I find a good analysis in the comments! @ Alysha Johnson
The reborn JXN was wary of XW. She think she's scare of him because of her past life memories. YET all her actions toward him shown otherwise. Very early on, I believe that she already gravitated toward him because they are fundamentally the same type of people: cunning, manipulative, protective and morally grey as long as they get what they want. That is why despite saying otherwise, I believe JXN is already attracted to XW without knowing it.
She said she's scare of him yet he's the first person she trusted. She trust his ability, and later on trusted his motivations. When others doubted him, she have no doubt. She understand him in a level that even she can't describe. She said she's scare of him yet she share her thoughts and plans with him. Even when she said nothing to him, she have this unexplainable trust that he would understand her and have her back. This level of trust she have for him is unlike any she have with the other suitors.
Secondly, she unawarely treated XW like a friend. She teases him, tell him funny stories of her life, complain about her snacks. All behaviors that are more typical of a friend to lover relationship. She's so comfortable with him to the point even XW asked her, "Am I so nice to you that you think we're already friends?" So despite JXN saying she's scare of the oh so scary XW - on a gut level, she already think of him as her people and let him in.
However, I think the main reason people think JXN loving XW too sudden is because we have been lied to by JXN. In her eyes, XW is this cunning, hard to reach type of person so she put up this iron curtain toward him. She didn't DARE to think he could ever like her, and thus also never DARE to even thought she had any romantic feeling for him. On a conscious level - XW is just too out there. But on a subconscious level, he had already seeped into her heart. I believe their romance has started since episode 1. It is not the romance that is rose-tinted with longing gaze or heart flutterings gestures. It is a romance that is like an underwater current, growing slowly underneath but getting stronger day by day, one that you can't see on the surface but exist as a silent force that pushes them toward one another. Their romance is that of trust-building, which is very crucial for their characters, who are people that are deeply traumatized, jaded and have gone through soo much.
That is why I don't think JXN suddenly like XW. Rather, her feeling for him has been shadow/hidden/denied for a long time. It is only freed when she found out about his identity. With all he have done and her understanding of him, any normal person would understand what's going on. BUT JXN stubbornly put up this wall against him because she has high self-preservation as any normal person should, and because she lack this last piece of the puzzle. When she knew his true identity, she has what she needed and everything about XW finally made sense to her. I think this is where people don't give enough credit or appreciate enough about this JXN character. Despite how she feel, she need things to make sense to her.
When Liu Xan told her to "pity" JXN and she did, I do not interpret that as her "feeling bad" for XW like we would toward a less fortunate person. Rather, I think "pitying" XW here actually mean her "humanizing" XW in her eyes. Let's think about it, XW have had a very pitiful life YET as audience or as JXN, we don't feel very sorry for him. It's because even in his most vulnerable state, when he is in his manic episode due to his trauma, he is still shown to be very scary and dangerous individual. However, when JXN understood who he is, XW turn from an invincible crazy person, to a human being with flesh and blood, who can get hurt, and can also love. Like Liu Xan said, XW is a person with a lot of insecurities, so he doesn't dare to love because he's too afraid of losing it. JXN "pitying" XW is about seeing him from this perspective, and not a stone cold manipulator she so used to. She started to imagine XW as the young DingFei, alone and deathly afraid, the hardship he must have endured to survive. This image slowly replace the previous one of XW - the empty eyes, cold blood face that sneered at her, chased her away and wanted her dead.
I think to think JXN choosing XW because he's the ML is actually a disservice to JXN as a character. She told her dad in the drama that she don't think of getting marry. She had married before so she don't need to do it again. This reborn JXN is someone who can live without a man and is ready to do so. She didn't need to pick XW because she's someone who actually did not need to pick any suitor. So the fact she picked XW is because she WANTED to. There's nothing XW could do, no matter how aggressive he can be, or how many time he get hurt to protect her, he could ever never make JXN pick him if she don't already love him.
When JXN hesitated to agree to marry XW - I see that as a hesitation toward marriage and not toward XW. Again, JXN is a girl who need time to think. And everything has been going too fast, her iron curtain about him has just been lifted, and she doesn't want to get caught up in this whirlwind of emotional high. But being at the brink between life and death can make people very clear-headed because they see clearly what they truly valued underneath all their worries. So when she saw XW shot, and at the point of possibly losing this man forever, she succumb to her gut feeling and admit who she truly wanted, and she wants this man. All that overthinking be damn.
In the end, JXN had removed all the physical and emotional wall that stopped her from loving XW. She understood him, she no longer afraid of him, and she felt what it's like to almost lose him forever, and she accepted and allow herself to love him so it only make sense that she got together with him. She could have live a life without him, but she chose him because she want to spend her life with him. Why? Because despite what she "think", she couldn't help being attracted to this man from the very start.
My analysis is solely based on the story from the drama - not the novel. There has been enough changes that in essence, the drama stand entirely different than the novel as far as the romance go. The ZZ in the drama for JXN is not the same ZZ as the novel. She care for YL but idolize ZZ. So that's why she took care of YL, but broke up with ZZ. Because with ZZ, she idolize the idea of him, the idea of a perfect person and a perfect love. With him, she carried guilts, regrets, what could have been, and her aspirations of being a better person. How "easily" she broke up with ZZ is a testament of how light-hearted this romance is in the drama and is in JXN heart. The drama picked the perfect metaphors for their love - the rare, but delicated porcelain vase that cracks easily and no matter hard you try, can never be restore like how it was.It is loved because it is rare and beautiful, but too fragile to have. ZZ as a romantic partner stand as a metaphoric contrast to XW. ZZ is someone JXN thought she love but dropped when facing the first obstacle. XW is someone she grew to love on a deep level BECAUSE of the obstacles they went through. It's a classic example of: What you think you want VS. What you really wanted.
I think the drama could have use another episode at the end to convey JXN true feeling toward XW. The last few episodes was a bit rushed, and JXN isn't an overly emotionally expressive person. Toward XW the grand declaration of love from her may seem sudden but I do believe that that's the real JXN in love. Thank you for listenign to my TED talk.
ElixerJohn:
Blue Orchid Blossom:
Arbaz Akhtar:
