Kelekat

But then she goes and accuses him of forcing her when she tried to seduce him. Irony right?

Wait, to be clear. I'm not disagreeing or disregarding the point you made. I'm just adding another layer to it - since we're already on the topic of sexual assault - in that accusing someone of forcing you into sex when they in no way did so is also a HUGE problem as well. One which I also actually felt was treated far lighter than it should have been (at least by the FL and the drama itself) as well.

OMG I'm right there with you! I only just decided to scroll further through these comments and now see that I'm not alone. I watched most of this all in one go but now it's taken me 3 days to get through the last 2 episodes.

I'm so frustrated with the way the ROMANCE itself was written. It's like the writers missed their own damn point at times. Like they wrote the whole thing but didn't understand themself exactly what it was the FL did that was wrong in those last few episodes.

They cheapened the story because TWICE now the FL has done some deeply (DEEPLY) hurtful things towards the ML but barely even acknowledges her wrongs (and definitely never learns from it) yet she's given an unwarranted reconciliation anyway - TWICE!

I find that each time the FL does something so wrong towards the ML that it completely justifies him leaving her, the writers use cheap methods to get him to ignore his concerns and reconcile anyway. So she continues to be selfish and completely inconsiderate in the way she treats him. The first time he was justifiably walking away from her she fainted, scaring him. That led to him going back and giving her a chance to reconcile. The next time he thinks she's died so he throws away all his very legitimate concerns about the ways she treats him and reconciles yet again.

It's like manipulative writing LOL! What I mean is. Had she intentionally been doing things like making herself sick or pretending to be hurt to get him to come back to her then we'd see that as clear manipulation on the FL's part. However, neither circumstance involved any manipulative behavior on her part, just the writers themselves. We end up with the ML reconciling with her each time but she hasn't actually earned it. Yes, she eventually shows some level of remorse or understanding of what she did wrong but the things she did in both situations weren't minor. They were pretty severe offenses to do in a relationship. The way she tends to gloss over her wrongs and try to force him to forgive her anyway is a HUGE turnoff for me too. So it ends up feeling cheap when the resolution comes primarily due to using the ML's fear and love for her to be the catalyst for their reconciliation.

Also let me clarify here that I was extremely frustrated with the writing surrounding her departure in the last 2 episodes. Everyone kept focusing on her returning to Shanghai being the right thing for her to do and that the ML should be understanding and accepting and EVERYONE kept downplaying that her leaving wasn't what he was angry about but THE WAY she left and her lack of consideration towards (or respect for) him when she did. He had every right to break up with her for that shit! Before she even pushed ahead with the engagement she already knew she was leaving and should have sat him down and talked it all out then, not gone and have all the celebrations and what not, saying not a single word, then WAITING UNTIL SHE WAS AT THE TRAIN STATION to let him know she was leaving indefinitely! She completely let him build up this picture of this path they were headed on together, knowing she was leading him on, and didn't say a thing! DESPITE him always making it clear that he understood she NEEDED to go back. He was even trying to help her come up with a solution together! It was the most selfish, inconsiderate and disrespectful way to handle the situation with a man in his damn 30s! He wasn't a high school kid or someone in college. He was a grown man who has shown more than once that he was willing to accept all the challenges. What he couldn't accept was her lack of regard for him - rightfully so!!!

It's like she fucks up royally, says oops forgive me, he rightfully tries to walk away from her because of her lack of remorse, understanding or acknowledgement for what she's done wrong which shows a deep lack of respect or regard for him and his feelings, but then he ignores all of those relationship red flags to reconcile with her anyway because he loves her. In the end she learns nothing and that sets up for a very unhealthy relationship in the long run.

So, I'm not at all happy with the way the writers handled each reconciliation. Not at all. In fact, I find the way the ROMANCE in this drama was written to be very immature. Had they been a lot younger I would have understood it but these are two adults in their 30s.

EDIT: I watched the rest of the final episode and I'm glad to see that they do have an honest and sincere conversation where the ML helps the FL see the mistakes she'd made in how she handled their relationship. I think it's ridiculous that a grown ass woman has to be taught in the manner she had to but I'm just glad the drama at least addressed things properly.

I'm also glad they did NOT use the near death experience as the catalyst for their reconciliation. The way episode 20 ended was misleading.

Contrary to popular opinion (it seems) I do NOT like the way the ROMANCE is written in this drama. It first rubbed me wrong somewhere around ep 15 I think it was but then episodes 19 and 20 just solidified it for me.

I think other aspects of the story are told extremely well and was very impressed with the writing otherwise.

The ACTING and overall production quality is absolutely splendid! Fantastic!

The romantic interactions between our main couple are sweet too. BUT. The overall dynamic between our main couple I don't like, not at all.

Her returning to Shanghai isn't the problem. Her completely disrespectful, selfish and insensitive way of handling the return was what she did wrong. I know they'll end up together in the end but she deserved to lose him.

HOLY SHIT! She waits until she's AT THE TRAIN STATION to tell him?!?! WTF???!!! He literally thought he was there to pick someone up with her! I'm disgusted!

Wow. Just WOW! They way she put off telling about returning to Shanghai, even going so far as getting engaged and having celebrations and STILL not saying anything, to then knowing she was down to her last day and STILL not saying anything. She is a whole new level of selfish. I don't care how they'll come back and redeem her in the story. The ML deserves better than her. I'd be happy if they didn't end up together. That's a whole future of her selfish behavior waiting for him. She's shown this more than once now.

I DO also like that they have the FL explain why returning to Shanghai to continue her work was so important to her and that there was a reason other than proving herself. The work she did had meaning to her because of her disability. She felt she could help improve the lives of others and play a part in promoting technological advances domestically with the work she did. So I get why she wouldn't want to just give that up. However, I don't believe she couldn't eventually find ways to do the same thing from her hometown. Her hometown seemed to have programs that would provide startup support if she wanted to bring that type of opportunity there. If in the long-term she had a plan to move back and make a difference there too AND start her family with the ML then that should be optimal. I'm looking forward to seeing how this plays out.

I'm on ep 18 now and I must say I REALLY like the way they showed the mother change and grow but also helped us understand the reason she was the way she was with her kids in the first place all along. Like I said before I knew she clearly loved her kids and wanted what was best for them but the way she did things at times was so cruel! However she's now become one of my favorite characters

I like her even more than I like the FL at this point if I'm being honest. I got turned off by the FL along the way there and just haven't been able to get back the warm and fuzzies for her since.

Okay seriously. The FL's best friend is even just as direct and firm with the mother! WOW! She's a gd rockstar! I LOVE HER!

I'm on ep 16 and it finally hit me that the FL is very spoiled. VERY spoiled. She just expects the ML to forgive her despite treating him so badly and then lets everyone he's the one treating her badly because he's ignoring her even though she's already apologized. The only one who set her straight was her best friend, because she listened to the whole story and called her ass out when she realized what she'd said and done to the ML for him to behave the way he was. Everyone else though, she's letting them think he's just acting up towards her unjustly. Like she's not the one in the wrong and he has every right not to be talking to her. She just glosses over how poorly she's treated him. Ugh!

BUT I'm glad they finally had an honest conversation and she properly apologized and explained herself. I don't really like her as much anymore but it's meh. Whatever.

I totally see where you're coming from. You explain yourself well.
There are things I still see differently - like my reason for saying the handicap could have been anything, for example - but as you say, that's perfectly alright. I think the biggest difference honestly is in what we were/are each hoping for from the drama, which makes sense. Not everyone wants the same things.

I love when people share their views in the manner you've done here though. I felt comfortable expressing mine as well, despite our differences. You've put some ideas in mind that I wouldn't have considered otherwise - adding to the experience. THIS is what I wish there could be more of on MDL. Open-minded conversation!

Got it. No worries.

I can ignore a lot of aspects of the FL's character but her way of apologizing in episode 16 is flat out disgusting. It's completely insincere and demeaning. She literally says she's already lowered her voice apologized so stop making a fuss about nothing...SERIOUSLY?!!! HOW TF IS THAT A SINCERE APOLOGY?! That straight up pissed me off. He shouldn't have given her the time of day. His tolerating that shows a total lack of self-respect. There's nothing cute or endearing about her behavior, especially with the severity of what she did. Seducing a man you're in a relationship with then stopping midway and accusing him of forcing you?! That's a crazy level of low, yet THAT is the apology she gives and he's giving her the time of day? Nope. I couldn't even finish watching the scene before I had to come on here to rant! Nope. Uh uh. I'm calling it a night. I'll watch this shit tomorrow when I've calmed down.

Also her best friend is amazing. It's the best I've seen someone call a friend out completely on her bullshit after the way she treated the ML in ep 15., but still do so in a supportive and loving way. She was direct and firm and RIGHT! Perfect.

I think the other person was looking for a different type of story and/or missed the point of this one. I don't think they even realized the impact the death of the 2 dads had on the FL's decision making process, or even why it was so important for her to prove herself in Shanghai. Her handicap could have been anything, that wasn't the point.

The more I've read their comments the more I feel like they didn't understand the drama itself or the actual story it was trying to tell. This was all about what drove the leads' decisions - fear, guilt, insecurities. It's about accepting themselves as they are and each other as they are. I haven't even finished it yet and I see that.

Yes, it may end up letting me down in the end (I'm only on ep 15 now) but I get what they're trying to convey.

The drama also explained how he ended up in the profession. Did you not see that either? The whole part about meeting his master after his best friend died. The impact that had on him and what he learned from him. Your earlier post says they didn't cover that but they did.

I think you're looking for a lot more depth into details than they were going for. That's how you end up with 30 + episodes in a cdrama that just drags on because they spend more time developing the surrounding story and not sticking to the point of the story. Then everyone complains about how the drama gets draggy, because not enough is happening to move the story itself along.

I'm not saying you're wrong for wanting those things. I'm just saying it's difficult for drama writers and directors to find the perfect balance for everyone. They may have originally included all of those more in-depth details you're looking for but edited them out for the sake of telling a more concise story. They have to pick what they want to focus on.

Also, I want to point out that I think the drama chose not to focus on the details of her handicap and how they affected her daily life because that wasn't the point of the story. It was about how being handicapped affected her way of thinking and her mentality in her decision-making and the way she lived her life. It was about how both she herself and her mother put this burden on her to prove her self-worth despite being handicapped. That it could only be accomplished by making it big in the big city. Like living a simple life would be a cop-out. It's also about how losing both her dads to death made her unwilling to set aside her goals - even as she started realizing she had nothing to prove and was good enough as she was, handicapped and all - to be with the man she loved was too great of a risk for her to take. She made it clear that she didn't want to regret putting her goals aside to be with him. It wasn't because he was trying to coerce her to do that either. It's because she feared that he would die and leave her behind too and in the end she'd have nothing - no him and no successful life in Shanghai.

So if you put it in the context of the story they're actually trying to tell, delving further into the details of her handicap and how affected her daily life or spending more time explaining his mindset of selecting that career, would actually lead to a digression from the entire point of the story. The story wasn't about living with handicap in the way you're thinking about it. She could have had a less restrictive handicap and the story would have been the same. Thanks to her mom (as we saw from how psychotic she behaved when she found out they were dating and that she might give everything up to stay with a normal guy from her hometown like him) all of her self-worth was tied to living and being successful in Shanghai. Doing that, despite her handicap, would finally mean she was worth it. She already started showing growth when she told off the narcissistic "ex" of hers because she'd finally started realizing her own worth - handicap and all. She stayed in that "relationship" with that man for years because of how messed up in the head she was over being handicapped.

Do you get what I mean? I'm not trying to say you're wrong or anything like that. I just thought that maybe if you think of the story from another angle you might have a greater appreciation for it. In reading your comments it just feels like you missed the whole point of the story they were trying to tell. There's A LOT of depth to this story.

I was reading this too and ended up with the same questions. Were episodes skipped? The drama clearly explains how he ended up in the profession too.

The FL's brother's voice is killer.

Yup. The drama wasted no time in justifying and explaining away the mother's behavior. I'm still on ep 15 now. Lashing out at your loved ones because you're going through stuff isn't okay. Sorry. It's just not acceptable.

TO CLARIFY! I'M ABSOLUTELY LOVING THIS DRAMA! I just needed to vent about the mom and get that shit off my chest. I tolerated her this long without letting it get to me but she kept getting worse so I finally needed to let loose. I'm all good now. LOL!