves to manipulate Ah Nian into trusting him and going along with his plans, despite her initial reservations.
Let's get deeper:
Ah Nian as a pawn:
Xiang Liu's manipulation of Ah Nian underscores his cunning nature and his willingness to exploit others for his own gain. His subtle encouragement of revenge reflects his desire to sow discord and chaos, furthering his own agenda within the story as he demonstrates a keen ability to recognize and exploit vulnerability, using Ah Nian's feelings of abandonment and resentment to manipulate her into doing his bidding. This highlights Xiang Liu's skill in psychological manipulation and his willingness to use others as pawns to achieve his goals.
Xiang Liu's interaction with Ah Nian reflects his complex morality and ambiguous motives. While he presents himself as an ally to Ah Nian, offering to help her seek revenge against Xiao Yao, his true intentions remain in the dark. Despite his assurance that he would not harm Gao Xing's Princess, there is an underlying sense of ambiguity and danger in his words.
Simply putted: Xiang Liu's behavior in this passage is unhealthy, both in terms of his mental state and his moral compass.
Firstly, his willingness to manipulate Ah Nian's emotions and manipulate her into seeking revenge against Xiao Yao reflects a certain moral ambiguity and lack of empathy. Instead of addressing the root causes of Ah Nian's feelings of abandonment and resentment, he capitalizes on them for his own purposes, which is indicative of a manipulative and potentially unhealthy mindset.
Secondly, Xiang Liu's apparent fixation on revenge and his involvement in orchestrating a potentially harmful situation for Xiao Yao present a level of obsession or instability. His willingness to involve himself in such schemes, as well as his use of subtle manipulation tactics, are signs of psychological unhealthiness and moral decay.
His behavior reflects a deeply unhealthy mindset characterized by a lack of empathy and a willingness to manipulate others for personal gain. By encouraging Ah Nian to seek revenge against Xiao Yao, he perpetuates a cycle of resentment and hostility that ultimately serves his own agenda.
Furthermore, Xiang Liu's involvement in orchestrating harm against Xiao Yao reveals a disturbing disregard for the well-being of others and a willingness to engage in morally questionable actions. His apparent fixation on revenge and his use of subtle manipulation of a vulnerable and emotionally pained young woman, tactics suggest a character who is morally bankrupt and psychologically unstable.
His behavior reflects a deeply unhealthy mindset that adds complexity and depth to his portrayal in the narrative, while encouraging readers to consider the moral and psychological implications of Xiang Liu's behavior as follow:
A person who takes advantage of vulnerable individuals is often referred to as a "predator" or an "exploiter." These terms describe someone who manipulates or exploits others for their own gain, particularly when those individuals are in a weakened or vulnerable state.
a person who looks for other people in order to use, control, or harm them in some way.
Ref: https://www.britannica.com/dictionary/predator#:~:text=%3A%20a%20person%20who%20looks%20for,corporate%20predator%20acquiring%20business%20rivals
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This passage depicts a deeply unhealthy and concerning situation. It portrays a young girl, Ah Nian, feeling wrongly neglected and abandoned by her family, leading her to consider self-harm and to seek revenge on another individual, Xiao Yao.
Ah Nian's feelings of neglect and abandonment by her family are troubling. Her desire for self-harm and the belief that her family would only regret her injury or worst, when it's too late is indicative of a severe inner pain. These thoughts and emotions are deeply concerning. Xiao Yao felt them, and is willing to do her best to help her overcome them as seen in the scene just before in the drama ep19 in a discussion with her father, related to her sister:
The power dynamic between Xiang Liu and Ah Nian is clearly imbalanced, with Xiang Liu taking advantage of Ah Nian's vulnerability and emotional distress. Moreover, in this context extorting a promises is pushing further the red button ON .
I will conclude this analysis and exploration , based on the behavior described in the passage, that Xiang Liu's actions are indicative of traits commonly associated with a personality disorder, such as antisocial personality disorder (ASPD) or narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) .
1. Manipulative and Exploitative Behavior: Xiang Liu demonstrates a pattern of manipulation and exploitation throughout the interaction with Ah Nian. He preys on her vulnerability and resentment towards Xiao Yao, using flattery and promises to gain her trust and cooperation. This manipulative behavior is characteristic of individuals with ASPD or NPD, who often exploit others for personal gain without remorse.
2. Lack of Empathy and Remorse: Xiang Liu's disregard for the well-being of others, as evidenced by his willingness to assist Ah Nian in tormenting Xiao Yao, reflects a profound lack of empathy and remorse. He shows no concern for the potential harm his actions may cause, indicating a callous and unempathetic demeanor consistent with ASPD.
3. Grandiosity and Sense of Entitlement: Xiang Liu displays a sense of grandiosity and entitlement, positioning himself as a powerful ally capable of fulfilling Ah Nian's desires. He views himself as superior to others, evidenced by his confident assertion that he would never harm Gao Xing's Princess. This sense of entitlement is a hallmark trait of individuals with NPD, who often exhibit grandiose fantasies of success, power, or beauty.
4. Deception and Manipulation: Xiang Liu engages in deceitful behavior by concealing his true intentions behind a facade of charm and benevolence. He manipulates Ah Nian's emotions and perceptions to further his own agenda, demonstrating a willingness to deceive others for personal gain, which is consistent with the manipulative tendencies observed in individuals with ASPD.
In conclusion, Xiang Liu's actions in the passage align with traits commonly associated with personality disorders, particularly antisocial personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder. His manipulative, exploitative, and unempathetic behavior underscores the complexity of his character and the potential psychological factors driving his actions. While his portrayal as a demon may serve as a narrative device, it does not excuse or justify his harmful behavior towards others. Instead, it adds depth to his characterization and highlights the psychological intricacies at play within the narrative.
In short, you see him=> call a support number , wait for help, be ressourcefull and by no means provoque him!
"Joke" aside. I'm sure that one of his head must already know that he is not doing right...let's wait and see...
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Part 9 - Last Chapter 13 Part :
We left Xiao Yao feeling pretty in her dress, all in beauty with this in her mind:
Waiting for her here is Ye Shiqi.
Here is what happen to her (original version linked in chinese):
http://m.xsbiquge.la/book/36337/19812272/2.html
First the FULL TEXT:
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Xiaoyao looked at the figures on the rocks with joy while walking nervously. Suddenly, a pebble hit her back. Xiaoyao turned around and saw Anian standing far away. He waved to her as if asking her to come over. Xiaoyao walked towards Anian, but Anian turned around and disappeared into the trees.
Xiaoyao frowned, looked back at the seaside, and chased after Anian in the direction where he disappeared.
A Nian's figure disappears and appears in the woods. She has grown up in Wushen Mountain since she was a child. She is far more familiar with Wushen Mountain than Xiao Yao. Her spiritual power is much higher than Xiao Yao. As long as she wants to, it will be easy to get rid of Xiao Yao. easy. Xiaoyao could already tell that A-Nian was deliberately teasing her, but she wanted to see what A-Nian wanted to do.
They passed through the path in the woods and came to the other side of the mountain. Anian stood on the cliff by the sea and waved to Xiaoyao.
Xiaoyao walked over slowly, "What do you want to do?"
A-Nian looked at Xiaoyao carefully from head to toe, with a very complicated expression. Xiaoyao was also sizing up A-Nian and couldn't figure out what A-Nian wanted to do. Even if A-Nian pushed her off the cliff, he wouldn't be able to kill her.
Ah Nian crushed the shell and suddenly rushed towards Xiao Yao. Xiao Yao sighed, "You really want to push me down, do you?" She wanted to dodge and escape, but Ah Nian blocked Xiao Yao's escape route with an ice sword and stood there. Behind Xiaoyao.
Anian said cryptically: "You guessed it right!"
Xiaoyao wanted to kill A-Nian and had a way, but she wanted to beat A-Nian but had no way. As a result, Xiaoyao could only feel a strong force coming from her back, and her body flew off the cliff.
Xiaoyao was not scared. When she was very young, she dared to stand on the edge of the cliff and jump into the sea. Xiaoyao even enjoyed the free flight before falling into the sea.
The sea breeze blew up Xiaoyao's black hair and the green gauze on her body. Like a butterfly, she spread her green wings and flew towards the sea.
Xiaoyao stretched her body and squinted her eyes contentedly. Suddenly, her eyes widened.
Under the bright moonlight, the deep blue sea is sparkling. A man in white clothes and white hair is lying on his back on the rolling waves. He is raising the corners of his lips and looking at her with a smile, as if he is admiring a song that dances just for him. Dance.
Xiaoyao wanted to run away, but in mid-air, her only direction was downward. She could only watch as she and him got closer and closer. Just when she thought she would hit Xiang Liu directly When he was on her body, he sank and she fell into the sea water. He grabbed her hand with both hands and she could only be dragged to the bottom of the sea by him.
He took her swimming under the sea. Xiaoyao felt that Xiang Liu could not possibly want to kill her, but was deliberately torturing her, but she could only endure it.
The last breath in her chest had been exhaled. Xiaoyao grabbed his hand and looked at him pleadingly. He ignored her and continued to swim deeper into the seabed. Xiaoyao was holding it in so hard that it felt like her whole chest was about to explode. Her hands had no strength left. She let go of her fingers. Xiang Liu held her waist and pointed at his lips with a smile. He was saying, he wanted something fresh. Just breathe the air yourself.
Xiaoyao shook her head. In the past, she was Wen Xiaoliu. She never considered herself a woman and it didn't matter what happened. But now, she can't do it.
The smile on Xiang Liu's lips disappeared, he hugged Xiao Yao and continued to sink.
He looked at Xiaoyao, and Xiaoyao looked at him.
Xiang Liu's sinking speeded up, and Xiao Yao began to understand that when facing a nine-headed demon who didn't care about anything, the identity of Gao Xin Wang Ji could not protect her.
Xiang Liu sank faster and faster, but the seemingly soft water produced terrifying power, squeezing Xiao Yao into powder, her chest seemed to explode, and Xiao Yao's whole body was in severe pain.
Life and death are just a simple choice.
Their faces were very close, so close that the tips of their noses were almost touching. Xiaoyao only had to move forward a little to touch his lips.
But, she can't!
Xiaoyao felt as if seawater was pouring into her ears and nose, his lips were so close, so close... Xiaoyao lost consciousness and passed out.
Xiang Liu pressed her head hard, pushed her to his lips, and brought her up.
The two emerged from the sea.
Xiang Liuping sat on the water, bent one leg, lifted the unconscious Xiaoyao, and let her lie on his lap. He held spiritual power in his palm and patted Xiaoyao's back several times, and Xiaoyao let out a cry. She opened her mouth, vomited a few words of water, and gradually woke up. But her whole body was sore, her head was dizzy, and she couldn't move. She closed her eyes and leaned feebly on Xiang Liu's lap.
After resting for a long time, Xiaoyao finally woke up. She held onto Xiang Liu's knees and slowly pushed herself up. It was probably because of Xiang Liu's spiritual support that the water under her body was like an extremely soft cushion. Her movements would make her sink slightly, but they would not let her down. She sank.
Xiang Liu had no expression on his face and kept staring at her without speaking, and Xiao Yao didn't know what to say.
They were in the vast sea, surrounded by boundless darkness, as if they were the only two people left in the world.
Xiaoyao finally said: "Originally, I planned to pretend that I didn't know you when I saw you in the future."
"I still have your Gu in my body, do you want to break the oath you swore?"
Xiaoyao said: "Logically speaking, only I can sense you, and you shouldn't be able to sense me. How do you know that I am Wen Xiaoliu's?"
Xiang Liu raised his hand, pushed the wet hair back from Xiaoyao's face, held her head, and looked at her face carefully, "Is this your true appearance?"
"Um."
"You are very good at lying."
Xiaoyao defended herself, "It's not a lie, I really thought I was Wen Xiaoliu."
"Prince Gao Xin?" Xiang Liu sneered, "No wonder you suddenly wanted to save Xuanxuan even if you died that day."
Xiaoyao didn't dare to say anything anymore.
Xiang Liu's hand seemed to be accidentally placed on her shoulder, his fingers brushed her neck, and he said seductively: "Which of the things you said are false? Why don't you confess it once today? I won't kill you." .”
"I told you before, I only talk nonsense, not lies." Xiaoyao spread his hands, "I like to talk because I am afraid of being lonely. If I tell lies, I will only get lonelier as I talk."
Xiang Liu's nails, which had become a bit sharp, returned to their original shape silently. Xiao Yao had no idea that she really had a brush with death at that moment.
Xiang Liu stared silently into the dark void, not knowing what he was thinking. His whole body was like a sword without a scabbard, so sharp that no one in the world could get close to him.
Xiaoyao didn't know why, but she felt like she was sinking to the bottom of the water again, even though she was on the surface of the water, and her chest felt very tight. She suddenly remembered something, took out her wet purse, took out a small jade bottle, poured out a handful of colorful pills, spread them out in the palm of her hand and showed them to Xiang Liu, "Would you like to try them?"
Xiang Liu slowly put each one into his mouth like eating jelly beans.
"How's it going? I made this specially for you. I checked a lot of information and found a lot of rare medicinal materials."
The coldness on Xiang Liu's body suddenly faded, "It's okay."
"Is it okay?" Xiao Yao almost cried, "Many medicinal herbs are planted on Penglai Island and watered with water from Guixu Water Eye. They have grown for eighteen hundred years."
Xiang Liu said calmly: "Are you still thinking of poisoning me?"
Xiaoyao shook his head, "I think I, the poison god, can poison even the nine-tailed fox demon. There is no reason why I can't poison you, the nine-headed demon!"
Xiang Liu smiled disdainfully, "I'll wait."
Xiaoyao felt that the atmosphere between the two was no longer so tense and asked cautiously: "Why did you get involved with A-Nian?"
"Can't you?"
Xiaoyao grabbed Xiang Liu's lapel and said seriously: "No! Don't provoke her anymore. She is so well protected by my father that she can't resist being teased by someone like you."
Xiang Liu leaned forward and asked with a smile: "What kind of person am I? What kind of person am I?"
Xiaoyao rolled her eyes at him, "You know it yourself."
Xiang Liu said nonchalantly: "She hasn't considered you a sister yet, but you are anxious to be a good sister first."
"In the relationship between people, one person must take the first step. Needless to say, it goes without saying between men and women. This is also true for parents and children. When the children are unaware, parents will start to pay.Personally, I would never be the one to take the first step, but between A-Nian and I, I decided to be the one to take the first step. Not because of how good or worthy she is, but because of my father Wang and Xuan Xuan, I am willing to pay for A-Nian first for my father and Xuanxuan."
"It doesn't mean that you will be rewarded for your efforts. If she can betray you to me, she can betray you to others. If she can push you off the cliff this time, she may be able to insert a dagger into your heart next time."
"I know, so I'm only willing to do this kind of thing once."
Xiang Liu said, "I promise you won't tease your sister again, and you have to promise me something."
"Can I say no?"
"Obviously not."
Xiaoyao blinked and looked at Xiangliu, pretending to be attentive.
Xiang Liu said: "Continue to help me make poison."
This is very simple. Xiaoyao readily agreed, "Yes. But...how can I leave it to you? I'm not in Qingshui Town now, and you can't go to the mountains to find me."
Xiang Liu smiled and said, "This is what you need to consider. Anyway, if I don't see your medicine for too long, I will go find your sister."
Xiaoyao muttered, "I knew you wouldn't let me go so easily."
Xiang Liu said: "I have spared you."
Xiaoyao curled her lips.
Xiang Liu snorted coldly and suddenly asked: "Why?"
Xiaoyao understood that he was asking why he would rather die than kiss him, but she deliberately pretended to be confused, "Why?"
Xiang Liu held her arm and lowered it. Xiao Yao hurriedly shouted: "Oh, I remembered it, I remembered it."
Xiang Liu stared at her, and Xiao Yao said, "I'm scared."
"Would it be worse than death?"
Xiao Yao pondered for a while before slowly said, "My brother, is a tinkling of gems, one night when we chatted, he laughed at me after all, I am still a girl who can dream. Although just, just ...... but I'm afraid that if I'm not careful, you will walk into my dream, and you ......" Xiao Yao shook her head, ”You are definitely not suitable to appear in a girl's dream, that would be even scarier than death."
Xiang Liu laughed softly. Gradually, his laughter became louder and louder. He let go of Xiao Yao and floated away into the distance.
Xiaoyao shouted: "Hey, hey... don't leave me. If you leave me here, how can I go back?"
Xiang Liu smiled and said, "Swim back!"
Xiaoyao's expression changed, "You want me to swim back from here? This is the deep sea, and sea beasts and sea monsters are everywhere. My spiritual power is low, and any sea monster can eat me!"
Xiang Liu said with a smile: "I am doing this for your own good. If I am too gentle and considerate to you, and accidentally enter your dream, making your life worse than death, wouldn't it be a sin?" After Xiang Liu finished speaking, he slowly Slowly sinking to the bottom of the sea and disappearing.
Xiaoyao still didn't believe it and shouted: "Xiang Liu, Xiang Liu, nine lives! Nine-headed monster! Dead devil! Dead nine-headed devil..."
The sea rose and fell together, and the heaven and earth were silent.
Xiaoyao only felt that the color of the sea had become darker. She shuddered, discerned the direction, cursed Xiang Liu, and swam towards the Five Gods Mountain.
At first, she was afraid that some sea beast would suddenly appear and bite her legs off. After a long time, there was still no land in sight. Xiaoyao was worried not about being bitten to death, but about being drowned.
In order to save every ounce of energy, she did not dare to think wildly. She kept her mind blank and thought about nothing, as if she was in meditation during practice, while her body maintained a fixed rhythm and kept paddling.
At first, I could still feel the physical pain caused by exhaustion, but gradually, everything disappeared. The sky was no longer the sky, the sea was no longer the sea, and I couldn’t even feel my own existence. Everything became the instinct of survival. Moving forward in a viscous mass, always moving forward, never stopping.
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Analysis below.
Symbolika1:Analysis
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Title: Drawned in a VICIOUS MASS
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Physical Coercion and Abuse: Xiang Liu's disregard for Xiaoyao's plea for mercy and his insistence on forcing her underwater demonstrate a stark display of physical coercion and abuse. He exerts his power over her by pressing her head towards his lips, disregarding her distress and physical pain.
Struggle for Autonomy: Xiaoyao's resistance to Xiang Liu's demands highlights her struggle and will for autonomy and agency in the face of his domination. Despite her physical and emotional pain, she refuses to comply with his commands, demonstrating her determination to assert her own will and resist being subjugated.
Gendered Violence: The scene underscores the gendered violence inherent in Xiang Liu's actions towards Xiaoyao. His forceful imposition of his will upon her, coupled with her vulnerability and inability to defend herself, reflects broader themes of gender-based violence and the abuse of power.
Existential Desperation: Xiaoyao's contemplation of life and death in the midst of her ordeal reflects a sense of existential desperation and hopelessness. She grapples with the fundamental choices that define her existence, feeling trapped between life and death in a situation where her agency is stripped away.
Emotional Trauma: The passage portrays the emotional trauma inflicted upon Xiaoyao as she confronts Xiang Liu's brutality. Her internal struggle and the intense physical sensations she experiences serve as visceral reminders of the emotional anguish and psychological torment she endures at his hands.
Overall, the scene depicts a harrowing portrayal of abuse and manipulation, highlighting the raw brutality of Xiang Liu's actions and the profound impact they have on Xiaoyao's physical and emotional well-being.
Further with QUOTES:
Quotes:
Physical Coercion and Abuse:
Quote: "Xiang Liu pressed her head hard, pushed her to his lips."
Analysis: This quote vividly illustrates Xiang Liu's physical dominance and coercion over Xiaoyao. The forcefulness of his action, coupled with Xiaoyao's resistance, emphasizes the brutality of the encounter and the imbalance of power between them.
Struggle for Autonomy:
Quote: "But, she can't!"
Analysis: Xiaoyao's internal dialogue reflects her struggle to assert her autonomy and resist Xiang Liu's control. Despite her physical and emotional anguish, she refuses to comply with his demands, underscoring her determination to maintain agency over her own body and choices.
Gendered Violence:
Quote: "He ignored her... her chest seemed to explode."
Analysis: Xiang Liu's disregard for Xiaoyao's pleas and his infliction of physical pain upon her highlight the gendered violence inherent in his actions. The power dynamics at play, where a male figure exerts dominance over a female character, underscore broader themes of gender-based violence and oppression.
Existential Desperation:
Quote: "Life and death are just a simple choice."
Analysis: Xiaoyao's contemplation of life and death amidst her ordeal reflects her existential desperation and sense of hopelessness. The stark simplicity of her statement underscores the gravity of her situation and the profound existential crisis she faces in the midst of Xiang Liu's abuse.
Emotional Trauma:
Quote: "The smile on Xiang Liu's lips disappeared..."
Analysis: The disappearance of Xiang Liu's smile, coupled with Xiaoyao's intense physical pain, serves as a poignant depiction of the emotional trauma inflicted upon her. The visceral nature of her experience highlights the profound impact of Xiang Liu's brutality on her emotional well-being and psychological state.
We have an insight with these quotes and analyses of the raw brutality and emotional intensity of the scene, shedding light on the complex dynamics between Xiaoyao and Xiang Liu and the profound impact of their interaction on both characters.
Quote:
Lies and control :
Xiaoyao said: "Logically speaking, only I can sense you, and you shouldn't be able to sense me. How do you know that I am Wen Xiaoliu's?"
Analysis: By not disclosing the true extent of his knowledge about her, specifically regarding the bug he maintains a position of power and control over Xiaoyao.
His actions demonstrate a deliberate attempt to manipulate Xiaoyao's perception of their interaction, keeping her unaware of the extent to which he can monitor and influence her. This lack of transparency further underscores the power dynamic between them, with Xiang Liu exerting control over Xiaoyao's understanding of their relationship and her own agency.
By withholding crucial information and manipulating Xiaoyao's perception of their connection, Xiang Liu reinforces his dominance and underscores the complexity of their dynamic, characterized by deception and manipulation.
Quote:
Xiang Liu's hand seemed to be accidentally placed on her shoulder, his fingers brushed her neck, and he said seductively: "Which of the things you said are false? Why don't you confess it once today? I won't kill you." .”
The use of the adverb "seductively" emphasizes the subtle yet deliberate nature of his actions, implying an attempt to exert influence over Xiaoyao.
By choosing to switch and employ a seductive tone, Xiang Liu seeks again to manipulate Xiaoyao's emotions and perceptions, aiming to establish a sense of intimacy. This manipulation serves to further reinforce his control over the situation and maintain the power dynamic in his favor.
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But Xiao Yao is not as week as Ah Nian.
Xiaoyao, she ultimately retains agency and control over her own actions and boundaries. Her refusal to kiss Xiang Liu, even at the risk of death, underscores her determination to maintain autonomy and resist his manipulative tactics.
Quote:
"Life and death are just a simple choice"
In the context of Xiaoyao's refusal to comply with Xiang Liu's advances, this statement takes on added significance: Xiaoyao is willing to risk her life rather than compromise her principles on the subject to whom she kiss or not ,and not submit to manipulation. Its more than restisting strength and resolve in the face of coercion it's her will, be it choosing death.
(ep.19 shaking her head "no")
Her willingness to defy him, even in a precarious situation, highlights her commitment to preserving her own integrity and autonomy. Despite Xiang Liu's attempts to establish intimacy and control, Xiaoyao remains steadfast in her refusal, asserting her agency and asserting her own boundaries.
Xiaoyao's refusal to kiss Xiang Liu serves as a powerful assertion of her autonomy and resistance against manipulation. It reinforces her agency and control over her own body and choices, ultimately challenging the power dynamic in their interaction. "But, she can't!".
But - as a choice.
She can't - expression of her will.
HER REFUSAL IS NOT IMPLICIT. It's an EXPLICITLY NO=>
"Xiaoyao shook her head. In the past, she was Wen Xiaoliu. She never considered herself a woman and it didn't matter what happened. But now, she can't do it."
She than rather embrace Death.
Textual reference:
passed out
Died.
Xiaoyao's refusal is explicit and unequivocal. She gave her life for it.
Whether some may fantasizes her or fantasizes to be in her position at that moment and do otherwise, it's their fantasy. Why not ? It's fiction. But as we see from the text ( even in koala's version) - It's absolutly not Xiao Yao's will/desire/wish/dream/- and that should be fully respected, if not understood from the text. As none word is existing in this whole chapter 13 passage , to make her even slightly shiver with desire, her heart fluff------ and the writer know those words:
Related few exemples(ch6,ch8)- "Xiao Liu’s evil side rose up so he maintained his position and closed his eyes, pretending he saw and heard nothing, waiting to see how Jing would react.",
"Xiao Liu naughtily licked the center of his palm with his tongue and Shi Qi was like being hit with an electric shock "
(By the way he is still waiting for Xiao Yao at the Dragon Bone Prison....)
We see from these extracts that she knows to express her naughtyness, and hotness. But it's with Jing.
What about her Heart? The Bug connection? the famous BUG is bugging ? - why arent they singing with unicorns flying over them both? I mean in love people should see and feel butterflies in their very bodies at a moment like that. You love - you desire-you want to at least kiss, your heartbeats are wild racing , there is no one around- let's goo....! While, even, if I am making a little joke here, you do understand the overall meaning.Right? It - Should be hot if romanced. It's cold as a refrigirator compartment. There is not even a single fish to sing a little song.
Let's continue with Quotes:
"I still have your Gu in my body, do you want to break the oath you swore?"
As no charm is operating he even have to remind her of the bug. It's a torture.It's abuse. It's manipulation.
Was it maybe because he drawned her fistly?. Maybe.
Quote:
"Xiang Liu sank faster and faster, but the seemingly soft water produced terrifying power, squeezing Xiao Yao into powder, her chest seemed to explode, and Xiao Yao's whole body was in severe pain."
Ultimately, Xiaoyao's refusal to comply with Xiang Liu's desires represents a significant moment of empowerment and agency for her character. It reinforces her role as a protagonist who actively asserts control over her own destiny, rather than allowing others to dictate her actions or decisions. As readers, it's important to recognize and honor her agency, as it contributes to the depth and complexity of her character, and resonates with themes of autonomy, consent, and empowerment within the narrative.
(continue)
Symbolika1:(continue)
Continuing Analysis:
Quote: "Xiang Liu stared silently into the dark void, not knowing what he was thinking."------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The imagery of Xiang Liu staring into the "dark void" suggests a sense of emptiness and ambiguity surrounding his thoughts. The darkness symbolizes the unknown and the depths of his inner turmoil, hinting at inner darkness. After the textual coma, we see that even Xiang Liu himself not fully understand/is aware of his own motivations. His thougts are veiled to himself.
Moreover, the use of the word "void" implies a sense of emptiness or lack of clarity in Xiang Liu's thoughts, reinforcing the notion that his mind is a complex labyrinth of conflicting emotions and motivations. This emptiness could also reflect his internal struggle with his identity as a demon and his interactions with others, particularly Xiaoyao.
Xiao Yao resourcefulness :
When Xiaoyao feels herself sinking and her chest tightening, she recalls the small jade bottle containing the colorful pills. This action reveals her ability to stay calm under pressure and to adapt to changing circumstances.
A skill honed through her experiences as both a survivor and a practitioner of poisoncraft. She knew it would distract him and she used it:
Xiang Liu slowly put each one into his mouth like eating jelly beans.The coldness on Xiang Liu's body suddenly faded, "It's okay."
She than try to dissuade him from provoking A-Nian further. Her plea for sister underscores her protective nature, especially considering her father's strong connection to A-Nian and her will to please him.
To witch he is leveraging his compliance with her request to not use her sister again- against her cooperation in helping him make poison. This demonstrates a power play on Xiang Liu's part, as he seeks to manipulate Xiaoyao into fulfilling his own agenda by using her personal relationships and vulnerabilities as leverage.
The coercion in this exchange is underscored by Xiang Liu's authoritative tone and demeanor. His insistence that Xiaoyao cannot refuse ("Can I say no? Obviously not.") further emphasizes his attempt to manipulate and control her actions.
BUT: Why?
Xiang Liu's initial question, "Why?", is laden with ambiguity and carries multiple layers of meaning. On the surface, it seems to inquire about Xiaoyao's reluctance to engage in the intimate act of kissing him. However, beneath the surface, it delves into deeper psychological and emotional issues, probing into Xiaoyao's fears and insecurities.
Xiaoyao's deliberate pretense of confusion highlights her awareness of Xiang Liu's underlying intentions and her reluctance to confront them directly. This tactic serves to protect herself from further vulnerability while maintaining a semblance of control in the interaction.
Xiang Liu's subsequent question, "Would it be worse than death?" reflects his attempt to gauge the extent of Xiaoyao's fear and the intensity of her emotional response. By framing the situation in such stark terms, he emphasizes the gravity of their interaction and the potential consequences of Xiaoyao's actions.
Further:
Expression of Fear: Xiaoyao's admission that she is scared reveals the depth of her emotional state and the profound impact that Xiang Liu's advances have on her. This fear is not merely of physical harm but encompasses a deeper, more visceral dread that speaks to her psychological well-being and sense of self.
Assertion of Boundaries: Xiaoyao's response serves as a firm assertion of her boundaries and autonomy. Despite the power dynamics at play and Xiang Liu's persistent advances, she refuses to capitulate to his desires out of fear for her own well-being. This refusal underscores her strength of character and determination to maintain agency over her body and emotions.
Sibling Dynamics: Xiaoyao references her brother, Xuanxuan, indicating a close relationship between them. The fact that she recalls a specific incident involving him laughing at her suggests that their relationship is not without its complexities or tensions. This incident likely left a lasting impression on Xiaoyao, contributing to her sense of vulnerability and insecurity. Recalling it at this moment suggests that her relationship with her brother and the dynamics between them are central to her understanding of herself and her approach to relationships with others. She could very likely signify to Xiang Liu that he likely more a brotherlike figure or companion rather than a potential lover in her inner perception.
Fear of Vulnerability: When Xiaoyao mentions being a "girl who can dream," she alludes to her capacity for vulnerability and imagination. Dreams often represent a realm of subconscious thoughts and emotions, and for Xiaoyao, they symbolize a space where her innermost fears and desires are laid bare. By expressing fear of Xiang Liu entering her dreams, she reveals a reluctance to expose her vulnerable inner world to him, fearing further manipulation or harm, and set her boundaries.
Preference for Death over Vulnerability: Xiaoyao's assertion that appearing in a girl's dream would be "more terrifying than death" underscores the depth of her fear and aversion to vulnerability. This statement suggests that she would rather face death than expose herself to the potential psychological harm of allowing someone like Xiang Liu into her inner world. It highlights her strong sense of self-preservation and the lengths to which she will go to protect her emotional well-being.
To wich statement he laugh. And throw her away.
He is obvious hurted. And again inflict pain to Xiao Yao. The bug must be bugging again I guess...
Extract as he leave:
The sky was no longer the sky, the sea was no longer the sea, and I couldn’t even feel my own existence. Everything became the instinct of survival. Moving forward in a viscous mass, always moving forward, never stopping.
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The Vicious Mass: Analysis
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The sky was no longer the sky, the sea was no longer the sea, and I couldn’t even feel my own existence. Everything became the instinct of survival. Moving forward in a viscous mass, always moving forward, never stopping.
Physical Pain and Exhaustion: The passage begins with Xiao Yao acknowledging the physical pain caused by exhaustion, indicating the intensity of the situation she finds herself in. This pain serves as a tangible reminder of her struggle and the harsh reality of her circumstances.
Gradual Dissociation: As Xiao Yao's exhaustion deepens, there is a gradual dissociation from her surroundings. The description of how "everything disappeared" implies a detachment from the physical world around her. This dissociation can be interpreted as a coping mechanism, a way for her mind to distance itself from the immediate suffering and danger.
Loss of Perception: Xiao Yao describes how the sky and sea lose their usual significance and identity. This loss of perception suggests a disorientation and confusion, where familiar landmarks or elements of nature become indistinguishable or irrelevant. It reflects the disarray of her mental state and the overwhelming nature of her ordeal.
Loss of Self-Awareness: Xiao Yao's inability to feel her own existence underscores a profound sense of disconnection from herself. This loss of self-awareness hints at a state of existential crisis, where her identity and sense of self become blurred or obscured by the overwhelming challenges she faces.
Instinct of Survival: Despite the overwhelming circumstances,Xiao Yao's survival instinct remains intact. The description of "moving forward in a viscous mass" emphasizes the relentless determination to persevere despite the odds. This instinctual drive highlights the resilience of the human spirit in the face of adversity.
Symbolism of Forward Movement: The continuous forward movement symbolizes not only physical endurance but also emotional resilience and the will to overcome obstacles. It conveys a sense of hope amidst despair, suggesting that even in the darkest moments, there remains a possibility for progress and hopefully a survivor's triumph.
https://jungcurrents.com/jung-sea-unconscious
C.G.Jung : Water is the “valley spirit,” the water dragon of Tao, whose nature resembles water- a yang in the yin, therefore, water means spirit that has become unconscious.
Archetypes of the Collective Unconscious
Paragraph 40
The sea she is swimming into ...is described by the author not only as dangerous but as a vicious mass.
As it directly follow the previous encounter I relate it to it and make the asumption of the following meaning:Xiang Liu 's last harmfull actions toward her where so harsh, that even her unconsciouss is left as poisoned- so badly injured and affected negativly by resonance (the vicious mass she swim in).
****Let's Dive with Xiao Yao and REWIND a bit:
the purpose of the settled trap and torment told to ah nian in the begining:
Extract-
Xiang Liu looked at Ah Nian and gently suggested “You want to torment her a bit but not kill her, is that right?” -“All you need to do is lure her out and not be detected. I’ll handle the rest."
All actions driven to kiss Xiaoyao, despite her clear refusal and subsequent collapse, represent a significant physical danger and violation of her autonomy. This act crosses boundaries of consent and demonstrates a blatant disregard for Xiaoyao's well-being and agency. The fact that Xiaoyao collapses in the water, symbolizing her vulnerability and near-death experience, underscores the severity of the situation.
The physical danger is intertwined with moments of desperate intervention, as he have to revive her. This sequence further emphasizes the perilous nature of Xiaoyao's interactions with Xiang Liu and underscores the challenges she faces in asserting her autonomy and resisting his coercive advances.
"more terrifying than death"
No loving red flying hearts or flower petals in the back of her horizon, no bug resonation in any sort of tone. But a vicious mass. Two striking words.
As:
"Everything became the instinct of survival. Moving forward in a viscous mass, always moving forward, never stopping."
We see how this part of the chapter 13 presents a narrative that is not only anti-romantic, but abusive and focusing instead on themes of fear, coercion, and survival. The refusal of Xiaoyao to engage in the kiss, her genuine terror at the thought of Xiang Liu invading her dreams, and her struggle for survival in the face of overwhelming challenges all contribute to a storyline that is distinctly non-romantic. Rather than portraying romantic interactions or emotions, the passage highlights power dynamics, personal boundaries, and the harsh realities of the characters' circumstances. It serves as a stark reminder that not all relationships are built on love and affection, and that sometimes, individuals must navigate through adversity and maintain their autonomy in the face of coercion and danger. Set boundaries and continue to swim.
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Let's count with Xiao Yao while she swim...
The repeated emphasis on physical and emotional pain underscores the intense and unsettling nature of the situation, reinforcing the none-romantic tone of the passage - writers used words:
downward - 1
torturing - 2
ignore - 1
explode - 1
lost - 1
unconsciousness - 1
hard - 2
died - 1
coldly - 1
terrified - 1
worse than death - 1
shuddered - 1
cursed - 1
drowned - 1
pain - 1
disappeared - 1
dark - 2
fear - 1
death - 3
kill - 1
vicious mass - 1
bitten to death - 1
sinking - 2
betray - 1
sinking to the bottom of the water - 1
chest felt very tight - 1
sharp - 1
brush with death - 1
afraid - 1
defended - 1
lying - 1
break - 1
darkness - 1
vomited - 1
sore - 1
passed out - 1
severe pain - 1
sink - 1
to kill her - 1
sink to the bottom of the water - 1
torturing her - 1
tension - 1
pleadingly - 1
loneliness - 1
lonely - 1
silent - 1
not speak - 1
torment - 1
ignoring - 1
dizzy - 1
shivered - 1
struggling - 1
desperate - 1
trouble - 1
problem - 1
frustrated - 1
no longer - 1
sin - 1
silent - 1
shouted - 1
That brings the total count to 60 instances of negative words in the Xiao Yao - XL short passage.
Whike 9 neutral or positive:
Okay
Agreement
Support
Calmly
Sparing
Considerate
Smile- 2: Xiang Liu smiles as he floats away into the distance after Xiaoyao expresses her fear.+"Xiang Liu smiles seductively while speaking to Xiaoyao."
Doing this for your own good
Come on swim Xiao Yao!! You can make it through !
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In conclusion - despite facing adversity and abuse, Xiaoyao demonstrates remarkable strength and resilience throughout the passage. After being subjected to coercion and manipulation by Xiang Liu, she maintains her agency and refuses to succumb to his demands easily. Her refusal to comply with his advances, despite the consequences, underscores her determination to assert her autonomy and resist his control.She refuses to give up, even when struggling, to relinquish her sense of self.
Furthermore, Xiaoyao's decision to confront Xiang Liu and assert her boundaries, despite the risks involved, demonstrates her courage and resilience in the face of adversity and abusive behavior.
Despite the power imbalance between them, she refuses to be silenced or intimidated, highlighting her unwavering resolve and inner fortitude.
Overall, her refusal to be defined by her circumstances and her determination to assert her autonomy make her a compelling and empowering character. She rocks ! (again).
Bonus Hooray to Tushan Jing/Yeshiqi who is waiting for her. (he rocks too).
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Navigating LINKS:
Prologue & Chapter 1: https://mydramalist.com/discussions/lost-you-forever/122337-tong-hua-s-xiaojing-drama-novel-exploration-x1f49c?page=1
Chapter 3 : https://mydramalist.com/discussions/lost-you-forever/122337-tong-hua-s-xiaojing-drama-novel-exploration-x1f49c?page=2 &https://mydramalist.com/discussions/lost-you-forever-season-2/122339-tong-hua-s-xiaojing-drama-novel-exploration-x1f49c?p=2928519&page=3
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CHAPTER 14 text (full original version, followed by a DeepL translation):
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小夭不知道究竟过去了多久,只知道当她的手触碰到一个硬物,本能地抓紧时,她的眼睛才恢复了一点视觉。
看清那是一块礁石,小夭的整个身子立即瘫软,她趴在礁石上,看到远处礁岩的顶上,一个黑黢黢的人影固执地伫立着。
此时,天际已经蒙蒙亮,清冷的晨曦中,那个颀长的人影好似已和礁岩融为一体,镶嵌在天地之间,成为了天荒地老的等候。
小夭也不知是累,还是喜悦,嗓子发涩,发不出声音,她无力地举起手,好似在挥,却又全然没动。
终于,岩壁上的人看见了她,顾不上从岸上走,他飞跃下岩壁,跳进大海,奋力游到小夭身边,抱起她。两个人半浸在海水中,小夭因为力竭,身子在不停地颤抖,璟却不知道为什么,身子也在不停地颤抖。
两个人颤得都说不出话来,小夭能听见自己上下牙齿打战的声音。她觉得又好笑又郁闷,精心妆扮,没想到竟然以最狼狈的姿态出现。
小夭打着冷战说:“别、别……水里。”泡了一夜的海水,真的不想再泡了。
璟抱着她爬上礁石,可蹒跚地走了几步,竟然脚下打滑,向下跌去。璟怕伤到小夭,用自己的背脊着地,砰一声响,跌得不轻。
小夭笑,“你、你……还九……狐……笨……”
终于到了岸上,璟抱着小夭走到避风的岩壁下,小夭脸色惨白,嘴唇发乌,璟一手贴着她的后心,一手握着她的手掌,把灵力缓缓输进去,慢慢地在她身体内游走了几圈,小夭的身体才不再颤抖了。
此时,外面已经大亮,岩壁下的这个小小角落,因为礁岩和树林的遮掩,依旧阴暗。
璟看小夭的身体暖和了,收回了放在她后心的手,觉得也应该松开握住她手的手,却又舍不得,手一时松一时紧。小夭看着他,调笑道:“你以前倒是胆子大,现在竟然胆小了?”
璟松开了手,“现在和以前不一样。”
“哪里不一样?”
璟看了她一眼,又急急垂下了眼眸。
小夭摸了摸乱七八糟的湿发,又掐掐脸颊,估计脸色也好看不到哪里去,很是沮丧,决定回去真要狠狠教训阿念一顿了。小夭站起来,“我回去了。”
璟急忙站起,拉住她的胳膊,又触电般立刻松开,脸上有些烫。高辛的衣衫轻薄飘逸,浸湿后就顺服地贴在了身上,刚才缩坐着时不觉得,此时站起来,一下子腰是腰、胸是胸,看得格外分明。
小夭看到璟的神情,低头看了下自己,立即蹲下去,双手抱着膝盖,把自己捂了个严实。
璟坐在她对面,用灵力帮她把衣服弄干后,低声道:“待会儿再回去,好吗?就一会儿。”
小夭没有吭声。
“我等了你一夜,以为你不会来了。”
小夭气恼地问:“既然觉得我不会来了,为什么还要等?”
璟不知道该怎么回答,如果她真不来了,他也不知道能去哪里,在这地底的深处,他有过最幸福甜蜜的时刻。可是给了他幸福甜蜜的人是小六,不是眼前的这个少女,如果她收回,他完全明白。
小夭双膝跪地,膝行到他身前,眼中满是恼怒委屈,“你以为你等了一夜,很辛苦吗?你有未婚妻!你和她同进同出,却变着法子时时刻刻地提醒我对你许过诺言。你既然不信我,为什么要让我许诺?我告诉你,昨夜我为了遵守对你的承诺,差点死了!”小夭狠狠地推璟,“我不玩了,我收回承诺!你赶紧滚回青丘,去娶防风意映吧!”
璟不敢还手,却也坚决不后退,“我不会娶她,她其实并不喜欢我,应该也不会愿意嫁给我。”
小夭停止了推搡,“我不信!她为什么会不喜欢你?”
“我腿残了,看得出来她很惊讶也很失望。有一次,她看到了我身上的伤痕,受了惊……”其实,说受惊是很含蓄的说法,意映当时脸色惨白,神情惊惧,一眼都不敢看他,并且从那之后,两人单独相处时,意映都会和他保持距离。
小夭很难受,她知道璟的腿不方便,也知道璟身上的伤痕有些恐怖,可这不应该是他被嫌弃的理由。小夭说:“你们订婚几十年了,难道她还会在意这些外在的东西吗?”
“实际上,在清水镇见面前,我完全不知道她究竟长什么样,我们从未见过面。她是母亲挑中的人,当时,母亲已经染病,我不想让母亲再操心我的婚事,立即答应了。订婚后,我又要照顾母亲,又要处理族中事务,忙得不可开交,根本顾不上多想此事,倒是大哥悄悄溜去看防风意映,回来后笑嘻嘻地和我说‘恭喜,果然是花容月貌、聪慧伶俐’。母亲去世后,我要面对崩溃的大哥,没有心情想什么男女情事。奶奶揭开大哥的身世秘密后,我更是无心去想。直到一切平息下来,奶奶说我该成婚了,我才想起我还有个未婚妻。奶奶年纪已大,大嫂像是不存在,涂山氏的确需要一个女主人,帮奶奶分忧解劳。奶奶和长老商量后,择定了婚期,没想到还未举行婚礼,我就被大哥幽禁了。”
原来清水镇的相逢竟然是他和防风意映的初遇,那也难怪防风意映会失望……小夭的心里五味杂陈,有些酸涩难受,又有些高兴,自己都不知道自己究竟在想什么。
半晌后,小夭幽幽说道:“防风小姐的确是花容月貌,人又能干。眼光挑剔一点,也是正常,你别往心里去。”
“你、最美。”璟说完,立即低下了头。
“即使现在这样?”
“嗯。”
小夭扑哧笑了出来,“终于明白为什么玱玹的花言巧语对少女们无往不利了,虽然明知道你说的不是事实,可依旧喜欢听。”
“我说的是事实。小夭,我没有想到你是这样的,如果我知道你是这样的……即使在黑暗的地牢里,我也绝不会有勇气说出奢望……”璟的背脊挺得笔直,头却低垂着,犹如一株长在阴暗中、终年见不到阳光的植物,“我的身体,我的声音……你知道为什么我明知道能医好腿却不肯医治吗?因为我知道纵使好了,真正的伤依旧在身体里面,那是什么药都治不好的。我能穿上衣服遮去身上的丑陋伤痕,我能用稀世良药治好腿,我也能尽量少说话,掩饰自己难听的声音。我能欺骗所有人,我依旧是风华出众的青丘公子,可我欺骗不了自己……小夭,我配不上你!这世间,有许多健康聪慧英俊的男儿……”
“璟,抬头!涂山璟,抬起头。”
璟慢慢地抬起了头,小夭的脸凑到他的脸边,喃喃低语:“昨夜,有个男人逼我亲他,现在我却只想亲你。”她的唇轻轻落在璟的唇上,璟的身子剧颤了一下,往后猛地一缩,躲开了小夭,“别……小夭。”
小夭闭着眼睛,仰着头,双颊酡红,身子在轻颤,“璟……璟……”
小夭的轻唤声抖得几乎要听不出她在叫什么,璟觉得自己好像也在颤,他的吻落在了小夭额间的绯红上,就好似有一团火从小夭额间一直烧到了他心里,让他冰凉的心暖和起来,或许迟早有一日,那些藏在身体里、无药可医的伤口也会康复。
璟紧紧地抱着小夭,头埋在小夭颈间,像是做梦一般欢喜,让他只想永远搂着小夭,永不放开。
小夭呻吟,“你快把我勒断气了。”
璟立即松开了她,满脸通红。小夭轻笑,头倚在他的臂弯上,看着他。
璟不好意思,略微偏过了头,“刚才你说你昨夜差点死了,还说……”
小夭不在意地挥挥手,“我说气话吓唬你的。”
璟看向小夭,心中疑惑,却知道小夭不想再提了。
小夭笑问:“为什么不是这里?”她指指自己的唇。
璟低声说:“还不是时候。”
“那什么时候才……可以。”小夭半闭着眼睛,用手掩着脸,掩饰着羞意。
璟回答不出,因为那是由小夭决定,并不是他。他不是不渴望,而是——他想要她的爱,他不想她只是因为怜惜,小夭已经给了他太多,他不想继续利用她的善良。
小夭从手指缝里偷看他,“我以为你们男人见了女人,都恨不得立即掀翻到榻上,扒光了衣服……”小夭说不下去了,自从换回女儿身,不知不觉中她就没办法像小六一样没羞没臊了,尤其现在,更是恨不得把刚说的话都吞回去。
璟虽一直洁身自好,可毕竟是执掌一族之人,出入风月场所是常事,而且世家大族的子弟中免不了一些宣淫纵欲之事,璟自然是男人应该知道的事都知道。在生意场上,别说比这更露骨的话,就是更露骨的事都见过,却是没任何感觉,谈笑如常。可对着小夭,只觉得火烧火燎得不自在,低声辩解:“我、不是那样。”
两人都沉默,尴尬中有丝丝缕缕的羞涩,窘迫中又有淡淡的欣悦。
“小夭……小夭……”玱玹的叫声传来。
两人像做了贼一样,被惊得立即分开。小夭对璟做了个嘘的手势,示意他别出声躲起来。
小夭随便扒拉了一下头发,钻进树丛,绕到礁石上,对着玱玹挥手,“在这里呢!”
玱玹快步跑过来,“你怎么这个狼狈样子?”说着话立即把自己的外袍解下,披到小夭身上。
小夭说:“我为什么变成了这个模样?还不是你的好妹妹,我回去要收拾阿念了。”
玱玹召来云辇,扶小夭上车,“我还以为你打算一直忍下去。”
小夭瞟了一眼岩壁的方向,登上了车,“再不教训她,下一次只怕她就要做出让父王和你痛心的事情了。”
“她究竟做了什么?”
小夭神秘地笑笑,“这是我们姊妹之间的事情,你就别插手了。”如果让玱玹知道阿念竟然敢勾结相柳来设计她,玱玹非气死不可。
玱玹问:“你见到璟了吗?”
“见到了。”
“你们……说了些什么?”
“就随便聊了聊,嗯……他说了点他和防风意映的事,也聊了一点别的。”
玱玹似笑非笑地说:“随便聊聊,聊得通宵未回宫?”
小夭理直气壮地反问:“你看我这样子像舒服地玩了一整夜的人吗?如果不是你的好妹妹,我早回宫睡觉了。”
玱玹捻起她的头发,看里面又是海藻又是沙子,摇头笑道:“看来真没少受罪,你总算是在阿念手里吃了一次亏。你也别一口一声我的好妹妹,论远近,那是你妹妹!”
小夭耷拉着脸,叹气,突然想起什么,问道:“那个涂山篌,你觉得如何?”
“不错。”
小夭流露出感兴趣的样子,玱玹只得详细解释:“他本人很有才华,比起璟而言,他更刚毅霸气,听说璟失踪的那些年,涂山家的很多事都是他做主,他做得很不错,可惜璟一回来,他就必须退让。我觉得很奇怪,他们是孪生子,篌是长子,才能又不输璟,理应他的地位更重要。可很奇怪,涂山家显然更看重璟,丰隆他们也都好似不太拿篌当回事,尤其是丰隆,看上去很客气有礼,但那种客气有礼相比起他对璟的熟不拘礼,实际非常让人难受。世家子弟的圈子,看似很复杂,非常难进入,可又很简单,几个关键人物的态度能决定一切,比如他们的这个圈子,丰隆和璟表明了看重我,别人也就自然而然给了我几分尊重。篌就比较惨,丰隆虽然因为他是涂山氏接纳了他,可显然并不真正认可他。不过,我有一种感觉,篌绝不是甘愿永居人下的人,他只是在忍耐,我从他的眼里看到了野心。”
小夭点点头,“感觉你对他的印象不坏。”
玱玹自嘲地笑起来,“因为他其实和我的处境有点像。我们都是在忍耐,都是在等待时机能一击杀死对手,我们也都渴望向所有人证明自己。”
小夭的神色变得凝重,玱玹说:“别担心,璟若没点手段,丰隆不会那么看重信任他,其实只要璟愿意,他完全可以先下手为强,除掉篌。可不知道他怎么想的,迟迟不动手。”玱玹拍拍她的肩膀,笑道,“看在璟的这条命是你救回来的分儿上,只要璟没有得罪你,我会盯着篌的,而且我怀疑……”玱玹眯着眼冷笑,“篌和王叔有勾结。”
小夭放心了几分,蹙眉说道:“防风氏是否也已经投靠了舅舅他们?”
“看防风意映的举动,应该是。要不然一个防风氏怎么敢对我一再下杀手?这世上非要我死的不就是咱们的那几个长辈吗?”
小夭叹道:“我还真佩服你们,你们这一个想杀一个的,竟然能毫无芥蒂、有说有笑地一起玩。”
玱玹笑眯眯地说:“难道你不觉得这也是一种乐趣吗?”
小夭大笑,“的确!”
云辇停住,小夭跃下车,却没打算进殿,对侍女吩咐:“给我随便拿件破衣服出来。”
侍女忙跑进去,拿了一件被阿念毁掉的衣服给小夭,小夭把玱玹的外袍扔还给他,把破衣服往身上一裹,就要走。
玱玹叫道:“你不换件衣服再去找阿念算账?”
小夭回身,甩了甩夹杂着海藻和沙子的头发,说道:“要的就是这个气势!”
玱玹笑:“那我不管你们了,我去找丰隆和馨悦他们,他们明天就要走了。”
小夭边走边挥挥手,“你去找你的乐子,我去找我的乐子。”
小夭一脚踢开阿念的殿门,走了进去,估计昨晚阿念担着心事,没有睡好,这会儿还没起身。
侍女们纷纷阻挡小夭,“大王姬,二王姬还没起身,您若有事……”
小夭手脚齐上,噼里啪啦地全部踹开、推开。海棠挡在门前,小夭说:“怎么?你还想和我动手?”
海棠跪下,“奴婢不敢。”却就是不让路。
小夭破口大骂:“阿念,你有种做,就要有种认!躲在奴婢背后算什么?你个孬种!”
阿念拉开了门,对海棠说:“你让开,我倒要看看她敢做什么,她若真有胆子,今天就把我杀了,我才算服她!”
几个婢女劝道:“大王姬、二王姬,你们……”
小夭和阿念齐声喝道:“滚!”
婢女们忙拉着海棠躲到一旁,小夭对阿念说:“有胆子请我进去啊,看看我会对你做什么。”
阿念冷哼,让开了路。
小夭走进去,拴好门。她指指自己,“你合着别人把我弄成这样,满意了?”
阿念施施然地坐下,端起水想喝,“还算满意。”
小夭端起案上的水壶,把一整壶水泼到她脸上,“你个没长脑子的东西!”
阿念跳了起来,“你、你……我今天不打你个半死,我就不是高辛忆。”她挥手,却发现灵力好似消失了,别说冰棍子,就是冰渣子都没出来一个。
小夭向她勾勾手,“别光说不练!”
阿念随手拿起一柄玉如意,像挥舞棍子一般去砸小夭,小夭拿起了她的凤凰琴,和她对打起来。玉如意断了,阿念又抓起半人高的鎏金缠枝莲花水镜,朝着小夭狠狠砸去,把自己的凤凰琴砸了个稀巴烂。
小夭抓起一堆脂粉盒,边砸阿念,边躲,“你个蛮牛,倒有几分力气。”
小夭跳到案上,阿念把几案砸了个稀巴烂。
小夭躲到架旁,顺手拿了花瓶和书砸阿念,阿念以水镜横扫,把整个架子都砸翻了。
小夭退到榻旁,阿念逼了过来,“我看你还往哪里逃?”
气怒下阿念已经忘记了轻重,她把水镜狠狠地砸向小夭,只想让这个人消失在她的世界。
小夭像猿猴一般跳起,攀在榻顶,躲开致命的一击。她落下时,用力把整个纱帐扯落,重重叠叠的纱幔落在阿念身上。这些纱幔不是水火不侵的鲛绡,就是刀剑都割不断的盘丝蛛纱,阿念扯了半天,不但没有扯开,反倒把自己越缠越紧。
小夭冲着她小腹狠狠踹了一脚,阿念重重摔倒在地上,后脑勺砸在地板上,疼得脸发青。
小夭骑坐到她身上,“高辛忆,这就是你!失去了灵力,就什么都做不了!失去了你的身份,就什么都不是!”
阿念的眼泪涌出来,“你以为你比我强吗?如果你娘不是轩辕的王姬,玱玹会在乎你吗?如果你不是轩辕王的外孙女,别人会觉得你比我强吗?你除了血脉比我高贵,还有什么地方比我强?我至少自己辛苦修炼了,灵力比你高强,可你呢?说什么王母的徒弟,可你连最普通的妖怪也打不过!如果不是你的这些身份,父王会为你举行盛大的拜祭仪式吗?难道你以为大荒的宾客只是冲着看你来的?我告诉你,不是!他们是因为你爹是高辛王,你娘是轩辕王姬,你外祖父是轩辕王,你师父是王母!除去这些身份,你其实比我更一无是处!”
原来这就是阿念的自卑,小夭沉思了一瞬,说道:“你竟然在怨恨你娘出身太微贱了!”
阿念疯了一样吼叫:“我没有!我才没有!我娘是世上最好的,不许你这么说我娘……”
阿念挣扎着想起来,小夭给了她鼻子一拳,打得她眼泪鼻涕全出来,再挣扎不动,小夭压着她的胸膛说:“你还不敢承认?你不就是因为你娘而在怨恨吗?虽然你自己什么都比我强,可就是因为你娘只是一个身份微贱的女子,不仅微贱,还又聋又哑,所以你处处显得比我差。你是不是想着,如果你是王母的徒弟,你灵力都不知道有多高了?你是不是想着,如果你是轩辕王的外孙女,你绝不会像我这么没用?”
阿念呜呜哭泣,小夭拍着她的脸颊说:“你敢发毒誓说你真的没有这么想过?”
阿念的哭声越来越大。她从不承认她怨怪了娘,可是她的确有过那些念头,她并不比小夭差,可每个人都更看重小夭,难道不就是因为小夭的娘亲吗?如果小夭的娘不是轩辕王姬,如果小夭的娘是和她娘一样身份微贱的女子,小夭能让每个人都待她不同吗?小夭能让全大荒都震动吗?
阿念惊慌地想,难道我真的在介意娘的身份?
不,不会!娘是那么温柔,又是那么可怜,她和父王是娘仅有的一切,她绝不会介意娘的身份!
小夭喝道:“有本事想,就要有本事承认,除了哭,你还会做什么?”
阿念依旧放声大哭,小夭掏出一点药粉,撒在纱幔上,几缕轻烟腾起,水火不侵、刀剑不伤的纱幔竟然被腐蚀出了一个个的小窟窿眼。
小夭拿着药粉,对阿念说道:“你再哭,我就轻轻一吹,把这药粉吹到你脸上。”小夭说着话,又撒了一点药粉到纱幔上,轻烟飘起。
阿念立即紧紧地咬着唇,恐惧地瞪着小夭,眼泪依旧在往外涌,却不敢再哭出声音。
小夭收起了药粉,“这才方便谈话嘛!既然我知道了你的秘密,我也告诉你一个我的秘密。其实你怨怪你娘的身份不是什么大不了的事情,因为我对我娘的身份可是恨。”小夭瞅了阿念一眼,“不相信吗?看来咱们的父王真是太精明厉害了,这么多年竟然没有人敢在你面前嚼舌头!我来告诉你吧!你知道五神山上为什么没有人敢提起我娘吗?因为我娘休了咱们的父王!”
阿念忘记了哭,震惊地看着小夭。这天下,竟然有女人敢抛弃高辛王?
小夭说:“我娘休了咱们的父王后,带着我住在轩辕山的朝云峰,如果这事就这样,那也罢了,可是她居然又为了什么家国天下的大义,跑去领兵打仗。她把我送到玉山王母那里,骗我说让我在玉山玩,她过段日子就来接我,结果……她一去不返,战死了!玉山那个鬼地方,根本就不是正常人住的地方。婢女都像哑巴,王母如果一个月说了十句话,那就算非常健谈了。我日日盼着娘来接我,等了她七十年,可她……”小夭冷笑,“这就是我娘说的过段日子就来接我!”
小夭俯下身子,对阿念认真地说:“说老实话,如果老天允许一个人可以选择娘,我想要你娘。你娘温柔娇弱,老老实实地把父王当成她的天,一心一意地跟着父王。她只是一个什么都不会的弱女子,不用承担任何大义,可以守着女儿长大,不管任何时候,只要你想要她时,她就在那里等着你,全天下的人都背弃你时,她依旧守着你。”
阿念怔怔发呆,小夭拍拍她的脸颊,“你肯不肯和我换娘?”
阿念立即叫:“不,绝不!我娘是我的。”就好像小夭真要和她抢娘。
小夭从阿念身上起来,一边帮她解纱幔,一边说:“不管你愿不愿意,反正本姑娘就是出现在你的世界了,如今你只有两条路可以走。”
小夭不敢真松开阿念,只让她的脸露了出来。小夭粗鲁地推了阿念一把,让阿念坐起来,她蹲在阿念身前,“第一条路就是现在的路,咱俩不好好相处,你不停地找我碴,甚至不惜联合外人来整治我。你有仔细想过这条路的结局是什么吗?”
阿念没有说话,小夭说道:“你会让父王痛苦,你会失去玱玹。”
阿念瞪着小夭,小夭说:“对父王而言,我和你就像手心手背,手心手背都是肉,不管是你伤了,还是我伤了,他都会痛。父王如果痛了,你娘的天就变了,你娘也会痛!如果爹娘都痛了,我不相信你这做女儿的会觉得愉快!而玱玹,也许你不愿意承认,但我知道你心里明白,所以你才一再要验证。我不是父王和玱玹,我不拿假话哄你,我和玱玹血脉相连,安危相系,是彼此的倚靠,甚至是这世间唯一的倚靠。如果你真伤害了我,玱玹一定不会原谅你!”
小夭顿了顿,继续说道:“第二条路,却是和第一条截然不同,我们和平相处,你别瞪我!我说的是和平相处,没有说友爱相处!所谓和平相处就是井水不犯河水,承恩宫很大,大得即使多了我一个,只要你不想理会,完全可以一年都不见一次。你可以仔细想一下这条路的结局。父王会欣慰,玱玹依旧宠你护你,你娘也继续平静地生活。”
阿念冷哼,“难道只有两条路?”
小夭笑道:“其实,是有第三条,我们友爱相处,从此你不但有爹爹和哥哥疼,还多了个姐姐宠着你。”
“呸,你做梦!”
小夭摊摊手,无所谓地说:“我知道是做梦,所以压根儿没提。”
阿念低着头,默默沉思,小夭也不说话了。
屋子里安静下来,外面的声音变得刺耳起来,侍女们边哭边叫:“王姬、王姬,你们别打了!求求你们,别打了……陛下,不是已经派人去禀奏陛下了吗?为什么陛下还没派人来……”
半晌后,小夭看阿念的神情已经十分平静,开始继续解阿念身上的纱幔,刚把阿念的手解出来,阿念就用力甩了小夭一耳光,小夭一把把她重重掀翻到地上,举起了拳头,“你还想打啊?那我们继续。”
阿念怒道:“你踹了我肚子一脚,打了我脸一拳,我扇你一个耳光,就算扯平,从此井水不犯河水!”
小夭想了想,收回拳头,“好!”
小夭站起,捡起地上的破衣袍裹到身上,刚要拉开门闩,又回头说道:“你和相柳的事情,只有你我知道,我不会告诉玱玹,你自己也把口封死了。”
小夭拉开了门,侍女们呆呆地看着她。
小夭走回明瑟殿时,侍女们也都呆呆地看着她,胆子大一些的珊瑚结结巴巴地问:“王姬,谁、谁打了你?”
小夭走到水镜前,左脸上一个鲜明的掌印,小夭想着阿念脸上的青紫,笑道:“这宫里除了另一个王姬,还有谁敢打我?不过,我也没让她好过,你们如果想看她的热闹,赶紧去看。”
侍女们依旧呆呆地站着,小夭说:“如果不想去看热闹,就帮我准备洗澡水,我身上一股海腥味,难受得很。”
侍女们这才回神,赶紧去准备沐浴用具,珊瑚还去找了伤药。
小夭洗完澡,上好药,吃了点东西,对侍女叮嘱:“我睡两个时辰,记得到时间一定要叫醒我。”
小夭美美地睡了一觉,睡起后,让侍女帮她准备外出的衣服。
小夭说道:“要舒服点的。”话刚说完,想了想,又加了一句道:“也要好看的,既舒服又好看。”
侍女们都低头偷笑,珊瑚拿起一套栀黄色的衣裙说道:“这衣服虽然要束腰,但只要别像穿礼服时束得那么紧,其实穿着很舒服的。王姬觉得昨晚的穿着难受吗?”
“除了有点累赘外,倒不难受。”小夭笑道:“那就这套了。”
穿好衣服,小夭在镜子前看了看自己,哀叹,有阿念的五指印在,其实是白打扮了!
珊瑚已经给她准备好和衣裙配套的帷帽,小夭戴起帷帽,乘云辇出了宫。
玱玹说丰隆明日离开,想来璟也应该是明日清早就会离开。这一别,再见不知道又是何时,所以小夭想在他走前,再见他一面。
到了瀛州山涂山氏住的庭院,守门的仆役说:“璟公子去逛街了,估摸着是因为明日就要离开,想买些五神山的特产带回去送人。”
小夭本以为璟会休息,没想到他竟然和玱玹他们一道出去了,看来他不想有人知道他昨夜一夜没睡。想起他那两个精怪的狐尾人偶,如果他有心隐瞒,外人倒的确很难确定他的行踪。
没找到人,小夭有些恹恹的,一时又不想回去,只能无聊地去瀛州岛上闲逛。
上一次逛瀛州岛,还是小时候,和现在很是不同,那时的瀛州岛只有一些低等的神族居住,美则美矣,可是没什么生气。现在却有不少人族,时而还能看到妖族,熙来攘往,很是热闹。每个人都生活得平和满足,所以行为举止自然而然非常有礼。
小夭不禁为自己的父王骄傲。回来之后,也许因为长大了,她能感觉到父王并不快乐,但父王说他用所有换取所要,这大概就是父王想要的吧!
小夭看到一套珊瑚做的妆盒,从小到大约摸有十二件,小的可以用来装胭脂粉黛,大的可以用来装发簪首饰。小夭想到侍女珊瑚的名字,想着如果不太贵的话,把这买去送给珊瑚倒是不错。她走过去,拿起一个看了看,做工的确不错,问道:“多少钱?”
店家还没回答,旁边一个女子拿起一个妆盒看了一眼,说道:“这我要了,包起来。”
小夭倒不是非要不可,只是觉得旁边的女子未免太霸道,懒得搭理她,只对店家说道:“是我先看中的东西,先问的价,如果我没说不要,应该不能卖给他人。”
店家对那位女子抱歉地说:“买卖东西的确是如此。”
女子立即说道:“不管她出多少钱,我再给你两倍。”
另一个女子说道:“做工凑合,但珊瑚不好,妹妹若想要这样的东西,回头我命工匠用归墟的珊瑚专门给你雕刻一套。”
小夭听她们声音有点熟悉,这才回头去看,竟然是馨悦和意映。
丰隆和玱玹他们正走过来,身后跟着几个提东西的仆役。馨悦对一个仆役说道:“把这套珊瑚妆盒收起来。”她又转头瞅了一眼小夭,对意映说:“我又不是那没见过好东西的女子,哪里看得上这种玩意儿?不过是看着新奇,买回去赏下人的。”
小夭不擅长用言语压制馨悦这种人,此时,小夭真希望阿念和海棠在,想起当时海棠问馨悦的婢女要一捆扶桑神木的事,小夭不禁笑起来,对馨悦说:“小姐喜欢,就拿去吧。”
玱玹几步赶过来,说:“小夭?竟真是你!你怎么来逛街了?”
小夭道:“我有些无聊,就随便来逛逛。”说着话,偷偷往璟那边看了一眼,看到他黑眸中洋溢着喜悦,小夭也不禁抿着唇角笑起来。
虽然只是两句平常的对话,可玱玹和小夭显得十分亲昵,馨悦警惕地盯了一眼小夭,似笑非笑地对玱玹说:“你的红颜知己倒真是不少,随便逛逛都能碰到一个。”
丰隆和篌都笑起来,玱玹微微咳嗽了一声,向众人介绍道:“你们昨晚不都闹着要见我表妹吗?这位就是我的表妹。”
丰隆一下不笑了,众人也都神色郑重起来。丰隆和小夭见礼,抬起头时,仔细看了小夭一眼,可惜面纱遮掩,看不到纱下的容颜。
小夭向众人回了一礼,暗暗留意涂山篌。本以为那样的人纵使五官好看,气质也应该猥琐,可没想到他竟然出乎意料的俊朗。他和璟的眉眼有五六分像,不过他的更硬朗,透着几分桀骜,唇角有一道淡淡的伤疤,让他即使笑,也带着一分凌厉。
馨悦把那套珊瑚妆盒拿给小夭,笑道:“真是不好意思,因为明日就要走,难得见到一套别致的礼物,所以心急了,这套妆盒还请收下,就算作纪念我们不打不相识。”
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(Part 2 below)
Symbolika1:(Part 2 below)
小夭暗赞,不愧是两大家族培养出的子弟,她看玱玹,玱玹微微颔首,小夭笑着接过,“谢谢你。”
馨悦高兴地说:“逛街市人越多越热闹,不如你和我们一起吧。”
“好啊!”小夭答应了。
几人边逛边说话,小夭的话不多,不过众人都很照顾她,所以一行人倒相处得不错。
馨悦和丰隆又买了不少东西,跟来的侍从手里全都拿得满满当当,馨悦苦笑着说:“你们可别笑我们,我们父母两边都是大家族,来了一趟五神山,如果不带点东西回去,说不过去,可送了甲,就必须送乙。”
篌道:“我们不会笑,只会羡慕。”
馨悦笑起来。
小夭心想,馨悦对篌倒不错,并没有显得和对璟不同。
馨悦说:“不行了,逛不动了,找个地方休息一下吧。”
玱玹笑说:“知道你要不行了,那边有间酒肆,菜做得也不错,反正也快要吃晚饭了,不如我们就在那边喝点酒吃点东西,算作我为各位饯行。”
玱玹带着大家走进了酒肆,酒肆的老板应该认识玱玹,亲自迎了出来,带他们去天井坐。
天井被两层高的屋子围着,四四方方,二楼种了不少藤萝类的花草,可店主人并不让那些藤萝攀援,而是让它们直直地垂落下来,犹如绿色珠帘,有的藤萝上结着鲜红欲滴的朱红果子,有的藤萝上开着紫色、黄色的小花,坐在天井中,满眼青翠烂漫,倒好似坐在了山野中。
馨悦瞅着玱玹笑赞:“是个好地方。”
店主请众人落座,大坐榻上放着一张四方的大几案,要两人一边,小夭不知道玱玹的打算,迟疑间,已经被馨悦笑按在丰隆身边坐下。馨悦坐在小夭左手,和玱玹一边。璟和意映则恰坐在了小夭和丰隆对面。篌独坐了一边,和玱玹对面。
店主上了四五种酒,有浓烈的,也有清淡得像蜜水一般的,又端了七八碟精致的小菜和一些瓜果,由众人选用。
看玱玹点头表示了满意,店主立即退下。
丰隆笑道:“看这架势,你不像客,倒像是主人。”
玱玹笑道:“对你们不敢欺瞒,我的确算是这里的主人,我喜欢酿酒,自己一人喝终究没意思,索性就开了几个店。”
馨悦生了兴趣,叽叽喳喳地询问,意映和篌也时不时插嘴说几句,谈得十分热闹。
丰隆用干净的筷子夹了一小碟小玉瓜给小夭,低声道:“我看你刚才第一口吃的就是这个,应该是爱吃的,却夹得很少,若觉得远了,我帮你夹。”
小夭扫了一眼璟,夹了一块小玉瓜放进嘴里,对丰隆说:“谢谢。”
丰隆几种酒都尝过后,倒了一杯清甜的果子酒给小夭,“你尝尝这个。”
小夭接过后,低声说道:“你和他们聊吧,不必特意照顾我。”
馨悦耳朵尖,插嘴道:“我哥哥平日里可不是这样,别人照顾他,他都不稀罕,更别提照顾别人了。我看他今日也的确有些异样,连对我都从未这么小心体贴过。”
丰隆低斥道:“别胡说!”
馨悦做了个鬼脸,对璟说:“璟哥哥,你和哥哥熟,你说我有没有胡说?”
璟微微笑了笑,“没有胡说。”
丰隆不满,用手指点点璟,对意映说:“好嫂嫂,快帮我堵上他那张嘴。”
意映羞得脸通红,扫了一眼篌,嘴里说着:“别乱叫!”动作却很殷勤,帮璟拿了些距离璟远的小菜,又帮璟倒了酒。
丰隆摇头,笑道:“这可不算堵上!”
玱玹和馨悦都笑着起哄,意映也不介意,双手端起酒盅,递到璟唇边,柔声说道:“请用。”
璟僵坐着,没有动,脸上挂着勉强的笑意。
众人哄笑,丰隆说:“咦?往常也不见你扭捏,今日倒端起来了。”
璟垂着眼,就着意映的手,一口饮尽了酒。
玱玹和丰隆边鼓掌边笑,丰隆赞道:“还是嫂嫂爽快!”
篌也抚掌大笑,意映盯了一眼篌,笑靥如花。
小夭觉得气闷,一口气吃完了碟中的小玉瓜,丰隆立即又帮她夹了一碟。
意映说:“小夭,这里没有外人,戴着帷帽多憋闷,把帽子摘了吧。”
馨悦附和道:“是啊,是啊。”
小夭抱歉地说:“不是不想摘下帽子,而是不知道吃错了什么,脸上突然长了疹子,实在不好见人。”
意映和馨悦都遗憾地叹气,馨悦甚至一边长长地叹气,一边对哥哥说:“不要怪妹妹不帮你,而是老天不帮你。”
店主带着两个婢女,把冷菜都撤了,上了热菜,又拿了几坛酒。
馨悦尝了一口,对玱玹说:“不错。”
玱玹笑道:“得了你的赞,回头我要重赏厨子了。”
众人转而说起了大荒内的各个家族,以及近几十年都有哪些杰出子弟,私下里都喜好些什么。你说几句,我说几句,看似闲聊,却又处处透着玄机。
璟一直沉默,静静地喝着酒,众人大概已习惯他这个样子,都不奇怪。不过,他看似在出神,可每次丰隆或玱玹突然和他说什么,他总能正确地回答,可见他对身边发生的事情一清二楚。
小夭抓了烈酒的酒坛过来,一杯杯地喝着,渐渐地骨头软了,身子如猫一般缩着,一手撑着头,一手端着酒杯。
丰隆新奇地看着她,也不说话,提着酒坛陪她喝,待她喝完一杯,就给她倒一杯,自己也饮一杯,两人好似在拼酒。
玱玹看到了,笑道:“丰隆,你别把我妹妹灌醉了。”
丰隆叹道:“谁灌倒谁还不见得。”
玱玹知道小夭的酒量,笑笑不再说话。到后来,果然是丰隆先醉了,其他人也喝得晕晕乎乎,也不知道谁提议要出海,众人都不反对。
距离酒肆不远处就有个码头,玱玹命人去准备船,众人真乘了船扬帆出海。
到了船上,被海风一吹,都清醒了几分。也许因为明日要离别,可也许更因为年轻,离别只是年少放纵的一个借口,一群人嘻嘻哈哈地我敬你一杯,你再敬我一杯,继续喝酒。
意映喝醉了,拉着馨悦在甲板上跳舞;丰隆看到一尾大鱼游过,说要去海下捉鱼,扑通一声就真跳进了大海。玱玹被吓了一跳,馨悦笑着叫:“不用担心!他可是赤水家的人,一见水就发疯!淹死了谁,也淹不死他!”
玱玹毕竟还是不放心,想找个侍从下海,可一共只来了一个开船的侍从,篌端着酒杯道:“我去陪他捉鱼。”说完,也跳进了大海。
玱玹站在船头张望,意映悬空坐在船舷上,踢踏着双脚,笑着说:“不用担心,他从小到大都不知道猎了多少海兽了,只怕待会儿真要带几条大鱼回来。”
玱玹的酒气上涌,头有些疼。
意映笑问馨悦:“我要去捞月亮,你来吗?”
馨悦摇摇头,指着她说:“你真醉了。”
扑通一声,意映跳进了水里。
馨悦叽叽咕咕地笑,玱玹无力地说:“我应该还是不用担心吧?”
“不知道,我不清楚她的水性,不过,下去不就知道了。”她拉住玱玹,玱玹说:“我不会游水,你知道的。”
“我知道你不会游水。”馨悦的眼睛亮晶晶的,就好似最璀璨的星星,她蛊惑一般地对玱玹说:“随我跳下去!”
玱玹不说话,只是似笑非笑地看着馨悦。馨悦仰着头笑,媚眼如丝,“敢不敢把你的命给我?”说完,她凝视着玱玹,一步步倒退着走到船边,一个倒仰,翻进了海里。
玱玹笑了笑,走过去,干脆利落地也跳进了大海。
小夭端着酒杯,趴在船舷上,笑着又喝了一杯。如果不是昨日夜里被相柳那死魔头逼得在海里泡了一夜,她也真想跳进去。
璟默默走到她身后,小夭回身,滑坐到甲板上,嘲讽道:“现在你敢接近我了?”
璟不吭声,小夭举起空酒杯,璟拿起酒壶,帮她斟了一杯。小夭把酒杯递给他,璟接过,以为是要他喝,刚要喝,小夭半撩开面纱,指指自己的唇。
璟把酒杯凑到小夭唇畔,小夭就着他的手,慢慢地饮完。
酒气上涌,小夭头发沉,两边的太阳穴直跳,胃里也有些翻涌。她知道自己是真醉了,推开璟的手,闭目靠着船舷,等着那股难受劲儿过去。
璟拿了个小药囊,凑在小夭的鼻端,让她嗅着。
小夭道:“你倒是没忘记我教你的东西。”
“永远都不会忘记。”
“看到丰隆对我好,你心里难受吗?”
“难受。”璟沉默了一瞬,慢慢地说,“很难受。”
小夭笑起来,“听到你难受,我倒是挺好受。”
璟的手指轻轻碰了一下她的脸颊,“谁打了你?”
小夭道:“阿念,我踹了她一脚,打了她一拳,扯平。”
璟的指尖凝聚了灵力,轻抚着小夭脸上的红肿,小夭推开他的手,“你娘的眼光不错,防风意映会是个很好的妻子,你和她很般配。”
璟脸上的血色一点点褪去,他垂下了头,喃喃说:“我就知道早上是在做梦,我开心了一整天,下午在街头见到你时,我以为你是来看我的,我真的很开心,真的很开心……”
璟呆呆地坐在甲板上,无声无息。
小夭想起刚被她救回医馆的十七,从不发出任何声音,总是无声无息地躺着,小六给他什么他接受什么,既不表达痛,也不表达饿或渴。有时候小六觉得他已经死了,用手去摸他的脖子,直到感受到他的脉搏,小六才会相信这个人还活着。
小夭只觉心里搅得难受,一阵翻江倒海,忙站起趴在船栏上,哇一声吐了出来。
璟轻抚着她的背,待她吐完,又把水递给她,让她漱口。
小夭头重脚轻、耳鸣目沉,璟扶着她,小心翼翼地让她坐下。
璟把她脸上的碎发往后拢,小夭突然抱住了他的腰,喃喃说:“我今天下午真的是去看你的,不信你回去问看门的仆役。我去找你,没找到,才去街上乱逛的。”
璟紧搂着小夭,额头抵在小夭的头发上,只觉短短一会儿,他跌落了深渊,正以为万劫不复时,却又飞上了云端。
他感觉小夭身子直往下滑,低头看她,她竟然醉睡了过去。璟忍不住笑,他调整了一下姿势,让小夭靠躺在他怀里。
海风轻轻吹动,海潮轻轻摇动着船,他望着天上的圆月,只想就这么过一夜。
璟看了一眼身旁的酒坛,将一只手放在酒坛上,只见白烟从酒坛中逸出,渐渐地笼罩了整艘船。从外面看过来,整艘船像被大海吞噬了,什么都再看不见。
璟低头看着熟睡的小夭,手指轻轻地抚摸着她脸上的伤痕,又一点点用指尖描摹着她的轮廓。一遍遍描摹,直到纵使他被剜去双目,依旧能清晰地看见她。
一个多时辰后,小夭轻轻动了下,喃喃叫:“十七。”迷迷糊糊地睁开眼睛。
璟微笑地看着她,小夭说:“我好像睡了一觉。”
“嗯。”
“他们还没回来?”
“没有。”
小夭感叹:“平时一个比一个老成稳重,没想到竟是一群疯子。”
璟对小夭说:“我对意映无心,意映对我也绝对无情,这次回去后,我就会和奶奶说取消婚约。”
“嗯?嗯……”小夭的脑子还晕着,一瞬后,才反应过来,“你怎么知道?她对你那么温柔体贴……”
璟打断了她,“小夭,我曾经遇到过不少对我有意的女子,我明白女人真正动情时看男人的目光,不管意映举动多温柔体贴,却从未那样看过我。而且,我现在……”璟抚了抚小夭的鬓角,“我知道渴望得到一个人的感觉。我不会判断错!”
小夭轻嘘了口气:“那就好。”
璟很是心酸,小夭没有亲眼看到,私下无人时意映看他的眼神,所以小夭总不相信他是残缺的,总不相信意映会嫌弃他,她以为他在别人眼中和在她眼中一样。
小夭忽然间想到什么,兴奋地坐了起来。“既然她不要你,你回来做我的十七吧!”她的眼眸熠熠生辉,“你当年不是说担心不回去的话,涂山篌那个疯子会伤害我和老木他们吗?可是玟小六已经失踪了,我现在是高辛王姬,涂山篌伤害不了我,你可以到我身边做十七。”
璟凝视着小夭,沉默不语,眼中有哀伤。
小夭渐渐冷静了,自嘲地说:“我是不是又说了傻话?”璟已经失踪过一次,如果再来一次,别说篌,只怕涂山家的太夫人不见尸体都不会罢休。
璟低声道:“你没说傻话,只是有些事情变化了。我回去之后,才发现大哥正把涂山家带入危险中,如果我就这么走了,我怕他会毁掉整个涂山氏。小夭,给我一些时间,好吗?让我想办法安排好一切。”其实,不仅仅是整个家族的安危,有些话他没有办法说出口。如果眼前的人还是玟小六,他只需是叶十七,隐居在一个小镇上,他们就可以相伴一生,可她是高辛王姬。当看到那一场盛大的拜祭仪式时,他就明白了,他们俩都回不去了。有资格守在小夭身旁的男人绝不会是一个藏头缩尾的男人,他要想一世陪伴小夭,就必须取消婚约,以涂山璟的身份,堂堂正正地走到小夭身旁。
小夭笑了笑,低声说:“你有十五年的时间。璟,你打算怎么办?”
“我也不知道,但我知道我一定会回到你身边,因为我答应过要一辈子听你的话,所以……”璟的额头抵着小夭的额头,虔诚地祈祷:“请为我守住你的心。”
小夭的指头插进他的头发中,笑着抓他的头发,“我已经看出来了,你是个狡猾的人。就算我想忘记,你也会不停地变着法子提醒我,一边说着不敢奢望,一边却又绝不松手。”
璟的声音很痛苦,喃喃说:“我只是……没有办法……我知道你值得更好的,可是我没有办法……对不起……”
小夭忙说:“我明白、我明白。”
璟低声说:“你不明白。”
小夭很老实地承认:“是不明白,可我总得说点什么安慰你啊!”
璟轻声笑起来,叹息道:“他们要回来了。”
小夭看看天色,“天都快亮了,也该回来了。”
璟又看了一会儿小夭,要把帷帽给小夭戴上,小夭抓住了他的手,不让他戴,咬着唇,闭上了眼睛。
璟轻轻地吻住了小夭的额心,直到不得不离开,他才抬起头,把帷帽给小夭戴上。
小夭躲到了船舱后,整理头发和衣裙,听到馨悦、玱玹、丰隆的说话声,小夭一抬头,却看见璟的头发刚被她十指插进去,抓得乱七八糟。此时连提醒璟都已经来不及,更何况整理头发,小夭的脸色变了。
却看璟一边站起,一边随手解开了束发的发冠,满头青丝如银河泻九天,披落在他背上,飘散在海风中。他侧倚着船栏,几分慵懒、几分随意地看着东边天空初露的晨曦。
小夭一瞬间看得心如鹿撞,怦怦直跳。玱玹叫了她好几声,她都没有听到,惹得所有人都看着她。
玱玹推了她一把,“你在想什么?”
小夭忙道:“啊,你们回来了。”脸刹那涨得通红,幸亏有面纱遮住,没有人能看到。
璟却似乎明白了,眼中飞溅着喜悦。
馨悦叽叽呱呱地抱怨,说他们记错了船的位置,找了好大一圈才找到船,又担忧地说,一直没碰到意映和篌,希望他们别出什么事情。
正在抱怨,看到意映向着船游来,馨悦哈哈大笑,跑到船边,把意映拉上去,“你是不是也没找到船?”
意映愣了一下,笑道:“是啊。”
璟说道:“船舱里有清粥小菜,你们如果饿了,就先吃点。”
几个游了一夜水的人都进了船舱,小夭和璟也跟了进去。
丰隆问小夭,“要喝点清粥吗?”
小夭忙道:“我自己来,你吃你的吧。”
玱玹似笑非笑地瞅着她,小夭瞪了玱玹一眼:你也好意思来嘲笑我?
意映和馨悦也不知道是因为累了,还是困了,都十分沉默。小夭也不想说话,只听见丰隆和玱玹偶尔交谈一句。
待几人吃完,侍从要开船时,篌仍没回来。
馨悦担心地说:“篌哥哥不会出事吧?”
丰隆看向璟,璟道:“以他的能力,应该不会有事,我让小狐去找找他。”璟说着话,从他的袖中跑出一只像是烟雾凝结的九尾狐狸,九尾狐却没有离开,而是朝着一个方向叫了一声,又缩回了璟的袖中,消失不见。
璟道:“篌要回来了。”
不一会儿,只见篌从远处飞驰而来,脚下踩着一条凶猛的大鱼。他上半身赤裸着,露出紧致的古铜色肌肤,衣服被他撕成一缕缕,做成了一条缰绳,像马笼头一般勒着大鱼的头,他双手拉着缰绳,驱策着大鱼在海中驰骋。朝阳在他身后冉冉升起,篌浑身上下都散发着男性最纯粹的阳刚魅力。
馨悦和意映都扭过了头,假装被别处的风景吸引,小夭却目不转睛地看着篌,带着几分欣羡,扬声问道:“它听话吗?”
篌笑着没说话,只是策着大鱼,灵活地围着船绕行了一圈。小夭不禁鼓掌喝彩,笑道:“这个好玩,以后我也找个这样的坐骑,就不用辛苦游泳了。”
玱玹嘲笑道:“别做梦了,就你的灵力还能制服这种鱼怪?它拿你做点心还差不多。”
小夭叹气,也是。
篌一手握着缰绳,一手朝着鱼身的某处一拳击下,手探进了鱼腹内,掏出一个鸽子蛋般大的血红宝石,就着海水洗干净血污,跃上了船。
那块血红的宝石晶莹剔透,在阳光下发出璀璨的光芒。馨悦的眼睛一亮,对篌说:“篌哥哥,能把它转让给我吗?”她虽然说的是转让,但她难得开口要东西,以篌的脾气,肯定就直接送给她了。
但是,馨悦没有想到,篌抱歉地笑笑,说道:“这块鱼丹红我有用,回头我让人再找给你。”
馨悦勉强地笑笑,什么都没说,走到意映身旁,和她一块儿张望着朝阳下的大海。
人已到齐,玱玹下令开船,船向着瀛州的码头驶去。
篌进船舱去洗漱换衣,小夭问丰隆:“那是什么宝石?”
丰隆笑道:“这船上有涂山家的人在,我可不敢谈宝石。”他扬声把立在船尾的璟叫来,“璟,小夭想知道篌猎取的鱼丹红是什么宝石。”
璟走到小夭身旁,解释道:“其实,那就是深海鱼怪的内丹,鱼怪的内丹色泽鲜艳,人们根据它们最主要的颜色叫做鱼丹红、鱼丹紫……鱼丹红是最常见的鱼丹,可纯净到像这块这样一丝杂色都没有的,却极其罕见。鱼丹可以做首饰、佩饰,还可以入药。如果是品级好的鱼丹,炼制成宝器,含在嘴中,可以延长人在水下的时间。”
本来璟说话时,小夭就走神了,可听到最后一句,突然有了兴趣,“什么算品级好?刚才的那块算是吗?”
“颜色越纯净,品级就越好,刚才的那块算是最好的鱼丹了。”
丰隆对小夭说:“这种东西可遇不可求,你若想要,我回去问问爷爷。”
小夭忙道:“我就是看着好看,随口问问。”
朝阳下的大海犹如撒了金粉,闪耀着万点金光,一群群白色海鸟在海面上盘旋,倏忽来去。
一时间,三人都眺望着壮阔美丽的大海,默默不语。
小夭仗着有帷帽遮掩,偷偷地看璟。
璟很快就察觉了,垂下眼眸,唇角抿着笑意。小夭也笑,虽然不能说一句话,甚至不能站得太近,可又觉得心意相通,很亲密。
船靠岸了,众人都下了船。
丰隆和璟他们的侍从早已把行李收拾好,运到了赤水家的大船上,他们只需再登上船,就可以从水路返回中原。
玱玹带着小夭和众人一一告别,有长袖善舞、能言善道的玱玹在,小夭只需行礼、道谢,说再会。
和丰隆、馨悦道别时,馨悦眼眶有点红,和哥哥一边上船,一边还回头看玱玹。和篌道别时,篌洒脱地抱抱拳,转身上了船。和璟、意映道别时,玱玹和意映两个能说会道的依依话别,璟和小夭都沉默着。
璟走上了船,站在船栏旁,看着小夭。
船开了,玱玹向他们挥手,小夭却只是静静地站着,海风吹得她的面纱贴在脸上,露出隐约的轮廓,一袭栀黄的衣衫,亭亭玉立,犹如朝阳下迎风而开的一朵栀子花。
璟一直凝视着她,直到她消失在海天间,他才缓缓闭上了眼睛。小夭、小夭……
玱玹和小夭乘云辇回承恩宫。
玱玹把小夭的帷帽拿下,摇头叹气,“你居然被阿念扇了一耳光?我得去看看她被你打成什么样了。”
小夭道:“我和她之间的问题基本解决了,至于将来会如何,就看两人间的机缘了。”
玱玹含着丝笑,说道:“我刚问了船上的侍从,他居然和我说昨夜睡着了,你和璟玩得可好?”
小夭笑瞅着玱玹,反问道:“某人连命都不要地跳进了海里,玩得可好?”
玱玹不在意地说:“如果我只是青龙部的一个普通子弟,她再意动,也不过是逗着我玩。我不动心,是不知好歹,我动心,是痴心妄想,反正都是她解闷的乐子,现在她想玩真的,那就拭目以待呗!”
小夭困惑地问:“你们男人是如何判断出一个女人是真心还是假意呢?即使是真心,又如何知道这真心是哪种真心呢?要知道真心也分很多种,有的真心要一点波折没有;有的真心能经历八十难,八十一难就不行了;有的真心只能共贫贱;有的真心只能共富贵;有的真心平时看不到,大难时却显了;有的真心平时相敬相护,大难时却飞鸟各投林。这世间很多白头到老的男女,其实并不见得是真的一心一意、坚不可摧,只是没有碰到考验罢了。”
玱玹笑起来,“你这一串子话绕得我脑袋都疼了。你要问我具体如何判断,我也没什么可说的,不过是感觉罢了。一颗冷心、一双冷眼,经历得多了,自然看得分明。”
小夭问:“万一看错了呢?万一错把只能经历八十一难的真心,看作了百折不变、千险不改的呢?”
玱玹温柔地说:“保证不会犯错的方法你知道的,就是一颗冷心。”
小夭笑皱皱鼻子,“我以为你有什么好方法呢!”
“我没有,我想就连咱们那位精明冷静到让人恐惧的祖父也没有法子真正看透人心。”
小夭无奈地淡笑,“轩辕王!”
玱玹说:“奶奶、爹娘、姑姑,还有大伯和二伯的墓已经太多年没有人祭拜,也不知道荒凉成什么样子了。明年,姑姑的忌日,我要站在朝云峰上。”
小夭的眼中浮出隐隐的泪花,点了下头,“好!”
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(translation with DeepL below)
Symbolika1:(translation with DeepL below)
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Xiao Yao didn't know exactly how long had passed, she only knew that her eyes regained a bit of vision when her hand touched a hard object and instinctively grasped it.
Seeing that it was a piece of reef, Xiao Yao's entire body immediately went limp, and as she lay on her back, she saw a pitch-black silhouette standing stubbornly on the top of the reef rock in the distance.
At this time, the sky was already cloudy, in the cold morning sun, that long silhouette seemed to have fused with the reef, set between heaven and earth, becoming a waiting for the end of the world.
Xiao Yao also do not know whether it is tired, or joy, the throat is astringent, can not make a sound, she feebly raised her hand, as if in the wave, but all did not move.
Finally, the man on the rock wall saw her, not caring about the shore, he leapt off the rock wall, jumped into the sea, swam to Xiaoyao side, picked her up. The two were half immersed in the sea water, Xiao Yao's body was trembling because of her strength, but Jing didn't know why, his body was also trembling.
Both of them trembled so much that they couldn't speak, and Xiao Yao could hear her upper and lower teeth fighting. She felt funny and depressed, having made up carefully, she didn't expect to appear in the most lousy position.
Xiao Yao winced and said, "Don't, don't ...... go in the water." After soaking in seawater all night, she really didn't want to soak anymore.
Jing climbed up the reef with her in his arms, but after hobbling a few steps, he unexpectedly slipped and fell downwards. Jing was afraid of hurting Xiaoyao, and used his own back to land, thumping and falling.
Xiao Yao laughed, "You, you ...... also nine ...... fox ...... stupid ...... "
Finally arrived at the shore, Jing held Xiaoyao walked to the rock wall under the wind, Xiaoyao face pale, lips black, Jing one hand against her back heart, one hand holding her palm, the spiritual power slowly lost in, slowly in her body to swim a few circles, Xiaoyao's body only stopped trembling.
At this time, it was already bright outside, but this tiny corner under the rock wall was still gloomy because of the cover of the reef and the woods.
Jing looked at Xiao Yao's body warmed up, retracted the hand placed on her back heart, felt that he should also let go of the hand holding her hand, but couldn't let go, his hand was momentarily loosened and momentarily tightened. Xiao Yao looked at him and teased, "You used to be bold, but now you're even timid?"
Jing loosened his hand, "Now is different from before."
"What's different?"
Jing glanced at her and sharply lowered his eyes again. Xiao Yao touched her messy wet hair and pinched her cheeks, she guessed that her face couldn't look any better, she was very frustrated and decided that she really needed to go back and teach Ah Nian a hard lesson. Xiao Yao stood up, "I'm going back."
Jing hurriedly stood up, pulling her arm, and immediately let go like an electric shock, face a little hot. Gao Xin's clothes were light and airy, and when they were soaked, they obediently stuck to her body, she didn't feel it when she sat shrunken just now, but when she stood up at this moment, all of a sudden, her waist was her waist, and her breasts were her breasts, and she could see it extraordinarily distinctly.
Seeing Jing's expression, Xiao Yao looked down at herself and immediately squatted down, clasping her hands around her knees and covering herself tightly.
Jing sat across from her, and after using his spiritual energy to help her dry her clothes, he whispered, "Go back later, okay? Just for a while."
Xiao Yao didn't say anything.
"I waited for you all night, thinking you wouldn't come."
Xiao Yao asked in exasperation, "If you thought I wouldn't come, why did you still wait?"
Jing didn't know how to answer, if she really didn't come, he didn't know where he could go, in the depths of this earth, he had the happiest and sweetest moments. But the person who gave him happiness and sweetness was Xiao Liu, not this young girl in front of him, if she took it back, he understood completely.
Xiao Yao kneeled down on both knees and knelt in front of him, her eyes full of annoyance and aggression, ''Do you think it's hard for you to wait all night? You have a fiancée! You go in and out with her, but you change your ways to remind me every moment that I made a promise to you. If you don't believe me, why do you want me to make a promise? Let me tell you, last night I almost died trying to keep my promise to you!" Xiao Yao pushed King fiercely, "I'm done, I take back my promise! You get the hell back to Qing Qiu and go marry Windproof Yi Ying!"
Jing didn't dare to fight back, but he was also determined not to back off, "I won't marry her, she doesn't actually like me and shouldn't be willing to marry me."
Xiao Yao stopped shoving, "I don't believe it! Why would she not like you?"
"I have a crippled leg, and I can see she's surprised and disappointed. Once, she saw the scars on my body and was shocked ...... " In fact, saying shocked is a very subtle way of saying that Yi Ying was pale and scared, she didn't dare to look at him for a second, and since then, when the two of them were alone, Yi Ying would keep her distance from him.
Xiao Yao had a hard time, she knew that Jing's legs were inconvenient, and she also knew that the scars on Jing's body were a bit scary, but that shouldn't be a reason for him to be disliked. Xiao Yao said, "You've been engaged for decades, could it be that she still cares about these external things?"
"In fact, I had absolutely no idea what she actually looked like before I met her in Clearwater Town, and we've never met. She was the person picked by my mother, and at that time, my mother was already sick, so I didn't want my mother to worry about my marriage anymore, and I immediately agreed. After the engagement, I had to take care of my mother and deal with the affairs of the clan, I was too busy to think much about this matter, but it was my elder brother who quietly slipped away to look at the defence against the wind Yi Ying, and came back and said to me with a smile ''congratulations, it is indeed a flowery and intelligent woman''. After my mother's death, I had to deal with a broken-down big brother, and was in no mood to think about any male-female affairs. After Grandma revealed the secret of Big Brother's birth, I was even more unmotivated to think about it. It wasn't until everything calmed down and Grandma said it was time for me to get married that I remembered I had a fiancée. Grandma was already old, my sister-in-law looked like she didn't exist, and the Tu Shan Clan did need a mistress to help Grandma share her worries. After discussing with the elders, Grandma chose a wedding date, and I didn't realise that before the wedding was even held, I was secluded by Big Brother."
It turned out that the meeting in Qing Shui Town was actually his first encounter with Fangfeng Yiying, then it is no wonder that Fangfeng Yiying would be disappointed ...... Xiao Yao s heart was mixed, some sour and difficult, and some happy, and he did not know what he was actually thinking.
After half a day, Xiao Yao said quietly: ''MissFangfeng Yiying, is indeed a flowery face, and people are capable. It's normal to be a little picky in your eyes, so don't take it to heart."
"You, are the most beautiful." Jing said and immediately lowered her head.
"Even now?"
"Hmm."
Xiaoyao puffed out a laugh, "I finally understand why tinkling jades' flowery words are invincible to young girls, even though I know what you say isn't the truth, I still like to hear it."
"What I said is the truth. Xiao Yao, I didn't expect you to be like this, if I knew you were like this ...... even in the dark dungeon, I would never have had the courage to speak extravagantly ......" Jing's back was straight, but his head was hung low, as if he were a plant that My body, my voice ...... Do you know why I refused to heal my leg even though I knew it could be healed? Because I knew that even if it was healed, the real wound was still inside the body, and that no medicine could cure it. I can wear clothes to hide the ugly scars, I can use rare medicines to heal my leg, and I can speak as little as possible to hide my ugly voice. I can deceive everyone, I am still the magnificent and outstanding Qingqiu Gongzi, but I can t deceive myself ...... Xiao Yao, I don t deserve you! In this world, there are many healthy, intelligent and handsome male children ......"Jing, raise your head! Tushan Jing, raise your head."
Jing slowly raised his head, and Xiao Yao's face came up to the side of his face, murmuring and whispering, "Last night, a man forced me to kiss him, but now I just want to kiss you." Her lips gently landed on Jing's lips, Jing's body trembled dramatically and jerked back, avoiding Xiao Yao, "Don't ...... Xiao Yao."
Xiao Yao closed her eyes and tilted her head, her cheeks flushed, her body trembling lightly, "Jing ...... Jing ......"
Xiao Yao's light call trembled so much that it was almost impossible to hear what she was calling for, Jing felt as if he was trembling as well, his kiss fell on the scarlet on Xiao Yao's forehead, it was as if there was a ball of fire that burned all the way from Xiao Yao's forehead to his heart, warming his cold heart, perhaps sooner or later one day, those wounds that were hidden in his body and had no cure would also recover.
Jing hugged Xiao Yao tightly, his head buried in the middle of Xiao Yao's neck, as if he was dreaming of joy, making him just want to hold Xiao Yao forever and never let go.
Xiao Yao moaned, "You're about to strangle me to death."
Jing immediately let go of her, his face flushed red. Xiao Yao laughed softly and leaned her head on his arm, looking at him.
Jing was embarrassed and slightly inclined his head, "Just now you said you almost died last night, and said ......"Xiao Yao waved her hand unconcernedly, "I scared you by talking in anger."
Jing looked at Xiao Yao, puzzled in his heart, but knew that Xiao Yao did not want to mention it anymore.
Xiao Yao smiles and asks, "Why not here?" She pointed to her lips.
Jing whispered, "It's not time yet."
"Then when will ...... it be okay." Xiao Yao half closed her eyes and covered her face with her hands to hide her shyness.
Jing couldn't answer, because that was up to her, not him. It wasn't that he didn't desire it, but - he wanted her love, he didn't want her to do it just out of pity, Sayo had already given him too much and he didn't want to keep taking advantage of her kindness.
Xiao Yao peeked at him through the cracks of his fingers, "I thought that when you men saw a woman, you all hated to immediately flip over to the couch and stripped naked ......," Xiao Yao couldn't go on, since she changed back to her daughter's body, unknowingly she couldn't afford to be as unashamed and shameless as Xiao Liu. Especially now, it is even more hate to swallow back the words just said.
Although Jing has always been clean, but after all, is in charge of a family of people, in and out of the sex places is common, and the children of the big families are inevitably some of the declaration of lust and indulgence, Jing naturally is a man should know all the things know. In the business world, not to mention more explicit words than this, or even more explicit things have seen, but did not have any feeling, talking and laughing as usual. But to Xiao Yao, only feel the fire burning uncomfortable, low voice defence: "I, not that."
Both of them are silent, there is a trace of shyness in the embarrassment, and there is a faint delight in the embarrassment.
"Xiao Yao ...... Xiao Yao ......," came the cry ofZhuan Xu. The two were startled like they were thieves and immediately separated. Xiao Yao made a shushing gesture to Jing, signalling him to keep quiet and hide.
Xiao Yao casually raked her hair, burrowed into the bushes, circled around to the reef, and waved at Zhuan Xu, "Here it is!"
Zhuan Xu ran over quickly, "Why are you in this sorry state?" Saying that he immediately took off his outer robe and draped it over Xiao Yao.
Xiao Yao said, "Why have I turned into this appearance? It's not because you're a good sister, I'm going back to clean up Ah Nian."
Zhuan Xu summoned the cloud carriage and helped Xiao Yao on board, "I thought you were planning to hold back all the time."
Xiao Yao glanced in the direction of the rock wall and boarded the vehicle, "If we don't teach her a lesson, next time I'm afraid she'll do something that will cause Father and you pain."
"What exactly did she do?"
Xiao Yao smiled mysteriously, "This is a matter between our sisters, so you should stay out of it." If Jing knew that Ah Nian had dared to collude with Xiangliu to set her up, Jing would be furious.
The Zhuan Xu asked, "Have you seen Jing?"
"Yes.""What did you ...... talk about?"
"Just casually chatted, well ...... he said something about him and FafengYi Ying, and also chatted a little bit about something else."
Zhuan Xu said with a wry smile, "Casual chatting, chatting all night without returning to the palace?"
Xiao Yao justifiably asked back, "Do I look like someone who comfortably played all night? If it wasn't for your good sister, I would have gone back to the palace to sleep long ago."
Zhuan Xu twisted her hair to see that it was filled with seaweed and sand again, shaking her head and laughing, "It really doesn't seem like you've suffered much, you've finally suffered at the hands of Ah Nian for once. You also don't call me my good sister in one breath, in terms of far and near, that's your sister!"
Xiao Yao drooped her face and sighed, suddenly remembering something, she asked, "That Tushanhou, what do you think?"
"Not bad."
Xiao Yao exuded interest, and Zhuan Xu could only explain in detail,
"He's very talented in person, and he's more rigid and domineering than Jing, and I heard that during those years when Jing disappeared, he was in charge of a lot of things in the Tushan family, and he did a great job, but it's a shame that he had to back down once Jing returned. I think it's very strange, they are twins, instu is the eldest son, and his talent is not inferior to Jing, so he should have a more important position. But it's strange, the Tushan family obviously values Jing more, and Feng Long and the others don't seem to take him too seriously, especially Feng Long, who seems polite and courteous, but that politeness and courtesy is actually very hard to bear compared to his familiarity with Jing. The circle of the children of the family seems to be very complicated and difficult to enter, but it is very simple, the attitude of a few key people can decide everything, such as their circle, Fenglong and Jing showed that they valued me, and other people will naturally give me a few points of respect. Hou was a bit more miserable, although Fenglong accepted him because he was a Tushan Clan, he obviously didn't really approve of him. However, I have a feeling that hou is by no means someone who is willing to live under people forever, he's just being patient, and I see ambition in his eyes."Xiao Yao nodded, "It feels like you don't have a bad impression of him."
A moment of tinkling of gems smiled to himself, "Because he's actually in a bit of a similar situation to me. We are both enduring, we are both waiting for the right time to be able to kill our opponents with a single strike, and we are both eager to prove ourselves to everyone."
Xiao Yao's complexion became grave, and a moment later Zhuan Xu said, "Don't worry, if Jing didn't have some tactics, Feng Long wouldn't have valued and trusted him so much, in fact, as long as Jing was willing, he could have made the first move and got rid of instr. But I don't know what he thinks, he's hesitant to do it." Jinkong patted her shoulder and laughed, "Seeing that you saved Jing's life, as long as Jing didn't offend you, I will keep an eye on hou, and I suspect that ......" Zhuan Xu narrowed his eyes and sneered, "hou is colluding with Uncle Wang. ."
Xiao Yao was relieved for a few moments, frowning, "Has the FanFeng Clan also defected to Uncle and the others?"
"Looking at the actions of the Defence FanFengYi Ying, it should be. Otherwise, how would a FanFeng Clan dare to kill me repeatedly? Aren't those elders of ours the ones in this world who must want me dead?"
Xiao Yao sighed, "I really admire you guys, one of you wants to kill the other, but you can still play together without any problems, talking and laughing."
Zhuan Xu smirked, "Don't you think this is also a kind of fun?"
Xiao Yao laughed out loud, "Indeed!"
The cloud carriage stopped, Xiao Yao jumped out of the carriage, but she did not intend to enter the hall, and instructed her maid, "Bring me some random raggedy clothes."
The maid busily ran in and brought a piece of clothing that had been destroyed by Ah Nian to Xiao Yao, Xiao Yao threw the tinkling of gems' outer robe back to him, wrapped the tattered clothing around her body, and was about to leave.
The moment of tinkling of gems called out, "Aren't you going to change your clothes before going to settle the score with Ah Nian?"Xiao Yao turned back, shook her hair that was mixed with seaweed and sand, and said, "That's what I want!"
A moment of tinkling of gems laughed, "Then I don't care about you guys, I'm going to look for Fenglong and Xinyue, they're leaving tomorrow."
Xiao Yao waved her hand as she walked away, "You go find your fun, I'll go find mine."
Xiao Yao kicked open the door of Ah Nian's hall and walked in, it was estimated that last night Ah Nian was worried about her heart and didn't sleep well, she hadn't risen yet at this moment.
The maids of honour have blocked Xiao Yao, "Great Wang Ji, the second Wang Ji has not yet risen, if you have something ......"
Xiao Yao hands and feet together, crackling all kicked and pushed open. Haitang blocked the door, Xiao Yao said, "What? You still want to fight me?"
Haitang knelt down, "Slave girl doesn't dare." But she just wouldn't let go.
Xiao Yao cursed, "Ah Nian, if you have the guts to do it, you should have the guts to admit it! What's the point of hiding behind a slave girl? You coward!"
Ah Nian pulled open the door and said to Haitang, "Get out of the way, I want to see what she dares to do, if she really has the guts, she will kill me today, only then will I be able to convince her!"
A few maidservants advised, "First Wangji, Second Wangji, you ......"
Xiao Yao and Ah Nian shouted in unison, "Get lost!"The maidservants were busy pulling Haitang aside and Xiao Yao said to Ah Nian, "If you have the guts to invite me in, let's see what I'll do to you."
Ah Nian coldly grunted and got out of the way.
Xiao Yao walked in and chained the door. She pointed at herself, "Are you satisfied with what you combined with others to make me like this?"
Ah Nian sits down with a flourish and picks up the water to try to drink, "It's quite satisfactory."
Xiao Yao picked up the kettle on the case and splashed a whole pot of water on her face, "You brainless thing!"
Ah Nian jumped up, "You, you ...... I won't be Gao Xin Yi if I don't beat you half to death today." She waved her hand, but found that the spiritual power seemed to have disappeared, not to mention the ice stick, not even a single ice slag came out.
Xiao Yao hooked her hand at her, "Don't just talk without practising!"
Ah Nian casually picks up a jade ru and goes to smash Xiao Yao like she's wielding a stick, Xiao Yao picks up her phoenix qin and fights with her. When the jade ru broke, Ah Nian grabbed a half-human-high gilt twined lotus flower water mirror and smashed it fiercely towards Xiao Yao, smashing her phoenix qin to pieces.
Xiao Yao grabbed a bunch of fat powder boxes, smashing Ah Nian while dodging, "You brute cow, you have some strength."
Xiao Yao jumped to the case, Ah Nian smashed several cases to pieces.
Xiao Yao hid next to the shelf, and took the vase and book to smash Ah Nian, Ah Nian swept across with the water mirror, and smashed the whole shelf over.
Xiao Yao retreated to the side of the couch, Ah Nian forced his way over, "I'll see where else you can escape?"In her anger, Ah Nian had already forgotten the importance of lightness, she smashed the water mirror fiercely at Xiao Yao, only wanting to make this person disappear from her world.
Xiao Yao jumped up like an ape and climbed on top of the couch to avoid the fatal blow. As she fell, she forcefully ripped off the entire veil tent, and the overlapping veils fell on Ah Nian. These veils are either water and fire invulnerable shark raw silk, or swords can not cut the coiled silk spider veil, Ah Nian tugged half a day, not only did not pull apart, on the contrary, more and more tightly entangled himself.
Xiao Yao rushed to her belly kicked hard, Ah Nian fell heavily on the ground, the back of the head hit the floor, pain face green.
Xiao Yao rode and sat on top of her, "Gao Xin Yi, this is you! Lose your spiritual power and you can't do anything! Lose your identity and you're nothing!"
Tears welled up in Nian's eyes, "You think you're better than me? If your mother wasn't Xuanyuan's royal concubine, would Zhuan Xu care about you? If you weren't the granddaughter of King Xuanyuan, would others think you're better than me? Apart from your bloodline being nobler than mine, what else makes you better than me? I've at least worked hard on my own and my spiritual power is higher and stronger than yours, but what about you? You say that you are the disciple of the Queen Mother, but you can't even beat the most ordinary demons! If it weren't for your status, would Father have held a grand ceremony for you? Do you think the guests of the Great Wasteland are just here to see you? Let me tell you, no! They are here because your father is King Gao Xin, your mother is King Xuanyuan's concubine, your maternal grandfather is King Xuanyuan, and your master is the Queen Mother! Apart from these identities, you're actually even more worthless than me!"
So this is Ah Nian's inferiority complex, Xiao Yao contemplated for a moment and said, "You're actually resenting your mother for being too insignificant in her origins!"
Ah Nian roared like a madman, "I didn't! I didn't! My mother is the best in the world, don't you dare say that about my mother ......"
Ah Nian struggled to get up, Xiao Yao gave her a punch on the nose, beating her tears and snot all out, then struggling to stay still, Xiao Yao pressed on her chest and said: "You still dare not admit it? Aren't you just resentful because of your mother? Although you are better than me in everything, it is because your mother is just a woman with a lowly status, not only lowly, but also deaf and mute, so you appear to be inferior to me in every way. Are you thinking that if you were the disciple of the Queen Mother, you wouldn't know how high your spiritual power is? Are you thinking that if you were King Xuanyuan's granddaughter, you would never be as useless as me?"
(continue)
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