TPAM is secretly Batman
TPAM is secretly spiderman
TPAM can see through clothes xD
xD TPAM stalks Bae Suzy 
TPAM never ever lied :p hahah
TPAM is a serial killer
TPAM breathes underwater through gills
TPAM steals candy from children
TPAM was part of a statistical research team analyzing trends in korean dramas and their affects on the mindsets of various audiences. 
TPAM beat up a bunch of other volunteers waiting in line, in order to be the first person to sign up for the study conducted by said statistical research team
TPAM escaped from a mental hospital.
TPAM has a secret lair in their backyard which is stocked with thirty years' worth of Doritos and bottled water.
TPAM only eats chocolate for Breakfast, lunch and dinner
TPAM never gets hungry
TPAM has built a hedge maze populated by garden gnomes