People are saying this show is "no plot", or "all fluff, no substance", but I'm loving all of the little details…
The names, for one – I've seen around that Gu-Won meabs something close to "salvation", and Sa-Rang means "love"; she notes how he's always there for her in crisis – his love comes to her in forms of salvation; loving her is his form of salvation. Gu Won's mother's name is Mi-So, which means "smile", which I feel like adds another dimension to the motif of smiling already established.
Also, I've seen one person point out the connection Sarang talking about how the large windmills looked like pinwheels as a kid, that could take her to her mother – then her being captivated by the pinwheel while her and Gu-Won were drunk in episode 3.
The themes of relationships in contrast to each other:
-Pyeong-Hwa, who continued to suffer in her professional and personal life at the hands of her ex because of the divorce, who has found a kind and respectful man who's interested in her in Ro-Woon.
-Da-Eul, who should divorce from her toxic, unsupportive husband and the in-laws that treat her as her slave – but is likely held back by her child, and her own professional situation.
-Hwa-Ran, who is trying to avoid divorce to save her professional life being tarnished.
-Gu-Won and Sarang's budding relationship, which has been steadily built up as a relationship predicated on mutual respect and understanding, which is now being put to conflict by the prospect of him being expected to marry into his social class.
Considering the established stakes in the social and professional ramifications for marriage and divorce (both in need of being taken seriously), and his still fledgeling efforts at winning his father over to let him be primary heir, and at being taken seriously – and considering the personal cost of marrying somebody else (both to him, Sa-Rang – and to us!), I think it's going to be interesting to watch this play out.
People are saying this show is "no plot", or "all fluff, no substance", but I'm loving all of the little details that are put into perspective as we go on, and the small details that are adding up – as well as the general pro-worker sentiment – and the themes of respect and care being the foundation of healthy relationships, and of marriage. More details in spoilers below:
Can someone please explain to me why being divorced is stigmatised in Korea to the extent that you can't progress…
I'm not Korean, so I'll provide some quotes & references from some other sources to answer.
"In traditional Confucian philosophy, marriage was seen as a union between families rather than individuals, and divorce was rare and heavily stigmatized as a failure of duty and obligation. Today, many Koreans still view marriage as an important part of their identity and social status, and believe that divorce reflects poorly on both parties."
"Women have it particularly hard — seen as failing not only their partners and children, but also their extended families and reputations. The impenetrable patriarchy hurls most blame on the wife as their domain is the home.
I know of many Asian-Australian women who are emotionally and mentally detached from their husbands but choose not to separate as there is a misguided 'safety net' that comes with having a nuclear family — financial stability, sense of normalcy and not being branded a pariah."
I've written more about this in my full review, but I felt really, really disappointed in this drama; I loved the premise of it to begin with, but as it went on – I feel like it lost momentum, and made a lot of changes from the source material that didn't add anything, and in fact made it unnecessarily muddled in its attempt to be more complex than the Webtoon.
The best parts were (to me) when it gave a lot of depth and meaning to the supporting cast – that bit of added nuance was well-done. The acting too, for the most part, was phenomenal – and I loved the OST. So many stand-out components, but the whole thing just fell apart to me by the end.
too much information for those who haven’t watched yet. Please mark as a spoiler. If I hadn’t seen this yet,…
Genuinely asking – what have I said about the ending in what I wrote, and what details would you omit for a non-watcher? There's nothing I can think of reading back that significantly betrays the storyline or the ending (only my emotional reaction, and some general nuances/interpretations I'd picked up that I think are nonspecific enough to the broader plot that I wouldn't consider them spoilers) – but if there's anything that you spotted and I didn't then I will tag it as a spoiler!
Lee Jin Wook was accused of sexual assault in 2016. But because "lack of consent" in South Korea is "proven" by the rapist using violence and/or intimidation or the victim already being incapacitated. Resistance must be registered "impossible or incredibly difficult", she gave in proof of bruising on her ankle, knee, shoulder, cervical vertebrae, and lower back, but he was cleared of all charges.
The full bench stated, “There is room for suspicion that the two people had consensual sex. However, A not wanting sexual relations is consistent with her testimony and there is probability that sexual relations took place against A’s will.” They continued, “Based on Lee Jin Wook’s testimony, there was no asking of consent for sexual relations nor was consent given by A. In light of this, the indictment and crime cannot be proven.”
He then counter-sued his accuser for making a false accusation. In 2017, his accuser was found not guilty of making a false accusation, but Lee Jin Wook's side appealed the verdict – and she was sentenced to a minimum of eight months in prison for defamation in February 2018.
The court stated: “As Oh has common sense, she likely knew the difference between sexual relations that one secretly does not want to engage in and rape that occurs with oppressive tactics. Therefore, Oh’s accusation against Lee is a false accusation that goes against objective truth.”
As an autistic person, I love this drama to bits. Even the hardships, the bullying, and the misunderstandings (all of which I have experienced myself, to a lesser degree), and the board of directors asking if his autism is "cured" (which may be a mistranslation, or may just be showing the ignorance of the board members—especially considering Si-On is never "cured", and that they address him "getting better" later on as him NOT getting better, but being more comfortable and more familiar with his environment, which I find very accurate to my experience). It's flawed, for sure, and quite dated now in some respects, but I think it will forever be one of my favourites.♡
I'm getting the impression it was a bit of a polarising drama from the comments and reviews left here (and I was halfway expecting it, due to the lack of adherence to the source material, and because some of the story threads ended up perhaps not tied up in a way some would have preferred), but I'm genuinely shocked to see how many people vehemently hated it? It might not rank among my utmost favourites, but I found it dark, twisty, and I loved getting my mind bent out of shape by every turn the plot took.
The cinematography, the writing, the acting, and the set/costume design were all incredibly impressive to me (except some of the dissatisfying ways the drama wrapped up—that still didn't feel necessarily so disappointing to me; some elements felt very, very satisfying and cathartic), and I found it a worthwhile watch, that would rank among some of the better dramas I've seen, still considering myself a pretty picky watcher.
If somebody's coming here to see whether they should watch it, I'd say give it a shot! I enjoyed the journey it took me on.
I couldn't disagree more with people saying that Lee Byung Hun was a miscast, and I don't believe the age gap (between actors or characters) made a significant dent at all on how poignant and heartbreaking of a love story theirs was; especially considering how well they tugged at the emotional heartstrings even with the strong lack of physical intimacy. Kim Tae-Ri was already made one of my favourite actresses from The Handmaiden, and nothing's changed since.
The way that they took the time for each other; learnt languages for each other, and said "See you." instead of "Goodbye."—the sacrifices they made for each other and the way their love visibly lit them up from the inside. It made me laugh a lot, but I sat there and bawled after I had finished, and several weeks in I'm still tearing up thinking about it.
I really loved how the foundation of their relationship was a respect, near reverence, and have found the interpretations of Ae-Shin symbolically representing the spirit of Korea interesting. I still have a lot to think about, and a lot more to learn about Korean (and more broadly, colonial) history, and though this may not be a nonfiction piece, the pain in that history is still very much real. Stories like this make me start thinking about how to keep the flame alive.
I finished watching this on New Year's Day, and it felt like the perfect way to close off on 2022. A lot of my favorite dramas are the more melancholic slowburn slices of life with thriller subplots (for example; My Mister, or One Spring Night, which both had significant stalking and abuse subplots in them, while still being healing and at a slower pace), and in general the merging and fluidity of genre is something that really draws me in about Kdramas.
I really, really loved the feeling this drama created in me—and I loved the ending so much. I really grew to love the characters (especially the two leading characters), and the setting beside the sea. It left me feeling very satisfied, and at peace with the world, and myself.♡
I followed on from Alchemy Of Souls and My Liberation Notes (both of which I have loved), and at the bequest/recommendation of somebody I know to watch this, and for the most part—I was impressed.
I think one of the largest strengths of this drama to me is how genuinely poetic it was; it had a lot of good and meaningful line-by-line writing, metaphors, subtext, and references to outside poetry. Another big strength was theme; within the scope of a fake marriage trope,
Expanding more on that—I found this drama had an interesting and refreshing take on the institution of marriage, unconventionality and compatibility. I was impressed by the way it had an exploration of feminism, patriarchy and women's issues as they exist in modern society and going back some generations, in workplace harassment, in following your heart's desires as a woman (as far as dreams, ambitions and love go), and a woman's role in marriage and in society as a married or unmarried woman.
I found the characters and, especially the friendships, very interesting—and I found myself caring about those a lot, and there was a secondary couple I loved (bra couple). Unfortunately, especially towards the end, I found myself not really caring about much of the other romance plots—and I think it's because I found a lack of compelling chemistry between them (especially between the main couple). Even if I liked elements of each character in theory, as a romance—I feel like it's a genre where (especially when the third act breakup/separation hits) I NEED to ultimately care about whether most of the couples ends up together or not by the end... and in this respect, I felt like this drama let me down.
Otherwise, I liked the more mellow element of it—and I like how it kept that feeling throughout, while never feeling too slow-paced to me. There were some scenes that were so well acted and well written, I felt winded. It was a good drama for me—it just fell short to me of being great, or exceptionally memorable.
when it come to portraying the autism spectrum, it's very important for me that it's done right. i don't want…
I'm autistic, and I was hesitant getting into this drama for the a similar reason, but (though I don't speak for every autistic person), I'm really really loving it.
Though it's maybe not a "perfect" representation for me and my own experiences (I've never found one), and it took me an episode or two to get into, I feel like it's a very sensitive, compassionate depiction so far—and without going into details, I think the FL is a very well-rounded character.
I really really love this drama. Even if the characters don't make a lot of sense or start off as unlikable, they unfold in ways that are really beautiful. I was practically screaming at the television for the FL to get a grip, and come to her senses and realise her situation – but as it went on, it became clearer and clearer to me how suffocated and exhausted she was, long before the story even began. It takes time to get yourself out of that kind of situation – and we got to see her process of waking up.
There are several strong themes at play in the core of this – that in a world where women's wants, needs and boundaries are disrespected because of what they can be perceived to give and sacrifice to men; that they can live for themselves, and can begin again – can find healthier lives and build better relationships for themselves. It's not just a drama for women, but for men too – in a society where the ML is constantly looked down upon for his life circumstances, he finds strength, empowerment and fulfilment in his new relationship as much as she does.
I think this has easily snuck it's way into being one of my favourites. In my opinion, it's a masterpiece of writing, direction and acting. It spoke a lot to me, and is definitely a story that will live with me for a long time.
I really think this was a modern masterpiece... Park Hae-Young strikes again with the heartfelt, sombre and healing slice-of-life dramas of characters making better lives for themselves—but it wasn't just her; the direction, the acting, the lighting, the set design—everything added so perfectly to make something that meant so much to me. A big thank you to everybody who was a part of this.♡
I'm very much the type of watcher who appreciates what something can give me in terms of revelation, or perspective. Everybody thinks differently, and it's always interesting to me to watch a story and new sets of ideas and ways of living unfold in me. Stories sit with me for a long time, and as that kind of watcher, I thought this was a really, really beautiful drama that spoke a lot to me.
I found the way that the characters progressed in many ways, and were finding new areas they needed to liberate themselves very true to life. You can really imagine a life beyond the screen for them; seeing life less in the preliminary lifestyle of "I will be happy when I get to this destination", or "I will be happy when I move out of this place", and instead building a life that makes way for happiness, and finding ways to take it in as you're living in it.
I think the ending was more symbolic than open—it referred to previous conversations, and states in the characters and previous visual or spoken metaphors (birds, coins, homelessness, liberation, Christianity, determination); I think the more I've sat with it, the more it's come to me.
There are a lot of very interesting people who have engaged and grappled with this drama in many places, and I think those who resonated a lot with it would benefit from trying to find them where they can.
Also, I've seen one person point out the connection Sarang talking about how the large windmills looked like pinwheels as a kid, that could take her to her mother – then her being captivated by the pinwheel while her and Gu-Won were drunk in episode 3.
The themes of relationships in contrast to each other:
-Pyeong-Hwa, who continued to suffer in her professional and personal life at the hands of her ex because of the divorce, who has found a kind and respectful man who's interested in her in Ro-Woon.
-Da-Eul, who should divorce from her toxic, unsupportive husband and the in-laws that treat her as her slave – but is likely held back by her child, and her own professional situation.
-Hwa-Ran, who is trying to avoid divorce to save her professional life being tarnished.
-Gu-Won and Sarang's budding relationship, which has been steadily built up as a relationship predicated on mutual respect and understanding, which is now being put to conflict by the prospect of him being expected to marry into his social class.
Considering the established stakes in the social and professional ramifications for marriage and divorce (both in need of being taken seriously), and his still fledgeling efforts at winning his father over to let him be primary heir, and at being taken seriously – and considering the personal cost of marrying somebody else (both to him, Sa-Rang – and to us!), I think it's going to be interesting to watch this play out.
"In traditional Confucian philosophy, marriage was seen as a union between families rather than individuals, and divorce was rare and heavily stigmatized as a failure of duty and obligation. Today, many Koreans still view marriage as an important part of their identity and social status, and believe that divorce reflects poorly on both parties."
–'Is divorce a stigma in South Korea?': https://www.namhansouthkorea.com/is-divorce-a-stigma-in-south-korea/
"Women have it particularly hard — seen as failing not only their partners and children, but also their extended families and reputations. The impenetrable patriarchy hurls most blame on the wife as their domain is the home.
I know of many Asian-Australian women who are emotionally and mentally detached from their husbands but choose not to separate as there is a misguided 'safety net' that comes with having a nuclear family — financial stability, sense of normalcy and not being branded a pariah."
– ''Divorce is not good in Korean culture': Why mum and I never talked about dad leaving': https://www.abc.net.au/everyday/when-my-dad-left-one-of-the-hardest-things-was-not-talking-about/100543126
The best parts were (to me) when it gave a lot of depth and meaning to the supporting cast – that bit of added nuance was well-done. The acting too, for the most part, was phenomenal – and I loved the OST. So many stand-out components, but the whole thing just fell apart to me by the end.
Lee Jin Wook was accused of sexual assault in 2016. But because "lack of consent" in South Korea is "proven" by the rapist using violence and/or intimidation or the victim already being incapacitated. Resistance must be registered "impossible or incredibly difficult", she gave in proof of bruising on her ankle, knee, shoulder, cervical vertebrae, and lower back, but he was cleared of all charges.
The full bench stated, “There is room for suspicion that the two people had consensual sex. However, A not wanting sexual relations is consistent with her testimony and there is probability that sexual relations took place against A’s will.” They continued, “Based on Lee Jin Wook’s testimony, there was no asking of consent for sexual relations nor was consent given by A. In light of this, the indictment and crime cannot be proven.”
He then counter-sued his accuser for making a false accusation. In 2017, his accuser was found not guilty of making a false accusation, but Lee Jin Wook's side appealed the verdict – and she was sentenced to a minimum of eight months in prison for defamation in February 2018.
The court stated: “As Oh has common sense, she likely knew the difference between sexual relations that one secretly does not want to engage in and rape that occurs with oppressive tactics. Therefore, Oh’s accusation against Lee is a false accusation that goes against objective truth.”
Sources:
–https://www.soompi.com/article/878513wpp/lee-jin-wook-and-a-call-records-texts-photo-evidenced-released-both-sides-explain
–https://www.soompi.com/article/1121055wpp/woman-accused-lee-jin-wook-sexual-assault-receives-sentence
–https://www.asianjunkie.com/2017/06/16/lee-jin-wook-did-not-ask-for-or-get-consent-of-alleged-sexual-assault-victim-judge-says/
The cinematography, the writing, the acting, and the set/costume design were all incredibly impressive to me (except some of the dissatisfying ways the drama wrapped up—that still didn't feel necessarily so disappointing to me; some elements felt very, very satisfying and cathartic), and I found it a worthwhile watch, that would rank among some of the better dramas I've seen, still considering myself a pretty picky watcher.
If somebody's coming here to see whether they should watch it, I'd say give it a shot! I enjoyed the journey it took me on.
The way that they took the time for each other; learnt languages for each other, and said "See you." instead of "Goodbye."—the sacrifices they made for each other and the way their love visibly lit them up from the inside. It made me laugh a lot, but I sat there and bawled after I had finished, and several weeks in I'm still tearing up thinking about it.
I really loved how the foundation of their relationship was a respect, near reverence, and have found the interpretations of Ae-Shin symbolically representing the spirit of Korea interesting. I still have a lot to think about, and a lot more to learn about Korean (and more broadly, colonial) history, and though this may not be a nonfiction piece, the pain in that history is still very much real. Stories like this make me start thinking about how to keep the flame alive.
A lot of my favorite dramas are the more melancholic slowburn slices of life with thriller subplots (for example; My Mister, or One Spring Night, which both had significant stalking and abuse subplots in them, while still being healing and at a slower pace), and in general the merging and fluidity of genre is something that really draws me in about Kdramas.
I really, really loved the feeling this drama created in me—and I loved the ending so much. I really grew to love the characters (especially the two leading characters), and the setting beside the sea. It left me feeling very satisfied, and at peace with the world, and myself.♡
I think one of the largest strengths of this drama to me is how genuinely poetic it was; it had a lot of good and meaningful line-by-line writing, metaphors, subtext, and references to outside poetry. Another big strength was theme; within the scope of a fake marriage trope,
Expanding more on that—I found this drama had an interesting and refreshing take on the institution of marriage, unconventionality and compatibility. I was impressed by the way it had an exploration of feminism, patriarchy and women's issues as they exist in modern society and going back some generations, in workplace harassment, in following your heart's desires as a woman (as far as dreams, ambitions and love go), and a woman's role in marriage and in society as a married or unmarried woman.
I found the characters and, especially the friendships, very interesting—and I found myself caring about those a lot, and there was a secondary couple I loved (bra couple). Unfortunately, especially towards the end, I found myself not really caring about much of the other romance plots—and I think it's because I found a lack of compelling chemistry between them (especially between the main couple). Even if I liked elements of each character in theory, as a romance—I feel like it's a genre where (especially when the third act breakup/separation hits) I NEED to ultimately care about whether most of the couples ends up together or not by the end... and in this respect, I felt like this drama let me down.
Otherwise, I liked the more mellow element of it—and I like how it kept that feeling throughout, while never feeling too slow-paced to me. There were some scenes that were so well acted and well written, I felt winded. It was a good drama for me—it just fell short to me of being great, or exceptionally memorable.
Though it's maybe not a "perfect" representation for me and my own experiences (I've never found one), and it took me an episode or two to get into, I feel like it's a very sensitive, compassionate depiction so far—and without going into details, I think the FL is a very well-rounded character.
There are several strong themes at play in the core of this – that in a world where women's wants, needs and boundaries are disrespected because of what they can be perceived to give and sacrifice to men; that they can live for themselves, and can begin again – can find healthier lives and build better relationships for themselves. It's not just a drama for women, but for men too – in a society where the ML is constantly looked down upon for his life circumstances, he finds strength, empowerment and fulfilment in his new relationship as much as she does.
I think this has easily snuck it's way into being one of my favourites. In my opinion, it's a masterpiece of writing, direction and acting. It spoke a lot to me, and is definitely a story that will live with me for a long time.
I found the way that the characters progressed in many ways, and were finding new areas they needed to liberate themselves very true to life. You can really imagine a life beyond the screen for them; seeing life less in the preliminary lifestyle of "I will be happy when I get to this destination", or "I will be happy when I move out of this place", and instead building a life that makes way for happiness, and finding ways to take it in as you're living in it.
I think the ending was more symbolic than open—it referred to previous conversations, and states in the characters and previous visual or spoken metaphors (birds, coins, homelessness, liberation, Christianity, determination); I think the more I've sat with it, the more it's come to me.
There are a lot of very interesting people who have engaged and grappled with this drama in many places, and I think those who resonated a lot with it would benefit from trying to find them where they can.