H19279:
Chapter 25, FFB told XY that she graduated and no need to take archery lesson. Although, the title seems to link to her reaction when XY knew FFYY got pregnant but the poem was about the loss of zhiyin friend.

That is so cool that they referenced the zhiyin story of Boya and Zhong Zi in that chapter title.  It shows we are operating from the same references that Tong Hua is using.


 AH :
The Institute of East Asian Studies at the University of California Berkley published a lesson plan for English-speaking students learning Mandarin that includes a transcription of the story of Boya and Zhong Zi Qi provided by the Tang Bo Museum of Xian.

Thank you for this and all the links, as well as the references.  I haven't seen The Untamed or Word of Honor, so I'm sure I don't appreciate the quotes as much as I should.

 AH :
(1) Meeting a person from a totally different world / class / walk of life.

I do think agree they are people who come from two different worlds, but they tend to ignore their social status, which fluctuates anyway.  I still maintain, they consider each other equals.

 

 AH :
XY loses XL/FFB in different ways on several occasions throughout the novel, but the most devastating and permanent loss occurs when XY finds out about XL's death at the end of the novel. That marks the point in the story where XY decides to go to the ocean, leaving her old life and family behind. Boya was a qin player who gave up playing the qin. The life-altering decisions they make emphasize the impact of the loss caused by the death of their zhi yin / person who shared their understanding of music.

Question.  Didn't XY give up making poisons after the marriage robbery and the 'death' of FFB?  And then focused on healing and finishing the medicinal books?


 AH :
知音 manages to allude to all of that and captures the special nature of XL and XY's relationship, but does so in a way that is indirect enough that it is "safe" for XY to acknoweldge / say out loud.

Masterful.

I agree.  It's amazing, and shows how much we lose in translation.

 HeadInTheClouds:
Xiao Yao was in a very privileged position, IMO. Once she regained her identity she was probably the most privileged woman in the land. Her father, grandfather and CX all spoiled her rotten. Unlike other royal ladies who would be expected to marry for political alliances, XY could have done whatever the hell she wanted - marry or not marry - and her family would have backed her. CX would probably be jolly happy if she doesn't get married, ever :-). Girl should have just gone around the world trip, eaten all the food, and seen all the scenery. Makes new friends on the way. She wouldn't even have to worry about money issues. Maybe she's even met an interesting companion instead of moping around for some man. What a waste :-)!

I agree!  The more I read and think about it, I think Tong Hua should have had XY just leave the men and go running around the world -- maybe with A Ninian ... or even better Ru Shuo!

 plor20:

Thank you. It looks like conversations already shifted to XL's perception about life with WXL. Lmao. I will try to keep up. XD

The subjects jump around, sometimes faster than others, but feel free to bring up older topics.  Or just ask.  Most of us enjoy the different takes and clarifications of the subjects and texts.

 Kokuto:
Didn't XY give up making poisons after the marriage robbery and the 'death' of FFB?  And then focused on healing and finishing the medicinal books?

It was mentioned in chapter 36 that XY was back to practice archery and making poison for self-protection after the news of her biological father was spead out in chapter 36

The Yellow Emperor said nothing and Jing added “I know Your majesty is worried about her safety but she can’t hide here forever. These past few months Xiao Yao has picked up her archery again and is making poisons as well, she has the ability to protect herself.

During the time that she got engaged with Jing (42 years), TH did not tell the story what was going on, only a few events related to the war with Gao xing. So we don't know if she still making poison. For sure that she did not send poison to XL anymore. However, she used poison for her own protection too. So, I guessed she still did it. I think this sentence supported the proof that she still kept making poison during that 42 years

Xiao Yao grew solemn, these days she didn’t have any energy or interest in fiddling with her poisons or concoctions. (right after she returned from the assasination in the sea, Chapter 44)

That excerpt implies that she did not have energy or interest in making poisons around the time that Jing went missing until the planned date for wedding. Thus, it also means that she had done it before that period. And after that 1st assasination by Xing Yue, she was back to making poison seriously until she committed suicide (with CX in chapter 47). 

It's also worth to mention that XY stopped practising archery after farawell with XL in front of Xiao Zhurong's manson (in chapter 29). However, she intergrated the archery technique in her acupunture when she started studying medicine. Thus the way she performed acupunture was unique from all other doctors (From chapter 31). When she knew about the war with Gao Xing, she was so angry at CX althought Jing gave her some analysis and assured her that the war would not be so destructive as the war between Chi You and Yellow Emperor before. She took archery bow to the forest and practised for hours. 

Therefore, despite the loss of poison connection, she still kept making poison and subconsciously she kept archery. And it was archery skill that helped her fight agaist the murders that FL and Xing Yue sent to kill her in the 2nd assasination (Chapter 44)

 H19279:
what do you mean "feeling"? what kind of "feeling"?

The fact that TH did not give use words on XY's thought or feeling about XL, we always have to deduct her feeling to XL indirectly. I assume that you mean here that since when she realized that she had romantic feeling to him.

Yes, feelings here mean XY's love for Xiang Liu. As you said, TH doesn't give us XY's thoughts on her feelings and relationship with Xiang Liu, it has to be deducted via other means. The shift from the poisons being ugly and foul-tasting to beautiful works of art that taste good is one of the ways that we can see the shift in her emotions. XY may not even be aware of this. The act of making these poisons specifically for him, that help him to increase his spiritual power is also an act of love. And of course, there is that whole conversation about "gift" and the meaning of gift that we got between XY and FL in Book 2. 

And yes, to the other instances that you mentioned as examples of XL being on XY's mind. She was going to pretend not to know him and yet she's still creating poisons for him and carrying those poisons with her whenever she goes. For what purpose? Is not like anyone else could appreciate them. Is it because subconsciously she wants to see him again?


 H19279:
The man was so arrogant that he seemed to crush the whole world, but he looked at her mother His eyes were so gentle and lingering, and the way his mother looked at him... Xiaoyao didn't understand it at the time, but she understands it now.

The parallel between her father and Xiang Liu as well as her parents' romance and her and Xiang Liu's relationship had been explicitly stated in the novel. This to me, is very much about XY's feelings for Xiang Liu - seeing her mother in herself. So this, 

 H19279:
Xiaoyao sat up in shock, opened the small box at the head of the couch, and took out a bottle of green plum wine between the bottles filled with poison.

like you said, is her attempt to deny/suppress this realization. Tong Hua used of imagery with that box - XL took up the majority of her thought/life, and Jing is one speck. She has to consciously remind herself of Jing because a relationship with Xiang Liu is far too risky.

 plor20:

Thank you. It looks like conversations already shifted to XL's perception about life with WXL. Lmao. I will try to keep up. XD

Don't worry about bringing up posts and comments from way back. I do it all the time. Feel free to join us. You don't have to write essays to participate :-)

I've read a lot of articles analyzing vomiting blood... in the end I'm more convinced by all the analysis... thank you @H19279 for providing knowledge about the meaning of the poem.

 AH :
This makes me think that XY referring to XL as 知音 in chapter 19 (in the context of XL/FFB being the only person in the world who truly understands and appreciates her poison creations) is incredibly apt for several reasons:

There are 2 things that were mentioned in the conversation: poison and archery. XL was the only person in the world who truly understood, appreaciated and enjoyed XY's poison art. And in reverse, XY was the only person in the world who knew XL was expert in archery and he could show it, transfer the skill to her (As CX in chapter 46 said he sent a lot of spies to investigate on XL but no report mentioned that XL was so good at archery)

I'm bringing a new friend here, folks. She has been bullied by those darn Jingers >:(

 Kokuto:

 AH :
The Institute of East Asian Studies at the University of California Berkley published a lesson plan for English-speaking students learning Mandarin that includes a transcription of the story of Boya and Zhong Zi Qi provided by the Tang Bo Museum of Xian.
Thank you for this and all the links, as well as the references.

You're welcome. ^^ Very happy to share them and to have an opportunity to learn more about this topic.


 Kokuto:
I haven't seen The Untamed or Word of Honor, so I'm sure I don't appreciate the quotes as much as I should.

My experience with the Untamed was similar to my experience with LYF in that I watched the drama, read the novel, and read the manhua (and watched the anime ... still waiting on nathsketch's animated series for LYF ^^) and found myself going back for more over and over again. HeadInTheClouds  and I recently chatted about the similarities between XL/XY from LYF and LWJ/WWX from the Untamed.

Word of Honor wasn't my cup of tea, but it's similar to the Untamed in the sense that they are both wuxia dramas with censored M/M relationships that are based on novels with explicitly romantic M/M relationships. And they both heavily emphasize the 知己 / 知音 vibes between the leads.


 Kokuto:

 AH :
(1) Meeting a person from a totally different world / class / walk of life.
I do think agree they are people who come from two different worlds, but they tend to ignore their social status, which fluctuates anyway.  I still maintain, they consider each other equals.

Yes, social status doesn't matter to them. I only mention this aspect of similarity between their circumstances (in terms of different status / worlds) and the circumstances of Yu Boya and Zhong Ziqi because I think the fact that they (both XL+XY and YBY+ZZQ) were able to find such a unique and deep connection of understanding in each other was made all the more special because they found that connection in such an unexpected place / person, and because that connection was able to bridge such a wide gap. 

With XL and XY, the differences they overcame (and, in some ways, didn't overcome) went beyond social status. XL is one of the most (if not *the* most) powerful soldiers in Dahuang, and he is a central figure in an ongoing war. After her mother's "death" and losing her high spiritual power, XY had no interest in fighting in wars and preferred the quiet life of a civilian away from political conflict (even though she ended up helping CX with his political ambitions out of love and loyalty to him). Later on she ends up living in the palaces of Xuan Yuan with her grandfather, the Yellow Emperor himself. They are on opposite sides of a war (recognizing that XY is in a weird position of not being directly involved in the conflict, but still being inextricably tied to multiple key players). 

As a list, the factors in my mind are something like:

  • Didn't know his family / former slave / rebel / concubine-born second son of a minor noble family vs. most prestigious combination of royal and noble bloodlines in Dahuang (with the obvious caveats)
  • Full demon vs. full deity
  • Highest spiritual power vs. low spiritual power
  • Deadly solider vs. civilian / medical practitioner
  • Gong Gong / Sheng Nong remnant army vs. Cang Xuan / Xuan Yuan royal family (opposing loyalties / opposite sides of the war)

And yet, they found they were so alike and were able to share such a deep understanding and appreciation of one another. 


 Kokuto:

 AH :
XY loses XL/FFB in different ways on several occasions throughout the novel, but the most devastating and permanent loss occurs when XY finds out about XL's death at the end of the novel. That marks the point in the story where XY decides to go to the ocean, leaving her old life and family behind. Boya was a qin player who gave up playing the qin. The life-altering decisions they make emphasize the impact of the loss caused by the death of their zhi yin / person who shared their understanding of music.
Question.  Didn't XY give up making poisons after the marriage robbery and the 'death' of FFB?  And then focused on healing and finishing the medicinal books?

After FFB's "death" there were still points in the story where XY made poisons for functional purposes (e.g., poison for the arrows she uses to defend herself in chapter 44 and the poison she made to torture TSJ's murderer), but the poisons that XY made for XL were much more than functional. They were beautifully crafted and delicious creations, and she put her feelings into them. I don't think XY ever made those types of poison creations for anyone else before or after FFB's "death". He was the only person who could appreciate them.


 Kokuto:

 AH :
知音 manages to allude to all of that and captures the special nature of XL and XY's relationship, but does so in a way that is indirect enough that it is "safe" for XY to acknoweldge / say out loud.

Masterful.
I agree.  It's amazing, and shows how much we lose in translation.

So much!


 Kokuto:
I agree!  The more I read and think about it, I think Tong Hua should have had XY just leave the men and go running around the world -- maybe with A Ninian ... or even better Ru Shuo!

In XY's defense, she did try something along those lines. But at that point she wasn't able to use the face forming flower to transform (it seems like she didn't get that ability back until chapter 37), she still believed that the Grand Emperor was her father + was officially a princess of Gao Xing, and her relationship with Cang Xuan and the Yellow Emperor was not damaged the way it was by the time she left at the end of the novel. The Grand Emperor didn't let XY leave Five Gods Mountain and CX didn't let her stay away from his side for more than 13 months. 

-----

Chapter 30:

Ah Nian retorted, “Seeing as how you spoke up on my behalf, I wanted to give you some advice but you’re not taking me seriously! Let me tell you, if you keep being like this then one day you will fall into Xing Yue’s hands! I suggest you come back to Gao Xing with me. On Five Gods Mountain, no one will dare do anything to you!”

Xiao Yao smiled and said nothing. Her dad was on Five Gods Mountain but because her mom divorced her dad and she followed her mom to Cao Yun Peak, she always felt like her Dad, Consort Jing An, and Ah Nian was one complete family unit while she was the outsider. She felt more like family living with the Yellow Emperor and Zhuan Xu.

But Ah Nian was right, Zhuan Xu’s home was about to get its mistress of the house and Xiao Yao’s personality likely wouldn’t win any favors with the new mistress.

She used to think that no matter what happened, her Gege’s home would always be her home. But this day arrived with the truth so sobering, her Gege’s home was his home and she could stay for as long as she wanted but it was living under someone’s roof. She would need to endure the owner’s whims and avoid being disliked.

Ah Nian saw Xiao Yao wasn’t ready to go back and added, “If you don’t like living in Five Gods Mountain and can’t stay in Sheng Nong Mountain, then you only have another path left.”

“What?”

“Get married! Marrying is the only way out for a woman, unless you want to go to Jade Mountain and be the next Royal Mother.” Ah Nian sighed, “But even if you got married it would be a problem. Feng Long lives in Zhi Yi and Zhuan Xu gege might even give him a residence on Sheng Nong Mountain. He’s very sociable and is the Chi Sui clan leader and you are his wife so you need to know how to socialize. But you…..you’re socially awkward and don’t know how to even dress. Now people are already mocking you behind your back about how much embarrassing situations will arise in the future. If you don’t get on the good side of the Empress, who knows how the days will be like for you down the road……Sigh!”

Xiao Yao said, “You stop it, I’m already despondent and if you keep talking then I’ll feel like my life is such an utter failure without any hope left.”

Ah Nian burst out giggling. “I was feeling miserable but seeing you like this makes me feel like I’m not as bad off as you.”

Xiao Yao stood up. “Get some sleep! Tomorrow I’ll go back to Five Gods Mountain with you.

“Eh? Why?”

“What do you mean why? I need to interact less with Xing Yue to maintain our past friendship. If we live in the same palace and ignore each other, the past friendly feelings will get wiped away and I’ll start to get on her nerves. Best leave as soon as I can!”

Ah Nian smiled. “So you were listening to what I said earlier.”

“You have more experience than me in terms of being a woman in the palace. I ought to listen to you more."

Ah Nian nodded. “That’s more like it.”

Xiao Yao left Ah Nian’s residence and thought that she ought to say goodbye to Zhuan Xu tonight if she was leaving tomorrow. But she didn’t even know which of his wive’s residences he was in right now.

Xiao Yao smiled wistfully, it really wasn’t the same as before! She couldn’t go find her Gege anytime she wanted.

Xiao Yao sighed, time to go back! It doesn’t matter when she said her farewells, tonight or tomorrow, if she was leaving anyway.

Xiao Yao returned to her residence and laid down on her pallet but couldn’t sleep. When she lost Jing she felt that she still had Zhuan Xu and no matter what happened she would never lose him.

But tonight she felt for the first time that she was gradually losing Zhuan Xu.

Years ago they held hands and walked up Cao Yun Peak, facing adversity that did not defeat them or make them give up on each other. But now they reached the end, there were so many things and people gradually forming between them that it naturally split them apart.

It wasn’t that one wanted to leave the other or the other stopped caring, it was life being so merciless and unwittingly leading them to this point.

Xiao Yao felt her heart constricting tightly so she sat up and took deep breaths. It started with being sleepless but over time she seemed to have developed a heart problem. She knew Xiang Liu was being bothered by her right now.

All these years in the deep dark of the night, when she was at her most painful to endure moments, knowing someone was experiencing the same feeling made her feel she wasn’t alone. It made her feel like he was right there keeping her company and it comforted her a lot.

In the poison packages she sent him, she wrote in a letter apologizing for disturbing him and reminding him to go to Jiu Li with her when he had time. But Xiang Liu never replied and Xiao Yao didn’t dare mention it a second time.

Xiao Yao clutched her heart and slowly laid back down. After laying for a long time, she slowly fell asleep.

The next morning when Xiao Yao went to see the Yellow Emperor, Ah Nian and Zhuan Xu were both there.

Ah Nian looked terrible, her eyes were still red and swollen likely having cried some more. Zhuan Xu also looked weary with dark circles under his eyes as if he didn’t sleep a wink last night. Xiao Yao wanted to laugh and didn’t realize that she also looked as bad.

Zhuan Xu said to Xiao Yao, “I spoke with Grandfather and have decided to make Xing Yue my Empress.”

Ah Nian quietly sat beside the Yellow Emperor and remained placid but not smiling. If Ah Nian didn’t object then Xiao Yao had even less reason to object so she said, “Fine!”

Zhuan Xu stared at Xiao Yao with his eyes blazing but Xiao Yao just smiled.

Ah Nian said to Xiao Yao, “I already told Grandfather and said goodbye to Gege. We’ll leave in a bit for Five Gods Mountain.”

Xiao Yao said with a smile to Zhuan Xu and the Yellow Emperor, “I haven’t been back to see Dad in a long time, so I plan to go with Ah Nian.

The Yellow Emperor said, “It’ll be good to go back and see your Dad.”

Zhuan Xu asked, “When will you be coming back?”

Xiao Yao was taken aback, when will she be coming back? She really didn’t think about it! Not like before when she knew she would be coming back to Zhuan Xu so she didn’t take much with her when she left. This time she subconsciously knew she wasn’t planning to come back so she told Shan Hu to pack everything.

Xiao Yao smiled, “Haven’t decided when to come back, let me spend some time with my Dad before deciding.”

When Xiao Yao went back to Gao Xing in the past she said the same thing but this time Zhuan Xu felt Xiao Yao’s tone of voice was very dismissive. He wanted to press her more but with his grandfather and Ah Nian there he couldn’t ask so he casually said “Fine.” Zhuan Xu understood for the first time that the more nervous a person was, the more it was tucked deep inside.

Zhuan Xu didn’t go back to handle his official matters and just kept Ah Nian and Xiao Yao company. Ah Nian was reluctant to leave and kept by Zhuan Xu’s side while Xiao Yao attended to the Yellow Emperor and checked his vitals before reminding him of all the things he needed to pay attention to about his health.

These past years with Xiao Yao tending to him and his cooperation, the Yellow Emperor’s health had improved dramatically. If he remained cloistered away in Sheng Nong Mountain taking care of himself then he would have no problem living another few hundred years.

Zhuan Xu summoned some snacks and dined with Xiao Yao and Ah Nian. After they finished was when Hai Tang came to report “The luggage is all packed, do the princesses want to depart now?”

Xiao Yao and Ah Nian stood up and bowed to the Yellow Emperor who said to Zhuan Xu “After you send them off go handle your affairs, no need to come back to see me.”

“Yes!”

Zhuan Xu accompanied Xiao Yao and Ah Nian to the cloud carriage. As they neared Zhuan Xu saw five large cloud carriages stuffed with luggage trailing behind the passenger one.

Xiao Yao never used luggage carriages when she left so Zhuan Xu chuckled “Ah Nian, you sure have a lot of luggage, did you clean out your entire residence?”

Ah Nian blinked a few times. “It’s not all mine.”

Zhuan Xu turned and stared at Miao Pu who reported, “Three of the luggage carriages contain the Eldest Princess’s luggage.”

Zhuan Xu’s expression shuttered so quickly Miao Pu was alarmed and immediately knelt down. Zhuan Xu calmed himself and turned back around with a smile. “Xiao Yao, you come here, I have something to say to you.”

Xiao Yao was already sitting in the cloud carriage with her eyes closed ready to nap so she yawned and walked out of the cloud carriage. Zhuan Xu pulled her to the side while she lazily asked, “What’s so important?”

Ah Nian stared curiously at them but Zhuan Xu placed a spell so she couldn’t hear anything.

Zhuan Xu asked Xiao Yao, “When are you coming back?”

“I haven’t thought about it, I want to live with Dad for a bit and then think about coming back!” Xiao Yao was perplexed, didn’t he already ask her before?

“Can you come back in one month?”

“No way!” With the wedding discussions just underway, Zhuan Xu and Xing Yue’s wedding couldn’t be held in just one month.

“Can you come back in two months?”

“Probably not.”

“Three months?”

“No.”

“Four months?”

“No.”

Zhuan Xu actually went down the list of months one by one while Xiao Yao said a string of no, not likely, and probably nots.

…………………..

“Can you come back in thirteen months?”

Xiao Yao felt she couldn’t say “probably not” to that so slowly said, “I don’t know.”

Zhuan Xu said, “Fine, I’ll send someone to fetch you in thirteen months.”

Xiao Yao quickly added, “No need, if I want to come back then I’ll come back.”

Zhuan Xu appeared to not hear what she said. “In thirteen months, I’ll send someone to fetch you back.”

Without waiting for Xiao Yao’s reply, he walked towards the cloud carriage ready to send her off.

Xiao Yao walked over and muttered, “Coming and going, I’m already used to it, why need someone to come fetch me? What if thirteen months later I’m not ready to come back, wouldn’t that be a wasted trip? Whatever!”

Zhuan Xu stopped and stared at Xiao Yao and it actually made her heart lurch so she quickly looked down.

Zhuan Xu said, “If you don’t come back, I will go to Five Gods Mountain to get you.” And then he walked off in big fast strides.

...

A month and a half later, the Xuan Yuan Emperor Zhuan Xu married the direct descendant of the Sheng Nong royal family Sheng Nong Xing Yue as his Empress.

...

With half the vast wilderness celebrating the marriage of the Xuan Yuan Emperor and Empress, even Gao Xing was affected. The songs being sung in the tea houses are all celebrating the marriage and everyone who heard it was happy except for Xiao Yao and Ah Nian.

Xiao Yao started to really understand what Ah Nian said, the Empress was not like the other women. In the past it didn’t matter who Zhuan Xu married, Xiao Yao didn’t feel anything. She saw Ah Nian and Xing Yue tussling but it didn’t involve her because she would always be Zhuan Xu’s little sister no matter who he married. But this time she really felt Zhuan Xu belonged to someone else, even if she was his little sister she couldn’t be by his side anymore. From now on, it was Xing Yue who would be happy when he was happy and sad when he was sad. Xiao Yao couldn’t lay under the moonlight with him chatting or when she got sick he couldn’t sleep in the outside room all night keeping her company.

Xiao Yao had no choice but to admit that Xing Yue stole the person she was closest with.

Xiao Yao confided her sadness to Ah Nian but Ah Nian didn’t pity her and instead said, “Even you have this day.” After she mocked Xiao Yao was when Ah Nian felt even worse, in the past she felt Xiao Yao and Zhuan Xu’s closeness gave her a leg up over all the other women, but now even Xiao Yao felt like Xing Yue stole Zhuan Xu, wouldn’t that mean she was even further from Zhuan Xu from now on?

___________________________

Xiao Yao still couldn’t sleep well at night so she rose well past noon. After dining she would go to Qi Qing Garden not to swim but just to sit in a daze staring at the water in the pool.

One evening the Grand Emperor walked into Qi Qing Garden and saw Xiao Yao sitting in a daze next to the water. It was already dark out and with Xiao Yao’s low powers she couldn’t be able to see in the dark.

The Grand Emperor asked, “You stare at the water every day deep in thought. It’s been a few months, you have any conclusions?”

Xiao Yao said, “I was thinking about when I was small and how my mom loved me so. If she loved me so much, why did she still abandon me for the greater good of the world? She couldn’t bear to see other kids lose their parents, but she allowed me to lose my mom. I’ve been thinking that had she not abandoned me and watched me grow up, what would I be like? Will my personality not be as weird? Will I be happier than I am now?

The Grand Emperor said “Xiao Yao, you’re being swallowed up by your own insecurity. If it’s because of that Tu Shan clan little fox, I’ll go snatch him for you.”

Xiao Yao smiled, “Dad, are you forgetting I already have a fiance?”

The Grand Emperor was taken aback and then said, “I’ll write to Chi Sui Feng Long to have him come keep you company.”

Xiao Yao said, “Sure, tell him to come see me!”

Like Zhuan Xu said, the cure for a sadness is to fill up the void again and use happiness to smooth over the pain. Actually the best way to heal from losing a lover was to find a new lover, but Feng Long…..his lover was his vast ambition.

Feng Long received the letter from the Grand Emperor and traveled day and night to come see Xiao Yao. He spent a day and a half with her before traveling all night back to the Middle Plains.

The Grand Emperor wanted to say something to Feng Long but saw that he did drop everything to come be with Xiao Yao. He was also going back to handle important matters and not to booze and play around. Feng Long did nothing wrong by putting his career first so the Grand Emperor could only sigh.

Xiao Yao told her dad she didn’t want to live on Five Gods Mountain anymore but he wouldn’t let her leave. The father-daughter fight ended in a compromise, Xiao Yao left Cheng En Court and went to Ying Province Island.

In the past Xiao Yao was always in ready-to-fight mode as she earnestly learned her poisons and practiced her archery. After losing Jing and seeing Zhuan Xu ascend the throne, she had nothing left to lose and nothing left to protect. Xiao Yao deflated entirely and gave up her archery and didn’t study poisons other than to make poisons for Xiang Liu.

She had a lot of free time now and to pass the time she opened a medical clinic on the island. It was normal to have female doctors in the vast wilderness but Xiao Yao always wore a veil so it was hard for patients to trust her which is why her clinic had very few patients.

Xiao Yao didn’t mind, every day after lunch she would open the doors to see patients with Shan Hu waiting in the front while Xiao Yao was in the back reading medical texts and studying herbs.

Sometimes a few poor patients would come by since they couldn’t afford the other clinics. They tried out Xiao Yao’s treatment and discovered it worked so gradually more patients came. But it was always the poor fisherman from the area and sometimes they even paid her in fresh caught fish.

Xiao Yao would then cook the fish for Shan Hu and Miao Pu and both girls found their mouths watering to discover the Princess cooked fish as good as the royal chefs!

This type of ordinary life went on day after day until Xiao Yao forgot how much time passed. Then the person sent by Zhuan Xu arrived to fetch her and she realized thirteen months had passed. But she didn’t want to go back. In the past she accompanied him because the road was dangerous and no one else would walk with him but her.

Now he was the ruler of a kingdom with the bravest men following him and the most beautiful women by his side. His grand ambitions were slowly taking shape. And she was tired and wanted to live only this ordinary life and didn’t want to face the ups and downs that affected countless lives.

Xiao Yao wrote a letter and had the servant bring it to Zhuan Xu. She waited a few days and saw Zhuan Xu had no response and took that as his consent for her not to go back. She let out a sigh of relief and went back to living her boring life.

A few days later, a fisherman brought Xiao Yao a basket of fresh caught sea urchin at her request. She had discovered new herbs not cataloged in the Sheng Nong Herb Manual – when the Flame Emperor was writing it he lived inland so didn’t have a lot of access to herbs in the sea. Xiao Yao discovered new herbs from the ocean after talking to the fishermen and hearing their own concoctions and sea urchin was one such new find.

Xiao Yao pulled up her sleeve and started cleaning the sea urchin, the meat could be eaten tonight while the shell would be dried and turned into good medicine.

The courtyard door opened and a person walked in.

Xiao Yao had her hands full so didn’t lift her head. “Go wait in the front if you are here to see the doctor.”

The person said nothing and also made no move to leave.

Xiao Yao raised her head and saw it was Zhuan Xu and was so startled her knife slipped and cut her finger.

“Is it serious?” Zhuan Xu hurriedly asked.

Xiao Yao pressed down on her bleeding finger “Why are you here? Are you crazy?”

“Let me see it.”

Xiao Yao handed her hand to Zhuan Xu and said, “I’m fine! You’re the one in danger!

Zhuan Xu used his handkerchief and water to clean the wound and then took out pills which he crushed over the wound and the blood stopped. Xiao Yao asked, “Who knows you’re here?”

“If you leave with me right now, not many people will know. If you don’t leave with me right now, I don’t know who will find out. Maybe…..the entire vast wilderness!

“You…..are you threatening me? Are you using my worry for your safety?” Xiao Yao asked in disbelief.

Zhuan Xu raised an eyebrow and thought about what she said before replying, “Yes, I am putting myself in danger to pressure you.”

Zhuan Xu was being such a bastard right now! When Xiao Yao lived in the market place she was also used to being a bastard so now she was ready to see who was more unreasonable! Xiao Yao said “I don’t believe that if I don’t leave with you then you won’t go back! Stay if you want!” Xiao Yao sat back down and resumed cleaning the sea urchin.

Zhuan Xu kicked a wooden stool over and pulled his sleeves up and sat down to help Xiao Yao clean the sea urchin. He didn’t even need a paring knife and with a light squeeze of his hand he pulled out the meat cleanly. He also spent plenty of time down in the market places with the ruffians and right now it was two equally stubborn bastards butting heads. The one that was more ruthless was going to win.

Zhuan Xu cleaned the sea urchin and discussed with Xiao Yao how to eat it. He lived in Gao Xing for two hundred years and knew way more about how to prepare seafood. Xiao Yao was in a daze, Zhuan Xu always gave in to her and she never opposed his wishes. This was the first time in their lives where they butted heads and Xiao Yao actually didn’t know what to do.

The two finished cleaning the sea urchin and Zhuan Xu helped Xiao Yao wash the shells.

A patient arrived and Xiao Yao put on a veiled hat and ran out to see the patient all while praying that Zhuan Xu would be gone by the time she got back.

When she got back, Zhuan Xu was still there and cutting firewood for her.

It was getting dark and Zhuan Xu headed to the kitchen to start dinner. Xiao Yao stood in the courtyard as stiff as a wooden board and so was Miao Pu and Shan Hu. After half an hour Zhuan Xu called out “Dinnertime!”

Miao Pu awoke from her daze and ran into the kitchen to bring out the dishes. Gao Xing was warm all year round so most families dined outside in the courtyard. Miao Pu wiped down the table and set it with the dishes and utensils.

Zhuan Xu called out “You guys come in and eat as well.

Almost ten of Zhuan Xu’s personal guards filed in and Miao Pu handed them each a bowl of food and each took it silently and went to the corner to eat.

Zhuan Xu said to Xiao Yao “Let’s sit down and eat!”

He prepared a bowl for Xiao Yao and she silently ate from it. He placed a piece of sea urchin in her bowl “Try it.”

Xiao Yao ate it but couldn’t taste anything.

After dinner Zhuan Xu didn’t appear to be planning to leave. He told Miao Pu to prepare bedding for him and he started heating water in the kitchen to run a bath.

Xiao Yao finally couldn’t take it anymore and asked, “Are you really doing this?”

Zhuan Xu said, “Do you think I traveled thousands of miles to Five Gods Mountain to come play around with you?”

Xiao Yao knew she had to be ruthless to win but she couldn’t play around with Zhuan Xu’s personal safety so she tossed in the towel and angrily said, “I’ll go with you! But you remember that I didn’t go willingly!”

Zhuan Xu said nothing and with the wave of his hand all the fires in the kitchen went out. He walked out and called, “Back to Sheng Nong Mountain.”

 AH :
and watched the anime ... still waiting on nathsketch's animated series for LYF ^^)

I'm getting started, folks. Funny you should mention that today of all days :)

 H19279:
It's also worth to mention that XY stopped practising archery after farawell with XL in front of Xiao Zhurong's manson (in chapter 29). However, she intergrated the archery technique in her acupunture when she started studying medicine. Thus the way she performed acupunture was unique from all other doctors (From chapter 31).

Agreed. 

XY's experience with poisons also played a role in her medical studies, as she had a greater personal knowledge of herbs than her teacher, the best doctor in Xuan Yuan Palace. 

-----

Chapter 35:

Xiao Yao opened a little medical clinic in a rundown alley in Zhi Yi Castle. It wasn’t her first time opening a clinic but this time wasn’t like in Qing Shui Town when she used the Sheng Nong Herb Manual tricks to earn a living. It also wasn’t like on Five Gods Mountain when she was passing time, this time she was sincerely using her medical skills to save lives.

Xiao Yao practiced medicine at the same time she kept learning, she didn’t go to the class anymore since the medical teaching there wasn’t enough for her needs anymore. She had Zhuan Xu order the best doctor in the Xuan Yuan Palace to personally teach her.

Zhuan Xu smiled. “My best doctor is Yin, but he’s a mute and hard to communicate with.”

Xiao Yao replied, “No problem, I can learn sign language.”

Yin was a medical savant and thought it a waste of his time to teach Xiao Yao but couldn’t disobey Zhuan Xu’s command. He reluctantly came but after interacting with Xiao Yao he was truly happy that he did come.

Xiao Yao’s medical knowledge could not compare to Yin who learned since childhood, but she wandered the world, lived in the wilderness, and spent hundreds of years delving into poisons. Her personal knowledge of herbs was far greater than Yin’s understanding and she could rattle off anything so Yin felt like he wasn’t teaching Xiao Yao as much as she was teaching him.


 H19279:
12 hours ago
 AH :
This makes me think that XY referring to XL as 知音 in chapter 19 (in the context of XL/FFB being the only person in the world who truly understands and appreciates her poison creations) is incredibly apt for several reasons:
There are 2 things that were mentioned in the conversation: poison and archery.

Yes, XY mentions archery later in that conversation, but it was a thinly veiled way for her to ask XL if he was still angry with her. Although 知音 fits may aspects of their relationship, which perhaps includes their shared experience with archery, it seems to me that XY bringing up this term in that conversation was very much about XL's unique position as the only person in the world who could understand and appreciate her poison-making talents, just as Ziqi was the only person who could understand and appreciate Boya's qin playing talents. 

-----

Chapter 19:

Zhi Jin Peak, a bright and glorious morning.

Xiao Yao was tending to the fire pit and her face was bright red with sweat dotting her forehead.

She felt the time was right and put on her gloves before opening the cover of the pot to take out the mold. She put it inside a pail of ice water until the mold solidified. Xiao Yao poured the mold out and individual mold pieces tumbled on the table, some pink, others green, and even yellow.

Zhuan Xu walked into this “medicine making room” and saw Xiao Yao intent on her work. He said nothing and stood in the corner to watch quietly. There were colorful molds strewn all over the table but the shapes were odd. Some looked like flower petals, others like leaves, he really couldn’t figure out what she was making.

Xiao Yao took out a rectangular glass plate, it was dark on both ends and white in the middle like the backdrop of an ink portrait with nothing on it.

Xiao Yao used a brush and covered the white part once with a liquid.

Xiao Yao washed her hands and then put it in the ice water for some time before wiping it with a clean cloth. She then picked up the molds from earlier and used a small paring knife to start carving the molds. She finished one and would put it on the plate as if she was painting on it.

Zhuan Xu was curious so walked over and he saw Xiao Yao’s slender fingers expertly at work and gradually the white plate was covered with a green lily frond and there was dew on it that appeared like it was about to slide off. A pink lily appeared and the yellow nectar inside formed. Within the lilies two salmon peeked out from under the water shyly.

The entire morning passed and an entire salmon frolicking in a lily pond tableau was created. Other than having no sound, everything was there, even the scent of the lilies.

Xiao Yao stared at it intently and then smiled in satisfaction.

Zhuan Xu clapped. “Scent, visuals, and taste – it’s all there. Makes me want to take a bite.”

Xiao Yao made a face at him. “It’s all poison.

Zhuan Xu shook his head. “I can’t figure out what this weird hobby of yours is. Who makes poisons into a delicacy? Your poison-making room is pretty much a kitchen.

Xiao Yao carefully picked up the plate and put it inside a box before shutting it and wrapping it up in a cloth.

Zhuan Xu asked warily, “You can’t be giving that to someone?”

Xiao Yao laughed. “Secret.”

Zhuan Xu sighed, “I can’t decide if you like this person, or hate this person.”

After a morning of sitting Xiao Yao’s back ached and she rubbed her back and asked, “How come you have time to come watch me make poisons?”

Zhuan Xu said, “I have something to discuss with you.”

Xiao Yao got serious. “Go ahead.”

...

Xiao Yao pushed Zhuan Xu out the door. “This ‘kitchen’ of mine is full of poison so when I’m not here don’t go in.”

______________________________

A dance hall, a dancer was gracefully dancing.

Xiao Yao smiled and placed a white wrapped box in front of Fang Feng Bei.

Bei glanced over it and drawled, “What’s that?”

Xiao Yao said, “You open it.”

Bei shook his cup. “I’m drinking right now.”

Xiao Yao clenched her fist – be patient, be patient, be patient! She released her fist and opened the cloth cover over the box.

Bei was still uninterested and continued drinking his wine and watching the dancer dancing.

Xiao Yao had no choice but to open the box herself. When she made it, to create the scent of the lilies she spent a lot of time on it. Right now the scent of the lilies were lost in the pungent odor of the food and the perfumes around them so it wasn’t noticeable anymore.

Xiao Yao rushed here excitedly with a whole bellyful of things she wanted to say to him. She wanted to boast about how she made the poison lilies, how she made the leaf covers, but now the entire salmon frolicking in the lilies tableau turned dim and she didn’t feel like saying anything anymore. She picked up her wine and started drinking and pouting.

Bei finally turned his gaze from the dancer to the table and checked out the tableau on the glass plate. It was delicate and full of life, the colors vibrant and the items exquisitely rendered.

Bei stared for some time before picking up a chopstick and eating a lily frond.

One bite after another, one lily frond, one salmon, one lily…..slowly he ate the entire salmon frolicking in lilies tableau.

Xiao Yao gaped at him. “You….don’t stuff yourself silly.”

Bei shot her a look and she immediately shut up.

Bei ate the final bite and put down his chopstick. He took a sip of wine and casually said, “Not bad.”

Xiao Yao stared at the empty plate and her heart soared, “The only person who can make poisons this tasty in the entire world is me!”

Bei laughed back, “And the only person in the entire world who can appreciate your great “cooking” talents is me!”

Xiao Yao sassed back, “It’s enough to have a true [zhi yin (知音) / person who understands music (alluding to a person like Ziqi and the unique relationship he had with Boya as the only person in the entire world who understood and appreciated Boya's music)].”

Bei gave her a half-smile but said nothing.

Xiao Yao asked, “Can you continue teaching me archery now?” What she really meant to ask was – are you not angry at me anymore?

Bei finished his wine. “I need to leave for a bit, wait for me to come back.”

Xiao Yao figured he was going back to Qing Shui town. Even if there was no active warfare, he was still the General of the Sheng Nong resistance army and there was much he had to do.

Xiao Yao couldn’t help it and sighed loudly and murmured, “If only you can forever be Fang Feng Bei, that would be so great.”

Bei appeared not to have heard her as he set down his wine cup and got up to leave, his form disappearing in the layers of curtains.


 H19279:
XL was the only person in the world who truly understood, appreaciated and enjoyed XY's poison art.

100% agree.


 H19279:
And in reverse, XY was the only person in the world who knew XL was expert in archery and he could show it, transfer the skill to her (As CX in chapter 46 said he sent a lot of spies to investigate on XL but no report mentioned that XL was so good at archery)

FFB was known to be an expert in archery, along with the rest of the FF family. Those who knew that FFB was XL (which did include XY, but also included Li Jie Chang and his uncle, TSJ and possibly others) knew that XL was an expert in archery. CX did not know that FFB was XL when he shot Feng Long in chapter 46, but he confirmed that FFB was XL in chapter 50.

I agree that XL was the only person in the world who was both willing and able to teach someone like XY (someone with low spiritual powers) the kind of archery she wanted to learn in order to be able to protect herself and others (e.g., CX). 

For each other, they are also the only people who can fully appreciate spending time in the ocean together like they did in chapter 26, and the only people who can hear and appreciate the merpeople's song.

 nathsketch:
19 minutes ago
 AH :
and watched the anime ... still waiting on nathsketch's animated series for LYF ^^)
I'm getting started, folks. Funny you should mention that today of all days :)

 Kokuto:
This is again some weird hypocrisy on XY's side again, and shows how desperately she repeatedly gives Jing chances that she refuses to give XL.

I think the stake is relatively lower with Jing compared to Xiang Liu. Remember as well that the person that XY wants is YSQ rather than Jing for reasons that I mentioned in my post a few posts up. She can compromise with Jing because even with his responsibility to his clans, his responsibility doesn't necessarily place him in conflict with CX and it doesn't end with him dying on the battlefield. Her obsessive insistent on having someone who will never leave her/will place her as the first choice hindered her from taking the risk with Xiang Liu.


 Kokuto:
Jing being Clan Leader is the same as XL being a general. Both are responsible for a big group of people. Both require their leaders to put them first, over their love life

In a way, XL and Jing are placed in a similar dilemma. It's just that one of them is willing to cast aside their responsibility while the other isn't.

If anything, you would think it would have been easier for XL to walk away since he isn't beholden to the Shen Nong Army and after 400 years, whatever debt he owns Gong Gong would have been cleared. He would have shed enough blood already to repay that debt. Jing on the other hand; this was his family, the family that raised him and nurtured him. Everything he has, he owed to them. He wants to stay on as clan leader for Xiao Yao and abdicate the position for Xiao Yao. He has "love brain", as the new perlance would put it :-). Personally, making someone your entire raison d'etre isn't my cup of tea :-)

I don't find Jing wanting to abdicate his position as leader to be an issue. It's Jing's willingness to go against his clan's creed of staying out of politics and backing CX that's troubling. The reason may morph into genuine belief in what CX can do, but initially, I think it had more to do with securing his ties to XY (he knew how important CX was to her) and bringing her closer to Qing Qui (by coming to The Middle Plains). That creed was there for a reason - to ensure the clan's independence and prosperity. And Jing, essentially just said "f*** you" to his clan all so he can ensure continued access to XY. Even if it's out of ideal, as a leader, Jing needs to think about his clan's needs, not just his own. If Jing was a modern-day CEO, he would essentially be using company assets for personal gain and placing his benefits above the company's. In the end, he dumps everything onto his "son" so he can run off with his reason for living. He's not terribly responsible this one.


 Kokuto:
And finally, can XY respect a leader who abandons his men?

Well, apparently, she can run off with them for a 'happy ending,' even if she may or may not respect him.

Haven't we already said that Xiao Yao has some very questionable behaviour and characteristics? A partner whom she can respect doesn't appear to be high on her list, as long as he always puts her first above all else, everything is a-ok. Dying for a cause is bad, dying for her is good. These two dumped everything on a young child so they could run off for part unknown at the end of the novel. Xiao Yao resented her mother for abandoning her, but she didn't hesitate to do the same thing. I guess because he wan't her child so she didn't care, because in book 1 during a conversation with CX, she stated that she would never abandoned her child. 

Is everyone offline now that I'll start posting my stuffs??