Tushan Jing and Xiao Yao's romance

YaoJing (21-39)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dcLR8TEImVQ&ab_channel=%E8%85%BE%E8%AE%AF%E8%A7%86%E9%A2%91

 cometawatcher:

@AH 

I didn't read the novel (only certain parts) so if I had read this part, the first thing I would have thought was that she missed Xiang Liu and misstook TSJ as xl. I think one can find many excuses to try to negate what truly happened here, but what tsj's said confirmed that she imagined him as xl. No wonder YaoLiu shippers were so sure the one xy loves was XL and not tsj. Another scene that was obvious to me was when XL asked xy, "who do you want to spend the rest of your life with the most?" and she couldn't answer. She was fighting to not say it out loud. To me she wanted to say Xiang Liu.... because xl asked her if she wanted to marry shiqi and she murmured, yes. Shiqi is tsj. --- I'm bitter now 😂  I do not want to believe TSJ as her second choice simply because she couldn't be with XL. This story is driving me crazy! I've never thought so much about a fictional story. Lol. 

Honestly, yes her feelings for Jing might not have been cemented then. But I'm sure regardless xiao yao did fully fell for him.  Because personally if she really wasn't in love with him she wouldn't have suffered the way she did after their break up after so many. Being heartbroken over someone to the point were you have to constantly take sleeping pills for decades just to sleep is a lot. 

So, I was watching the YaoJing (21-39) cut and I know we have talked about this before, but Jing really said my grandma drugged me and XY was like "it sucks to be you, babai" Don't get me wrong, it broke my heart to see her so heartbroken, but darn....

 Ari_Lee:

So, I was watching the YaoJing (21-39) cut and I know we have talked about this before, but Jing really said my grandma drugged me and XY was like "it sucks to be you, babai" Don't get me wrong, it broke my heart to see her so heartbroken, but darn....

She was always very hard on him. I wonder why?

Maybe Xiaoyao was unsure before. But her actions after Jing "dies" prove that her love for Jing has become as great as Jing's love for her -- one can't bear to live without the other. (And that irks some YaoLiu shippers because they can't believe that she will seek death without thinking about how it will affect XL.)

XY and XL seem like two peas in a pod, which I think is why they enjoy each other's company and why they develop feelings for each other. But I'm glad it's Jing who wins her love in the long run. He makes her, pardon the cliche, want to be a better person. 

P.S. One of the scenes in season 2 I'm most excited about is her encounter with Tian Er!

 His Smile:

She sang it first to attract Fei Fei. 

Then later on in the series, we heard her sing the song twice for Jing. He even wrote a poem to answer her song. The meaning of the song depicts the love they have for each other. How can it be for XL if he and XY are not even lovers?

LOL are ppl arguing saying that the song was for XL? It is for Jing. Technically it was a song she sang before she loved anyone. Maybe she thought of her childhood memories with CX when she sang it, or perhaps it was a song she made up because she desired a life partner. The first time it was to attract fei fei and later she dedicated it to Jing.

I’m at chapter 39 of the novel and have to say, XY truly loves Jing. There were many hiccups, because they are both imperfect ppl falling in love for the first time. She does waver because of XL - at the thought of “what if”. He would be a great partner to explore the world with if he didn’t have his duties. I sometimes feel they’re like twin flames, they had similar childhood experiences and both love water. however, XY was determined to not have a doomed relationship like her parents.  If I look at it objectively, I feel like she always hangs out with him whenever she is heartbroken over Jing (XL is  kinda like a rebound sometimes to just distract her from the reality). I mean XL spends time with her willingly to cheer her up a lot of the time. And I say this as someone who loves both of the guys. I think there were several moments that just shows the depth of love XY has for Jing. She doesn’t even realize it herself as someone who is very guarded. The way they both were completely dazed and couldn’t thrive after the breakup,  how anxious XY was to finally find out the truth behind the childs paternity, insomnia, heartache…

She has love for all the guys, but Jing is the one she wanted to be with

 cometawatcher:

@AH

I didn't read the novel (only certain parts) so if I had read this part, the first thing I would have thought was that she missed Xiang Liu and misstook TSJ as xl. I think one can find many excuses to try to negate what truly happened here, but what tsj's said confirmed that she imagined him as xl. No wonder YaoLiu shippers were so sure the one xy loves was XL and not tsj.

Again, I wouldn't say that she imagined TSJ as XL. The whole interaction is obviously a re-creation of something XL did to her previously and she had XL on her mind, but that doesn't mean she mistook or pictured TSJ as XL. Especially since she reversed their roles. But it's definitely complicated and Tong Hua (as usual) leaves room for readers to come up with more than one possible interpretation. 

 cometawatcher:

Another scene that was obvious to me was when XL asked xy, "who do you want to spend the rest of your life with the most?" and she couldn't answer. She was fighting to not say it out loud. To me she wanted to say Xiang Liu.... because xl asked her if she wanted to marry shiqi and she murmured, yes. Shiqi is tsj.

I think context is really important for this scene. At this point in the story, TSJ is married to and has a kid with someone else. FFB spent 10 years being her constant companion. Teaching her archery, taking her out to shop and to eat, taking her out to explore. Generally making her happy and keeping her company so she isn't lonely at a time when ZX is focused on politics and TSJ can't be with her. Then XL spends 37 years saving her life, and afterwards he shows up as FFB a few more times, but he is no longer her constant companion.  

When Feng Long wants to set a date for their wedding, XY's in a position where she's made a commitment to him that she knows she should keep and she doesn't have an obvious alternative. Again, TSJ is not available. Although she knows FFB/XL is also not someone she can be with, she still makes XL/FFB aware that she is about to get married two months before the wedding date and seems to hope that he will come and give her a reason not to go through with it. But he never does. 

Then, in the middle of her actual wedding ceremony, he shows up as FFB and takes her away. He gives her no choice (he invokes her promise) and does it in a way (i.e., in front of all their wedding guests) that is most insulting to and shameful for Feng Long, and in a way that destroys XY's reputation. And after all of that, when they are alone, XL tells XY that FFB is "dead" (i.e., he will never use that identity again). 

So does she want to marry YSQ? Yes. Easy answer. He loves her. She loves him (she has never gotten over him even years after he married and had a son with FFYY). And, if he was available, he'd be the right person for her. 

Who does she most want to spend the rest of her life with? Much harder. ZX? TSJ? YSQ? XL? FFB? The text says "her mind refused to let her say what her heart felt" and "she encountered something that even she refused to think about".

"What her heart felt" is obviously open for interpretation. In my opinion, I think her heart feels, at that point in time, that she most wants to spend the rest of her life with FFB (i.e., the version of XL that is not tied down by loyalties to Hong Jiang or the remnant army). He is not married to anyone else. He is the person who has spent the 10+ years making her happy and keeping her company, and 37 years saving her life and staying by her side under the sea. In several previous scenes, she expresses her wish that he could be FFB forever. And she has always had a unique connection with XL, even before the poisonous bug connection was established or his blood transformed her so that she had some of his abilities.

But XL has just told her that FFB is "dead" and he previously managed to convince her (at least her mind, if not her heart) that saving her life was all just a transaction. FFB also always insisted that their relationship was transactional and temporary. More importantly, She is well aware of all the reasons why she and XL could never be together, that XL can't put her before his loyalty to Hong Jiang, and that XL's personality... well he's not "soft-hearted" or incapable of abandoning her (even for her own good) like TSJ is. 

So her heart longs for something that is both impossible and not right for her, and her mind shuts it down.

Edit: Even if my interpretation is correct (i.e., her heart did feel at that time that the person she most wanted to spend the rest of her life with was FFB), that doesn't mean part of her didn't also want to spend the rest of her life with TSJ, or ZX, or her grandfather, or her father and Ah Nian. There's definitely room in a person's heart to love and care for more than one person at a time. But XL phrased his question in a difficult way. Who did she most want to spend the rest of her life with. Not any easy question to answer when you care about many people and your first love left you (for legitimate reasons) to marry and raise a kid with someone else.

 cometawatcher:

I'm bitter now ?  I do not want to believe TSJ as her second choice simply because she couldn't be with XL.

I don't see XY as settling for TSJ simply because she couldn't be with XL. In the light of day, XY and XL would not have worked even if they both confessed their feelings for each other and tried to have a relationship. XY's mind knows that. 

TSJ is right for XY. Her mind and her heart both know that. Which is why she feels safe opening up her heart to him. And when she does open her heart, she falls in love with him. No question. Deeply enough that she was utterly heartbroken after he married FFYY.  The drama hasn't caught up with this part of the novel, but after ZX takes the throne and XY doesn't have to worry about him anymore, she falls into a deep and protracted depression and cannot get over TSJ. He was "the one". 

XL is something very important to her, but he's not "the one".