Lost You Forever (2023)

The One Who Can Stay With Her Forever

The chemistry of all the three male leads with Xiaoyao begins with... "because I was once all alone and abandoned and you stayed with me. And even if the world hates my dark side, is after my royal position, you like me for me..." Be it Cang Xuan or Tushan Jing or Xiang Liu, all three first found a great companion in Xiaoyao for their loneliness. While Xiaoyao herself, was on the search of someone who would accompany her till the end.

Lost You forever is a compelling, intriguing narrative spanning over hundreds of years set in kingdom Dahuang where deities are struggling over power and these ambitious or least-interested-in-power characters are struggling to stay alive or do as they like among the harsh palace and wordly walls.

Half of the plot is about how these main characters have merely one percent control over there own lives and that's what made them selfish, desperate and cold. Ngl their struggles never end and no single soul has happiness in the whole Dahuang. More than liking or hate I've a truckload of pity for them... The male protagonists only see the leading lady Xiaoyao as their light of hope and Xiaoyao who is almost numb to the world, sceptical, she wants a man who can be kind to her forever without breaking her heart or promises... the rest half plot is about some fast paced politics where Cang Xuan is trying to make a name for himself.

Lost you forever has to be the most fast paced, polished, top tier production quality palace drama I've watched this year. The direction and acting are worthy of praises. Tbh I was reluctant to start this earlier but Yang Zi's performance here surprised me eminently. Scattered scenes like her visiting her father in Haoling after long, getting injured by thousands of incoming petals and her staring at stairs looking back at what she has been through, all these scenes made me as heartbroken as she was. Would dare to say that this might be her best work as an actress where she got to show her range in her craft.

Being a historical where female lead stays as a 'Male' for half of the drama, Yang Zi was far impressive in her part. her Wen Xiao Liu was so convincing that it took me some episodes to digest that she's a woman now. I often saw a man in her face after she transformed xDDD... But this was the reason Xiaoyao got along well with all four male leads in the first place (expect Fenglong who fell at first sight for her feminine side, but he later admitted how comfortable he was with her as a buddy indicating that he also liked her straightforward cool-bro nature)

Let me introduce you to the options, Princess of Haoling, Haoling Jiu Yao (Xiaoyao) has —

1. Cang Xuan (I'm far ambitious but I'm doing this so that I'm powerful enough to protect her. I'm so in love with her that I don't mind being her brother for life if I get to stay by her side)... Zhang Wanyi has crazy eyes that have accurate longing and helplessness this complex role needs. He's both a psycho and a heartwarming brother favored by ladies. He was so impressive that I kinda want him in more darker roles in future.

2. Tushan Jing (I like her but I'm also too kind, I'm good at strategies but I still fail in life becoz I'm too gentle for this world)... Deng Wei's face suits the nice male lead trope but he felt a bit off in some scenes. Maybe its about experience that he will gain slowly, even so he was good. his chemistry with FL is all mushy and cute type where they talk and paint and I'm blushing hahaha

3. Xiang Liu (yes I'm that white haired guy most of you were swooning over. I would kill and not kill for her. I wander the world in white robes but go back to tease or bite her once every episode)... Picking Tan Jianci for Xiang Liu is epic!!!!!!!! (He looks great( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)) He's scheming, maybe an extremist but damnnn his deep talks, nonsense bickering, drowning in water has hell lot of chemistry with Xiaoyao.

4. Chishui Fenglong (I met her late but I've power I can promise to stay with her for longer so who knows?)... In front of the three above, he obviously seemed less charming and like a supporting character instead but I'm excited to see his growth in S2.

While almost all the viewers have already picked up their ships and started rooting for them, I'm more like Xiaoyao and just enjoying it with the flow lol (maybe I'm heartless too :))... I was once all into Jing's puppy love, then I got swayed by TCJ's Xiang Liu and now I'm not choosing anymore haha. Just excited for season 2 and can they please release it tomorrow? Like waiting for 6 months means I'll lose this emotional build up I've for this drama right now.

The song I loved the most from the huge OST list has to be the theme song ♪Nothing Can Be Compared to You♪ (万物不如你) sung by Zhang Jie.

To sum it up, lost you forever is an addictive, thought provoking, melancholic romantic historical that keeps you entertained for sure. The exceptional setup and dramatic music is something you get in handy.

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The Princess Bride.

Lost You Forever is a dark, beautiful, suspenseful and, poignant tale of intrigue, treachery and longing. This drama is immersive with its air of mystery, the shiver of danger, a whisper of regret and a sense of profound loss and longing that saturates every scene. It is a story about love but it is not a love story. It is a far more complex and expansive exposition of the many kinds of love and how it can be restraining and boundless at the same time.

Set in Dahuang, a magical, treacherous and unpredictable world where humans, demons and deities co-exist, two forsaken royal orphans vow to always cherish and protect one another. Shattered by a broken promise, Xiao Yao loses herself, misplaced during a time of great turmoil. She assumes the appearance of a man and lives among the humans and demons of Qingshui Town as the village fertility doctor. This is the most exciting arc because everyone has secrets and danger lurks around every corner. When cornered, Xiao Yao is most adept at grovellng, lying or poisoning her way out of trouble. Yet she is carefree, uninhibited and almost contented in Qingshui Town with her found family. Alas, destiny catches up with her as Cang Xuan, Tushan Jing and Xiang Liu all converge upon Qingshui Town, shattering her refuge.

The latter arcs take on a political tone as Cang Xuan emerges as a contender for the Xiyan throne with Xiao Yao clearing the path for him. They must establish Cang Xuan's support base among the restless and resentful Central Plains; where the noble clans and families have complicated blood ties to remnants of the defeated Chenrong state. Xiao Yao is the princess bride, a chess piece that Cang Xuan dangles temptingly in front of the scions of the powerful aristocratic families he seeks to win over. Marriage to him is simply a means to seal alliances. He supresses his heart's deepest, secret longing by sheer willpower. Zhang Wanyi adroitly portrays Cang Xuan as a consummate politician, a very dangerous, smiling tiger / xiàomiànhǔ 笑面虎 who has his enemies in a death lock before they even know it. Love is not of paramount importance for Cang Xuan and Xiao Yao, whose destinies are interlocking as a result of their childhood oath. They work towards a greater purpose with one heart and one mind. Anyone and everyone else is always subordinated to this purpose. They are both unattainable characters who have already carved out so much of themselves for each other that there is not much left for anyone else. This is why what Xiao Yao seeks is an unequal relationship with essentially, a doormat. The princess in her however prefers that it is a doormat made of fox fur rather than a rather foolish, entitled product of too much in-breeding.

Xiao Yao is by far the darkest, most complicated, and most independent female protagonist I have come across in Chinese dramas. This is an awesome and challenging role that Yang Zi delivers magnificently. As someone who had a huge allergic reaction to her earlier works, I am speechless at her portrayal. Her Wei Xiaoliu has decisively unseated Ni Ni's Fang Weizhi as the most convincingly acted female disguised as a male character. But it is her heart-wrenching homecoming scene that can squeeze tears from a rock that truly captures the depth of Xiao Yao's sense of abandonment and despair over the person she lost forever. I can't think of another actor that has so visibly taken their acting to a high a new level the way Yang Zi has. That said, no power on this earth will make me revisit her past roles though I enthusiastically look forward to her future ones.

Tushan Jing is the weakest link in this drama both in terms of how the character is written and portrayed. Despite his stunning physical appeal, this is not a role that a promising but inexperienced actor like Deng Wei is ready for. He pulls off a charismatic and endearing Ye Shiqi that melted Wei Xiaoliu's stone-cold and lonely heart. But he lacks depth and range and visibly struggles to get into character as Tushan Jing. His perpetual stricken, deer-in-the headlight expression threw me out of some of the drama's best, most intense moments. When the Haoling King assures his daughter that the shrewd and canny Tushan Jing must have already guessed her identity, the camera pans to a dumbfounded looking Tushan Jing! I burst out laughing even though I am absolutely sure I was not supposed to. It does not help that the character's weak and indecisive waffling does not match Tushan Jing's reputation as one of the most brilliant and cunning minds of Dahuang. There is clearly also a writing issue but it does not excuse the actor's inability to make the character seem deeply conflicted rather than just weak and lacking basic smarts and survival instincts. This is a glaring weakness that weighs on both my viewing experience and my rating.

Xiang Liu is Xiao Yao's greatest nightmare, a demon that she is bonded to by a spell no one fully grasps. He is her soul mate; they are both lonely, realistic characters trapped by a cause that is bigger than themselves and thus have no free will. Tan Jianci's masterful, subtly tragic rendering of this vicious, resentful and enigmatic nine-headed demon with a shockingly passionate heart has catapulted this fantastic actor to a new level recognition. His styling is spectacular but what takes my breath away is how with the angle of the head or a flicker of an eye, his expression can change from unholy amusement to vicious cruelty; from tortured to pure, unbridled joy and affection. I don't know how Xiang Liu's story ends but the fact that he is committed to a lost cause that pits him against the person Xiao Yao protects at all costs fills me with dread. I cannot see any scenario in which this ship does not somehow sink but my heart won't listen to my head that urges me to get on the lifeboat to safety before it is too late.

Season 1 sets up the backstory of a world torn apart by war and introduces many well-written and multi-faceted characters that were collateral damage in the conflict. Intricate relationships and debts that will at some point come due accumulate between the various stakeholders. After some draggy politicking, Season 1 ends triumphantly with an unexpected twist and sets the stage very nicely for Season 2. I expect Season 2 to reveal even more secrets from the past that will force Xiao Yao to make some impossible choices. How unbreakable is her bond with Cang Xuan? Will the tragic story of Chi Chen and the Xiling witch repeat itself? Will Deng Wei finally get his act together and give us the real Tushan Jing? Will Xiao Yao shock us with her marksmanship by shooting her rival in her black heart? I hope we will not have to wait too long to find out. At the same time, I am grateful that this breaks in a good place for a time out. I have come to care too much for these characters and something tells me that this is the kind of story where even those who get what they want may not truly want what they get.

So far, Lost You Forever is the most addictive and immersive drama I have watched in 2023. I rate this a 9.0 for now because there are some notable flaws but if Season 2 comes together well, there is scope for me to revise it up.

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Can't wait for season 2

I am someone who has little faith in Xianxia genre. Most of the time they ruin the whole story with unnecessary fillers if it's an adaptation. Plus they change the major part of the story that ends up into a cliched, stupid and predictable storyline. Another thing is annoying stupid female that we usually find in such dramas. And the most important part- Rushed ending!!!!

What I loved:
- WHAT A CAST. No over the top acting. ( Special mention for kids). Yangzi killed it with her acting skills here. The actor who play Cang Xuan, man he might not be my favourite character but his acting and the subtle emotions that he portrayed throughout the show is undoubtedly the best. What an amazing actor. Another special mention is for the grandpa. What an outstanding character. Every actor from a maid to all the rulers and side characters behaved like the real person not just some extras.
-Female lead is not annoying ( was not a fan of Yangzi as I have always seen her in bubbly, hyper and stupid girl sort of role.) I didn't know she will become one of my favourites.
- Finally all of them have their own voices. (No dubbing).
-Loved the songs especially the one sung by the actress herself. Background music just adds more beauty to the fantasy world of this drama.
-Only few episodes and you won't be able to stop yourself from watching. The story is really good and connects you right away with the characters.
- Three male leads are there and believe me you will find it hard to choose a favourite. All of them acted so well that you just can't ignore their presence.
- Set design, costumes and overall production is really good. CGI is...okay in some scenes but they utilised the money at the right place and those scenes looked mesmerizing. It again proves that an amazing director can bring so much out from the actors and made sure people could connect to the characters.
I was planning to read the novel (if I could find it somewhere) but it is good I went into it without prior knowledge about the novel. I can't believe we all have to wait for a long time for season 2. But this season satisfyed my thrust for an amazing well paced, edited and acted Xianxia drama. It deserves all the praise. :)

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THE MOST CAPTIVATING ACTING PERFORMANCE EVER

I have always longed for a wuxia drama with a sensible, strong and relatable female lead and LYF gave me a 10 over 10. I cried so much, smiled so much when things got better and loved it so much!!! This should be ranked less than #100 in MDL. Hope the rating goes up. Excellent acting performance from the 4 main leads! Too beautiful and easily the best drama I watched...no cap. Cant wait for season 2

A standing ovation for Yang Zi for the awesome acting, not many can pull off such performance. I have always loved actresses who are not just pretty but able to act and embody emotions because at the end of the day you can buy yourself a pretty face( don't mean in a bad way) but you can't buy creative acting skills (it takes hard work or natural talent)

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stellar performance ✨️

I have started this drama only because it is currently 'the talk of the town', a highly invested and budgeted drama, But i then decided to continue for many reasons:.

Differently from other dramas where the connection with the characters normally gets me after 2-3 episodes, this one found a connection straight away, with the stellar performance of the FL whom i knew from Ashes of love, but which character didn't impressed me that much.
On this drama, Yang Zi delivers a courageous performance, perfectly cross dressing in a believable male role. Never afraid to look normal, not pretty in many scenes, BRAVO! She is one of the reasons i decided to continue.

The male leads surrounding her are each of then unique and are giving our FL different emotional and physical experiences, you have the brother, the 'puppy' kind of love offering warmth, the challenger abusive potential lover... i wish i was her to have them for me 😁😁

The characters have all gone through some sort of abuse, loneliness, and are mostly unloved .. and you might find the drama difficult to watch at times as very raw and painful.. but if you are able to digest those scenes, you will be rewarded and taken deeply into their world...

Some of the strong scenes were linked to the character that had taken my breath, heart and reasons away .. but i didn't have a say on this choice as... yes... i have a weak spot for white/silver haired man.... 😁😉

you might decide to drop drama as i did myself as i thought I couldn't bear to continue watching it.. but it then took me less than a day to get back at it because i actually couldn't bear to be without it! The irony...

If interested, it would help you to understand the reasons behind many events if you are able to get your hand on the novel this drama is based on. On My Drama List website, there is a discussion forum with links to the novel and further discussions and readings from the books.

A final Bravo to the whole team behind production! This drama is well constructed, with an interesting plot and characters developments.

Thank you!

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There was once a girl who lost her way

Anyone can look at my drama list count and know there is a slight obsessive trait towards Asian dramas. I'm an American who cut cable in 2014 and didn't miss a beat because I discovered the storylines from Korean and Chinese dramas offered a solid story line versus the gratuitous sex scenes in American television, which often times made no sense to the plot. As such, there are times of preoccupation with these dramas, and "Lost You Forever" is definitely one that I rewatch daily.

This drama was lucky and shrewd enough to hire the original author as a screenwriter, and it made this story absolutely rich in detail and pacing. Not once did I hit the fast forward button, and many times, a rediscovery of rewind and repeat was used throughout each of the 39 episodes. Because of my obsession, I found the English translation of the original work, read it in three days, and cried through the last ten chapters. Life is full of choices, loss, betrayal, and love, and this novel allowed each of the main characters to display every human trait to the fullest. If given a chance, please read it because the character's silent voice in the drama helped explain some of their decisions.

The actors in the drama are immersed in their characters, and this allowed me to dive into their world without interruption. The multi-faceted Xiao Yao who feared abandonment; the fierce Xiyan Cang Xuan who was schooled to assume power at the cost of his personal happiness; the gentle and cunning Tushan Jing who longs to escape his clan responsibility while clinging to an ever-fading hope of forever with Xiao Yao; and lastly, the beautiful Xiang Liu, who discovers clinging to the emotion of love is a war with indebted duty.

Needless to say, I cannot wait for part 2, but am watching part 1 daily and picking up details I missed during the first go around. This drama is a masterpiece, and I hope this continues in the sequel.

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Beautiful cinematography ; remarkable acting and such a pleasure to watch

I ventured upon LYF while waiting on new episodes for another drama - with the result of completely dropping the other drama to rewatch LYF obsessively when it wasn't updating. I had expected just another popular xianxia romance that are dropped a dime a dozen these days in C-drama land but instead was blown away with the quality of the production. The story was good but didn't seem too special to me - with common themes of ambition, family, love, and kindness. However, the ensemble performance of the actors along with the beautiful artistry in the setting and the captivating screenwriting really captured me. In general, the casting was superb - and every role was likable. The sheer beauty of each frame also just blew me away - I usually skip about half of each C-drama I watch as they are usually slow and draggy- LFY is still slow - but it was such a pleasure to slow down with it to savor the beauty of each scene - the beauty of the set combined with the costumes and the charisma of the actors. This was an ensemble casting with the romance line drawn mainly between the FL and the second and third ML who both had backgrounds in dancing. I think this paid off hugely in the artistry of each scene - the actors' silhouettes gracing the beautiful landscape surreally leaving us mortals sighing at the Chinese mystical fairyland.

Story - This is a story that is steeped in Confucian culture- the world illustrated is quite traditional but with wisps of modernity - a world where women are allowed to be generals (such as the FL's mother) ; bodyguards; can do anything (even fight or make weapons!) as well as men - and are yet mostly still shut out of the top of the political economic structure. Harems are the norm ( I find it ironic that it is always the case in a 'reverse harem' story) and filial piety and tribalism rules the day. It seems that this is based on the common acknowledged social structure and the men's inter personal relations. Yet, in a world like this, the FL wishes to be able to stand on her own and not get hurt emotionally. Her one rule in marriage: that the guy must be solely devoted to her and not have any other women, seems impossible again and again to fulfill - it competes against manly ambitions; against loyalty/nationalism ; even against family interests. For people familiar with Chinese culture, many scenes in the movie are reminiscent to me a bit of the Story of the Red Chamber - with TSJ (2nd ML) especially having both the look and feel of Jia Baoyu - tragic, sensitive, almost feminine. In the original book, the take and illustration of TSJ's kindness and refusal to give in to hate and revenge is rather controversial with many readers seeing him as weak, and siding instead with the heroic Xiang Liu. The drama's stance feels more on TSJ's side - and the portrayal is quite masterful. Many details added in the drama enrich the original story and I'd go to say that this is the one rare occasion where the drama is at least as good, if not even better, than the novel.

Acting- I am blown away by the ensemble cast. Yang Zi was predictably good here but it was great to see that the five relatively unknown actors paired with her sometimes actually outshine her. The fresh faces are exciting to see and one hopes to see their careers develop over the next few years. Scenes featuring YZ and Zhangwanyi emphasize their skills in acting - YZ and TJC have a mystical romantic feel and the DW/YZ interactions are pure eye candy. I didn't have to fast forward any scenes on the first go. On my second viewing, I found myself mostly focused on scenes with Deng Wei and especially the Yao Jing or Liu/Shiqi scenes. Given DW's relative newcome status, I thought at first that was because of the characterization of his character and how likable it is. By the end of the 39 episodes, however, I have to say his acting was actually solid. Details were handled very precisely and I've never seen any character suffer so beautifully. DW really embodied TSJ/YSQ - given how green he is, I hope he can continue to develop his skills and bring us more productions in the future.

Music - as in many C-dramas I think they use and repeat the music way too much but the tunes are nice and beautiful. The novel emphasized the use of the zither and how beautifully TSJ can play it - I wish the drama did better with that. Given how classy the rest of the drama feels, it would have really been nice to really use zither music than modern ones. But at least it all sounds pretty good and catchy.

Cinematography - I was blown away with how beautiful the scenes were and even the CGI didn't feel fake! Many times I get annoyed at the use of cute little animals in xianxia c-drama as cheap tricks for little girls but I admit actually falling for both the Chubby bird and the White Fox spirit. I'm happy the producers didn't feel adding the cuteness dragged the artistry of the production down and it was nice to see a xianxia production that actually felt serious and classy.

Last take - Yang Zi has been a queen of xianxia ever since AOL was released. I think this is the best production yet she's in. It is worth all the angst and time and express pass money spent on it to watch and savor. I do think it is time for Yang Zi to move onto another genre but for now I am grateful for this production and of her leading the whole cast in making this drama memorable.

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Melancholic, contemplative and sublime

RATING: 9.25/10

Lost You Forever was not one of my most highly anticipated shows this year. After all, four men after one woman didn’t sound like a convincing enough reason to watch a show. But thankfully, the trailer of this show really drew me in and I’m glad I went on this ride.

I have to admit - this is one of the best shows released so far this year. The first episode had me in tears, and logically there’s no reason to cry during the first episode of any show - because you don’t know characters well enough to care for them so much. But it was touching and mournful and it immediately felt like a special show.

What makes LYF really stand out is its contemplative approach. It is extremely slow, but never draggy. It builds a convincing world with interesting characters, all with their own stories and traumas. Our four leads have rich histories and have lived for hundreds of years. I like how this aspect is not brushed aside, but is actually fleshed out. For one, they feel mature and world-wise. In the case of Xiaoyao, the abandonment she experienced multiple times in life makes her hesitant to hope for things. Cang Xuan losing his parents tragically at such an early age forces him to grow up fast and pushes him to want to protect those he loves. Tushan Jing is the embodiment of forgiveness and kindness that in spite of suffering so much, he never seeks revenge. Xiang Liu is bound to his benefactor and has his own tragic backstory, but always cares for Xiaoyao secretly and from afar, without seeking rewards. Although it may seem like LYF is a romance show, it is not. Every character exists for things other than love, but love definitely connects everyone. This show has all forms of love present in it, which at many times transcend romantic and physical love.

These are some of the things I love on this show:

CASTING: I have to say that all actors are exceptionally talented and perfect for their roles. This was my first time watching Yang Zi in a full production (I’d only seen her for a short while on another show), but also my first time watching Zhang Wan Yi. I’ve seen both Deng Wei and Tan Jianci before (albeit in minor roles). Everyone has done a stellar job, including supporting actors. There’s no fault I can pick here and I look forward to watching all these actors in their future projects. It is because of their amazing performances here that it has been so easy to cry. I also need to mention the child actors who played Cang Xuan and Xiaoyao in the first episode - they were so amazing!

MUSIC: I have to give a special mention to the music in the series. The songs are beautiful and inserted at the right moments. I also did not expect Tan Jianci to sing so well, so that was a pleasant surprise. Other than that, the instrumental score is phenomenal and elevates the show and the emotional core of the show. I’ve been listening to the soundtrack on loop and it immediately transports me back to the show.

THE WORLD BUILDING: Because the show takes a very slow approach to storytelling, the world feels very well-fleshed out. It feels like an alternate universe with its own unique rules. At the same time, it feels lived-in and realistic. This is hard to achieve for many shows and I commend LYF for doing this so well. Can I also mention the cute fictional animals like feifei (poor thing), as well as Chubby and TSJ’s white fox - they’re all so adorable.

EMOTIONAL AND PHILOSOPHICAL DEPTH: I have lost count of how many tears I have shed watching this show. I think there are some very small, seemingly insignificant moments that are given so much emotional depth. Also, because characters are so well developed, it is easy to see the bonds between them and be emotionally invested. One of the aspects I appreciate most about the show is how the seemingly unimportant interactions between characters reveal so much about the characters themselves. It is quite difficult to achieve such a balance, but LYF nails this wonderfully. Furthermore, the show asks a lot of philosophical questions about life and the nature of existence. I really appreciate that approach.

All in all, I don’t have anything bad to say as such. I think seeing Xiaoliu/Xiaoyao being tortured many times during the first several episodes made the show very difficult to watch. Not my favourite bits. Similarly, Jing being trapped with Yiying because of a long-winded plan hatched by his grandmother, Yiying and Hou is not my favourite story arc. Jing’s grandmother, Yiying and Hou truly suck.

Now I’m waiting impatiently for Season 2 like everyone else.

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Best Xianxia I ever watched

I never wrote a review before so bear with me.

Lost you forever is the most grounded xianxia I have seen in a long time. yes there are demons, nine tailed foxes and winged beasts but the drama, the politics, the emotions and the relationships are rooted in realism and complexity. The fantasy element is here to create wonder and an esthetically pleasing atmosphere as opposed to centering the story.

The story seldom uses genre tropes and when it does , it is successful at it. The FL here starts in the body of a man something that is never believable in so many other dramas. But here, Yang Zi delivers the most realistic "woman disguized as a man" role yet. The actress is allowed to look rugged and unglamourous, not using that hideous orange eye makeup and lipgloss. she has unassuming mannerisms and straightforward voice.
After her gender was revealed, she assumes her feminity but doesn't abandon her nonchalant attitude and priorities. for example, medecine and poison making.
The MLs(we have 4) are incredibly different and multilayered :
The 1st ML played beautifully by Zhang Wan Yi in what could only be described as a breakout role, is a politican first and foremost. He isn't aversed to using everyone including the FL for his endgame. The FL sees him as a brother and considers him the most important person in her life.
The 2nd ML : is the romantic interest, The most broken character that got a second chance at life thanks to the FL. He is smart, wealthy and savvy but because of his suffering doesn't care about material possessions and channels his means to help the FL and the 1st ML.
The 3rd ML: a demon who has 9 lives . uses the FL at first for her blood that possesses healing abilities but comes to love her and protect her later on.
the 4th ML: a good natured but ambitious politician who wishes to become his clan leader by allying with the 1st ML and marrying the FL.

I personally fell in love with the second ML for his gentleness and devotion to the FL and was happy to realize he would be endgame early on. Breaking again with the norms established within similar stories.

I also loved the complexity of the 1st ML. Rarely do we get a central character willing to do what he does.


So yes , this was a very enjoyable ride for me and I can't wait for the second season to wrap it all up.

Overall a 10/10 for me.

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A great story that has an underlying message, "Sometimes, we don't deserve to have good things."

In the beginning, the story folded out very well. All of the characters have some kind of potential and brought lots of joys to the drama. Each character added a unique emotion to their scenes. Watching it, we can see the efforts put into this drama by Yangzi, WY, TJC, and DW. In the first 10 episodes, Yangzi holds the drama with her stellar acting. We felt all kinds of emotions. As the drama unfolded, Cang Xuan and Deng wei took 11 to 20 episodes on their back with their amazing performances. Epi 21 to 26 Tan Jianci stole our hearts and attention. When the romance between Jing and XY starts, I feel like that drama went downhill from there up until XL appears again to save XY 30 to 32. After that, the drama pretty much went downhill. Only watchable when XL appeared. Some people will understand why while others will not. It's ok. Just my opinion.

Characters Wise:
In the beginning, Xiao Yao was independent. She didn't need any man in her life to complete her. However, after she became a princess, her character development went from a mature woman to a jealous girl in love. However, that is not the case with all of the male leads. She is very smart FL but when it comes to her love's life, she is clueless and dense.
CX - XY is mature, understanding, supportive
TSJ-XY is sometimes immature and jealous, going back and forth with TSJ's Fiancee issue.
XL-XY is mature, understanding on a deep level, heart-to-heart conversation, deep emotions
Cang Xuan - XY and CX got two of the purest, family loves that have ever been portrayed in Drama Land. They got each other back and will be ready to die for each other. However, throughout this ordeal, CX has to keep his one-sided love to himself due to his goal to protect Xy by becoming the King of Xiyan. Throughout this journey, he has used XY for his political gain but has also protected her along the way. Along the way, he has some character development. He went from being an overprotective brother to an understanding brother. Unfortunately, he will lose XY due to his yearning for XY's loves.
TSJ - TSJ is one of the kindest, purest men but has no backbone which becomes his weakness in the future. He is attentive but sometimes, that attentiveness is overdone. Imagine a guy asking you to go meet him and when you don't, he stays there until you feel bad enough to show up. In addition, locking down XY with a 15-year promise when he hasn't sorted out his Fiancee issues and continues for many more episodes. Also, his chemistry with XY as Shiqi was strong but once he become TSJ, he became weaker, and his chemistry with XY, for me, just kind of appeared boring from Epi 26-28 due to him never sorting out his Fiancee issue. Like come on dude, you have 39 episodes to sort out your life.
Xiang Liu - is my biased but I won't go into detail about why I love him. After episode 32, I cannot watch other people's scenes anymore. I skipped and watch XL's scenes because his scenes always make me cry and smile like an idiot. I get it. Although he has the bad boy aura, he is truly a person who is straightforward, goal-orientated, and knows what he wants-cleaning up XY and Jing's messes for them. Although he did some unforgivable things to the female, he also repaid her back with more than what he did to her: taking the love bug, giving XY his life twice, and saving Jing from death so XY and Jing can have a happy ending. His character development was one of the greatest, most complex characters created since AOL and 1000P.
As you reach Epi 32, you will start to understand why the title is so sad. However, XY and Jing deserved each other. I am glad XL will get the result that he has since the beginning till now. Sometimes, a happy ending is realizing your dreams.


Spoilers:

What pisses me off after I got to epi 32?
Everyone fighting about who deserves XY but did anyone observe whether XY deserve them?
In my opinion, XY is selfish, indecisive, weak, reliant, and not as independent as the beginning XY before she met all of them. Her character development turns for the worse.
She and Jing truly deserved each other. I am glad that they will kill XL after all the shit that he has done and will be doing for both of these two weak characters.
At this point, I am so done with this drama. Xiang Liu and Cangxuan are the only two characters holding this drama together. Without their presence, it is probably just another weak romance story.
I'm glad the author put the title "Lost You Forever" with regret and the possibility of what could have been. The author realized that sometimes, we don't deserve good things. Although some said the title is for CangXuan and XY, but I disagree. The title is for all of the main characters. Although it is a HE for XY and Jing, only a sad title is what they both deserved. Just my opinion.

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I am in Love with this drama

This drama really is the best cdrama I have seen besides the Untamed (nothing will top that haha). Everything about it is just so good. You have really pretty people on screen. The costumes are fantastic.

The build-up, the slow burn, everything just runs very smoothly. Nothing drags on. We already have some very iconic scenes in the drama and we aren’t even halfway done yet.

Casting/Characters: This is Yang Zi’s best role so far. I am so happy that she chose this role. With Xiaoluo/xiaoyao we finally get to see Yang Zi act to her full potential. In Ashes of Love and Immortal Samsara her roles start off with being some sort of diety, I think like a pea or fish or something, and she starts off pretty annoying. Her voice is all high-pitched and chipper, and acting wise, she acts very young, I am sure she is portaying a very young character, but whatever, what I am trying to say is that she played these very stereotypical, annoying female lead protagonists. The one that you see in just about every fantasy xianxia drama these days. Nothing new, and nothing spectacular. But here, she is a women in hiding as a man. She clearly went through some very traumatic events, and although we don’t know exactly why, this brings lots of depth to her character, and we see her react to certain situations in a specific way because of her past traumas. She gets put through the wringer time and time again and my gosh, can this women act. She is just so good. I love all of the MLs. I had never watched any show with them in it before and they all steal the show in their own way. They are all very different from each other and are not too tropey. Every character is likable, I like every ML so far. You have one who is perfect, one who is flawed, but has his reasons, the evil brooding bad boy, and the good2shoes royal family one. I just love it.

Story: The story seems to be pretty unique. It is centered around the FL and it is basically about her living in the world around her and meeting characters who change her world and how she reacts to that. That is what I will say so I don't spoil the show.

(spoilers) Episode 16 or 17 her past cousin finally finds out who she is. I love how we didn’t have to wait for the whole show for him to find out, and the way he finds out is perfect. It is different from what I would have expected. It is unpredictable, and I think what I like most about this show is how unpredictable it is. These days with dramas, since they are popped out just about every other week, the stories become bland and very predictable. And then when he finds out the whole section of the episode where he is going over every event they had been through and how poorly he treated her and her saving him and finally realizing, like yes, it had been a little obvious… its just so good. He goes to her and helps to heal her leg which he broke, the acting of this man, mmmmmmm it is perfect. Go watch the scene, he goes to the room, so blank and heals her leg, and the first thing he says is very soft, he asks if her legs hurt and looks at her in a way which you cannot deny, he found pout and that is when her reaction changes too, from brushing it off to knowing that he found out and oooo its good. Then when she finally admits to being his sister, when she thinks her mom came back. OMG is it good? It is too good, the voice acting, the performance, it is so heart-wrenching I just :((((((((. (end of spoilers)

Music: The music is so pretty in this show. They don't play music throughout the whole show which is very appreciated. The music helps to tell the story and set the mood, it really adds to the scene. The first ending song is my favorite. I seriously cried after the first episode when it started playing.

Update: I have watched around 20ish episodes now and the story only keeps getting better. You know a cdrama is good when you are questioning if all the 50ish episodes will tell the whole story or not. We see Xiaoyao as herself in her true form and how she adapts to the new world around her. I like how the drama doesn't change her character entirely, she still acts how she used too and has trouble living in the palace. The MLs are all starting to compete for her and it is a treat to watch. I love all of the MLs, I would not be mad if any of them got with her; they are all so swoonworthy. I used to have a favorite, but not anymore haha.

Last update: I love how many plot twists this show has. Seriously, the plot twists are very unpredictable and I really enjoy them; they make the show very entertaining. My pick for her for which ML she should be with kept changing. I love it! Can't wait for season 2!

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The plot lost between the simping, stalking and the sea of angst.

This drama makes me confused. Logically, I don’t even think it’s that good. Sure, some characters are interesting, some have great arcs, but the overall plot was barely developed and it’s mostly the female lead bouncing between the three and half male leads (I’m sorry Feng Long, but I forgot you were even a legit option and actually part of the main cast).

That said, it’s ridiculously addicting and entertaining. I saw all the flaws, but I could not stop watching. I feel like it’s one of the dramas with well written characters and basic, underdeveloped plot. Xiao Yao had barely anything going on for her in terms of the story, but just her personality and her interactions with other characters were enough for me to adore her. Xiyan Cang Xuan's fight for the throne seemed more like a first draft than a proper strategy, and yet I love him and the internal struggle, suppressed emotions and the conflicts he had to face were amazing. Xiang Liu had some of the best character developments in the whole show, slow, well paced, realistic. He did not become an angel, the core of the character never changed, but with each and every scene we’ve got to see all the layers of personalities he had.

While I disliked Tushan Jing a lot, even his character was written in a proper way, I just don’t vibe with him. That said, the struggle between his own desires and the newly found responsibilities was well presented.

Another aspect deserving some appreciation was the variety of female characters. More straightforward and tomboyish Xiao Yao, who is truly daring and loyal. Nian who went from annoying brat, to sweet sister (whom I also adored by the end of the show - biggest surprise for me), Fangfeng Yi Ying with her cunning nature and desperate actions, calculative, but also honest Chenrong Xin Yue. Truth to be told, I appreciated all the female characters, and at times I wished the drama would focus on them more.

What’s more to love? The visuals. Not me taking over 1000 screenshots. The costumes were beautiful, the scenery breathtaking, set designs amazing. Visually speaking, there was nothing to hate and a lot to love.

The acting was great. The only performance I struggle to judge is Deng Wei as Tushan Jing - I disliked the character so much, I am not going to act like a clown and pretend like I can be objective here. That said, the whole cast MASTERED the suppressed angst - everyone delivered in that area and these scenes were truly the highlight of the whole drama for me.

Overall, extremely enjoyable watch, even if by the end I felt like there was barely any plot. I wanted to see more detail in Xiyan Cang Xuan journey. I also wished to see more of Nian, since she became one of my favorite characters. I disliked how unbalanced all the relationships were, as someone who prefers partnership, the simping and pinning, and sacrificing at times was too much - rolling eyes was inevitable.

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