I'm not really interested in having a conversation about whether cheating is right or wrong, we all have feelings about this.
I want to talk about how Kim Jun was treated in this drama.
No one in this drama was nice to him ever - even his lover. he asks what he means to her and she goes on about crawling through mud to bring them to the place where they can be together, but never does she call him just to say that she'll be late, and never does she explain her disregard for him properly. Clearly she was just using him for an excuse to shake up her life, but for crying out loud, she can't ever be nice. This poor guy is alone in the world and no one treats him like he's worth anything. My heart breaks for him.
I also want to talk about her husband. What an ass! He's a horrible person who arbitrarily decides on things for people without discussing things at all and ignores everyone in his life until everything is in total chaos. I totally would have left him for the carpenter too.
Does anyone else feel like this or is it just me?
Going into watching this drama I did not like the actor Lee Soo Hyuk one bit. I'd seen him in High School King of Savvy and Scholar who walks the night, but by the middle of this drama I loved him and I think I'd watch him in anything now
As someone who has given this drama A LOT of thought, i understand where you are coming from, and up to a certain point i understand your point of view, but i disagree.
Nobody was nice to him you say. Hm, well you are right, but i can't take his side. We certainly can't call him an angel now, can we? Firstly how did he treat Il Ri when he tried to kick her out of his house/work place. She had a panic attack because of him. Also let's not forget the fact that he knew Hee Tae was her husband but he went and became friends with him. Completely immoral for me, but still i didn't hate him. What made me actually dislike him was the fact that during the later episodes he became very pushy and dogmatic. Who gave him the permission to barge in another man's house drunk (!) and demand things? How dare he? Unacceptable, i don't care if he was hurting, all of them were! Also the fact that he, during the later episodes again, decided that he needed to be with her and put her in his car and drive away for them to be happy... Is this right? For me it's not. Who exactly does he think he is? Making decisions for everyone without their concent, this was not just his life. Did he ask her? He thought it was best for her, but he isn't her father not even her dad. He shouldn't have been like this.
For better or worse he got inside a married couple, who's fault is that is not important here, he should have made his intentions clear and then step back and let Il Ri decide what she wants to do. It was really never about what he or hee tae wanted, it was about her. I understand him, completely, Il Ri was the first woman ever to show care for him, and he loved her, deeply. His mommy issues touched me thoroughy, but his ways, were wrong. Make yourself available, show her that you want to help and you care, but take a step back and let her figure out what she wants. The fact that you want to make her happy doesn't mean you will or you really can.
Also about Hee Tae, again we disagree. He was my favourite character and i would have reacted the same way he did. I am not saying he was in the right of course. He was absent from his wife's life. He loved her, i think that was obvious, he cared, he really did, he asked Il Ri if taking care of Hye Soo was too much for her but she said she was happy doing it, and he stayed at that. His wife was unhappy and he failed to realise that, which is sad but up to a certain point Il Ri herself, wasn't even aware that she was unhappy. Kim Jun saw it, and made her realise it.
You said he decides things without asking. Well, i cannot judge him for that. I put myself in his shoes.
1. Someone has been sending me anonymous texts saying my wife did something (= i'm publicaly humimiliated)
2. I realise my wife, that i love, has been cheating on me while i did nothing wrong (in my mind). How do i react to that? I talk? Is talking really the first thing people do in such situations? It should be, i agree, but i would have cried, and screamed, and yelled, or even worse! If she had problems with our marriage why didn't she talk first? Do i need to confront her for cheating? Why do i need to be the bigger person when she did wrong? Kick her out of my house would have been my decision too.
3. I would also want to show her what it feels like to be cheated on. Il Ri said she didn't want a divorce. Why should i accept her back? "I love you both" I COMPLETELY understand her, but looking it from hee tae's side, he must have been outraged and completely heartbroken. Why isn't he enough for her? Why didn't she tell him? Of course i'd pay her back the same way.
4. But when he saw that video on his phone with his sister and his wife, he got it. He understood, he saw everything from her point of you. How can you hate a person who does that? Now he wants her back, he realised his mistake! He understands her and he wants a 2nd chance.
Hee Tae is a flawed person, and should have been more actively in his wife's life. He took her and everything for granted, that is what i blame him for, but he is not a bad person. Noone in this drama is a bad person really. Everyone tried to cope with a difficult and nerve-wrecking situation. Yes everything was chaos at some point, but in such situations the only way you can go upwards is when you have lost everything completely and have hit rock bottom.
You said you would have chosen the carpenter. Completely understandable. Possibly almost everyone would have, but this was not about who is better for her. It was about who she really loves. She loved Jun, yes, possibly he was the biggest love of her life, but he was not her soulmate. Her soulmate was Hee Tae. She loved Hee Tae, she never stopped, she waited for him for 7 years! Their life got complicated because of Hye Soo that's it. She lost herself in his family's drama. Jun was just a window for her to be happy and free again. She loved the feeling of youth she had with him, she loved that she could be careless around him, but was she over her husband? No. If she could be like that with her husband again would she choose him? Yes. When she was on the brink of losing him she chose him. When she was in the hospital she saw him. It was him from the beginning. I am not saying she loved Jun less, and maybe if jun had came first in her life things might have been different.
I also don't think she wasn't nice to him, he was very pushy about his needs. His heart was in the right place but his handling of situations was wrong.
You said he went through mud to bring them to a place they can be together. Yes he did, but did he ever ask her, or gave her space to decide who and what she wants? He didn't. She loved him, yes, but love isn't enough. She needed time, he should have thought more about her needs than his own. You can't take such decisions rushly. Il Ri wasn't such a person. She was unhappy, but she didn't hate her life. She wanted to take care of Hee Soo, she loved Hee Tae's parents, she liked all that, it was just too much at some point, she lost herself and she payed the price.
Again this is just my own way of seeing this drama and characters
I only felt sorry for the husband in this drama. I also think he was a fool for taking back his wife because I never truly believed that she loved him. She was treating him as if he had wronged her, when she wronged him on so many levels in my opinion.
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