A deep, heavy sense of sorrow.
That was the feeling I was left with after finishing Mood Indigo.
It is a story overflowing with emotion—full of pain, bitterness, and heartbreak, yet also filled with a fierce and overwhelming kind of love.
When I watched it for the first time, I simply thought that Kido was selfish, cowardly, and cruel for abandoning Kijima. Not only did he run away and refuse to take responsibility for the mess he had created, but he also left Kijima with a deep psychological scar that haunted him for years, making it incredibly difficult for him to open his heart and love someone again.
However, after completing the entire franchise and returning to Mood Indigo with a more open perspective, I found myself genuinely sympathizing with Kido. In some moments, I even unconsciously put myself in his shoes. And as crazy as it is to admit, if I were Kido, I probably would have acted the same way. I could understand his anxiety, his inner turmoil, and ultimately the choices he made.
The same goes for Kijima. Putting myself in his place helped me fully understand the profound obsession Kido left behind and the lasting impact it had on him even years later. Kijima truly opened his heart to Kido. He revealed his authentic self to him and genuinely looked forward to a future where Kido would be by his side. Yet because Kido lacked the courage to face his feelings, he left Kijima alone with overwhelming loneliness and a deep sense of self-doubt. Because of Kido, Kijima came to believe that he was unworthy of being loved!
Damn it—I still want to punch Kido for that!
They loved each other. They understood each other. But they met at a time when neither of them was mature enough to truly live for the other person.
What further elevates this already remarkable story is its music. The soundtrack drew me completely into the film’s dreamlike and deeply melancholic world, a world so haunting that it often left me breathless. The moment the very first note rang out, tears would begin to well up in my eyes. Honestly, I felt like a leaking faucet throughout the entire movie.
The cinematography reinforces that same sense of sorrow. Its palette of subdued amber intertwined with melancholy blues creates the image of a lonely flame flickering in the darkness. To me, that flame feels like the one that has been quietly burning inside Kido all along.
I cried no fewer than ten times while watching their story unfold.
The ending of Kido and Kijima's relationship makes complete sense. It is filled with bitterness and regret, but they truly should not have stayed together any longer. They shared a beautiful chapter of youth—a time full of passion, intensity, and dreams. Even though they did not end up together, each remains an important part of the other's memories.
Wherever life may take them from here, I hope they continue moving forward, live well, and remain at peace with the choices they have made.
It is a story overflowing with emotion—full of pain, bitterness, and heartbreak, yet also filled with a fierce and overwhelming kind of love.
When I watched it for the first time, I simply thought that Kido was selfish, cowardly, and cruel for abandoning Kijima. Not only did he run away and refuse to take responsibility for the mess he had created, but he also left Kijima with a deep psychological scar that haunted him for years, making it incredibly difficult for him to open his heart and love someone again.
However, after completing the entire franchise and returning to Mood Indigo with a more open perspective, I found myself genuinely sympathizing with Kido. In some moments, I even unconsciously put myself in his shoes. And as crazy as it is to admit, if I were Kido, I probably would have acted the same way. I could understand his anxiety, his inner turmoil, and ultimately the choices he made.
The same goes for Kijima. Putting myself in his place helped me fully understand the profound obsession Kido left behind and the lasting impact it had on him even years later. Kijima truly opened his heart to Kido. He revealed his authentic self to him and genuinely looked forward to a future where Kido would be by his side. Yet because Kido lacked the courage to face his feelings, he left Kijima alone with overwhelming loneliness and a deep sense of self-doubt. Because of Kido, Kijima came to believe that he was unworthy of being loved!
Damn it—I still want to punch Kido for that!
They loved each other. They understood each other. But they met at a time when neither of them was mature enough to truly live for the other person.
What further elevates this already remarkable story is its music. The soundtrack drew me completely into the film’s dreamlike and deeply melancholic world, a world so haunting that it often left me breathless. The moment the very first note rang out, tears would begin to well up in my eyes. Honestly, I felt like a leaking faucet throughout the entire movie.
The cinematography reinforces that same sense of sorrow. Its palette of subdued amber intertwined with melancholy blues creates the image of a lonely flame flickering in the darkness. To me, that flame feels like the one that has been quietly burning inside Kido all along.
I cried no fewer than ten times while watching their story unfold.
The ending of Kido and Kijima's relationship makes complete sense. It is filled with bitterness and regret, but they truly should not have stayed together any longer. They shared a beautiful chapter of youth—a time full of passion, intensity, and dreams. Even though they did not end up together, each remains an important part of the other's memories.
Wherever life may take them from here, I hope they continue moving forward, live well, and remain at peace with the choices they have made.
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