Bhavna

The FL is derpy, annoying, and ruins the show

My ratings are primarily based on the weakest link which also happens to be the most integral role in the show- the female lead. I can’t say enough how poor the casting here was. Ok I get that the female lead character Nastumi is supposed to be “quirky” or whatever, but there’s a difference between adorably quirky and downright weird. If I could describe her acting in one word, it would be: Ridiculous and idiotic. I guess the actress is trying too hard to be relatable or whatever in the old period drama, but her expressions and acting are totally unnatural. She ends up looking like a total weirdo in most of her scenes, and it’s so offputting. It’s the actress that’s the problem- in her other show Takane No Hana, where she plays the younger sister, she was a little more low key with her expressions, but still looked like an insecure mess. But in this series with her playing the lead role, she’s a downright disaster. My low rating is primarily because of her horrible acting job, that makes the rest of the cast look out of place next to her as well. I get that her character Natsumi is inexperienced in romance etc. but her expressions are so exaggerated and overacted, like she’s having a heart attack multiple times a day, that she leaves nothing, no subtlety in her performance whatsoever. Even in the romantic scenes where you’re supposed to feel the magic of their connection, she ruins the moment with her awful derpy expressions. She acts like Mr. Bean- even his facial expressions and body language are more graceful than hers. When she’s trying to be cute, she wrinkles up her nose and squints her eyes and juts her teeth out, and sometimes does this weird wide eyed blinking thing with sound effects- it’s not cute or natural- it looks forced and scary. Seriously stop that!

There are scenes around episode 5-6 where Natsumi sticks her head into this other single lady’s business just so she can witness a love matchmaking situation because she’s bored and needs excitement in her own life. Just like many typical housewives tales where they spend so much thought and energy to set up other people so they can land in the same marital bondage as the rest. Even the husband says “You seem to be really enjoying this…” yes because she has nothing else to do in life. And this is how a nosy, toxic housewife is born. It’s really not cute.

Episode 6: there’s a scene when Natsumi and her husband meet a childhood friend, and the friend talks about a man in the past that Natsumi was searching for to thank him, and Natsumi looks flustered trying to stop the friend from talking so that it wouldn’t upset her husband, but she follows her friend around with an expression and body language as if she desperately needs to use the bathroom. Very poorly done. Another star off for poor acting of the female lead.

Actually the male actor is much better- though his character Takimasa is also inexperienced in romance, his expressions and mannerisms are much more natural looking and he is far more likable. But the two together are an odd pairing and come across more like neurotic brother and sister, rather than husband and wife.

The whole focus is on husband and wife’s nightly activities- sexual activity, breeding, having children, etc etc. All the usual boring nonsense that every other drama focuses on too, except this one in a period drama- same old story dressed up in different clothes.

They should have gotten a different lead actress. Believability is a big part of acting to create the world of the drama for the viewer, and if the actor does a bad job, it just ends up looking cheap and bad.

The interactions and love that develops between Fukami (the good looking apparent Navy playboy) and Fumiko San (the independent single working woman) are a lot more natural, understated, and subtle compared to the main couple. I enjoyed watching their scenes, as they slowly learn about each other while holding reservations. For example the scene where they are sent by the derpy Natsumi to buy some forgotten ingredient, and they encounter a poor boy stealing, and how they both handle the situation teaches them about each other. Their stolen glances, the quiet question of sending another letter- while the exterior of the woman seems cold, there’s actually real chemistry and love that can be felt there. It’s not in your face. That was quite subtle and beautiful. I also really enjoyed their matchmaking scene- how they were communicating through their eyes and the “air” but giving diplomatic responses to appease the crowd. Fukami has this cheeky Shia LaBeouf vibe, and Fumiko is a headstrong woman who still has that girlish side of her. Their chemistry and desire underneath all their nonchalant performance is so strong that I could see him sweeping her off her feet in a heartbeat. It was almost like a chess mind game. That was interesting to watch. Why couldn’t they have done that kind of treatment with the main couple? It could have been something so subtly beautiful and sweet, instead of watching a weird glitching anxiety attack in the form of Natsumi. She just gives me the ick. Her friend Fumiko is so much more refined and beautiful.

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He Who Can’t Marry – State-Sponsored Marriage Propaganda

I’ve never rated a J drama series this low (most of my ratings are 10s). But this series is 80% desperation, fear, and propaganda. The other 20% is Kuwano’s free spirit and how his way of life is actually the highest way to exist in this world- free from desperation and fear around marriage and romance. He’s the only one who lives outside the constraints of his society and is free to love and show real kindness beyond role playing and fake “nice” performances. And perhaps by the end, I have fallen in love with him, as he is a mirror of my own self- the one who exists and thrives outside of the matrix.

Here’s the Agenda: From the first frame of Season 2, the series drops its mask. Before the story even begins, a text overlay appears on screen:

“Japanese society continues to age. According to the Labor Ministry, there is an increase in the lifetime unmarried rates. This means the percentage of people who remain unmarried after 50 is 23.4% for men and 14.1% for women. This is an issue that our entire society must face.”

The moment you see this, the show’s real function becomes clear—it’s not just a quirky romantic comedy. It’s a piece of state-subsidized cultural programming. The subtitles even mention that it’s sponsored by a government ministry, meaning the agenda isn’t subtle: this is a recruitment ad for marriage, disguised as entertainment.

In this show, the man who enjoys solitude is rebranded as “the man who can’t marry.” That’s not a personality descriptor; it’s a cultural diagnosis. The title says it outright: the problem is not the institution of marriage—it’s you, the individual, for refusing it.

Kuwano-san: The Nail That Sticks Out:
Japan has a proverb: “The nail that sticks out will be hammered down.”
Kuwano is that nail. He’s a middle-aged architect with a quiet, orderly life. He eats alone, travels alone, listens to classical music alone, and thrives in his own company. The plot’s entire throughline is an attempt to hammer him into “normalcy” by shoving him into romance and marriage.

But here’s the propaganda tactic: they don’t present his life neutrally. They paint him as so unlikeable, rude, eccentric—so the audience subconsciously associates singleness with being an abrasive oddball. His character is used as a warning: “If you stay single too long, you’ll turn into this weirdo. Do you want to be like him?”

Weaponizing Insults as Courtship:
Kuwano spends much of the show negging (insulting) the women around him—particularly Hayasaka, the doctor from Season 1, and later Yoshiyama, the lawyer in Season 2. He lobs cutting remarks like:
• “You should have given up your job back then and a better married life could have been waiting for you.”
• “Is this your excuse for not putting in any effort to get married?”

The women get visibly angry, but the script eventually reframes his behavior as “banter” and, disturbingly, “romantic tension.” All the female characters, especially the older ones are shown as desperate, or lonely and desperate, with stars in their eyes for some romantic fantasy. They are driven by fear and threat by society’s imaginary voice: “Don’t die alone and be lonely!” It’s almost comical. And when Kuwano finally professes his “love” to Hayasaka at the end of Season 1, she cries—not because there’s any real intimacy, but because it’s the first time he’s spoken to her without an insult. Relief is mistaken for love. Because everyone is “tired of being lonely,” they’ll fill in that gap with any garbage person they come into contact with.

The Hypocrisy:
Here’s the absurdity: Kuwano himself never lifts a finger to get married. He’s single, content in his own life, yet criticizes women in the same position. It’s pure projection. And the show never has anyone call him out for it—because that would puncture the propaganda bubble.

Failed Models of Marriage:
If marriage is the “holy grail” the series claims, where are the success stories? Not in Kuwano’s orbit.
• His brother-in-law openly talks about wanting a mistress, lavishes expensive gifts on a hostess, and seems miserable at home.
• Other married characters show varying degrees of dissatisfaction, boredom, or covert longing for escape.

These examples quietly reveal the truth: the machine isn’t delivering what it promises. Yet the script ignores its own evidence, pushing forward the idea that singleness is the problem to be solved.

One Season 2 dating subplot is especially telling. Kuwano is coaxed into using a dating app. He receives a message from a yoga instructor:

“I’ve led a fulfilling life by myself until now. I’d do barbecue by myself, karaoke by myself, go to Hawaii by myself. I intended to enjoy life alone, but before I knew it I was about 40, and suddenly felt perhaps I was deceiving myself the whole time…”

The first half mirrors the life of a content single person, creating identification for viewers like me. Then the twist: self-doubt. The message pivots to loneliness, the absence of “human touch,” and an invitation to partner yoga. It’s bait—hooking the solitary viewer with relatable independence, then undermining it with the suggestion that your life has been a lie.

Kuwano’s peace—the quiet of his home, the control over his space—is portrayed as a flaw to be “fixed.” The show treats self-possession as a problem rather than a strength, because the propaganda machine cannot allow the sovereign individual to stand as proof that happiness is possible outside the marriage script.

The women chasing Kuwano—Hayasaka, Yoshiyama, others—are not driven by love. They’re driven by fear: fear of aging alone, fear of social judgment, fear of facing themselves without the buffer of a role to play. Marriage here is a life raft in rough seas. Kuwano, the “stubborn bachelor,” is the trophy they want to prove the raft works.

But what the series never addresses is the glaring question:
Where are the results? In reality—and in the show’s own secondary storylines—marriage doesn’t bring sustained happiness or joy. Characters are dealing with divorce, affairs, annoying children, in laws, extended family conflict, all sorts of nonsense. Marriage often breeds discontent, betrayal, and regret. The divorced one is liberated and feels free after being in this prison for a while. Yet the propaganda machine keeps associating marriage with the word “happiness” as if repeating it can make it true.

A scene where Kuwano is having dinner with his family, shows him a little upset, and the family says “share your troubles so we can heal as a family!” Then his niece says “usually troubles are either financial or about personal relationships,” and then Kuwano’s brother in law says “well he has no financial difficulties,” and his sister says “and he has no relationships!” And they all start laughing, and Kuwano says “How is this healing?” This sums it up in a nutshell. Kuwano is the scapegoat of his family and also of society. The society dumps all of its shame onto him.

But I find Kuwano himself to be quite a genuine and compassionate person. His stance against marriage as an outdated institution, paired with the fact that he’s not against love itself, is actually the most dangerous thing to the narrative, because it means he hasn’t abandoned connection, just the contractual cage the system calls connection.

And his good heart is there, in small moments the others overlook: how he shows up in his own way when someone actually needs help, how he’s loyal to the few he respects, how he lets his quirks speak louder than social scripts. The others don’t understand him because to understand him would require them to admit that maybe they’ve been chasing the wrong thing their whole lives.

The dog Ken doesn’t see Kuwano as “weird” or “difficult”; it responds to him without the filter of social role-play. Animals can’t be gaslit by the system’s definitions, and the bond there shows that Kuwano is actually clear, present, and safe to be around when you’re not locked into a script. His advice to his neighbor about loosening the pug’s leash so it can breathe is the perfect metaphor for how he sees people too - stop tightening the restraints, stop choking the life out of yourself, breathe. The neighbor can’t even register the wisdom because she’s busy living in the “nice neighbor” role, not reality.

The coffee shop incident in episode 7 shows his pure quiet integrity. He acts decisively against corruption by his client, protects the coffee shop manager’s dream, and never broadcasts it to get credit
because it’s not about polishing an image. That is the opposite of the society around him, where every “good deed” is part of a résumé for public approval. He restores her future without needing her gratitude or anyone else’s acknowledgment. That’s why the gossip continues- if they recognized his actual worth, they’d have to face how shallow their own lives are.

He even sent her a rebranding gift, the coffee shop sign “Purete” without ceremony, which is another tell. He’s not “against connection”; he simply connects in ways that are stripped of transaction and social performance. The divorced coffee shop manager sees the truth in him because she’s been through her own disillusionment and recognizes a real act when she sees one.

So the gossip isn’t really about “how weird” he is. It’s about covering their own envy. He’s living outside the leash they’ve agreed to wear, and every snide remark is an attempt to pull him back into it. They can’t stand that his freedom is real, so they pathologize it until it sounds like something no one would want. The dog is the one unfiltered witness in the whole series.

While the neighbors are doing the constant polite-smiling, gossip-behind-the-back loop, the dog’s behavior cuts straight through that performance. It isn’t looking at Kuwano out of politeness, obligation, or social currency. It leans under the balcony, risking its own comfort just to catch sight of him, because it recognizes something real there, presence without pretense. Kuwano is “the fool on the hill”- a wise man who is sorely misunderstood by the fools around him.

The dog’s longing look at him is a kind of silent verdict: this is the person I’d rather be with. No human in his circle dares say that out loud because it would expose their own hypocrisy. But the dog doesn’t need to navigate the system’s etiquette; it goes where it feels safe, seen, and understood.

And that’s what makes those moments so telling. The “nice” humans are scripted to ostracize him, yet the only unscripted being in the show gravitates to him over and over. It’s a small but constant leak in the propaganda, a reminder that instinct, not social opinion, is the truer measure of someone’s worth.

I’m still watching Season 2 (currently on Episode 8) and will update this review when I finish. But so far, The Man Who Can’t Marry reads less like a rom-com and more like a government memo disguised as a sitcom. It’s a glossy ad for a product with a 100% defect rate designed to shame the content single into “joining society” no matter the cost to personal well-being.

With all that said, I do love Kuwano san- he is my role model! He’s like a cowboy that lives the kind of life I live and I just adore him. He’s actually a lot nicer in season 2 and says many polite things and smiles and does very kind things for people, and yet the people around him still criticize and mock him- people should let him be- free to be as he is without needing to tie him down into the prison that is marriage. Fly free as a bird Kuwano San! Hiroshi Abe did a great job portraying him. I ended up watching both seasons again and just loved Kuwano san more and more. And so I increased my rating!

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My Favorite Actors switched bodies!

I’ve loved Haruka Ayase and Takahashi Issey in their separate dramas and now I see the two doing a soul swap which I found intriguing.

Mochizuki’s soul is trapped inside Hidaka’s body, and Takahashi does an amazing job basically acting as a woman, but not a stereotypical ditsy valley girl- a highly intelligent detective, but with an authenticity, innocence, and vulnerability about her- he captures it beautifully. She is struggling not only in a man’s body but one that is being investigated for serial murders, along with the identity of being a highly prized and strong leader as CEO of a company- Hidaka’s identity basically acts as Mochizuki’s shadow- shining with qualities that she struggles to embody in her original female body - the lone female body among a sea of male dominated entitled police detective characters. And Mochizuki is Hidaka’s shadow with her sense of justice and innocence and naïveté. After the switch, Takahashi brings out that sweet, innocent vulnerable soul so beautifully trapped within his own body. Seemingly a body that neither of them want..

On the other side, Hidaka’s self confident scheming soul is now in Mochizuki’s female body, and he’s enjoying adorning her body in makeup, jewelry, and nice clothes to play up her attractiveness, manipulating with calculated smiles and coyness playing the game to get what she what she wants out of her colleagues around her.

It’s seems that Hidaka is much more “successful” in Mochizuki’s body harboring the male narcissistic psychopathic archetype in a female body, than the other way around. It makes sense since it is a patriarchal world that basically rewards the Hidaka type of masculine soul regardless of the body, and deems Mochizuki’s feminine soul with her honesty, innocence, sense of justice and ideals as weak and naive. Therefore Mochizuki operating in Hidaka’s body struggles a lot more and wishes for the switch back (to the point where he has to explain it away as memory loss to his company employees), whereas Hidaka as Mochizuki’s body is fine where he is and is not particularly attached to his old body or life- he gets to “thrive” and play his Machiavellian game in any body he wants and get ahead while Mochizuki’s earnest soul struggles. A very interesting exploration of these archetypes.

After living as Hidaka San for a while, Mochizuki has develops empathy for Hidaka and his brother- the brother being the bad guy and all, where Hidaka covers up for him. Even after having several opportunities to arrest him, where her former self would have salivated at the opportunity, she hesitates multiple times and her sense of justice traverses a grey area. It shows that even in murder, when one walks in the shoes of another only then they can possibly understand what another goes through. When they switch back to their own bodies in the 8th or 9th episode, there is a new understanding between the two of them, and a new closeness and chemistry shows between them. Hidaka now back in his body feels a strong sense to protect Mochizuki and even tries to sacrifice himself to protect her by giving a false confession to the murders. The last couple of episodes explore the grey area and blurred lines between empathy, compassion, justice, and morality.

Regarding the music, why do they so freely use Beethoven’s Symphony No. 5 as the title music? When it comes on at the beginning during the intro, it just gives Judge Judy vibes. Uh no… What on earth???

The last bit when they meet on the bridge after everything’s over and say their goodbyes, but turn around and Mochizuki asks about his job as the full moon is rising.. I wonder what that’s about…? Cliffhanger?

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Aikawa San delivers profound lessons!

My original rating was a 10.. but from episode 8 onwards, I started to see a trend which dropped my rating temporarily down to an 8.. More on that below..

I came for Takahashi. He delivered. He’s sweet, innocent, with a playful charm when he’s fascinated by all the animals, yet has a kind of confidence in his own world, while getting scared like a little school boy when he gets yelled at. So many flavors in one actor.

A very interesting dialogue: When Aikawa San says the dentist is like the rabbit, the dentist lady tries to compare herself to the turtle because she doesn’t want to be the rabbit that snoozes and loses. In other words, in trying to compare herself to the turtle she’s still trying to win. Then Aikawa San says something very interesting: “Was the turtle hard-working? That story can be interpreted anyway you like… it (the turtle) didn’t work hard at all. It did not care about winning or losing. It just enjoys whatever’s in front of him. Imagine this the world from the turtles point of view. It’s just walking and crawling on the ground. The world is only a few centimeters above the ground. The turtle only goes forward so that he can enjoy the amazing world. Rabbit don’t even exist in the turtle’s world. That’s why the turtle didn’t shout to the sleeping rabbit.” In other words, the turtle wasn’t even in the race, and yet it seemed to win it! Wow wow what a perspective, I love that so much. All this time we are taught that the turtle and the rabbit were competing evenly against each other and the turtle took advantage of the rabbit’s nap time and won the race. But the turtle wasn’t even running that race, only the rabbit was competing against the turtle.

Then the dentist lady asks, “Then what about the rabbit? How do you interpret the rabbit? It had talent but wasted it and lost. Am I wrong?”

He says “ the rabbit runs to look down on the turtle. It wanted to prove how great it is.”

This dialogue was everything. Wow just wow!!! May I live the turtle life forever and only for us on what’s in front of me and not look at or compete with rabbits!

Now why does Aikawa San say “Eeee!” Before sleeping? Is it like “Aummmm” the primordial sound of the universe? I thought I would never figure it out but.. the grandpa taught him it’s to forget about the bad memories and wake up feeling better- the grandpa forgot but he still does it. Shows his childlike innocence. Such a person is not appreciated too much in this world.

Another gem of a quote from Aikawa San: “I rarely get along with other people. But I get along with the person I wanted to the most. That’s more than enough. Long time ago, I used to load that person. I tried really hard not to get along with him but failed. I couldn’t stand it and cried every day. Our relationship is fine now. It’s me.”

Another gem of a quote: “When you focus too much on the task in front of you, your wishes will come true before you realize it.”

So.. why did my rating temporarily drop from a 10 to an 8? The first several episodes that showed Aikawa San’s unique perspective and experience of living fully in the moment, which showed a level of acceptance, that he was different from the crowd, and that he couldn’t be pushed and molded into a box. But from episode 8 onwards, there is a strong trend in the story going towards marriage, and the pressure and obsession for Aikawa San to marry is strong, with his annoying housekeeper/mother always sticking her nose into it. Basically he needs a maid for life, and that’s why she starts teaching the dentist lady and pestering her to get with him, and basically forcing romantic feelings onto them that just don’t seem to be there. The two have zero chemistry and are forced and pressured to fabricate feelings for each other out of nothing. The relationship seems strictly like acquaintances with vague reservations and awkwardness with each other, but there’s nothing in it that indicates romance. But for the director to push this romance angle so hard in the last 3 episodes is so forced and starts sounding like “The Man Who Cannot Marry”- where the agenda is to show that “Even if society said he’s weird and an outcast, Look! He can get married and start breeding too so we can keep society going! What started off as a lighthearted show about accepting this man who is different and doesn’t fit the mold, starts to push him into that same mold. There’s a scene in episode 9 where Aikawa San has been pressured so much by his mother housekeeper Yamada San to “Think about his feelings for the dentist so they can start planning their wedding!” That he tells the dentist what he thinks and the best he can come up with is “You’re interesting,” while the dentist who is destroyer for someone, anyone to love her is holding her breath hoping he says the right lines to make her happy and “complete her.” She ends up confused and disappointed with “you’re interesting..” because the romance script is demanding and tries to force feelings that just aren’t there. In the end is it all just about romance and marriage and breeding before the mother dies? The same old nonsense societal mass programming? Is this what the show what building up to since the beginning? Marriage, family, breeding? As an audience, I feel cheated.

But then there was a scene where Aikawa sensei gets told off by his uptight competitive colleague, and there are tears in his eyes. You can feel it. OMG Takahashi is so precious! I almost added a star just for that one scene. Aikawa San is so pure and genuine as a character- just keep him the way he is and stop trying to push marriage onto him! He says that when he made his light larger, unpleasant things got inside too, and caused him pain. And his grandpa says “That’s a good thing…” So Aikawa San reflects on this and decided that from now on, his light should continue to spread.

A wise thing as Aikawa San prepares to go to space, he said these wise things: “I solved the mystery. You asked me I met a lot of people, and the dentist, and Koichi, so the light within me grew larger. When I don’t try to erase all the terrible and painful things, but wrap them all with light, my own light becomes infinite. That means, even outer space will fit inside my light. That’s why I’m going to space. You invited me here for a purpose, right?”

Since by the end there was no forced romance, contrived wedding scenes, or family breeding agendas, I reverted my rating back to a 10. Aikawa sensei went to outer space and continues to spread his light. That’s more like it.

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Glorifies Objectification, Violence, and Mistreatment of Women

Episode 1:
There are many problematic things about this show. A mess of a family with 4 kids, mother recently passed away, a dad who can barely function, where the oldest sister who tries being the surrogate mom and does her best to take care of everything. Then comes Mita the housekeeper from nowhere. She is an amazing housekeeper and is somehow emotionless through all the BS this family puts her through. She cleans the house to perfection and cooks amazing meals, but when the older sister told her to burn all of their late mother’s memorabilia, the older brother got angry and started punching Mita, a grown woman. A few minutes later, the family changes their mood and settles down to a happy birthday together and demanding things of her - while no one apologized to her for that physical abuse- that oldest son treated her like a punching bag that he could just beat up whenever he wanted, and when their mood was happy again in a few minutes, they ask her to do everything like a genie- cook for us, get birthday candles, a card, the cake- but they beat her up right before that. A a stunning condoning of the abuse and objectification of women. A wife is seen as nothing but a glorified housekeeper, so much so that a professional housekeeper like Mita is abused like a punching bag and then taken advantage of while she has a bloodied lip from being punched by a man! And yet she is emotionless and continues doing all their chores. What a horrible message this show sends- that women are worthless and can be treated in such a way. At the end of the first episode, the husband reveals that the mother committed suicide. As a psychological study, I can almost guarantee that the way this family treats Mita is the same way they treated the late mother/wife. Simply exploited, taken for granted, and used up for getting things done for their selfish needs, and then thrown away like a dirty dish rag. Only after the mother died, the family keeps talking about her because they can’t function without her. But while she was alive, the husband was having an affair, and Kii the annoying little girl told her mother that she should die just for asking her eat tomatoes.

Episode 2:
Despite all that Mita did for them - cooks, cleans, etc, all the family can do is complain about her behind her back saying “isn’t she strange? She never smiles etc.” while eating the breakfast she prepared. A thankless, entitled family. It’s revealed that the dad/husband was having an affair- despite all that the mother would have done for the 4 kids and as a wife, submissive housekeeper, cook, bangmaid, etc, dude had an office affair and had handed his late wife divorce papers, driving her to suicide. Even after her death, he continues to hit on the office mistress. Urara, the late mother’s younger sister is portrayed as an incompetent single bimbo, the woman at the office is a mistress, the wife/mother is invisible and driven to suicide, and Mita is seen as genie/robot/punching bag. The director seems to be seriously misogynistic and views women as 2d cartoon characters. Then the father decides to fire her for his own selfish motives. Mita says a wise thing: “humans are weak creatures. If they see someone weak the will bully then, and if they see someone strong, they run.” Then the younger son who asked Mita to beat up a bully, then tells her to “take responsibility for what she’s done,” instead of taking responsibility for what he asked her to do, and then tells her to do something even worse, to kill the bully. Then the late mother’s dad decides everything is Mita’s fault and said “Why do you keep such a woman as your housekeeper? Fire her immediately!” After all she’s done. Ah what a tired bunch of chauvinists. Last scene of episode 2, the dad asks Mita to burn the revealing letter from his late wife that says “if you leave me I will kill myself” because he’s a coward and doesn’t want his kids to know the truth. Mita deserves better.

Episode 3:
Yui the oldest daughter finds out about the dad’s affair and how he was the cause of their mother’s suicide and death. When she confronts him about it, the dad actually tries to slap her because women are only meant to be hit according to the director. Then as the father is found out by the kids and they leave the house, he explains to Mita, “I never wanted to get married, but their mother got pregnant with Yui..” as if it has nothing to do with him. For some reason Urara acts like she couldn’t care less about her sister’s death, even after her brother-in-law tells her the truth- she just acts like a giddy schoolgirl with a crush. How inhuman. The family projects their own failings onto Mita, including the dad saying she doesn’t have a heart when he is the one who screwed up his family. Even after the kids leave and the truth is in the open, the dad guy tries to hit on the affair lady at the office because he needs an escape. Women especially Mita are treated as sacrificial objects to use and drain for selfish purposes.

Episode 5-6:
The older brother treats Mita like a blowup doll by asking her to have sex with him. Then he asked her to destroy the neighbor’s house. Then the oldest daughter Yui decides she wants to die because her high school fling is a player, and tells Mita to kill her. When Mita obliges, she acts like she’s so shocked and as if she is a victim of Mita. This ridiculous family can’t even take responsibility for their actions when they give Mita explicit orders- Yui tells Mita to kill her and not to stop even if she says “stop”.. Just so she can blame her? Then she acts as if Mita is evil and it’s a horror movie with Yui trying to get away from her, when she’s the one who gave the orders. Nonsense! Then Yui points the knife at Mita trying to kill her. What do Mita ever do that this selfish, sinful family tries to exploit her in every way possible and then kill her? Poor Mita.

Episode 7:
Mita makes adress for Kii, the youngest kid. When she’s done the kid grabs it and says “Sugoi!” No one ever thanks Mita for her work or apologizes for their vile behavior towards her. Then Kii invites her dad to her school play where she’s playing Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz.. and the dad’s like “I don’t know, I’ve never been to any of the kids’ school events… but how do I prove to the kids that I love them? Is saying the words I love you enough?” I don’t know genius, maybe show it through action by attending the school play and spending time with them? Then the dad gets in a fight with a coworker and starts punching him for dumping his ex-mistress and then gets himself fired. Then he goes to Mita and asks her, “You can do anything right? Can you put me back in my company? Can you rewind time?” Do they really think she’s a genie that came out of a lamp? Then in typical selfish dad fashion, he asked Mita to somehow get the play recital cancelled for his own selfish reasons since he didn’t want to go or face his kids. However there was a touching moment in this episode where the kids out on the Wizard of Oz play in front of their dad at home (because Kii was kicked out of the play at school since their dad tried to get it cancelled by telling Mita and she made a bomb threat to the kindergarten lol), and the dad was so moved by the performance that he starts pouring out his feelings of regret about their mother and how much she loved him and how loving she was and how he wants to love them. Well he never said he loved her back but he is filled with regret and apologizes to his kids to let him back into the family. Then he goes up to his ex-mistress to say I still love you, please married me and and take over as my wife/bang-maid but you must take care of my 4 kids! Ha what a sly man. She leaves.

Episode 8:
Nagiko’s dad is in the hospital because he got punched telling off some kids. He sees Mita (who is ordered by Yui to impersonate her late mother and talk to him and persuade him to forgive the dad). When he sees Mita’s face, without hesitation the grown old man punches Mita in the face. Even after getting punched, Mita calmly explains to him that he’s living in fear and can’t express his thoughts properly and that’s why he resorts to violence (just like the director). Then he yells at her “Shut up! What could a housekeeper know?” He’s basically a caveman looking for an outlet for violence. But somehow the show tries to convince the audience that his violence is an expression of his love. Weeks later he manages to croak out an apology to Mita- Because Mita is still like a clear, calm lake, everyone projects all sorts of nonsense onto her. First the oldest son Kakeru punches her in the fist episode, then asks her to strip and “do it” with him, then he convinces the other kids that she is a reincarnation of their late mother. They all believe it. And Mita’s like “I’m not your mother.” And they’re all so nosy about her personal life that it gets annoying. Like leave her alone. One day the family invites her to sit down and eat with them and gives her this moon cake thing to eat. She had refused it in the past but this time she takes it and eats a bite. One bite of the moon cake has the effect of 10 alcoholic drinks because Mita spills her life story. Dad died, mom and step brother are narcissists, husband and son died in a fire at the hands of the brother and she was convinced by her mother that her smile made people unhappy- how upside down and weird. It’s interesting because this same actress plays Sakurako in Yamato Nadeshiko, a “perfect woman” flight attendant character who always wears a plastic smile on her face.

Episode 9
Mita quits after tell her story, and Urara shows up everyday to take her place. Again the director shows his misogyny by Urara’s extreme characterization as a single woman who is a disaster of a human being. She basically can’t do anything right and everything she touches turns into a disaster. While it might seem like harmless fun or comedy, mocking or attacking a single woman as basically good for nothing is not cute. She inserts herself into their house to help with cooking and ruins their kitchen with her incompetence, and leaves without cleaning up. Then Mita starts working for the next door neighbor who is a petty, evil woman with a husband and son. When she finds out about the affair she orders Mita to kill her husband, herself, and her son on her son’s birthday. Then she blames it on Mita, calls her crazy and dangerous, and tells Mita to kill herself. Poor Mita who is barely hanging on by a thread starts pouring gasoline on herself. The cowardly family runs away after ordering Mita to kill them and then turning it on herself. Then the kids from next door burst through the door somehow and hold the lit candle that Mita is about to light on her gaslit self. They’re all holding the candle and fighting but none of the kids have the sense to just blow it out. Instead Kakeru, Yui, and Mita are all holding this candle light fighting over it and someone could just blow it out and the fight would be over. But brains are not part of this scene. Then the other two kids come and hold the candle too, and Kii the little girl tries to be cute and sings a song at the most inappropriate time. It’s not cute but annoying. Then the family calls the police on Mita and tries to get her arrested. Then the dad from the original family says “I’m angry at you Mita you put my kids in danger! If you’re sorry then take responsibility and work for our family!” Uh what? Those kids barged into the neighbors’ house on their own and put themselves in danger and refuse to take responsibility for themselves and instead the dad pushed the blame and responsibility all onto Mita and orders her to be a slave for their family as if she owes them something since they cannot function without her housekeeping. What selfish people. So anyway Mita comes back to the original family and it confirms my suspicions about the mother/wife role in the family- Mita has essentially filled the late mother’s role in the family by cooking, cleaning, taking care of the kids’ needs and errands, but remains emotionally detached. It tells me that a mother/wife is nothing but a glorified bangmaid. And since Mita has lost her husband and son, she has convinced herself that she must never smile and become a robot housekeeper obeying the ridiculous orders of others but never having a will of her own- again a very chauvinistic misogynistic view of women. Then Urara randomly admits that she likes her brother in law- she never once showed sadness over her sister’s death nor anger over the fact that the husband had an affair that led to her sister’s suicide. Instead she only selfishly cares about her little crush on her brother in law.

Episode 10:
The family starts putting motherly demands on Mita- Yui the oldest girl asks Mita to teach her how to cook, Kakeru the oldest son gets sick and needs her to be a nurse, the next brother needs help with his homework, and Kii needs Mita to clean her ears. They all make demands of Mita, making it a “work order” so she has no choice or will of her own. They take advantage of her to tend to their needs but it’s disturbing that Mita has no will or needs or desires of her own. It’s as if to say, if you’re a woman and you don’t have a husband or kid (or lost them) then you’re basically as good as dead. Mita doesn’t smile and walks around like the walking dead. This is the fate of any woman that doesn’t have her identity defined through motherhood and being a wife. The dad tells Mita how he wants to start living for the present and the future and not get stuck in the past. The third kid gives a nice speech about how he should have appreciated his mother mother and thanked her. In a sense the lesson is even if one isn’t there or you didn’t get affection from someone, you can always pass it on to someone else who needs it. Then Kii asks to help Mita in the kitchen and in her usual annoying fashion she knocks over a burning pot and ruins all the food and gets herself burned and Mita has to deal with that along with the ruined food. It’s a thankless job that only a sacrificial lamb with a death wish would take. Then the crazy lady next door says that her husband who cheated on her kicked her out because she had ordered Mita to burn down their house, and tries to frame it as “it was just a joke and you always make people unhappy! Go away!” Must be the same voice of Mita’s narcissistic mother. Then Urara comes out and tells her brother in law that’s she’s in love with him. Does it get any weirder than this? Yes! Meanwhile the 4 kids ask Mita to be their mother and Kii finds a stone to represent Mita to put in her family stone box. So basically good housekeeper can be “upgraded” to a mother because essentially that’s what a mother is right? A glorified housekeeper/bangmaid.

The music? Mita’s “theme” is creepy horror music as if she’s some character from the Adam’s Family. She’s just a women who’s and mourning the loss of her family- but she’s framed as a scary or dangerous.

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