Kokuto:
she also has a cold side, created by her fear of abandonment

You know, the fandom rarely talks about this but it's true. The way she insists on dealing with her own problems instead of hiding behind others' protection. The ways she constantly tests YSQ. The way she abandons TSJ after the whole baby bomb, even after hearing TSJ's understanding of what happened (i.e., he was drugged and thought he was raped). The way she puts on a fake smile and pretends to be happy and unaffected in front of TSJ after their break up. The way she declares that she would castrate her husband if he ever had another woman. The way she nonchalantly invites TSJ to her wedding and tells him to bring his wife. 

And she's capable of being cold-hearted in other circumstances when needed. She was prepared to assassinate her uncle for ZX. When Xing Yue tries to assassinate her, the swallow she is riding starts to die mid-flight. XY doesn't hesitate to snap its neck and use its body to cushion her landing.

 nathsketch:
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/SiW4whl6egE 

Lol, yes they are super cute there.

@AH  VIP

she also has a cold side, created by her fear of abandonment

You know, the fandom rarely talks about this but it's true. The way she insists on dealing with her own problems instead of hiding behind others' protection. The ways she constantly tests YSQ. The way she abandons TSJ after the whole baby bomb, even after hearing TSJ's understanding of what happened (i.e., he was drugged and thought he was raped). The way she puts on a fake smile and pretends to be happy and unaffected in front of TSJ after their break up. The way she declares that she would castrate her husband if he ever had another woman. The way she nonchalantly invites TSJ to her wedding and tells him to bring his wife. 

And she's capable of being cold-hearted in other circumstances when needed. She was prepared to assassinate her uncle for ZX. When Xing Yue tries to assassinate her, the swallow she is riding starts to die mid-flight. XY doesn't hesitate to snap its neck and use its body to cushion her landing.


I think the casual viewer imposes the ideal on XY because she's the FL.  But she's a flawed, damaged character, and in no way perfect -- and to me, that's a good thing.  I agree, there's things she does that I think are somewhat cold.  For example, she completely cut herself off from her family in Qingshiui Town and never checked back on them.  Jing, was the one who kept an eye on them and I think actually visited them.  Heck, even XL seemed to have contact with them.

 Kokuto:
I think the casual viewer imposes the ideal on XY because she's the FL.  But she's a flawed, damaged character, and in no way perfect -- and to me, that's a good thing.  I agree, there's things she does that I think are somewhat cold.  For example, she completely cut herself off from her family in Qingshiui Town and never checked back on them.  Jing, was the one who kept an eye on them and I think actually visited them.  Heck, even XL seemed to have contact with them.

Very true.

I do not know who penned the letters the 3 male leads narrated to Xiao Yao in the Zhen Chun  videos, but I find Xiang Liu's letter the most beautiful, poignantly written, a letter he will never send except in the deepest recesses of his heart. More than just a love letter, it also represents Xiang Liu's last will to her.  Those who have read the novel will understand just how heartbreaking the line "Even if that strength hurts me" is... knowing what happened the very last time she saw him.

小 夭,展信佳:
海上又升起明月,尽管没有我们共赏的那次好看,今天我终于集齐了铸造弓箭所需的物件,海妖狡猾,鲛人凶残,但海妖丹,鲛人骨组合到一起,却能成就一把真正的好弓,你若是想用好这一把好弓,需要勤勉练习箭术,方可有力自保,届时我会托人将弓交给你,因为不想让你觉得亏欠,因为我知道你什么都想还,若真的被你还完了,你我之间怕是真的再无牵连,小 夭,我会让你有力自保,有人可依,有处可去,即使此力伤我,此人非我,此处无我,但若你能代替我好好体会这人间,足矣。 ——相柳

Xiao Yao,
I hope this letter finds you well.

The bright moon has risen over the sea again, although it is not as beautiful as the one we admired together. Today I finally gathered the items needed to forge the bow and arrows. Sea monsters are cunning, merpeople are vicious, but the combination of sea monster's core and mermaid bones can make a truly good bow. If you wish to properly utilise this bow, you must practise archery diligently to be able to have the ability to protect yourself. When the time comes, I will entrust someone to hand the bow to you, because I don't want you to feel indebted as I know you want to pay back for everything. If you really did repay me completely, I fear that there will truly be no connection left between us. 

Xiao Yao, I will give you the strength to protect yourself, someone to rely on, and a place to go. Even if that strength hurts me, that person is not me, and I do not exist in that place, if you can experience this world well on my behalf, it is enough.  

-- Xiang Liu

 liddi:
Those who have read the novel will understand just how heartbreaking the line "Even if that strength hurts me" is... knowing what happened the very last time she saw him.

</3 Yep.

Not to be too dramatic, but just reading a few words makes my heart hurt so much, as if I’ve lost a family member. I need to snap out of it

 nathsketch:

Not to be too dramatic, but just reading a few words makes my heart hurt so much, as if I’ve lost a family member. I need to snap out of it

Not too dramatic. This is a safe space for that.

It's been three weeks since I finished the drama and this story still has such a ridiculous grip on me. 

Same here. I remember tearing up when I first watched the video, and even revisiting it still leaves such an ache in my heart.

When Xiao Yao and Jing visited the shaman king in Jiu Li, the lover's bug had been planted in her for over 70 years without harming her in any way. That would not have been possible if she does not love Xiang Liu, even if she denies it vehemently to herself.  It's the what-ifs between these two that really kills me.

 AH :

Not too dramatic. This is a safe space for that.

It's been three weeks since I finished the drama and this story still has such a ridiculous grip on me. 

Yes, but you’re way stronger than me. You can see some silver linings and even appreciate the ending. I, on the other hand, need to put down the phone and actually go touch some grass. It’s embarrassing how upset this makes me.

 liddi:
When Xiao Yao and Jing visited the shaman king in Jiu Li, the lover's bug had been planted in her for over 70 years without harming her in any way. That would not have been possible if she does not love Xiang Liu, even if she denies it vehemently to herself.

Yes, when XY visits the Voodoo King in chapter 37, her bug had been in her for over 70 years already. 

A year later (in chapter 38), TSJ and XY get engaged and XY starts working on her medical texts. So over 71 years at that point. Then it takes her 42 years to complete the medical texts. Over 113 years now. 

When that project is completed in chapter 41, they visit the Grand Emperor and afterwards they plan a wedding to take place three months later. But TSJ goes missing two weeks before his wedding and stays missing for 7 years. XL kills the bugs right before TSJ returns. 

So by my count the bugs were in them for over 120 years. And they never turned into Heartbreak Bugs.

 nathsketch:

Yes, but you’re way stronger than me. You can see some silver linings and even appreciate the ending. I, on the other hand, need to put down the phone and actually go touch some grass. It’s embarrassing how upset this makes me.

Idk about stronger. But I take your point, I enjoy some of the heartache and have come to like the ending. 

 nathsketch:
I, on the other hand, need to put down the phone and actually go touch some grass.

I should probably do the same. Although it's more obsession than being upset for me, it's not terribly healthy.

@AH

Exactly.  Throughout those long years, despite her happiest moments with Jing, and later her deepest grief over losing him, the lovers bug never once turned on them. However, she was also very well shielded by Xiang Liu - never allowing her any inkling of what he is going through while taking upon himself everything of hers, except for those times when he involuntarily (the quickening heartbeat) does so.  As such, Xiao Yao is fortunate that Jing is so understanding of her when she finally could not hide her abject grief over his death anymore, because I believe he too understands that a part of her will always belong with Xiang Liu. It may not have bode so well had it been Cang Xuan with whom she ended up. 

 Noush:
On 9 heads, I probably take it like 9-tail fox form. So, XL had 9 heads and 9 lives not related, Yes? I need to know more about XL's lives, heads, and forms. AH, thanks for the clarification!

I was re-watching part of episode 11 and I can totally see why you would think that XL's nine heads were related to his nine lives.

The scene that takes place about 36 minutes into the episode is one where... they made some changes from the corresponding scene in the novel that I don't love.

But anyway, in that scene in the drama, XL says "You only have one head. You can only die once." Which totally does imply that his heads would be related to his lives. But XL doesn't say that line in the novel. I don't know why they would add it in the drama since it seems totally misleading. 

 liddi:
Exactly.  Throughout those long years, despite in her happiest moments with Jing, and later her deepest grief over losing him, the lovers bug never once turned on them.

It seems like maybe they changed this in the drama though, given the scene in episode 19?

Actually, liddi you might be able to answer a question I have. I'll transcribe part of episode 12 in my next post and include excerpts from chapter 37 and 48 that describe how the bug works and how it's planted.

If possible, could you let me know if you think any parts of the subs or the novel text should have been translated differently, or if the 2019 version of the novel uses different words? I'm curious to see if the differences are actually as significant as they seem. 

 Kokuto:
In the drama, it was time and mysterious chance, that allowed a bug stabilize, according to the old guy who XL talked to.  I'm not sure about willingness to accept the bug is a requirement.  He also uses the term affection, instead of love, for the initial planting, and to lure them out.  So maybe he means love both times?  Subtitle translations.

I was re-watching this scene from the drama. From what I gathered from their conversation, the bug had not been planted for long and had not stabilized in CX, which is why it could be transferred. 

According to the old man, planting the bug in CX required "affection" as you said. XL asks if the bugs can work if there is no love between the couple. I assume he's asking this since the bugs are successfully making CX feel XY's pain. The old man says no... but then says it's possible but it would lead to troubles and the bugs might kill the couple. XL then asks about how to remove the bugs, and the old man says the bug could be transferred if it hadn't been planted for long and wasn't stable, but it could only be transferred to someone with love in their heart. 

No mention of needing to willingly accept the bug in order for it to be successfully planted, and the rest of the old man's description has others significant differences from the description we get from the Voodoo King in chapter 37 and from XL in chapter 48. 

-----

The first part of XL's meeting with the old man is shown in episode 11. The later part of their conversation is shown in episode 12. According to the Viki subs in episode 12, they say:

"Mostly women raise them for their lovers, hoping for eternal and loyal love. Once planted, the couple will live and die together. So it's called love poisonous bug."

"If there is no love between the couple... will it still work?"

"No. No, it won't. However, the magic is mysterious and unpredictable. Perhaps it's possible. Yet, even so, it will lead to endless troubles. The couple not only can't live together, they might be killed by the poisonous bugs."

"How do you remove it?" 

"The planting of it relies on affection, and so does the removal of it. If it hasn't been planted for long, and it's not yet stable, it could possibly be transferred to another person. But this person must have love in their heart."

Parts of the old man's words are repeated in episode 19 when XL watches TSJ carry XY across the beach and the bugs appear to cause his heart pain, and he seems to need to use his power to suppress the effects. Again, very different from the novel... because that scene isn't in the novel at all.  

-----

Chapter 37:

The Voodoo King coughed once and solemnly explained, “Lover’s Bug, like its name indicates, is a pair of male-female voodoo bugs. The couple who has the bug successfully planted will have their life and emotions connected....

It can lead two people to be connected in life and emotions but it is just like a pair of lovers in love with each other. It is temperamental and hard to control. If the Lover’s Bug turns on each other, then both people will die. Which is why the Lover’s Bug also has another name, the Heartbreak Bug.”

... “It really is a Lover’s Bug! But how is this possible? ‘Lovers who raise the bug produce the Lover’s Bug, Not Lovers who raise the bug produce the Heartbreak Bug.’ The Lover’s Bug is different from other voodoo bugs and absolutely requires the couple to willingly accept the bug for it to be successfully planted. If the man you successfully planted the other bug in is not your lover, then how did you plant it in him?”

...

The Voodoo King was still perplexed. But it was clear that the young man sitting beside Xiao Yao was clearly her beloved so the rest of what he wanted to say wasn’t suitable for discussing at this time. 

...

Xiao Yao smiled at him and made a joke face. “Don’t worry! We don’t need to believe everything the Voodoo King says. Don’t forget, he said that only in a pair of lovers in love could the bug be successfully planted. I don’t have any relationship with Xiang Liu, but we still successfully planted the bug...

-----

Chapter 48:

Xiang Liu sat down next to the raft and stared at the sleeping Xiao Yao before softly saying, “The tree grows old on land together, the mandarin ducks die together in the water – the Lover’s Bug connects heart to heart and our lives, and there truly is no way to remove the bug. Years ago I was only able to remove the bug from Zhuan Xu because he didn’t know it was you so he didn’t willingly accept the bug. So you never successfully planted the bug on him in the first place. But I….I was heart and soul willing, so the bug successfully planted in me...”