Taking into account when it was made, it's phenomenal and ahead of its time
ADVICE: If you can step back and put yourself in 2007, this Drama was a big deal for the time and is quite beautiful. I only watched it for the first time this last year, but I made sure to not judge the script and story based on today's values. That said, watching it through the lens of today, I can understand why some people have a big problem with the premise and the female main character's actions. In a time when being gay almost anywhere in the world wasn't only dangerous but also stigmatized and perhaps even classified as a mental illness, the journey of the ML is a fascinating one, and an important one. I think, for me, it allowed me to understand why so many non-straight people really struggle with their sexuality.But, obviously, the FML isn't a man, thus the story's direction and conflict change direction and become about her duplicity, which is fine / makes sense, but it splits the drama into two different shows. For me, this change without real resolution for Choi Han Gyul's first / internal conflict felt like a bit of a letdown, if I'm honest. Looking at the show through the lens of today, I wished the show would've explored Choi Han Gyul's realization that romantic love (for him) isn't limited by gender. He fell in love with the person first, not their gender. Admittedly, the show draws this conclusion without stating it explicitly, but I think it moved on too fast. Which is fine, I guess. But I wanted the ML and FL to have the conversation, "I fell in love with you. And I would love you if you were a man or a woman or non-binary, because it's you." That would've been a powerful message for people to see and hear and be exposed to.
I also have to call out Gong Yoo and the way he *looks at* his FML in his dramas once the character is in love with them. Cheese and crackers, this guy and his looks. I don't know how he does it, but it's like something within him flips a switch and, when he gazes at the FML's character, it's all heat and desire. How does he do that?
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Delightful drama, lead chemistry unmatched
The first romance kdrama I watched and it set the bar high. Despite it's age, the dorky y2k hairstyles, and low production value, it is 100% worth experiencing the amazing storyline and acting. Everything feels more natural and the story can be experienced more authentically without the fancy VFX of our times used to overcompensate for bland writing.I was honestly iffy during the first half of the season because it does drag (hence the 9 rating). And some of the characters behave in ways that are... very frustrating. Relationships between them are various types of toxic. But there is payoff – thankfully their arcs are written well enough so that their journeys of self-reflection ultimately remedy this to an extent (for a piece of lighthearted fiction, at least). The character development for the ML esp is well done – slowly transforming from insufferable, toxic, hot-tempered asshole to someone who is more empathetic and understanding. Together the leads are adorable, endearing and the chemistry is genuine and incredible. But it does take a while to get there.
Supporting cast is also great. The second leads have a more complex and confusing storyline that slows the pace of the drama, but they present an interesting contrast to the struggles of Eun Chan as well as some commentary on society's evolving gender dynamics/expectations of the time. The princes are annoying at times but also hilarious. Surprisingly I was quite emotionally invested in all of them by the end. I do wish they gave us a longer epilogue.
Since watching Coffee Prince, I haven't found a romance since that hits the same way. Sigh I guess they don't make them like this anymore
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Nice conflicts
Nice conflicts.In terms of the sincerity of YJ's half uttered apology, one thing that I would very much like to know is whether it was meant for leaving him, or for lying to his face for more than a year and seeing DK behind his back. Was the the one that confessed it, or did he discover it on his own? I must say that if she asked him to take her back without telling him it would be pretty damning, in terms of deprieving him of the ability to make an informed decision.
Another aspect, of course, is why is she back now. She didn't call for two years, and now she is back and only now utters the apology. If she and DK had not broken up, would she have gone to HS and apologized? So her feeling sorry and apologizing depends on the success of her relationship with DK? Or did she decide that she was in love with HS and broke up with DK because of that (or did DK cheat with the underwear model?)? And if she was not in love with HS, does that mean that she shouldn't come clean to him about the betrayal, or not apologize? Not that we know what happened. And does she regret the cheating? Or following DK to NY? She still says she run off with him because she was in love with him. Does she regret it now? Both or just the lying for more than one year part? And would she regret it had things worked out between her and DK?
All this makes it pretty difficult to gauge what she is feeling sorry for, exactly, and the fact that she is apologizing now that they have broken up, but didn't bother to say a word to HS for two whole years does make it pretty difficult to understand the sincerity and value of the half uttered apology. Her subsequent behaviour, even with respect to DK, does further call into question her feelings on the matter, because would someone that genuinely feels guilt about what they did to HS really diminish and mock his insecurities, or use DK to make HS jealous and threaten to leave him for DK again, or brush aside the pain of HS knowing about her seeing DK behind his back for more than a year, or throw in his face the fact that she left him because she loved DK and followed her heart, and he couldn't stop her even by begging, just like he couldn't stop her now, or make lights of her betrayal and HS's feelings towards DK with that horrible joke scene at the end, where he was forced to play along in half disbelief, which reminded me of the "jokes" they made around his attraction to FL?
In short, what is she sorry for, and would she be making this apology if she was still with DK? She didn't talk to HS in two years while they were together, after all. Not feeling sorry and/or not feeling the need to apologize until things were going well? Or to say a word to him for two years? Only discovering she felt sorry and wanted to apologize now that she wants a to rekindle the relationship with HS, and not even leading with that, not touching upon the topic after the half uttered apology when he had already let his in the house? A sincere apology would have related to her lack of honesty (and she would have come clean about it certainly before asking HS to take her back, not that I am asserting she did not as we are not told), and would have been independent from whether things with DK went well or she wanted to be with HS again, and it should have probably happened two years ago, not now that she and DK have broken up and she wants to get back with HS. I mean, no to appear too skeptical of her sincerity, because we know very little about the circumstances (and I wish the should would have elaborated) and we don't even know why she broke up with DK (maybe because she felt she wanted HS instead? And contrary to what she did to HS, she didn't want to deceive DK for some reason, so he extended him a courtesy she didn't extend to HS for more than a year?), but her not saying a word to HS and then coming back with a half uttered apology two years later when she wants him back does seem more than a little self serving.
Frankly, I felt the same way I felt with the wife in My Mister... where basically the apology happened only when things with her lover didn't pan out and she learned that DH had discovered her betrayal. Had none of those things happened, there would have been no regret/apology. Same thing for This Week My Wife Is having an Affair's case, honestly, where it felt perfunctory and too little too late. They felt similarly self serving.
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Nice show
Nice show.With YJ, the bizzarre thing is that I had more questions about her behavior and doubts about the sincerity and timing of her apology that apparently HS had, given that he called her out on very little of it, and even then dropped the matter afterwards. On one hand, the claim that she is sorry and loves him, on the other hand, the timing of the apology (now that she has broken up with DK and wants to get back to HS after not a word for two years... had things gone different with DK would HS never heard from her again? No apology or anything of the sort?
Seems a little suspicious in terms of the timing that she would suddenly discover she feels enough regret that she wants to apologize, right after she and DK broke up and she wants to get back with HS. But the irritating thing is that we are not given critical information such as whether she did leave DK because she was in love with HS. But then again, this is a different question from her feeling the need to apologize to HS... I would have feeling guilt eat away at me in an intolerable manner if I had deceived my partner of almost ten years that I know loves me completely, it wouldn't have come two years later (it's even unclear whether she knew he was aware of the more than year long deception when she asked him to take her back, and if she knew he was not it would be frankly an appalling information to withhold, but again, maybe she didn't hide it from him, we are simply not told).
I mean, not a word in two years, and suddenly she is both apologizing and asking to get back together? What is going on? Is she feeling sorry because she wants HS back, and wouldn't have felt the need to apologize otherwise? She apparently didn't provide such an apology, nor any other word, while she was in NY with her lover for the past two years. It does all seem rather self serving and all too convenient, and in HS's case I would have more than a little trust issue and question for her. Not that the show provides much information for one to form a complete picture (we hear about a certain underwear model when she talks to DK and he asks about the musician, but it's not clear if it was DK's rebound after they broke up, we don't know why they broke up, specifically who broke up with who, though DK apparently has feelings for her and she does not for him, but apparently loves HS and want to get back to him instead, while HS's cousin basically puts it in a way that makes it seem like she has broken up with DK explicitly to get back with HS... but then again, apologizing for lying to HS for more than a year is something that should have been done years ago, and should have been independent from the question of whether she loved him or not, yet it's not even clear whether she knew HS knew, or whether she even come clean about the more than year long deception, though we know that he had discovered it was going on in the more than one year where she was seeing DK behind his back, so HS had discovered it beforehand in any case, at a time where she was still convinced she was successfully fooling him when she lied to his face every day... though I must say, the way she brushes that aside when he agonizingly brings it up does undercut her half uttered apology from the first episodes... again, as a viewer I was second guessing her more than HS did, and had far more question about the whole situation).
One horrific thing about the situation is that HS basically didn't hear a word from her for two years, and yet had to routinely hear about her romantic life with the guy she had been seeing behind his back for more than one year, before running off with said guy to NY, from the press. She is a celebrity, it's unavoidable.
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Nice work
Overall, a nice dramaWith 2nd lead storyline, one thing I wish they had focused more on was the bombshell dropped on the side of the streets on the way to the airport that HS knew and put up with YJ seeing DK behind his back for more than a year before running off with him. This to me changes things considerably, and I really, really wished that they had discussed the issue further.
To be honest, if she had only dumpted him, while painful, it would have probably been the best option had she decided that she didn't love him anymore and she loved someone else. It would have meant she had been honest and upfront, and the feel I got up until that point was flirty/sassy but fundamentally honest.
I tend to be the opposite of jealous and so I would not be disturbed in the abstract by the flirting or meeting the ex, even on-on-one, in the general case it could be a sign of the strength of their trust and the honesty in the relationhsip. However, context does matter, and if you add the fact that she had dumped him all of a sudden and not seen him for two years, things get a little creepier. If you then add the fact that she run away with said ex, and that he still has feelings for her (and, might I add, gets touchy/feely/pretty intimate -she allows him to pat her on the head, etc., puts up with his flirting and only cleverly shoots back, doesn't set up clear boundaries... this is more disturbing than allowing teh cousing to rest his head on her shoulder or lap, because the cousin never came between her and her bf, while DK did-). There is also the fact that even if she had not cheated, HS basically saw her walk out of the door without a second word, and then come back two years later, so he would have some trust issue/insecurity regardless, so it does seem inappropriate and insensitive, particularly when she is supposed to rebuild said trust (if at all possible, which is not a given).
But the fact that she actually lied to his face for more than a year before running off with her lover changes everything. In light of that, her behaviour is completely insane, the baseline of trust is very much not there, because she broke said trust, and "inappropriate" does not even begin to cover it -DK is not only the person that she run off with, but the person that she was with behind HS's back while telling the latter she was working. That's a completely different thing that dumping. Dumping essentially means being honest and upfront about her feelings and telling him he doesn't want to be together anymore, and it's the opposite of cheating (I find the notion of thought crime ludicrous, and think that everyone is allowed their fantasies, see non-jealous part above... but on the thought crime part I am dead serious: you cannot control your feelings for someone, if you don't love a person anymore and love someone else, the only two options are backstabbing your partner or leaving them, and as unpleasant as it is, at least it's honest and respectful -you treat them with dignity rather than humiliating them and treating them like a fool, or putting your own convenience ahead of basic respect and honesty in a completely self serving manner-). It's the respectful and decent thing to do. Lying to HS's face for more than a year is something else entirely.
The way she reacted to a little one-sided mini-crush with a one-sided small kiss makes the whole thing even more absurd: he is taken to task for his feelings (not really for the kiss), which frankly approaches the "thought crime" part, and the context very much matters: she might have a leg to stand on if she had not lied to his face for more than a year and then run off with another man, but he lived through that and forgave her, and she almost runs off with her lover over something so comparatively insignificant, giving the excuse that the standard is that he never even drank coffee with another girl. So, because he is much more trustworthy and honest as a baseline, it doesn't matter that he was willing to wait for her (for years), and forgive her more than one year long deception, while she cheated on him for more than one year, run off with DK for two years, and she finds no issue with her flirting and having this ambiguous relationship with the man she cheated on HS with, when she should instead be trying to restore the trust she broke, and therefore doing the exact opposite? Talk about a double standard.
I find it disturbing that she talks about being hurt and humiliated by him merely liking another girl -who doesn't like him back and is therefore no threat- for a very brief time, but does not acknowledge in any way, shape or form that what she herself did was about a billion times worst. What, since she is the type of person to cheat on her boyfriend and run off with another guy, then it's not a problem for her to flirt and indulge/lead on his cousin and DK, who she had cheated on her bf with, because it's a lower level of expectations, and her bf is used to her being fickley, while she is used to him having ever been in love with her and her alone? It seems insane, if there is someone that should take action to restore trust, and try to be mindful and understanding of any discomfort and insecurity her partner would rightly have while trying to heal and rebuild trust after her horrific betrayal, it would be her (that would include stopping with the flirting and not indulging the peopele that have feelings for her, setting clear boundaries, particularly with DK who she had an affair with for more than a year and run off with for two).
I mean, aside from basic morality, this is just practical. Again, no issue in principle with flirting or talking on the phone/spending time with ex-es, even one on one. If said ex is someone that you cheated on your partner with for more than a year, and then run off for two, and you are trying to get your partner to trust you again (and in any case you don't want to hurt them), than maybe phone calls and one-to-one meetings or lunches where you tease/flirt and you indulge them and make clever come-backs rather than set clear boundaries and tell them that this behaviour is not acceptable would be just practical. There simply isn't the necessary trust with her current partner for him to be okay, and confident that she would respect the boundaries and not backstab him, because in the past she didn't respect such boundaries and lied to his face for more than a year. Trust needs to be built up, and teasing, being flippant, jockingly asking about his opinion of her involvement with DK... if you need to ask, with DK as with her cousin, then you already know the answer. If he acts as if he is okay and he is not, then probably ask yourself why he doesn't feel confortable sharing that he is not okay, and realize that mocking his concerns is literally insane when he has every reason in the world to be concerned: her cheating with DK is not paranoia, it's something that actually happened after they had been together for almost a decade, and went on for more than a year.
She doesn't take his concerns seriously and doesn't seem interested in rebuilding trust (assuming that it's even possible, though the show basically doesn't make a big deal about it and sweeps the issue under the rug, completely unrealistically in my opinion... I mean, the mild unease of someone that had been dumped when she run off with another man is one thing, and is probably bigger than what he demonstrated in terms of insecurity, but here we are talking about her having a more than year long affair before running off with the guy without another word... this ought to have been much more of an issue, and it was mentioned, in much more muted tones, and then dropped).
This is a problem. She was lucky enought that HS waited for her and forgave her and took her back, the least she could do would be actually care about what HS thinks. If it's a concern, it deserves to be discussed and addressed seriously, not mocked. He needs to be comfortable sharing his fears and insecurities, while being given the safety to know that, even without agreeing, she would at least take his perspective and his concerns seriously. Instead they are made light of, and he puts up with the mocking tone. But it's not a jocking matter that should be treated flippantly. It's serious. And in this case, it's not paranoia, or him doubting a trustworthy person. It's something that actually did happen, and it's him dealing with someone that had already broken his trust by lying to his face for more than a year.
I was disappointed in not seeing them discuss her feelings for DK, his feelings for HS himself at the time and now, why she did what she did, why she changed her mind, and honestly discussing boundaries and what he is comfortable with (and if he tries to play it cool but it's obvious to everyone that he is not unaffected, and she sees it clearly, otherwise she wouldn't have asked, not to mention she used the still infatuated DK, who she had cheated on her bf with, to make her bf jealous... she clearly knows he doesn't like the guy and for good reason, even if he shakes his hand and acts as if he is not bothered... she knows all this, she just doesn't care, and she very much should, if she wants to rebuild trust... all the while asking *him* to not get too attached to FL -prescient words, but here it's not her that had been given any reason to fear she couldn't trust him-... again, my perspective on this is that give the context, it's perfectly fine to pay someone back with their own coin, and if you didn't show any honesty, loyalty and respect to someone, you are not entitled to any in return -for the same reason, I was perfectly fine with, say, the betrayed wife in A Good Lawyer's Wife cheating on her husband... and I actually did wish that things would have developed into a more serious triangle for the sake of the drama, but it instead turned into a one-sided mini-crush with a small kiss she didn't reciprocate... again, the premise being that he put up with her betrayal for more than a year, and then she run off with another man without a word for two years, so a one sided mini crush and small unreciprocated kiss are really so insignificant by comparison that anyone in her position, or anyone sane with any sense of perspective, really, should feel ashamed to even mention it in the same sentence... and I am saying she would have deserved it if a more serious affair happened? Yes, yes I am very much saying exactly that -she has no leg to stand on- and no, it wouldn't have been the same thing, because, again, someone that didn't show any loyalty, respect and honesty is not entitled to any in return: she cheated on someone that thought her incapable of anything of the sort, and that never even drunk coffee with another girl and was fully focused on her, while he would have cheated on someone that deceived him for more than a year, run off without another word with her lover despite his begging, and two years later came back fully expecting that he would be still waiting for her and entirely focused on her, telling him that things didn't pan out with the man she had cheated on him with for more than a year and run off to live with for two, and that she now wants to be with him again -the old pair of shoes she dropped on the side that she assumed, unfortunately correctly, she would find in the same place and still waiting for her-, and that didn't do a single thing to rebuild his broken trust, or in any way care to set boundaries, if not with his cousin, who was not a threat, at least with the ex she cheated with an who is still infatuated with her... if the question is "don't you trust me?", the answer is unfortunately that he has no reason to, and every reason not to).
That's the thing, she dares to talk about not trusting anymore, but it's him that has been given no reason to trust her, and there is simply no proportions (you can say that pushing someone after they shoved you is violence and punching people in the face at random in the street -aka the knockout game-, or shooting up a school, are also violence, but then you lose all sense of proportions... plus, again, 100% in support of the betrayed wife in The Magicians sleeping with another man: turnabout is fair play, if you dish it out, you should be able to take it, if you don't want there to be s**t, don't start s**t). The fact, given the context, is that she is not owed any trust, and apparently doesn't seem to care about reassuring him in the slightest, treating the question in a joking and flippant manner, which would have been appropriate had she been honest with him and not given him a reason to not trust her, but given that she had completely betrayed the trust he had put in her, her mocking or minimizing his concerns and dislike of DK, for example, is really gaslighting.
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Strong show
Nice show.Regarding YJ's apology, I really would have liked some clarification on two points:
1. Did she come clean about her more than year long deception to HS before running off with YH (who anyway knew about it while it was going on)? Did she apologize for that part at the time (i.e. not as part of the half uttered apology she said to him when he took her back? Because that's definitely a part that pertains to lack of honesty and respect and that she should have felt sorry and apologized for irrespective of whether she wanted to continue staying with HS. It's something the he absolutely should have been made aware of prior to any conversation about taking her back, in order to make an informed decision. I am not sure whether she knew he knew (hopefully if she didn't she told him at some point prior to the moment where she asked him to take her back). Again, this is something she should have apologized for two years ago, independently of whether she wanted to be with him or not. Not saying that she didn't, not saying that she did, but this would have been the best scenario in that situation given that it would have come at a non suspicious timing and would seem more genuine and less self serving.
2. Was the apology after he took her back including the bit about the more than year long deception, or was it about running off with her lover and not saying a word to HS for two years? In any case, I must say that the fact it arrives now, after two years of complete silence where she apparently didn't feel any need to do this, when she broke up with DK and wants HS to take her back, does make it feel less genuine than if it came at a less convenient (for her) timing and with no strings attached (i.e. while she was trying to convince him to take her back.
All in all, I do perceive in her a rather self serving streak that makes me wonder if the second one would have come at all had things gone differently with DK, as for the first one, I don't even know if it was made or if she came clean about the deception that HS already knew about (not asserting that it wasn't and she didn't), and if it did whether it happened at the time or now that she wants him back... we don't know anything, so it's hard to judge exactly what I am seeing. But I do get the suspicious that HS would have never heard from her again, like he didn't in the past two years, if things had gone differently with DK (but we don't know). But maybe things went differently with DK exactly because she decided she was in love with HS and not DK (HS's cousin seemed to imply that she left DK for him, and she seemed to be in love with HS and not DK, but as to what prompted this change of heart, we are left in the dark... she mentions a model, but it's unclear if it's DK's rebound... again, we know nothing). The thing is, her apology shouldn't really depend on whether she wants to be with HS or not. I think that it's reasonable to separate the pieces, and maybe when she loved DK and not HS and left with the former she didn't regret it, but she does not because she is no longer in love with DK but with HS instead... it would have been an interesting question to ask, because she still refers to it as "love" and says she "followed her heart" when she dumped HS for DK (and indeed if she fell out of love with HS and in love with DK there is nothing wrong with telling HS that and breaking up, what's wrong is the more than year long deception that is an entirely separate matter, and that she should feel sorry and apologize for irrespective of how things ended up with DK and HS, and as discussed above hopefully do so years ago, not now that she wants HS back.
The whole point being, I guess, that we don't have the information to get a clean picture, these are just some random thoughts on the matter and how I would feel about various scenarios and how self serving some scenarios could be compared to others.
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Worth watching
Nice show.I must say that YJ's behavior seemed more and more self serving the more one focuses on it, and I found myself wondering about her motivations and the very convenient and self serving timing of her apology after two years of silence, and wondering about alternative scenarios where she continued to not speak to HS because she didn't break up with DK, then reasoning that really, her feeling sorry for her behavior and apologizing for it shouldn't depend on her relationship status and the fact she now doesn't love DK and loves HS, then reasoning that we don't know what she told him two years ago, whether she confessed and apologized for her more than year long deception, or not, whether she is now apologizing for that or for leaving and not speaking with him for two years and now coming back to ask him to take her back, despite the more than year long deception where she was seeing DK behind his back, etc. So, timing is suspicious, what-if scenarios where she doesn't break up with DK are not encouraging in terms of whether regret and apology would have been forthcoming, but we cannot say anything definitive, and it's unclear whether she broke up with DK because she wanted to be with HS since now she doesn't love the former anymore and loves the latter -and HS's cousin seemed to imply that she broke up to be with him, though we don't know the circumstances, and it's unclear whether the model mentioned just once was a rebound, though we know DK is apparently still smitten with YJ and she is not shy about bringing up someone's cheating... but it's not clear whether that's what her comment meant, or whether the model was a rebound and she mentioned it because he asked about the musician, i.e. HS-. I really, really would have liked more detail on the motivations here, because how I feel about how self serving this all is depends a lot on it. The fact that the apology comes after her and DK broke up and she is trying to get HS to take her back after not talking with him for two years does seem self serving, but as I said we don't know how much she revealed about the more than year long deception and how much she apologized for back in the day vs now (one hopes that at least she knew he knew of the betrayal prior to asking him to take her back, because in the scenario where she though he didn't and she still made that request without telling him, it would be rather appalling in terms of taking away his ability to make an informed decision. But, again, we don't know anything about that. But it does add to the unease, and this certainly is not conducing to rooting for the pairing... I guess that with the lack of details, one can insert a sizeable amount of cope into the mix, and imagine the less horrible scenario (which might or might not be the more likely), though certainly some aspects of her behavior are just appalling full stop and we see them with our own eyes, and no amount of self deception can change the facts. Her lying to HS for more than one year is a fact, as is her brushing his words aside when he confessed the pain he felt in that period of more than a year where he acted as if he believed her but knew she was lying about work and meeting DK behind his back, as, for that matter, is her later mocking and flippant way in which she dismissed the whole thing, after the agony he demonstrated in that outburst by the side of the road... but let's not rehash her self serving and self absorbed behavior any further. Imho it was more than appalling enough that him waiting around for two years without a word from her was frankly hard to believe, and it was a shame he only got an aborted one-sided mini-crush and he didn't get to explore fully a relationship with someone that wouldn't mistreat him the way YJ did -and I would bet anything that FL wouldn't have dreamed of taking him for granted and deceiving him for more than a year the way YJ did, which is why basically anyone, or even no one, i.e. staying single, would have imho been a better choice to pursue rather than taking her back -immediately after she asked, basically, at that-. Again, compared to anything she did she really has no leg to stand on to complain, and at least in World of the Married the betrayed wife got to have a full blown affair, though she did in the end take the scumbag back... I very much prefer A Good Lawyer's Wife where in the end she not only sleep with another man, but gives the philandering husband the finger. I would have been so much easier to root for the pairing if it was not for the more than a year of deception, that's really one little detail that changes everything and they just drop it there without bothering to elaborate... absolutely infuriating.
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Coffee Prince is a one in a lifetime type of drama.
There are many dramas out there and though I haven't reviewed any of them or even added them to my profile on here, I have watched a lot of dramas.This drama is in my top 10 list. All the characters are consistent, even when they show character growth. Most of the characters are loveable and the relationships in this show is top-tier (though I disliked the second cp, but that's just my own personal opinion). Even though I have only watched this show once so far, I can already tell this is going to be a comfort show for me. The journey of Eun Chan and Han Gyul is simply breathtaking to watch. The chemistry between the actors was something I cannot describe.
Though I wished that more people other than Ha Rim understood the mental plight that Han Gyul was going through as someone who also struggled with their sexuality, I loved the fact that everyone's reaction was essentially: You still love her and she loves you.
That's what the show is about. It's love in all forms. The princes' relationships with each other was heartwarming and the last episode when Eun Chan reunites with them had me cheesing the entire time. The relationship between parent & child, friend & friend, cousin & cousin, sibling & sibling, grand-child & grand-mother, everything was just wonderful.
I am so glad I took a chance on this show and I hope you do the same as well.
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Nice watch
Overall, I liked the drama very much.In terms of the 2nd lead couple, I thought that they should have paint more attention to the revelation that YJ was seeing DK behind HS's back for more than a year prior to running away with him, because that's pretty much a game changer. I would have had no problem with her deciding that she didn't love HS anymore and wanted to pursue something with DK, but then the least he deserved as a human being, and even more as someone that by her own admission had stayed by her side for almost a decade without even so much as getting coffee with another girl, was to be treated with a minimum of respect and honesty.
Frankly, I have seen some rather delusional takes, such as one person painting the picture of a promiscuous artistic environment, and a famous public facing artist, as opposed to her "hermit" reclusive boyfriend, attracting attention and wanting to "upgrade" the boyfriend with respect to the "old" throwaway model she had been with for so long, thus going for the rich fop instead. Now, there are plenty of tv shows where young people that have always been together decide to break up, though this "upscaling" seems utterly superficial (and she was around 27/28, not that being young means being superficial, in terms of inexperience/immaturity... in any case, they don't have anything to do with loyalty and honesty, the golden rule of treating others like you want to be treated, which is pretty universal and requires no particular wishdom of the years). But the show, while not giving precise details on what happened, clearly:
1. Does not make the artist environment out to be particularly filled with flaky, superficial, disloyal or even promiscuous people (plus this is SK there is high expectation fo public figures)
2. Does not at any point imply that she was relying on a man or going for someone more rich and successful, and the very notion is very disrespectful.
3. Makes it plain that HS also had girls going after him, he simply didn't want to partake. He was no hermit (if anything, one could say he saw more people on a daily basis that your solo painter) and *worked* in the city, the house is merely a villa on the hill, which many rich and successfull people have without being socially isolated -he has a car-.
4. Makes it plain that when she met DK she was no famous star, having just had her first lackluster exhibition.
5. She clearly states that she was in love with DK at the time, this was not her going for someone else because she was wondering what else was out there.
6. In any case, I don't think one can make generalizations about artists in the first place, particularly in a different culture like SK with certain expectations for behaviour, and we are not exactly talking about the typical male rockstar sleeping with their groupies, at least that's not how that environment was depicted in the show. It was classy and aloof. By the same token she didn't go partying hard or do drugs. And even if she was in a community where disloyalty and dishonesty were prevalent, it would say something about their behaviour, not on the morality of hurting, humiliating, deceiving one's partner, a behavior that is universally considered objectionable to say the least (again, this is separate from things like poly, etc., it's about honesty, not where to set the boundaries and whether sex or even romance with multiple people is in or out, the specific rules have to be negotiated with one's partner anyway). To be clear, if you are in an environment where theft and street violence are more common, it does not make engaging in such behavior moral.
Another insane take was the idea that having a more than year long affair and running off with her lover somehow being described behaving more like men to make her way in a (man's) world, I find the take to be an utterly insane generalization: while men are less faithful in general, not being faithful is not a defining characteristic of men, and in particular prior to her betrayal it was most definitely not a characteristic of HS, and certainly didn't help her nor anyone else make their way in the world (unless one is insinuating something like that DK only sponsored her because she slept with him, which seems insulting and the exact opposite of female empowerment). Much more respectful to say that she made her way in the world through her own talent. The only way she overturned gender roles there was proposing, which was cool, for the rest, her femininity has no impact on choosing her sexual partner (FL did it while passing as a male) or her career (surely it's insulting, not empowering, to think that she didn't get where she was through talent, or imply that DK only helped her because they were together).
Now, to tackle HS's behaviour, looking at what actually happened, they are the same thing in the same way that a paper boat and Bezos' yacht are both boats (I guess that technically they both float, but comparing them is like comparing a candle light to the Sun). HS had a small unreciprocated kiss with a girl that was not interested in him anymore. Frankly, in her place, I would be too ashamed by the sheer hypocrisy of the word about to escape my mouth to even mention words like not being able to trust, feeling pathetic, or pride, let alone mention reading a message when he was alone compared to more of a year of lying to his face in the same phrase.
Frankly, there is a long, long way to go before they can be considered to be "even". Even if he had cheated on her with another woman he fell in love with for more than a year, and then run off with her for another two without a second word, only to reappear all of a sudden two years later, expecting to find her there and ready to take him back, he still wouldn't have gotten even, because she would have done all of the above to someone that had always loved only her, after almost a decade together, and that had never even drunk a coffe with another girl, rejecting any other possible partner, on top of putting up with more than a year of her lying to his face and meeting DK in secret, and then running off for two despite his begging, only to return and dare to demand he takes her back now that she and DK have broken up... followed by a complete lack of care for his point of view or any desire or attempt to rebuild trust (if it was even possible), while he would have done all that to the very same woman that did the aforementioned cheating and running off and coming back after two years without hearing a word having the gall to ask him to take him back, without doing anything to regain his trust. Not that if she had tried for real to get his trust back it would have made any difference to what she had done to him and her complete lack of a leg to stand on and complain, in any case, just pointing out the kind of person that he would have been cheating on. In terms of karma and poetic justice, him or DK doing such a thing to her would have been something that she wouldn't have had any leg to stand on and complain about.
When she tried to threaten to leave with DK, the man she had cheated with for more than a year and run away with for two, until she showed up uninvited again, telling him that he still loved her, it should have made him more convinced to just break things off with her himself and go look for someone else. She has the gall to threaten to leave him for the guy that she had cheated with, and he is supposed to beg her to stay (which he unfortunately does)? Telling her to not let the door hit her on the a*s on the way out should have been the more appropriate response. The question is really not how he could have fallen for someone else after the hell she put him through (i.e. all it took before they could finally be together, specifically him with her... here she is probably forgetting that she was the one that went back to him after breaking up with DK, but certainly HS groveling and begging her to stay made it easy to forget that, and in any case it was basically a matter of showing up and asking, she didn't even attempt to do anything to regain his trust -doubtful whether it would have been possible in reality, but here it was all swept under the rug-), but rather how could he not have fallen for literally anyone else, or even chosen to stay single. And the hell was not finished even after getting back together, what with him being taken for granted, or the fact that the psychological and emotional trauma and suffering he went through and his understandable insecurities are ignored when not mocked, and he doesn't feel free to talk for example about how he feels regarding DK, and is mocked when he does, which he then goes along with and plays it cool, while being unable to open up and having his insecurities taken seriously, if they are not outright ignored or farcically twisted around like the pain he conveyed at being lied to for more than a year before she run off with her lover, which was completely ignored by YJ prompting the absurd question of how he could love someone else mentioned above (answer: how could he *not* love someone, anyone else, after being put through that and having her react in such a manner to his confession of utter pain? Only by not loving himself or having any self respect and self dignity left).
Talk about two weights and two measures, boundaries extremely loose for her, stricter standards for him, he has to guarantee that he will not feel anything for anyone else ever. Not talking about actions, but about straight up thought crime, like Orwell's 1984... Newflash, nobody can guarantee that, as we are in control of our actions, not of our feelings. We have thoughts and emotions, and then we have actions. The latter we control, and through reason we can orient our thoughts and judgment and evaluate our course of action: for example, if we are in an abusive relationship, we can choose to leave despite feeling attachment due to feeling from a happier past, and even come to the realization taht the person we might think we love and were convinced would have never hurt us in such a manner might exist only inside our head, and the real one does not deserve us. But you cannot choose to love someone on command. Emotions (which you feel, but are not tools of cognition), and spurious thoughts which come into your head whether you want them or not (and you can observe when you meditate, and let go), vs reasoning, vs actions. The reason the law punishes actions and not emotions and thoughts is that actions have the peculiarity, over those other two, that you can control them. You cannot choose to believe something you don't really believe simply because you want to (well, maybe there is brainwashing), and you cannot force yourself to love someone you don't. We can and should decide whether the love or attraction we feel for someone means we should pursue a relationship or not -maybe they are abusive, or they are in a relationship-. But we cannot force ourselves to, say, love someone on command, the only guarantee is to be honest and upfront with your partner and identify what the boundaries are and whether you want to carry on the relationship or pursue something with someone else.
In that respect I was repulsed and didn't agree with in the least with her minimization of ML's feelings for her when she said that he didn't love her because otherwise he would have tried to steal her from his cousin: there are other boundaries, and decent people don't try to get between two people in a relatioship, and hurt people that never did anything wrong to them -because they don't know them-, or that they care about -in this case, family-. This mentality is frankly completely self centered and self serving, and toxic, and reveals some rather ugly truths of her psychology regarding boundaries not to cross, etc. Note that when HS kissed her, FL was not with HS's cousin at the time -she was just getting infatuated, but obviously he wasn't even sure if she was really into his cousin, in fact until very recently she was into him instead, he missed by a very tight margin-. Plus, his cousin still thought the girl was a man. Otherwise I doubt HS would have considered coming between them, despite the fact that the latter routinely tried to get into his own gf's pants, so it's not as if he would have had any leg to stand on anyway. There is a point there about not trying seriously or for real, in any case walk by the river... had she reciprocated, not sure what would have happened, giving the benefit of the doubt that he would have pulled back, despite being rather inconsiderate in constantly flirting with her... I don't want to think that he shares YJ'S mentality, and wished he would have pushed back and called her out on that at any cost, including lying and deceiving other people who did not deserve it... wondering if she would be singing the same tune if she was on the receiving end for real, by someone that was determined to come between her and her boyfriend, rather than by someone that wasn't interested like FL, which was therefore not a threat-. There is also the concept of competing for the attention of the same person, versus coming between two people in an established relationship and trying to break it apart, which is what ML would have needed to have done in order to try to get YJ to leave HS.
Some quick final thoughts. Coming back to the topic of cheating, I wonder if her lover cheated with some kind of model or not (he does not mention it, she bring out a model when he asks about the musician, her bf... maybe it was just someone DK saw as a rebound after the breakup, while still pining for YJ?). Also, not to look into anyone's linen basked and go into *that* much detail, but no uncertainty about the kid's paternity? She was back for a month if I recall correctly when she slept with HG the first time. Not sure when she broke things off with DK exactly, I guessed close to the time she went back to SK.
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Iconic song by SML
Iconic song by SMLre: "Also, not to look into anyone's linen basked and go into *that* much detail, but no uncertainty about the kid's paternity? She was back for a month if I recall correctly when she slept with HG the first time. Not sure when she broke things off with DK exactly, I guessed close to the time she went back to SK. "
Maybe they used protection, after all she even planned to abort the baby thinking about the potential impact with her career, which makes it apparent that her and HS didn't use any contraceptive method (or I guess it failed, but I would go with the former)... This makes me wonder about what ifs, if she didn't come back because she was thinking about the next step, or if it was something like cheating following by her feeling insecure about DK, but it's also true that they didn't mention cheating explicitly, though she mentioned some sort of model when he asked about "the musician". Would have loved to know more about their breakup... did they ever consider a family? Iirc YJ answered she didn't plan to marry to the press (which HS read and reported when talking with their friends, and which to be honest kind of reflected her hesitancy at the end of the drama).
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