Utsukushii Kare (2021)

There's *a lot* of angst and a very complicated dynamic, but it's good.

I really liked this one. I won't lie...there was a *ton* of angst. Like seriously, a lot. The dynamic between Hira and Kiyoi is very complicated and rocky, and they both have a lot of faults. The most prominent being that Hira only thinks about his own feelings and Kiyoi not expressing his feelings clearly. Although Kiyoi seems like an ass at the start, you start to better understand him and Hira more as the story develops and I genuinely felt a connection to both characters. I wish we could've gotten another episode or two at least, but I really liked the short and concise story. I see that the filming for the sequel movie started so I'll be looking forward to it!

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It Gives, But at What Cost?

Honestly I found myself being annoyed more than anything. Like I understand that this is a BL and all of them are kind of camp, but if Kiyoi treated me the same way he treats Hira? Absolutely not. It gets to the point where Hira straight up felt like a masochist for the entirety of the show. Even leaving the second love interest, who seemed like a much better healthier option for him, for Kiyoi. Who he wasn't sure like/loved him enough to be in a relationship with him. It was also annoying with how long it took Kiyoi to realize his true feelings for Hira, even when they had been graduated from high school and he had more than enough time to process his feelings. Like, I love me a good toxic relationship as much as the next BL fujoshi, but this BL just felt straight up mean-spirited at points. But I mean, if they like it I love it, more power to the two of them. Either way, if you find yourself struggling to get into this BL because of the weird relationship between the two male leads, I would suggest straying away/dropping it. As their relationship doesn't really get better until late season 2/the movie.

There are a lot of positives to the BL though. One being the very unique set up. Despite being a school BL and mostly set during school hours. A lot of the show feels different and never seen before. The cinematography and music was also pretty nice and I started listening to the OST on my own time. Not something I do with just any BL music. The other positives of this BL are how Hira and Kiyoi both have a clear goal/hobby that will be developed later in the second season and movie. The writers clearly knew how and when they would develop these character traits and skills. A nice payoff when you come back to season one and see how far they've come not only in their relationship, but careers as well.

Overall, I give it a 6/10. This is most definitely a personal problem though, as I just don't really find myself caring for Hira and Kiyoi to fall in love. I just never experience that butterflies in my stomach sensation within the first season and that's pretty much all I ask for within a BL. However I do appreciate everything this BL has to offer and suggest that anyone interested in it gives it an earnest watch with an open mind.

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Japanese BL about a student who stalks & falls in love with his bully & the soundtrack is excellent.

I thought this was going to be a typical student falls for his bully BL and it kinda is but a better description would be Japanese BL about a student who stalks & falls in love with his bully. The former would've left me annoyed, the latter left me baffled. Like he bullies him and that's not okay but he stalks him and is generally really creepy towards his bully and that's also not okay.

The love story was interesting because it was both beautiful & filled with red flags from both sides. It was an unconventional love story because regardless of both of them kinda taking advantage of each other, they did fall in love. They do seem to somehow belong together.

Though I couldn't really root for anyone, the confession scene was heartbreakingly beautiful.
It had some really creative & cool scenes which I loved.
Also the music was great. Seriously great soundtrack.

In conclusion: it's not okay to bully your crush. It is also not okay to stalk your crush.

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Hella Toxic!

In one sentence, they're toxic! Kiyoi doesn't deserve Hira. Hira is too good for kiyoi. Kayoma is the Hira should be with. He is the only one that treated Hira right.

Kiyoi never loved Hira, he just loved the attention he got! They both were mentally fucked up! He was just searching for the attention he never got from his parents. He thought Hira was selfish because he never asked how he felt! But he's the one who never thought how his behaviour is hurting Hira. Even he badmouthed about him to his co actor.

On the other hand, Hira had no self respect! Kiyoi treated him like shit still he kept giving! He probably loves hurting himself! If this is love, then it's better to stay away from it!

The only person loveable here is Koyoma! He really cared about Hira and even after being rejected, he thought about his happiness! Hira and koyoma would make a great couple!

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Uncomfortable but compelling

These boys have SO MANY problems, they both need therapy but instead they have each other.

One content warning I would like to make since it caught me off guard and made me pretty uncomfortable, the main character Hira has two scenes where he imagines shooting his classmates with an automatic weapon. He is not a bad guy but deeply troubled, and it doesn't really get much better on the mental health front as the show progresses.
This is a very interesting show though, and there is so much to unpack and discover with both of the main characters and the POV shift on the 5th episode really helps with that and offers insight into how Kiyoi feels, and what has led him to become like he is.

I am very much looking forward to starting the second season and finding out where these two absolute messes go from here.

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Not for everyone...

To be honest,at first i didnt like it. felt somehow cringy and gave toxic vibe. BUT... as i continued to watch i realized that it actually depicts real life struggles and relationship dynamics. I mean,we have a guy on the spectrum who falls in love with a guy who feels so out of his league it's impossible to have him, so he resumes to love him and worship him as a king/god, because that's the only kind of love he thinks he can give and have. And then,Kiyoi,the guy he put on a pedestal,loves him back but it's so difficult to break the wall Hira built that he gets frustrated,angry and gets hurt everytime he tries to approach him from a different angle. seriously...thats the closest to real life as you can get. It's not the typical highschool romance and i loved it in the end!

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kazuki my beloved, you deserved better

first of all, i preview this review with saying i might be biased in everything i say because i've been watching the drama for akira takano (kazuki's actor) and so i might be very attached (too attached, even) to kazuki's character.

anyway, i lowkey hated the first fex episode (until kazuki came in the picture) because i don't understand the relationship between hira and kiyoi. i mean obviously they are not right for each other, and kiyoi is just lowkey lunatic and violent towards hira ? also when they met again and hira was 'dating' kazuki he made lowkey very homophobic comments bc he was angry at hira for dating someone else ? and ? bro i get that you are jealous bc you'll never be as good as kazuki but please, have some respect :skull emoji:

i guess i just didn't really like either hira and kiyoi for most of the drama (up until the last episode actually, where they have some kind of character development) but i think both of them were mean and unfair towards kazuki and so i automatically want to fistfight them bc i just love kazuki you know... but also, they gave me akira takano crying and being sad and looking pretty and clingy and whiny and... thank y'all for giving me life, i didn't know i needed to see him as the perfect boyfriend so much.

ANYWAYS, they really had a character development in the last episode i guess (thanks kazuki for helping them get together even though you were heart broken and low key cheated on) and i feel they're going to be less annoying in the second season (and we see kazuki in it) so i'll definitely watch it i guess... i have hopes for it !

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An honest review on the drama and its fandom

I watched this drama almost three months back. I re-watched it a couple of times too. At the end of the day, my rating would be:
# Unbiased rating: 10
# Biased rating based on personal preference: 6 (9.5 for the last episode though) - cause few elements were triggering for me and hence it is not my cup of tea.
# My overall rating above is an average of both my unbiased and biased ratings.

I will not get into the story. But what I would like to point out based on the silent observation I did on all the fans and non-fans for this drama is that, the fans are way more toxic than the ones who didn't like this drama. I have seen that those people who didn't like this drama don't go around bashing the people who love this drama. But the other way around is extremely prevalent. The fans claim to "Understand that people have different opinions", but at the same time bashfully reply to those people who don't like this drama and try to force them into liking it. Hypocrisy at it's best huh.
They claim that if you don't like a drama, you should just drop it and not give a low rating. But I see the same people going around giving low ratings to the dramas they didn't like. Hypocrisy at its best once again huh.
I am pretty sure that keeping aside those people who dropped this drama without finishing it, there are others like me who watched this show properly and understood the story and the characters and still didn't like it for our own reasons.
One more thing I would like to point out is that, if something is toxic, or if something is a bad habit or a negative trait, we classify that trait as negative. This doesn't mean that the person is bad, but it means he has negative traits. So accordingly, Hira and Kiyoi have toxic traits which in no way falls under the healthy category. And that is a fact! It doesn't mean that the characters are bad. I haven't read the novels, but people have said that part 2 has character development where both the leads have to work on themselves because of these toxic traits. But the show ended with only the clearance of miscommunications between them and no proper character development whatsoever. So obviously people who didn't like this show and who haven't read the novels, will consider this relationship to be unhealthy and toxic, which it is, if the characters don't heal themselves. On a side note, I would never call this drama as abusive as there were no abusive elements whatsoever. A little bit of bullying in one of the episodes but that's it. (Hira was the one following Kiyoi around, so if he was pushed then it is all his fault and not exactly Kiyoi's)
To the people who say "Everyone loves differently, if it doesn't fit your perspective, doesn't mean that it isn't love". Love has various forms. Absolutely! But if something falls in the unhealthy category, then it is toxic. Period! Which if not healed and worked upon, the relationship will not work long term. No one said people are ideal or perfect. We all have good and bad traits. But we have to call a trait for what it is. If it is negative or toxic then call it that. What is the point of saying "There was nothing toxic in this show. It was a beautiful love story with flawed characters." Exactly! Flawed characters who have 'toxic traits' because of what they both went through in their lives! Call it that. Why are these people trying to pretend like everything is rosy here. Damn, this means they are the ones viewing things through a rosy glass and not the people who like fluff stuff instead. And once again, these same people go around bashing other dramas because it wasn't their cup of tea or because there was too much fluff. Hypocrisy alert!
To the people saying "Don't compare fiction with real life, watch the story for what it is. Don't expect an ideal relationship in this drama and then say you didn't like it". Wait a min. I think I saw the same people comment something along the lines of "These are flawed characters which makes them beautiful unlike the fluff you like. Cause in real life, everyone has flaws and not everything is rosy.", "Everyone loves differently, just because it doesn't match your definition of love doesn't mean its wrong", "Not everyone has a healthy relationship." This means, these people are comparing the drama to real people in real life. That is, they are comparing fiction to real life. I smell hypocrisy in the air.
To the people saying "If you don't like the drama, leave. It is dangerous to prevent other people from watching this show because of your opinion." I would like to ask one thing. What are you doing? Aren't you forcing people to like this show because of your opinion?

I usually don't read reviews and comments, but this time I had this urge to see the reviews and what people's opinions were. And all that I saw was the hypocrisy exhibited by the people who like this show. With statements like "People who don't like this show are illiterate, butt-hurt cracks", "Only the overseas people have problems with this drama", "Only blind people will not like this show' etc. etc., the fans are exhibiting the same traits that they accuse the non-fans of. Maybe the haters of this show say a lot of mean stuff. But I guarantee you, the fans of this show are not better. In fact, they are way more rude and that too in a indirect way. They pretend like they respect your opinion but indirectly attack you. Such beautiful manipulation I say.
Hence, I decided to write this huge essay. And I am going back to not reading comments again. Else I will lose my faith in the goodness of people.

Coming to my review, I will give full marks to this drama for what it was trying to portray. It shows one aspect of complexity of human nature. Some people in real life are like these characters and that is what this show is trying to portray - one unique kind of story. The cinematography is beautiful. The actors were amazing. The storyline was awesome and the highlight of this show is the switchover in the narration between both the leads. Now in a biased way, I wouldn't watch this show again except for the last episode. I guess the last episode was the only part where I felt like both these people were emerging to be more than their unhealthy traits. It was a beautiful conversation between them. I know that the previous episodes are leading up to this beautiful ending, but they weren't my cup of tea especially because of Hira's obsessive traits.
This show isn't exactly dark like a lot of other shows. But it can affect your mind, especially someone like me who is in a depressed phase of her life. Cause after watching this show I fell into a lower state of mind (I mean sad), cause there were a few elements like Hira's obsessive tactics which kind of triggered me.
This is one of the reasons why I loved Kiyoi's character more. Though it would look like he was jerk in the beginning episodes, after seeing his perspective, everything made perfect sense. And his character was way more healthier for me to watch than Hira's.
I am someone who likes a balance. I don't like too much fluff or too much serious stuff. That is why my favorite shows would be bad buddy and I told sunset about you.

Anyways, EVERYBODY SHOULD GIVE THIS DRAMA A TRY. YOU WILL NEED A COUPLE OF REWATCHES TO UNDERSTAND SOME HIDDEN DETAILS. AND IN CASE, YOU DON'T LIKE THIS SHOW, IT'S OKAY. DON'T READ THE COMMENTS BELOW AND TRY TO FIGHT WITH THEM OR FORCE YOURSELF TO LIKE THE SHOW. ONLY THING IS, DON'T GIVE A RATING WITHOUT WATCHING THE SHOW COMPLETELY. BECAUSE THE LAST FEW EPISODES BRING A CLEAR IDEA AS TO WHAT IS HAPPENING.
THE HIGHLIGHT OF THIS SHOW IS ALWAYS THE LAST EPISODE (MY FAVOURITE!).

At the end of the day all that I would say is, as much as people have a right to like this show, people also have a right to dislike it and express their views. You cannot obsessively go around bashing others up and defending the show. I have seen so many accounts on MDL, replying to every person who didn't like this show and trying to refute their opinion. They think that the drama deserves a higher rating, which obviously it does, because this drama has a strong storyline with depth and details compared to many high-rated shows. But you have to remember that the rating option is there for a reason. It is there to see what the general public's rating is and not just for one specific group. You claim that the rating dropped because haters made so many fake accounts to bring this 'masterpiece drama' down cause they are ignorant. What if I say, the current rating is where it is because the fans made so many fake accounts to bring this show up? Think about it...
Now you might ask me why am I wasting time with all this. I guess as an unbiased watcher of this show, I just ended up reading the reviews and comments and felt the need to point out the indirect contradiction and hypocrisy in the statements of the people who are obsessively trying to support this show.

Signing off
~A Human Being

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refreshing and intense

i didn't think that i'd find myself liking a japanese drama in late 2021. in my opinion, japanese BL dramas have consistently been lackluster, boring, repetitive, and just...not good. so i was reluctant to like this show. i was REALLY reluctant. alas, i found myself unable to stop thinking about these two. when i first started watching, most of the episodes weren't out yet, and for the first time in as long as i can remember i was itching to know what happened next in a show. maybe im just too picky, maybe i just don't watch things enough, i don't know, but it's rare for me to think this much about a show

what i liked:

story:

this drama has made me want to read the novel. i will be buying it whenever i am next able to visit japan. the relationship between the two main characters is one that reminds me of the reason i enjoy BL manga in the first place: the darker stories, the animal-like, intense emotions, veering into territory that may be dubbed problematic and toxic by some, but i LIVE off this shit. i dont want to see the same kira kira romance repeated over and over. i want something a bit more gritty. i want the characters to be a little off. yeah, i know it's toxic and wouldn't make sense irl. that's the point. that's why stories exist. it was such a breath of fresh air to see their intense, hectic relationship portrayed as these two characters battled with their emotions and morals. i especially love how hira viewed kiyoi as a king or god plus the cinematic actions taken to represent this and i'll talk about this more later.

i don't think the story was too complicated or that the characters were too complicated, but it was so different from what i've seen from Japanese BL and BL in general, i guess, in the past years that it was an entertaining story to watch. at times, it felt like the two main characters were the only people in the world to each other, and i liked this aspect especially. maybe to some it would make it feel like the world wasn't fleshed out enough or that other character's didn't feel real, and i can agree with this somewhat, but to me it immersed me within the mindset of the main couple, that only them two existed, and further intensified how much they meant to each other. i LOVE how creepy hira came across, and i love how this was openly accepted as creepy, how mean kiyoi was. i loved all of it. it felt raw and real and toxic and. yeah. at times i even got uncomfortable watching hira, but i loved how it made me uncomfortable. i love stories like this.

in terms of directing, there were some compositional choices that alluded to kiyoi's position as "king" that i appreciated. one of them was when they were all sitting at hira's low table in the dining room? kitchen? area? and kiyoi is the only one perched on the couch, while everybody else is on their knees. the shot is set up so that the viewers eye is guided to the "king" on his "throne". also when they start to become "friends" and kiyoi sits in a chair while hira lays on the ground in front of him to do homework. another example is when hira is made to bow down and kiss kiyoi's hand, a more in-your-face symbolism, but i appreciated it nontheless. it also made it contextually significant when the characters would be set at the same level, or when hira would be placed on top of kiyoi, symbolizing that their roles are becoming more equal in each others eyes as they mature.

oh also, kiyoi not becoming an instant success overnight and having to resort to diner theatre and work his way up was also a nice touch that showed how human his character is.

acting/cast:

okay, so for a drama literally named "beautiful him", yusei yagi doesn't really cut it. he's pretty okay looking, and in some of that soft warm lighting i genuinely think he's pretty. not horrible to look at like many of the BL dramas ive seen.....but i have two excuses for this. one, it's BL, a smaller and less sought after industry, especially in japan. you're not gonna get the most attractive, best, expensive actors. two, i think the fact that he's not really stunning brings humanness to his story and role, and also makes yusei's powerful and king-like performance more striking because he's able to have such a large presence. i really liked his acting. there were sometimes these subtle vulnerabilities in his eyes that he only showed to hira. so good. for a BL drama, you can really tell that he had passion for this role, or at least that he is passionate about his acting career enough to do a good job. sometimes yusei slurred his lines a little bit but i didn't really mind. his angry scenes were really nice. there was a lot of inner conflict kiyoi had and yusei reflected that in every one of his actions. really really nice job.

hagiwara riku was EXCELLENT. i think he got cuter as the drama went on but he has this puppy-ish appearance with a bit of a pathetic slouch and a sad expression. it fits this role SO well. the different ways that he would say "kiyoi" were sometimes so full of emotion that i just sat there like, "damn". he portrays that creepy, pathetic, kind of insecure but incredibly loyal character extremely well. he looks more like a "commoner" than yusei yagi which i also thought was very fitting because yusei has more of a pretty boy idol type look, which, well, was his character. that creepy, raw smile that crept onto his face and made me uncomfortable when he saw kiyoi again for the first time since highschool.....SO GOOD....the way he said "that's impossible" during kiyoi's confession scene....ugh, so good. i finished today and i already want to rewatch it. maybe i'm just starved for good acting because of how shit a lot of BL have been lately, but god did i enjoy hagiwara's performance.

music:

kinda random at times. i liked the darker sound of the end theme, especially at the end of the first episode. really got me hooked. not much to say. one thing though is that the opening song was way too happy for the tone of the drama, but okay.

rewatch value:

i finished watching today and i already want to rewatch.

things i think could be improved:

pacing was weird at times. i wished kiyoi's character got a little more fleshed out, maybe then it wouldnt have felt so weird. i feel like hira's first confession moment happened too soon. could have felt more natural if maybe there was an extra episode or two. another weird pacing part was how quickly the final confession happened.

loved how hira's character was obsessed with kiyoi but i do wish there was a bit more to his personality besides he likes kiyoi and taking pictures, but we saw a bit of that personality shine through at the very end after they get together.

they actually kissed which is good. the first one you could barely see their lips touch, though...... that last episode though, nice, but after seeing how intense the scenes in dramas like "Dark Blue and Moonlight" got i feel like they could have gone a little further with the make out considering how intense these characters feelings re for each other, but it didn't really ruin it for me. just maybe less vague silhouette neck caressing. c'mon. but i guess we've gotta ease the general audience into these things.....

overall:

this is the only other drama i have written a review about on this website besides a rant about coffee and vanilla. really hope that says something. go rubber ducky.

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Competently made though unexceptional

This BL follows a tried-and-tested formula in many ways: one-sided love on the part of an awkward unpopular guy for a popular guy, that is until it turns out to be anything but one-sided. The production values are, nevertheless, rather high. The scenes are beautifully shot, and there are no scenes that feel unnecessary or digressive.

Hira, being the awkward, stuttering guy who is bullied by others, is the character one sympathizes with first. Yet, it may be hard to understand his obsession with Kiyoi, who is one of those who order him about in school even if he is somewhat more reasonable than others. Is this some sort of Stockholm-Syndrome romance? He supposedly falls in love with Kiyoi because Kiyoi saves him from embarrassment, but Kiyoi does not even do so intentionally--he saves Hira simply by walking into the class and grabbing everyone's attention.

Kiyoi isn't the worst bully for sure, but his behavior towards Hira can be regarded as abusive too. But this is BL in which some borderline perverse sorts of relationships are par for the course. Even though we finally see things from his perspective in Episode 5, his behavior towards Hira isn't exactly very nice. Could he blame Hira for having no inkling that his love is not one-sided? In contrast, Hira's friend in college, Koyama, is such a sweetheart that one either wishes Hira would end up with him or that he would be able to find happiness. But I guess the equivalent of the second-male-lead syndrome in BLs is the third-male-lead syndrome.

The issue of romanticizing a somewhat abusive relationship aside, the series is nicely made. There are only six short episodes, but the storytelling does not feel rushed or inadequate. The young actors are surprisingly good in their roles too. It is worth a watch.

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utsukushii kare/my beautiful man

i wasn't sure about this one at first mostly because of the way kiyoi behaved on the first episode, but i just finished the last 5 episodes and the LAST TWO make such a difference on his character and they way we understand him.

the reason why kiyoi started by bossing hira around was because he was trying to understand if hira was just like everyone else, meaning, if he was just nice to him because he wanted something from kiyoi. he later realizes that no, hira is different. he kept his promise to not tell anyone about kiyoi dancing, he always had a look in his eyes, he told him he liked him, and most of all he showed all of that by standing up for kiyoi in front of the entire school. kiyoi had always been alone even though he always had people surrounding him but finally he found someone who didn't make him lonely anymore, who was honest on the way he felt. you can also tell how the "gross/disgusting" comments don't really have much meaning when kiyoi later says them, he doesn't feel that way he just says it cause he doesn't know how to react.

it's why everything hurts much more when he kissed hira. hira didn't take that extra step and later on he didn't even reach out with his new number! kiyoi was heartbroken, "you kissed my hand! you said you liked me but then you didn't reach out to me! did you even mean anything you said at all?". with us seeing hira's pov, we could tell why: hira always thought they were in two different levels, a god and a servant, and when kiyoi heard that, everything hurt worse than before. "im not a god!", "i want to touch each other like any other man". of course he'd be upset, he thought out of all people hira would be the one who understood him better than anyone but until the very end, hira didn't understand him at all.

just like kiyoi said, hira could be arrogant sometimes. he didn't try to understand kiyoi he just looked at him and thought "we're from two different worlds. nothing could ever happen" and took it as the truth without even asking or trying to understand.

.....idk if you can tell but this entire review is just me expression how interesting i think kiyoi is. he truly is a fascinating character.

finally id love to point out that, in the end, after hira truly does realize how kiyoi feels and that he is just a man like any other, he stops stuttering around him, there's no reason for him to be nervous anymore. they're on the same floor, kiyoi isn't and never was higher than him, so there's no reason to be anxious about being around him anymore.

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