Reviews

Awesome start!

Whoa.. That was a superb start! JinGoo made it look so easy to portray a character who feels someone else's emotions and accurately convey it on screen ..very impressive!I know it's one thing to prepare and train as a chef to appear convincing on screen but it's totally on another level to act as chef and tear up on cue in front of or while prepping a sumptuous dish! Gosh! YeoJinGoo truly challenged himself with this role. Now I understand why this was turned down by other actors twice 😅..isn't an easy character to play.. Tbh! Yet, YeoJinGoo is slaying it!MunKaYoung is also doing a superb job! Right now, her character may appear weak and helpless but I'm hoping to see growth in her character in the episodes to come ❤️Great ending and cliffhanger.. The thriller added towards the end was unexpected but truly enjoyable.. It's like adding salt to my caramel macchiato 💙 The romance isn't there yet but I'm truly looking forward to it!Truly an awesome start!

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Episode 2 feedback re: autism from an autistic

Summary: Like in episode 1, this was a well done episode. No exaggeration. No sensationalized portrayal. No stereotyping.Detailed feedback:1. Taste sensitivity. - Scene: ham was changed in her gimbapAs I mentioned in my episode 1 feedback, autistics have sensory sensitivities and it is both positive and negative. Or to put it another way, it can be blessing or a curse. In this case, it is neither. Attorney Woo simply recognized the ham used was different and she did not like the new ham.Now, for Attorney Woo this seems to be okay. However, as I also mentioned in my episode 1 feedback, there are varying degrees to each trait per autistic--it does not mean that we have the same degrees of each trait just because we share it.For some autistics, changing the ingredient may become a "big issue" that neurotypicals usually misunderstand as "rude", "disrespectful", and "finicky"/"nitpicky"/"choosy". If an older autistic reacts this way, most neurotypicals would say the person is acting like a kid.For some autistics, it also has to do with not being able to handle "changes". While this is more applicable in routines, it can also apply to cases like taste (if the taste and texture are similar; it's possible an autistic may not detect it; but there is no guarantee in that).So, while our dear autistic attorney was fine with the surprise change in the ham ingredient used and her reaction was simply to remove it and express her dissatisfaction by arranging it in an "x", not all autistics will react similarly. Some may react in a way that neurotypicals will find negatively while some autistics won't even react at all.From experience, I used to be picky and I won't eat it. But as I grew up, I learned to concentrate on the food and I always think that there are other people who have nothing to eat, this helps me to just eat the food. I'm still picky but this time it is because of health and religious beliefs. But if the taste and texture is really, really, bad …2. Texture / touch sensitivity. - Scene: trying out a wedding dress.Our dear attorney commented that it was like she's wearing a clothes filled with tags/labels. It's irritating her.This is texture/touch sensitivity and is a common trait amongst autistics. Again, depending on the degree of the sensitivity, for some autistics they can only wear a particular type of clothing. For some, any would do. While for others, all the tags/labels has to be removed, and to others as long as they can not feel the tags/labels it'll be fine.But, yes, this one is correct.3. Curiosity and very observant. - Scene: meeting the client's daughter at her room.Again, this is true and is a common trait. This is also one reason why autistics hear/see things most neurotypicals can't or don't. Our eyes and attention are always roaming around, taking in our surrounding, automatically processing everything.In the attorney's case, she's processing the daughter's room in relation to her case. Under normal circumstances, she would more likely comment about so many things. But since she's there for her case, she limited it to within the parameters of her case, like why there are no pictures of her husband.And when the daughter explained, our attorney pointed out that there is actually a photo of her husband … tucked away in a corner. This was her in attorney mode, analyzing things, trying to narrow down the scenarios already in her head (since she already noticed these things, she still has to ask to narrow it down).4. Slow to get a joke.I would say this is a common trait too because the way we think and process things is logic comes first, so once we realize it was a joke, we have a late realization and reaction.I'm no stranger to this. Eventually, I learned a way around it: instead of reacting with logic/facts, I quickly process it in my head first and try to detect if it was a joke or not. It is not fool-proof, sometimes what I thought was a joke was actually not and I end up offending the person.Bottomline, it is not easy for us. We do understand simple jokes but the deeper or complex it gets the less we'll understand it and the more we'll get confused.5. Attorney Choi Su Yeon told litigation Attorney Lee Joon Ho that he should set boundaries on when Attorney Woo can talk about whales.Okay, so this is something neurotypicals are finding very hard to understand. Most neurotypicals are so concerned they might offend a neuroatypical/neurodivergent person if they tell them to stop or to set boundaries. Or, the autistic might suddenly go "wild" (neurotypical description not mine).No, we will not get offended. At least majority of us autistics won't. It is actually helpful if you do tell us to stop and if you set boundaries. However, you just need to explain it logically, because this is the way we understand and process information.In the show, Attorney Woo already understands why she talking about whales should be limited because her father always reminded her of that. Thus, Attorney Lee Joon Ho doesn't need to explain why he's setting boundaries, Woo simply understood it already.To give another context, in my case, whenever I start talking about something and you stop me because you noticed I'm just repeating myself or going endlessly about it, I take it as a sign that I've been talking forever, like Woo, I just understand it already.However, again, for some autistics this is not the case and you do have to explain why. Some will probably ignore you and still continue talking, and you really have to be patient. If it won't work, don't force it, try it another time.Some would probably say this is usually the case for "classic autism" and for those who are "high functioning" (like aspergers syndrome) "you won't have problems". Not true. It is not possible to divide autism into Category A, Category B, Category C. We do have common and uncommon traits but the degrees of these traits are different per person.Someone who is in the "classic autism" classification may understand "stop" and "boundaries" but in that same classification another will just continue talking and ignore you. The same goes in the "high functioning autism" classification, and I for one knows a lot who will just keep on talking and they're "high functioning".Bottomline, Attorney Choi Su Yeon is correct. Do set boundaries, we do appreciate setting boundaries, like come on, we set boundaries on getting touched, right? That means we understand what boundaries are for. we just need to understand why, it should make sense, it should be logical.In Woo's case, it makes sense not to talk about whales randomly and she understood that especially because her father patiently worked with her. (So clue here: support is very important; and I can not stress this enough, support at home. Today, we think of support as attending a 'special needs' school, while there is nothing wrong with that, these 'special needs' does not necessarily fit each individual. If we are different from you, we are also different from each other within the autistic community.)6. Attorney Woo laughing and was very happy when he saw Attorney Joon Ho "lovestruck". - Scene: trying a wedding dress.I can't speak for that. I'll leave that to autistic women.From my perspective, yeah, we do laugh and enjoy simple things like seeing other people dumbstruck or lovestruck because of us. I mean, we are no different from neurotypicals, we are human beings too. We just think, process, and express things differently. But deep inside, the very basic of everything? We're human beings like you. There are reactions that will always be no different from anyone else.7. Everytime she was asked to do something during a meeting, she leaves immediately.I did not explain this in episode 1 but here is why: we take things literally.This one is also not easy to explain because if I simply say "we take things literally" then one would assume we take everything literally--but that is not the case.We do think and try to analyze things however, there are some areas where we automatically take things literally because it does make sense to … well … take it literally. Like in this show, she was told to write a report/statement, so off she go to do just that.In some cases, especially in the real world, the 'boss' of the meeting would probably stop the person from leaving and ask "where are you going?" And the person would reply, "you told me to do this and that". The 'boss' would probably reply with, "are you mocking me?" or "are you serious?" or something along those lines. The autistic person would be dumbfounded because at this point, the person wouldn't know how to process things. #1 the person is now already aware s/he did something wrong; and #2 if they say more, they might make things worse.For most neurotypicals, they understand this as "do it after the meeting". But not so for autistics, especially for those working for the first time.If you see a team member or a subordinate acting this way, be patient. More likely than not, they are autistic and they either chose not to disclose it; or they do not know. If they are not autistic in anyway, then they are probably intentionally doing it … and that's a different discussion.Can we tell which things autistics will take literal? Nope. Like how each trait have varying degrees of effect; we also have different things that we take literally. For some autistics, if you tell them to "wait here", they will literally wait wherever here is, and they'll probably still be there the next morning.For some autistics, if you tell them to "wait here", they'll wait for an hour or two but then realize something is wrong or they were dupe. For some, they'll understand it immediately as "let's break up"/"end it here" or "don't follow me".If it comes to lovers quarrel, well, that makes it even more complex and confusing. I think even neurotypicals / non-autistics will be confused in a lovers quarrel scenario. If you've ever experienced this, when your girlfriend tells you to "wait here" or "stop following me" when what she actually wants is for you to follow her--but she gets angry if you follow her--so you don't know what you'll do. YEAH, that exactly is how we autistics feel and think.We end up with doing what is more logical, considering all other factors. For example, if someone tells Attorney Woo that she should not leave a meeting when she's told to do this and that … even though she will take "do this" literally, she will consider what she was told before and will stay.Like in a lovers quarrel, if the girlfriend/wife got angry when the boyfriend/husband followed her, the next time he won't follow. (But the girl will be angry again because he did not follow.) Good thing, real life isn't a lovers quarrel so it's a little bit easier to choose.---I guess that's it for episode 2.I can't wait for episode 3 because they are going to tackle an autistic trying to help an autistic with a different degree of "autisticness" (if that is even a word). I'm seeing that episode 3 will demonstrate what I meant by having common and uncommon traits but each trait have varying degrees of 'effect' on an autistic.

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Episode 1 feedback from an autistic

Summary: So far, the writer and director got everything correctly and there were no exaggerated/sensationalized scenes re: autistic and autism, in general or otherwise.My hopes are high they will maintain this "pureness" instead of adding things that does not represent us autistics.-------EDIT:Apologies for the "feeling normal and superior". I just hate the word "normal" when it comes to autism discussion because "normal" is relative (and in this subject, the majority). But I have to explain what "neurotypical" is without implying that "normal" is "normal".It has no other meaning other than being the "majority". Think of it this way, if the situation is reversed wherein autistics are the majority of the population, "normal" would mean the autistics.-------Detailed feedback:1. The kid moving (or hopping a little) left and right at a stationary position.Accurate. I do that myself. Other autistics do it differently, like swaying forward and backward (which I sometimes do myself).This is the first time I saw this depicted in a show. Usually they use "murmurs", when an autistic talks to himself/herself; or scratches their arms. While there are autistics who do that, it is not always the case.Kudos to episode 1 for showing a different one.2. Having a lot of pillows (or anything soft) at bed.Yet another trait rarely seen in shows. The most common depiction is having a lot of toys or a thick blanket (and they even use the wrong type of blanket!) In episode 1, they decided to depict the less seen in a show, lots of pillows.While many autistics prefer weighted blankets or sensory blankets, not everyone does. Some simply prefer to have a lot of soft things around them.Again, kudos for choosing to show this instead of the overly used toys and incorrect blankets.3. Sensory overload or sensory sensitivityThey did well in expressing sensory overload or sensory sensitivity in a simple, natural way. These are:- wearing of ear plugs (waking up scene)- taste sensitivity (breakfast scene)- too much awareness of one's surroundings (train scene)Most of us autistics have varying degrees of sensory sensitivity, and when there is simply too much, we enter into sensory overload situation.For example, in the train scene, the crowd and the nearness of people creates a sensory overload. There are different ways that we autistics cope with it and if we fail at that … we need to run as far away from the crowd, the noise, and everything else, otherwise we're going to have a meltdown -- by that it means, our energy will be completely drained.In the train scene, the character's way of coping with it is to listen to whale sounds. This is actually a common coping mechanism: draining one's senses of something to help tune out everything else. For example, one of my coping mechanism is to fill my thoughts with a particular problem that is not easy to solve. Or, if I am with someone, I will keep on talking about "senseless" things to help me drown out everything else.We even get irritated at small sounds most non-autistics can not hear. I hate those small sounds myself, it can wake me up too, but most people don't hear it.4. Seeing things non-autistic people doesn't see/hearOoh, I love this one. Almost all neurotypicals (a.k.a. "feeling normal and superior") fail to see things already right in front of their faces. Almost all austistics see what you can not see.This was perfectly exemplified with that iron that does look like a whale. At first it was meaningless but later in the case, it was a stepping stone which led to the solution.That is accurate. And because we see (and hear) a lot of things, it is one reason why we experience sensory overload. (Yeah it's interconnected.)5. Ways to brace oneself before doing something a person doesn't normally do; or something challengingIn the show, this was depicted as counting down before entering her supervisor's office. It's like preparing herself for something. Taking a deep breath. Getting her nerves ready.This is a common trait amongst us autistics, although in varying degrees. If an autistic can not find a way to cope up with this, it practically paralyzes us from doing anything.For example. Neurotypicals (a.k.a. "feeling normal and superior") gets nervous when going in interviews.Many autistics don't just get nervous. It's like pushing a huge rock uphill for many of us. It usually starts with applying. It's too hard to send our CV because we already know (1) they are going to call us (which many of us hates); (2) we have to shake hands (which many of us hates); (3) we have to make eye contact (which again many of us hates); (4) when we arrive at the interview schedule, they'll make us wait (which we hate big time); and the list goes on. So, if we can't push ourselves to do it, it paralyzes us.In the show, the character also observed (hospital scene) first before meeting them. It helps in preparing herself and to anticipate things, then took a deep breath. For non-autistics, they'll dismiss it as "she's bracing herself because she knew the husband and was afraid of him". Maybe, maybe not. Personally, I'm more inclined that she was not afraid of him … at all. She knew she might lose it once the husband starts his tirade.6. EcholaliaWhenever this is depicted in a show, it usually is presented as something annoying, bad, evil, and rude. In this particular show, I like how they did not do that. They turned it into something light, something people noticed but did not make a huge fuss about it.In the court scene, they even made it a little comedic scene because the judge answered back after she repeated what he said. In other shows, they'll probably have the judge reprimand her and probably ask for her dismissal for making his court a monkey court.7. Doesn't want to be touched and huggedThis is very true with almost all autistics, and often this is depicted wrongly and in a very bad way in shows where there is an autistic character.It is not so much about personal space, as neurotypicals (a.k.a. "feeling normal and superior") argue about, it is about sensitivities. Yes, we do care about personal spaces but that isn't our primary concern why we don't want to be touched and hugged without our permission. Again, take note, without our permission.For some autistics, they have touch sensitivities and if you do not inform them beforehand, it may (or may not) cause a serious spike or energy drain.For some autistics, they have sensitivities on bacteria and germs. Take note: not because you have this sensitivity does it mean you are autistic; no not all. However, this is also a common trait for some autistics.For some autistics, they highly value boundaries. Usually at work and at home, you'll see this trait reflected as well … there are literal and non-literal boundaries.So, if you know a person is autistic, do not touch them nor hug them without their permission. If they say no, don't take it personally, it has nothing to do with you, it has to do with them.If you do not know if a person is autistic and they reacted in a way that YOU think was rude or YOU think you offended them, again do not take it personally. They probably are autistic and doesn't feel comfortable in disclosing it. Again, it is NOT about you.8. Disclosing that one is in the Autism SpectrumNow, many neurotypicals (a.k.a. "feeling normal and superior") whine about "it's not our fault, if they disclosed they are autistic then we would not have acted that way". F**king seriously?What this tells us is that you'll give us a fake you just because you know we are autistic. And then later, when you get tired, you will still blame us and hope we disappear from your life -- or if you decide to move/resign, you'll blame us and speak about us to people we do not know.This is one of the many reasons why many of us do not disclose that we are autistic. Many people starts to act fake just because. It is as if we have an infectious disease.There is prejudice against autistics. In the show, I was afraid they'll turn the court into something against autistics, with the challenges the autistic attorney is facing, the judge could have said, "replace her, she's turning my court into a joke and she's taking too much time". (I'm they did not do that.)9. Autistics doesn't have feelings, emotions, sympathy, and empathy.A common false misconception thanks to psychologists. This is NOT true.We do have feelings, emotions, sympathy, and empathy, we just process and express it in a different way neurotypicals (a.k.a. "feeling normal and superior") does not understand or refuses to acknowledge.In the show, this was expressed in the hospital scene where the autistic attorney dissected "love". That short talk enabled her to stand firmly on the case for her client because she understood her client loves her husband. That is how we usually process and express it.10. Fascination with one particular subject. In the show, it's whales.This is true. If someone you know is autistic (diagnosed; not diagnosed; unknown) fascination with one particular subject is a very common trait. We know almost everything about a subject we focus on. In the show, the autistic attorney's favourite subject are whales.So … if you are non-autistic, understand this trait.---I'll end with #10, there are more but it's too long now.

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