*Spoiler* Character analysis of Kiyoi and Hira's development in the 3rd movie instalment.

Following on from my long analysis of Hira & Kiyoi's internal issues from Season 2 here: https://mydramalist.com/discussions/utsukushii-kare-season-2/111041-spoiler-character-analysis-for-hira-and-kiyoi-s-internal-conflicts-for-season-2?pid=2704771&page=1#p2704771

Note: This below analysis was written after watching the movie using the not-so-good AI-generated subs. 

KIYOI 

I will still stand by my first impression comment that I felt Kiyoi was a bit short-changed with his lack of perspective here, but if the movie is meant to conclude the whole UtsuKare series, I can understand why the focus had to be on Hira because while Kiyoi's main issue & fear was being abandoned (or being left alone), this cannot be addressed without addressing Hira's issues first.  

We can see Kiyoi's abandonment issue continue to manifest itself subtly in Kiyoi's desire for Hira's proactiveness, especially in bedroom matters. As someone who had always had a craving for attention & to be loved, and who was scared of being left behind, it made sense that Kiyoi would not have found as much pleasure & satisfaction from taking as opposed to receiving. Because, by receiving clear indications of being wanted, of being longed for, and of being desired so strongly, it satisfied Kiyoi's craving and his need for attention & love. 

Kiyoi wanted to be another's possession, as opposed to possessing others for himself. He wanted to belong to someone, and to be the only person in his lover's eyes. And he liked it when Hira wanted him and was obvious about it because it made him feel needed, loved and validated. 

I think this was why when he heard from Noguchi that Hira said he no longer had anything he wanted to photograph anymore, Kiyoi got upset inside. I suspect he was beginning to worry that Hira might no longer find him that beautiful anymore and was beginning to lose interest, that Hira might be growing cold on him. This was why Kiyoi got weirdly upset when they had to separate for a while during the Anna scandal - Kiyoi said something to the effect "where was that boy who punched Shirota for me?" and "you said you're a fan? We're boyfriends, right?!".

Kiyoi was looking for the crazy obsession ('where was the boy who punch Shirota for me?') & possessiveness and commitment ('we're boyfriends, right?') that he wanted from Hira towards him, and which was why he appeared really unhappy when he was all alone in the hotel because he never quite got the answers to those questions he posed to Hira, and he was not quite sure where he really stood in Hira's heart. 

I also felt this was why, during that 'wedding scene' in the music classroom, Kiyoi asked Hira if Hira regretted it, said something to the effect that time changes things - implying that people change and that Kiyoi himself won't be able to always stay beautiful forever. Kiyoi appeared to me to be worried that once he grew old and lost the beauty he once had when he was young, Hira would also lose the obssession & interest he once had in him too. That little childish grasp of Hira's jacket and that "don't leave me" plea, I thought it was such a sweet and vulnerable moment where Kiyoi let himself show to Hira just how scared he was of losing Hira one day.

It must have been such a great comfort and relief for Kiyoi's poor anxious heart to hear Hira say that "Kiyoi will always be beautiful no matter how he changes in future", and it must have been such a joy for Kiyoi to hear Hira make a solemn promise & commitment to be with him forever, because Kiyoi himself really needed to hear and receive such assurances from Hira. It was something Kiyoi had always been waiting for, and wanted from the very beginning.

And so, after a long and rocky road, Kiyoi finally got what he had wanted all along - his 'forever' with Hira here in this movie. <33

HIRA 

The movie spent bulk of the time addressing Hira's issue of #1. lack of self-confidence, and #2. worry over Kiyoi dumping him, because those two issues were the biggest and most problematic stumbling blocks so they really had no choice but to spend time to resolve those. Without resolving them, there was no way our boys could have their 'eternal'.  :(

#1. lack of self-confidence 

We can definitely see this in the whole photography issue with Noguchi and with the Nomura Ihei question. Part of Hira's problem with worrying over Kiyoi dumping him was thinking that he was just not good enough for Kiyoi. All those 'bottom of the pyramid' being a mismatch to those 'top of the pyramid' issues and insecurities. So, in this movie, Hira was trying to improve himself, and was attempting to raise himself up, so that he would be able to be a closer match for Kiyoi. 

This manifested in Hira's ambition and fervour to want to win the Nomura Ihei prize as fast and as soon as he possibly could (leading to him sharing this ambition with his photography class, and then posing that question on the internet asking if it was possible that a college student could win it). Seeing how good Noguchi was with his photography skills also made Hira realise the distance between them and how long a way he still needed to go, which was not exactly helping him with his self-confidence issues, alas.  

But I think Noguchi tried to address some of it in that gobbledygook conversation about 'over-confidence and under-confidence', and later by encouraging Hira to start a photobook collection and eventually doing a solo exhibition, culminating in Noguchi finally handing over the camera to Hira for him to take official studio photos. I love how supportive Noguchi was towards Hira despite all the teasing.

I would have liked to have a better idea of the conversations between Hira and Noguchi, I think it would help in understanding this aspect of Hira better but I think it was clear at the end of the movie that Hira definitely developed a greater confidence in himself at the end. Certainly, in that dialogue with Kiyoi where Kiyoi goes, "take better pictures of me than Noguchi", the fact that Hira went "of course" with an absolutely serious face, showed that, at least when it came to taking pictures of Kiyoi, Hira felt that there was no way he would lose to anybody. I love that new confidence he has of himself there.

#2. worry over Kiyoi dumping him 

I think the kidnap scene had to happen precisely because it directly addresses this fear. If one thinks about it, until the kidnap scene, one can't really blame Hira for worrying. Although Kiyoi was clear that he wanted to live with Hira and they even went house-hunting together, Hira probably still harboured a lot of doubts and insecurities. He definitely did not realise just how much Kiyoi also couldn't do without him and how scared Kiyoi was of being left by him. 

One couldn't really blame Hira because he always saw Kiyoi as this confident, domineering King - a rising star with such a great future in front of him. It must be unimaginable to Hira that Kiyoi would actually carry such simple fears & doubts about himself, especially over someone as unworthy as Hira.  

So, it took an injured Hira being able to witness Kiyoi's overwhelming distress, for Hira to finally realise just how much he meant to Kiyoi. And this definitely helped in giving Hira the confidence to keep staying by Kiyoi's side. 

I'm sure, in Hira's own mind prior to this incident, he felt that as long as Kiyoi continued to allow him, he would always stay with Kiyoi. But it was the depth of Kiyoi's feelings that always worried Hira, and that kidnap scene resolved it for him.  

So, after the kidnap incident, Hira was finally able to put down his worry over this. After realising that Kiyoi needed and wanted him as much as he needed and wanted Kiyoi, it finally crystalised in a heartfelt vow to be beside Kiyoi forever in that 'wedding scene'. I like that. Not 'behind', not 'from afar', but 'beside'. And all that proactiveness in grasping Kiyoi's hand, taking him around for a school run and always leading the way, wow, this was new confident Hira retracing old parts of their story with new ones, and finally managing to secure his 'forever' with Kiyoi. <33

---

The movie was certainly a fitting finale to what was, to me, a wonderfully crafted series. I liked how it still maintained continuity from the previous seasons with the consistent settings and throwbacks. It also nicely addressed the boys' individual issues from Seasons 1 & 2, and gave them good character & relationship growth, all things I treasure in my shows. It was a bumpy and tumultous journey, and our boys had to wade through blood, sweat and tears (literally as well as figuratively) as they learned to understand each other, but the effort was totally worth it to get the sunshine & rainbows at the end.

It was such a joy being able to follow this whole series from start to finish. I loved how disparate their characters were, yet although they were two opposing halves, they still completed each other in ways nobody else ever could. In each other, they found the things they needed and lacked in themselves, and found the motivation & hope to forge forward, both as individuals and as a couple. I loved how although there were misunderstandings and conflicts, they worked it out among themselves - wrestling with each other and coming to a better knowledge and understanding of each other all the time. It can be hard work and it can sometimes be frustrating, but this is what human relationships are like.

But ultimately, I loved how it was their love for each other that kept them going, that kept them from never giving up, and that kept them together in the end. I loved their journey, and am thankful that we got a chance to experience it all the way. Look at how much they've grown and how far they've come! Definitely one of my favourite BLs of all time. <3

Thanks for the spoiler review. This is interesting, once again I made sure that it is worth watching.

 MusicalVeggies:

Truly a picture is worth a thousand words.

Just from that initial scene, I was hooked, just as Hira was hooked. Thank you for your insightful review that reflect many of my thoughts, but you are far more eloquent.