Xiang Liu and Xiao Yao’s Story and Romance

 H19279:

I don't think at that time as WXL she had that thought. They hang out with each other. He was first curious about her, and she found a person who could understand her (her past, her loneliness etc...) Subconciously, they attracked each other. However, she as an abandoned child of her parents, she was still awared her connection with CX, his opposition to her family. That is why when WXL felt that XL was unhappy, she tried to explain the situation of GG army, tried to convince him another route. XL got mad and punished her. And her reaction "Xiao Liu’s body toppled forward onto the condor’s back like a used rag". Is that just because she got hurt? She collapsed because she understood his loyalty, he was on the opposite site of her family. When she knew Xuan as CX, she tried to analyze the reasons that XL should not have to kill CX. And the condition that she asked XL when they discussed the condition for bug transfering is he did not forced her to harm CX, YSQ and the two emperors. As WXL, she still cared for her family and closed person. She said from day 1 when they met each other, she already knew his ending. As you see in her conversation with Yellow Emperor, when she was a man, she already had the requirement of a lifetime accompany, so one put her on top priority. She didn't mention about love at all.

XY may have remembered that connection with CX, but as she told XL in the beginning, she was abandoned by everyone -- even CX,  She told him more than once, she had no family, so she wasn't XL's enemy.   She wanted to stay hidden as WXL and got a second lashing, because she did NOT want to leave Qingshui Town.

I'm not sure where time wise this scene in the novel takes place, or from that quote, what actually happened.  But regardless, XY is clearly trying to find a way for XL to survive and live.  Why is she doing that if she doesn't care about him and want to continue their relationship?

You're conflating the whole timeline of  XY.  I'm talking about when XY was WXL before CX was revealed.  XY asked about those other people in their deal, once she knew CX hadn't abandoned her, and had been looking for her -- that maybe her family didn't abandon her.  Her situation and relationship with XL changed from then.

I don't remember her ever saying anything about XL dying on the battlefield on the day they met.  Was that in the novel?  Isn't Yellow Emperor her grandfather?  I don't think they met when she was a man.  But remember, she told XL, before CX was revealed, that even temporary companionship was preferable than being alone, hence her found family of mortals. 

 H19279:

Ok, Jing or YSQ was not always available. Only the time that he got trapped by FFYY and had to marry her, the rest, he showed his intention to be with her. He had ostacles himself. He could not manage his family mess. It's his fault. However, from time to time, XY still considered future with him. What did she do when Jing got married, she asked CX to choose partner for her. Of course, FL is political choice. But she could have still declined the marriage with FL. She didn't. Sending the ice crystal ball and still proceeded the marriage. What I mean here is she chose the safer choice base on her assumption that XL destined for dying with GG and he was her beloved gege CX's enemy. Because of that though, she never paid much attention on what XL's did for her, a kind of denial behavior.

I'm not questioning Jing's intention or what he said.  He talked a good game.  But he didn't deliver.  Repeatedly.  He only got together with XY because XL saved his life twice, and all his obstacles, with one exception, conveniently died for him. 

XY didn't choose the safer choice.  She choose the only choice, Jing, if she didn't want to be alone.  And I guess that's why she was so hypocritical repeatedly ... because her alleged inflexible criteria couldn't hold up against her fear of being alone.

I don't think she consciously faced XL's future death -- the dude had 9 lives!  I think him being CX's enemy was the big obstacle.  I'm sure she did pay attention to what XL did for her -- she wanted his attention.  But she couldn't face what that actually meant, that they loved each other.

 Kokuto:

I'm not sure where time wise this scene in the novel takes place, or from that quote, what actually happened.  But regardless, XY is clearly trying to find a way for XL to survive and live.  Why is she doing that if she doesn't care about him and want to continue their relationship?

you mean the text from the novel that I included? It was before she knew Xuan was CX (in Chapter 4). Actually XY always thought of CX. As WXL, the attraction to XL was subconcious. She always cared for people close to her.. But I don't think WXL knew he loved XL by that time and wanted to spend life-time with XL. After moving the bug to XL, WXL even planned to leave QS town

"Xiao Yao ate a flower “When Grandmother died, we vowed before my mom, your mom, Auntie Ju Li, we promised them that we would always take care of each other, together and never apart. I did it, but you didn’t! Gege, you didn’t do it! (chapter 47)

.....Zhuan Xu cried “Xiao Yao, tell me! If we could do it all over again and I held you close after we reunited on Five Gods Mountain, with no chance for Jing to get close to you, would you have picked me?”

Xiao Yao was about to pass out but Zhuan Xu’s words took her back to the very beginning and it was as clear as yesterday “When I was locked up in the cage by the nine-tailed fox, all I could think of was you…..all I missed was you….when you didn’t recognize me, I still used my life to save you…….back then…….there was no Jing yet………..” Xiao Yao’s voice trailed off." (Chapter 47) 

Xiao Yao’s face was ashen white but she kept muttering the same lie over and over “I’m fine! I was already prepared…..when I first met him I knew this day would come! I always knew!  (When knowing XL died - Chapter 51)

Xiao Yao murmured “Even though I always reminded myself that he was Zhuan Xu’s enemy, but I…..I was not prepared for this! I really wish it was all a lie…..he’s so sneaky, he must’ve found a way to stay alive!  (Chapter 51)

Pay attention to the red text

I want you to be detectives

Chapter 22: But the farewell lasted for a long time: Cang Xuan interrogated Mu Fei, rescued him in thirty-seven years, and lay down in peace in thirty-seven years.

Chapter 24 Love and hate depend on each other: getting to know Snake Berry, practicing medicine for Mrs. Tai, Xiaoyao returns to Gaoxin, Emperor Jun looks at the mirror, Xiaoyao gets the magical bow, Yaoyuan returns to the Central Plains, the pain of gouging out the heart.

Chapter 49: The meeting was like a dream.
When undoing the poison, it looks like a sleeping spell from the perspective of Lord Xiangliu

"If you cannot love and live freely, death is a form of release."

Chapter 51 : "Suddenly she remembered, when she was unconscious Xiang Liu discovered the secret of the mirror and ordered her to remove it. When she woke up he never mentioned it again and she thought he forgot, but it turns out when she was unconscious he had deleted it all!"

Does anyone catch my meaning?

 blabla100:

@windiaaa

Yes, she knew it was XL who saved her, not the royal mother. Very nice catch, windiaaa! Is that what you mean? 

@blabla100: Yes !!

"If you cannot love and live freely, death is a form of release."

When I posted this article, I wondered, is there anything I missed?

Chapter 49: The meeting was like a dream. The queen mother Jing who died in childhood returns and Xuanjing confesses.

1. Explanation from " Partridge Sky: Colorful Sleeves Holding the Jade Bell attentively " by Yan Jidao of the Song Dynasty: Tonight I raise the silver lamp to look at you carefully, lest this encounter is in a dream again. Appreciation: The meeting in the dream is ultimately empty, but the lovesickness after waking up becomes deeper and more profound. So much so that when we actually meet, we can't tell whether it's a dream or reality, and we're afraid of waking up again with even more painful lovesickness in our heart and lungs.

2. When undoing the poison, it looks like a sleeping spell from the perspective of Lord Xian(Shir Bi). So the two did meet in a dream... It was the night of the moon when they were rescued in thirty-seven years, and it was early morning when Yao woke up. So Yao should hear and see everything.

3. Who doesn’t want to wake up? Who wants to be together for another thirty-seven years? When I woke up after being detoxed, the white shadow in front of me seemed like a dream.

 blimarch:

Totally! I think so too! On these moments, he is Fang Feng Liu ^^ 

Nice moniker, and very apt!

 blimarch:

TH seems to use this pattern and the uncovering of XL's white hair on purpose, to bring her back to the reality of their opposing positions and thus their impossible love:

Agreed. Which is why those times when Xiao Yao caresses his white hair, and wipes the blood from the corner of his lips mean that much more, because it shows that despite her being fully aware of the impossibility of their situation, her display of tenderness is an indication of the love she fails to hide.

 HeadInTheClouds:

This is my recollection as well. We know that he erased them when he was about to do the ritual to kill the Lovers Bugs. Do you remember if the novel mentioned when he first saw them, liddi? I don't think it was mentioned at all. In that same Bugs removal scene, we just got him thinking about his surprise when he first saw the memories. 

He mentioned it to her while she was still unconscious during the 37 years. It happened one night when he brought her to the surface to see the moon:

月儿已经快圆，周围浮着丝丝缕缕的云彩，乍一看像是给月儿镶了花边，相柳说道：“今晚的月亮有点像你的狌狌镜，你偷偷记忆在狌狌镜子里的往事……”

小夭简直全身冒冷汗。

相柳停顿了好一会儿，淡淡说：“等你醒来后，必须消除。”

小夭擦着冷汗说：只要你别发火，让我毁了狌狌镜都行！

It was almost a full moon, with wisps of clouds floating around, appearing like lace edges at first glance. Xiang Liu said, "Tonight's moon looks a little like your shengsheng mirror. The memories you secretly stored in the shengsheng mirror..."

Xiao Yao broke into a cold sweat.

Xiang Liu paused momentarily, then coolly continued, "You must erase it when you wake up."

Wiping her cold sweat, Xiao Yao thought, I can even destroy the shengsheng mirror as long as you don't lose your temper!

-- Vol 2 Ch5   (Chapter 22)

The drama covered this scene in the early part of Ep32 as well, except he brought her to the surface in the seashell, unlike the novel where he carried her, which does not explain when he saw it, since she was clearly very aware of what was going on throughout the time that he healed her and she never saw him discover the mirror during that time. 

@liddi

in chapter 24, xiaoyao still sees the gorilla mirror, meaning she knows that the memories have not been erased.

 HeadInTheClouds:

Yes. So we know that he saw it by this point. We're just not sure exactly when and we never got the scene showing him discovering them. It would have been a nice little scene. This probably added to his knowledge that she does love him, despite the whole "I don't want you in my dream".

Actually he was aware of the mirror from way back because she impudently showed it to him the time she gave him the charcoal makeover. I don't know whether he knew then what kind of mirror it was, but he had already seen it back in Vol 1 Ch3.