I'm well aware of Korea's shortcomings and problems, although I've learned to appreciate some of them that I hated at first. I'm also painfully aware that I won't be accepted as a Korean even if I'm fluent in the language, fully immersed in the culture, married to a Korean and have been living there for 30 years. I'll always be seen as a foreigner. And I'm okay with that, after all is what kept safe the strong cultural identity.
But I still romanticize how would be my first time there (I can't help it). Not because it's a perfect paradise, but because I've been longing forever. Just like water tastes like heaven when you're thirsty. I want that feeling that "I'm here!" and finally get to experience what I've been dying for. I want to spend a night at Namsan Tower, a full weekend at some isolated hanok village, eat traditional Korean food made by a grandma and listen to all her stories of when she was young. It's a very personal fantasy, nothing to do with the perfectness of the country.
It's a bit like the difference between passion and love. One ignores the existence of flaws, the other embrace those flaws as part of what makes someone special.
