@peng-peng

Thank you for your insight. I really appreciate your explanation from your point of view. Cos I did read the translation by Koala and didn't agree with a lot of her opinions. Like how XL was a better fit for XY and that he loved her more than Jing does and also the implication that XY didn't love CX in a romantic way only because he didn't reveal his heart to her way back when. Since you don't need to know if someone loves you in order to love them back. But yeah I've been rewatching the drama and rereading the book to try to figure out XY and who she really loves cos sometimes it seems like jing is everything then other times it seems she's pursuing XL. So thank you for your perspective. It really helps. 

@Palesun

Again, I can't understand why she made all of those overtures to him and TH implying that he was the one she wanted most to be with, if Jing was the one she truly loved and wanted. Also in the variety show hello Saturday, when TJC asked YZ between Jing and XL who XY would choose to spend the rest of her life with on a desserted island she said XL.

Um...about variety show. .I am not sure how much they are serious when YZ saying XY would choose XL for desserted island. Nope I dont agree with TH implying XL is the one XY want to spend the rest of her life with. About XL being abusive, sure many of us I think are quite uneasy for us (especially me who used to see some of my relatives actually take abusers as life partner..saw how much they suffer., abuser exists and so are the women who take them in real life. 100% no good result). But this is fiction. .and bad boy theories are all around in fiction,  we have to see it in that way, made opinion from that way. Because it is there. But XL in Lost You Forever is never to portray a good romantic life partner for a woman, an ordinary woman,  if we takes XY as "a woman". Men like XL exists, they are never really good in love, may not treat someone they love properly, although some are still manage to be good in other aspect of life, meaning, they can still be good human, but not in domestic life. To me that's what ZX and XL stands for. To me what XL stands in XY is fear, world exploration, sympathy, mental freedom that made her heal and grow as a person. And yep it will be wrong to say XY doesn't love XL at all throughout. She does (Tong Hua has this style of making her female lead fall for two men in her stories). Lover Bugs and her mirror are to proof but it is love on a woman's wild + traumatic side, which XY is consciously not letting herself into. XL end up killing that side for her by killing the lovers bugs and the mirror but gives big belly doll which has his affection and gift for her instead, although which is well keep hidden, as he wants this side of him to be hidden forever but to make her happy. She only keep XL in her "mirror", if mirror represents oneself reflection symbolic,  then I think it represents one side of XY. I can never see YaoLiu bond to be anything more than that. 

And if one ask why XY never put TSJ in her "mirror".  To my personal opinion, she's too shy to do that and he was her true crush in her very very conscious self which makes her silly side come out.  I think she's aware of her own affection and also has this protecting herself from falling. With XL, she let herself more free. 

Yeo. .Tong Hua has definitly make YaoLiu in "what if" but YaoJing is "what is". And Im actually fine with that.  

And I actually agree with Tong Hua herself on Lost You Forever = Sauvignon Blanc is not a tragedy. Because if YaoLiu is that much deep love then it will be tragdy but since it is not...it is not then.😊


@TinaL

"Especially when you can't even pinpoint when exactly xiao yao started liking xl. Her attraction to xl seems to be out of nowhere."

I totally agree. I've been going back trying to figure that out myself. In the English translation from Koala, she opines that XY already had XL in her heart when Jing asked her to wait for him for 15 years in the dragon bone prison and she agreed to not let another man into her heart in that time. 

I've been reading an older discussion on this site about the song Favor mortal fireworks. In my opinion it's jing's and XY's song and they've played it in the drama mostly but not exclusively in jing and XY scenes. They actually played it in one scene with XL and XY, after she removed the bug from CX and moved it into XL and the Haoling army began to chase them, XL took her under the sea to explore and that's when she recorded the 2nd memory of him in her mirror. They played that song in that scene. And I didn't think it fit in there at all. At that point XY didn't seem to see him as anything more than a friend. He had already fallen for her but she seemed oblivious to anything romantic with him. And that song, as so many have said is so deep and full of meaning, I could never understand why they played it there. 

@Winny Aye

Thanks so much for your insight as well. All of this is really helping me for I've been struggling with trying to understand XY and what and whom she really wants.

I just think that whether irl or fiction, it is NEVER ok to romanticize or normalize brutal, abusive characters or behavior and make them seem deep or charming or interesting. They never are, not even in fiction and the fact that so many authors seem to subscribe to that is mind boggling and just really sad and dangerous and frightening. And that XL is TH's favorite character, well, I don't even know what to say to that. 

 Palesun:

@Winny Aye

Thanks so much for your insight as well. All of this is really helping me for I've been struggling with trying to understand XY and what and whom she really wants.

I just think that whether irl or fiction, it is NEVER ok to romanticize or normalize brutal, abusive characters or behavior and make them seem deep or charming or interesting. They never are, not even in fiction and the fact that so many authors seem to subscribe to that is mind boggling and just really sad and dangerous and frightening. And that XL is TH's favorite character, well, I don't even know what to say to that. 

Yes. ..I dont like abusive male leads in fictions too . But I do like how XL is portrayed as unofficial one in Lost You Forever. Even if women have desire such men it should not be official. I am not sure how she meant XL is her fav in which way. I don't think she meant it in a way of "ideal romantic partner". I think she more of idealized Jing. And we don't have to worry about XY feeling for Jing, it has so many many evidences. Jing certainly is not 100% green flat, but XY still longs for him. Thats one of the evidence. She no way chose him out of comfort. But Tong Hua did make XL very memorable (especially with not letting known of his feeling which left heart wrenched and hanged...but but then I think he's the most suitable character to be in charge for it).  And I guess its a bit problematic. I dont know..I think sometimes, authors can be influenced by real life. I am guessing there's must be something that fancinate her to create XL?  I don't know. .I certainly think not as "perfect romantic partner".

from what I read here mentioned as I recall someone mentioned about Tencent's video about XY's relationships, went to search for it lol

https://m.youtube.com/shorts/KyiuEeVVPUQ

I also found this video, this is so🦊🥰💕 wanted to share here

https://m.youtube.com/shorts/PCo072esfZ0

Also, I think someone mentioned about people's/fan's preferences or something, that may help explain or understand varying interpretations of the characters and the relationships and the whole story🙃

For the OSTs, let me be more clear here lol I think I was referring to the Favor Mortal Fireworks as was mentioned already here lol. I stand corrected with what I said earlier forget it😓

 Symbolika1:

He knew he's priority is to his soldiers FIRST. Xiao Yao is not his priority :).

He knew his end. Death.

Jing is Life. Above everything Jing choose Xiao.  I don't relate to irl TV shows, I only relate on this story writers words. And she Xiao Yao the character=>  choose him too.

Happy end! :)

That's what I think exactly. .😁💜 Jing is life and Xiao Yao chose life. ❤️🦊

 Palesun:

@TinaL

"Especially when you can't even pinpoint when exactly xiao yao started liking xl. Her attraction to xl seems to be out of nowhere."

I totally agree. I've been going back trying to figure that out myself. In the English translation from Koala, she opines that XY already had XL in her heart when Jing asked her to wait for him for 15 years in the dragon bone prison and she agreed to not let another man into her heart in that time. 

That koala page is a XL fan, she writes a whole paragraph about xl before you get to read the translation,I only read it at wattpad.

Again XY loves Jing, if she didn’t she wouldn’t have accepted the 15 year promise, she wouldn’t try to wear dresses for Jing, she wouldn’t be jealous & be petty cos she thinks Jing has forgotten her,she wouldn’t tell Jing to feed her cos she saw YY try to feed jing(tho he didn’t accept it from YY), she wouldn’t cough up blood & be sick in bed with she thought Jing had a child with YY, she wouldn’t think about him & in fact move on if she didn’t love him, she wouldn’t go to Qing qui to personally deliver her wedding invitation to jing(she could’ve sent someone else to do it) cos she wanted to see him & indirectly tell him you broke my heart but I’m still yearning for you & want you to come back to me, she wouldn’t be single for soo many years & have insomnia, she wouldn’t have gone to see Jing & talk to him after running away from her wedding. All this indicates she TRULY loves him. Abusive men are a NO GO in my books cos I’ve known someone who died in the hands of her abuser even when he claimed he loved her. 

@Peng-peng

"She is in love with TSJ. Because  the one her heart has been yearning for since before the break up  and after it and is still yearning for, is TSJ  and this is what she refuses to admit. Why?  because she is in pain and proud. She helds her heart because her heart though  broken, is  still fully "In love" with TSJ. She fell 1rst for YSQ but ended up falling in love fully with TSJ"

"is still fully 'in love' with TSJ"💕💕💕 but I also felt bad for XY for that struggle on her part for falling in love and I think the author described her pain so well 

Y'all I'm so pissed, so there's this thai YouTube channel that has been doing reaction to lost you forever and they're a yaojing fan.  They've just posted that they won't be continuing the reaction anymore after being bullied by xl fans.  They've deleted every reaction they've made so far from ep 1-27. I was really looking forward to ep 28 reaction. 

I'm sorry but yl/ xl are insufferable and it's getting out of hands 

@Romans_Revenge

"That koala page is a XL fan, she writes a whole paragraph about xl before you get to read the translation,I only read it at wattpad.

Again XY loves Jing, if she didn’t she wouldn’t have accepted the 15 year promise, she wouldn’t try to wear dresses for Jing, she wouldn’t be jealous & be petty cos she thinks Jing has forgotten her,she wouldn’t tell Jing to feed her cos she saw YY try to feed jing(tho he didn’t accept it from YY), she wouldn’t cough up blood & be sick in bed with she thought Jing had a child with YY, she wouldn’t think about him & in fact move on if she didn’t love him, she wouldn’t go to Qing qui to personally deliver her wedding invitation to jing(she could’ve sent someone else to do it) cos she wanted to see him & indirectly tell him you broke my heart but I’m still yearning for you & want you to come back to me, she wouldn’t be single for soo many years & have insomnia, she wouldn’t have gone to see Jing & talk to him after running away from her wedding. All this indicates she TRULY loves him. Abusive men are a NO GO in my books cos I’ve known someone who died in the hands of her abuser even when he claimed he loved her. "

I agree with everything you said. 

 Winny Aye:

That's what I think exactly. .😁💜 Jing is life and Xiao Yao chose life. ❤️🦊

Jing is life and XY chose life💕💕

 TinaL:

Y'all I'm so pissed, so there's this thai YouTube channel that has been doing reaction to lost you forever and they're a yaojing fan.  They've just posted that they won't be continuing the reaction anymore after being bullied by xl fans.  They've deleted every reaction they've made so far from ep 1-27. I was really looking forward to ep 28 reaction. 

I'm sorry but yl/ xl are insufferable and it's getting out of hands 

I am beginning to think now..its abnormal XL fans are too loud. Their love for bad boy tsk😑. i have no problems XL character in total truth and understand the creator making him memorable. ..but the way they make XL as the only hero...that's another level of craziness 

 TinaL:

Y'all I'm so pissed, so there's this thai YouTube channel that has been doing reaction to lost you forever and they're a yaojing fan.  They've just posted that they won't be continuing the reaction anymore after being bullied by xl fans.  They've deleted every reaction they've made so far from ep 1-27. I was really looking forward to ep 28 reaction. 

I'm sorry but yl/ xl are insufferable and it's getting out of hands 

Oh wow, that’s horrible! These mental deranged people who do nothing but bully others cos they don’t choose xl 🤦🏽‍♀️.  If you tell them they’re being aggressive,then they go on a whole rant about why they’re right. Errrmm no, you’re just being rude at your big age being defensive over an abusive character.