Xiang Liu and Xiao Yao’s Story and Romance

 Kokuto:

As I've said before, I hate to use labels like stalker or toxic abuser, because they lack context.  They are simplifications of actions that strip them of nuance and that ignore the complexity of the characters.  That said, Jing definitely gave off stalker and manipulator vibes to me, from the very beginning.  When XY told him he was healed and get lost, and he refused and pleaded pitiful to stay, the hair on the back of my neck went up.  Him saying he can't help himself when he follows her or does things to sway her, doesn't help either.

But, like I said, there's context.  I think Tong Hua meant these to be flaws, not character assassinations.

I don't want to do all the digging that would be necessary to find the original post, but I remember a YaoJing posting a long time ago about how XY and TSJ's traumas and insecurities are highly compatible. They aren't two healthy and emotionally well adjusted people who can have a healthy relationship, but they have somehow found a person who can at least give them what they feel they need. 

In TSJ's case, TSH's torture was designed to make him feel dehumanized and worthless. By not only healing him with great care, but actually clearly finding him physically attractive and blushing over his body, XY makes TSJ feel like a man again. He ends up re-building his sense of humanity and self-worth, but it's anchored to XY. What other people think doesn't matter. Only what she thinks matters. If she's dead, his life is worthless again. If she is no longer willing to have a relationship with him and treats him as a stranger, his health is affected so deeply that his life is endangered. 

In XY's case, she felt abandoned over and over again by the people who were supposed to love her. In most cases, they either abandoned her for her own good or for the good of the world. So she wants to find a person who is not capable of letting her go. Not even for those types of understandable reasons. TSJ is clingy and (with some notable caveats that are to his credit I think) not capable of letting XY go. She outright says she likes that, because it makes her feel secure. And when she constantly tests the endurance of his devotion, he's happy to prove himself over and over again. He does end up abandoning her twice. Once to marry another woman and once when he's murdered. But he definitely wasn't happy in both cases, and in both cases it was only temporary.

TSJ constantly following and watching XY is part of that dynamic. In context, it's not a fatal character flaw. Even if it is annoying for the readers / viewers. 

 blabla100:

I can't sympathize with drama Jing also because în the drama it feels as if he already has XY to himself and XL is just getting leftovers, while în the novel I admired his devotion to her even more because he knew about XY feelings for XL. But în the drama XL is... just a friend, so Jing comes off as controling. 

The interesting aspect is that the Jingers say the drama version made them love Jing even more. How odd.

 nathsketch:

The interesting aspect is that the Jingers say the drama version made them love Jing even more. How odd.

Jing or the actor who plays Jing? 

 blabla100:

Jing or the actor who plays Jing? 

I suppose they now love the character more because of the actor.

I didn't know these differences and nuances, obviously, because I didn't read the novel, but yikes, the book version does seem better than what we have in the drama. 

The drama version just made me stop watching it altogether and I can't bring myself to finish it.

 nathsketch:

I suppose they now love the character more because of the actor.

I didn't know these differences and nuances, obviously, because I didn't read the novel, but yikes, the book version does seem better than what we have in the drama. 

The drama version just made me stop watching it altogether and I can't bring myself to finish it.

If you still haven't finished watching s1 you should. From what I remember you telling me when you told me where you left off, you missed XY and XL's underwater date. It was really good. 

 fancy:

Which makes sense because for the novel there is more space to develop character arcs etc. Although, me saying this doesn't mean I don't appreciate certain aspects of TJC's XL and DW's Jing. I do and I like seeing these characters being brought to life but still. 

Yes, but S1 was quite similar to the novel, if S2 îs based on the script we all read, I, for one, won't be able to appreciate much any character. The acting/actors yes, but not the characters. 

 AH :

I wouldn't describe either XL or TSJ as abusive. I don't think I'd even describe either of them as toxic. 

But I also wouldn't describe either of them as healthy.

XL, XY, TSJ and CX all have trauma and issues. None of them are healthy and well adjusted. Their story wouldn't be as interesting if they were. 

THIS.  I keep saying this, but then I get accused of Stockholm Syndrome (JFC) or attacking Jing.  I joke about TJC Tunnel Vision Syndrome, but there are some serious blinders being worn by some folks about Jing.